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ATMAKAMI......ability or disorder?

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تمام ممبرز فورم پر موجود ایڈز پر ضرور کلک کریں تاکہ فورم کو گوگل کی طرف سے کچھ اررننگ حاصل ہو سکے۔ آپ کا ایک کلک روزانہ فورم کے لیئے کافی ہے

Chapter-1 : Hypothesis

1 year later.....

Chapter-1: Hypothesis
Update-1

Ek baar mere Physics ke professor ne mujhse pucha tha ki “Arman ,how would you relate your life with Physics ?” and I thought the most appropriate answer would be…. “mujhe kya pata , lawda”….lekin us din maine wo nahi kaha tha…us din toh maine kuch aur kaha tha jo kuch yun tha….

“life is like Physics,Sir….Life is hypothesis…I mean doing various kind of things… without assuming that is true…then verify and substantiate by our own experiments and experiences.Life is a self-evident truth to explain our views……. Observations……… towards our well known social rules and responsibility….life is like Physics,sir…simple and beautiful"
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Simple and beautiful….par main kabhi kabhi sochta hoon ki kya main sahi tha…kya sach me life simple aur beautiful hai…mujhe apni zindagi dekhkar toh aisa bilkul nahi lagta…kitni kamal ki baat hai ki jis cheez ko us din main dusaro ko follow karne ke liye kah raha tha uska exception main khud hoon….

“aaj bhi koyi nahi hai”mayoos hokar maine hostel me apne room ko gusse se band kiya aur hostel se bahar ki taraf chal diya

Waise toh main yaha kayi baar aa chuka hoon, bahut kuch chize pahle se thodi badali-badali bhi nazar aati hai lekin mere hostel ke bahar rakhi wo jung lagi kursi aaj bhi wahi rakhi thi,jaha pahle raha karti thi…jaha baithkar hum log udhar se aane-jane wale logo ko pareshan kiya karte the. us chair par baithkar maine apne jeb se cigarette nikala lekin tabhi mujhe yaad aaya ki procedure toh ye nahi hai…procedure ke mutabiq mujhe pahle goggle lagana chahiye phhir cigarette jalani chahiye…isliye maine phle goggle lagaya aur phhir cigarette jalakar gand –fad lamba kash kheecha aur tab tak wahi baitha raha jab tak Arun college se waha nahi aa gaya….

“hey, Arun”use baithne ki jagah dete hue maine kaha

“hey Varun….mera matlab, Arman…. “baithte hue wo bola”sorry, woh flow-flow me Varun ka name nikal gaya” 

“koyi mila college me”

“ghanta… pura college sunsaan hai…Esha toh door ki baat hai”bolte hue Arun ne apna sar peechhe tikaya aur aankh band karke baith gaya

“kitna acha lagta hai yaha aakar…hai na Arun…par afsos ki baat hai ki yaha aksar hum dono ke siway aur koyi nahi hota….pata nahi baki log kab aayenge”

“haan…acha toh lagta hai yaha”aankh band karke lambi saans lete hue Arun ne kaha”isiliye tune ise banaya…in sabko…ye hostel…college….sadak….mujhe”

“maine nahi banaya ye sabkuch…main toh khud yaha aksar fas jata hoon…shayad ye meri koyi bimari hai…jo bhi ho…mujhe ye bahut pasand hai. pata nahi main hamesha ke liye yaha kab rah paunga”

“Arman….main haqiqat me yaha nahi hoon aur na hee tu…tujhe college bahut pasand tha….isliye tera dimag tujhe ye sab dikha raha hai, tune mujhe apne dimag ke kisi hisse se nikala aur ab tu try mar raha hai ki Esha bhi yaha aa jaye….lekin Arman, asliyat ye nahi hai….asliyat tere 1400 gram ke dimag ke bahar hai….ab main aur Esha teri zindagi ka hissa nahi hai…tujhe apni zindagi jeeni hogi…lekin aise nahi…ye sab toh ek dhokha hai…kayaro ki tarah apne sach se door bhagna hai…teri college life khatm ho chuki hai. ab tu hostel me nahi rahta aur na hee Esha yaha hai . tujhe ye samajhna hoga….bajay iske ki tu apne andar us chiz ko dhoondh raha hai, jo teri kabhi thi hee nahi…..main hamesha yahi chahta tha ki tu, Esha…se kabhi na mile aur na hee us se baat kare…lekin tune college me kabhi meri nahi suni….lekin ab bhi waqt hai….samay ke antarjaal se nikal aur ek nayi shuruat kar…mera kya hai ,main toh jaha choot dekhta hoon wahi lund daal deta hoon, lekin main tere liye aisa nahi chahta…you deserve better….. than this double F (fucking frustrated) life…Arman ,you know… once you were the best for us…for all of us…but now you are the worst…kya tune kabhi socha hai ki kyun tere baki ke dost…jinhone har chhoti badi ladayi me tera sath diya wo ab tujhse baat bhi kyun nahi karte….aur……………… “

“aur…..?”

Jab Arun beech me bolte hue achanak ruk gaya toh maine uski taraf dekha par wo waha nahi tha..wo waha se jaa chuka tha….yahi toh problem hai is jagah ki….ki wo hamesha aise achanak gayab ho jata hai jaise sala mera dost na ho balki batman ho…..par Arun ka yun achanak gayab hona mere liye ek sanket tha….ki ab yaha mauzood har chiz buri tarah se hilegi....dharti ghumegi aur mere sar me ek tez dard uthega….aur aisa hua bhi.ek tez dard mere sar me utha…dard itna tez tha ki sala laga jaan hee chali jayegi…main jor se chillaya aur chillate hue wahi zameen par gir gaya…par ye mere liye nayi baat nahi thi ye toh pichhale kayi haftoh se mere sath ho raha tha ki achanak main kahi baithe baithe yaha pahuch jata hoon….jaha mujhe Arun milta hai….jisase main do char baate karta hoon aur jab wo achanak gayab ho jata hai toh mere aas-paas mauzood har chiz vibrate karne lagti hai yaha tak ki mera dimagh bhi……yani ki sab kuch sirf mere dimag ke kisi hisse me hota hai aur tab main apne us physics se life ko relate karne wale answer ke bare me sochta hoon jisme maine kaha tha ki …life is simple and beautiful….just like physics.
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“mujhe kya pata ,lawda…..correct answer hota.khamkha dialoguebazi me life ko simple aur beautiful bol gaya…yadi ye simple hai toh complicated kya hoga…”haqiqat me wapas aakar apna sar dabate hue maine kaha...


Ab toh Mujhe aisa lagta hai ,jaise ki main khud ko nahi janta..jaise ki maine ek jaal apne aas-paas bun rakha ho aur badalte waqt ke sath usme fasta hee ja raha hoon..waise toh kahne ko mere paas bahut kuch hai aur use sunne ka samay bhi aapke paas hai lekin mudda jo ye hai ki main iski shuruat kaha se karu…waha se shuru karu jaha se 8th semester khatm hua tha ya phhir waha se jab main ghar chhodkar Nagpur apne dost Varun ke paas aaya…ya phhir waha se jab maine Nagpur me Nisha ko pahli baar dekha…lekin ye sab toh main bata chuka hoon toh kyun na waha se shuru kiya jaye jaha se life ne meri aur maine life ki leni shuru kar di…

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College ke baad ki zindagi aasan nahi hoti aur khaskar tab nahi jab apne meri tarah jhande gade ho…college me maine zindagi ke lagbhag sabhi pahaluo ka anubhav kar liya tha…mera matlab dosti, dushmanni, pyar, dhokha,mutth marna,sex karna…ladayi karna…jail jana wo bhi murder ke case me aur phhir jail se aakar baki bache 10-12 dino me pelam pel padhayi karke 8.5 CGPA se B.Tech complete karna….koyi sochega ki ab life me isse bura kuch nahi ho sakta.lekin mujhe kya pata tha ki wo toh kuch bhi nahi tha..asal zindagi toh ab shuru hui thi…

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Kahne ko toh meri zindagi me ab bhi hariyali thi…I mean…naukari…chhokari…free wifi…ab isse adhik bhala ek Engineer ko kya chahiye ? lekin College chhodne ke baad maine ek chiz jo apne bare me guar ki thi wo ye ki main Depression me tha…main Esha ko left side se pyar karta tha iske bare me toh main janta tha…lekin main ye nahi janta tha ki uske chale jane ke baad ya mere chale jane ke baad main aisa ho jaunga….ek ajab hi gussa…ek ajeeb si kabhi na mitne wali udasi ne mujhe grasit kar diya tha,jiske karan jab kabhi bhi main Nisha ke sath hota tab bhi mere dil-o-dimag me Esha hee chhayi rahti thi aur kabhi-kabhi toh gusse se dil karta tha ki ek lohe ka sariya loon aur jakar Nisha ke sath uske pure khandan ko khatm kar doon…I mean…Esha..BC Nisha aur Esha ke chakkar me main jitna confuse hua hoon utna toh main Centroid aur Center of Gravity , term me bhi nahi hua tha…

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Par problem ye nahi thi…problem ye thi ki main in sabke bare me subah 4 baje uthkar kyu soch raha hoon aur main problem ye thi ki yadi main abhi utha hoon toh phhir is waqt mujhe apne flat me hona chahiye…jo ki main nahi tha….main toh is waqt apne colony ke park me deewar se koodkar uske andar ghas par baitha daru pee raha tha…Thug Life !  lekin main in sabke bare me kyun bata raha hoon toh jawab hai…jaisa ki maine pahle hi kaha hai ki waise toh kahne ko mere paas bahut kuch hai aur aapke paas use sunne ka samay bhi hai…so let’s start it.


UPDATE-2

“you know…I just hate everyone…everyone…fucking everyone…I hate Varun…Nisha…her father…her mother….her security guard….her lesbo partner Sonam(who’s also Varun’s girlfriend)…I hate every man and woman……yes ! I hate the whole mannkind…I’m the guy who’s fucking frustrated…You know my friend, there is a special word in dictionary for me, who hates mannkind…I don’t know it now but I’ll tell you later or you can see it for yourself”kahte hue maine mere bagal me baithe apne naye dost ki aankho me dekha 
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Jaise main use dekh raha tha waisich same toh same wo bhi meri aankho me dekh raha tha aur main samajh gaya ki lawda use kya chahiye… main samajh gaya ki use meri in baton me koyi dilchaspi nahi hai, wo toh lawda yaha subah ke 4 baje uthkar isliye aaya hai kyuki use free ka chakna jo khane ko milta hai….

“meet my new friend…Bisleri….” 

jo ki humare colony me ghumne wala ek awara kutta hai aur isse meri pahchan kal raat isi park me hui thi….kal raat bole toh kal subah matlab kal subah 4 baje ke karib...maine chips ke packet me se kuch chips apne muh me dala aur kuch Bisleri ke muh me aur phhir pura peg ek saans me andar le liya……
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“hat MC…pani kam ho gaya”kahte hue main ek bar phhir Bisleri ki taraf dekha…wo meri taraf hi dekh raha tha.jiske baad maine packet me bacha baki chips bhi uske samne udel diya aur daru ki bottle uske muh me fasate hue bola “daru ki botal sambhal kar rakhna be ,nahi toh chodunga….ye botal tere liye mere pyar ki nishani hai…”
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Nisha ke mere zindagi me aane ke kuch samay baad mujhe laga tha ki jaise ab sab kuch thik ho gaya hai aur wakayi me aisa hua bhi tha…kyuki mere dimag me ab kabhi bhi tez dard nahi hota tha aur na hee mere mare hue dost ke mujhe sapne aate the…yaha tak ki Aradhna se bhi lagbhag-lagbhag pichha chhoot gaya tha. Lekin aajkal Nisha mujhe kuch khas bha nahi rahi thi…lekin iska matlab ye nahi hai ki wo ab mujhe khoobsurat…hot ya sexy nahi lagti…uske liye meri feelings same hai lekin aajkal main us-se chidhne laga hoon….pata nahi kyun ? aur aisa mere sath ek baar pahle bhi hua tha…aisich same feeling mere andar Aradhna ke liye bhi aayi thi jiske baad maine suddenly us-se breakup kiya tha aur usne zindagi se…
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“Arman, tum…itni subah…”ek ladki ne mera name lete hue kaha

“haan…waise aap kaun…aur itni subah se kya matlab hai tumhara…ab toh dopahar hone ko aa gayi hai ”

“main Nisha ki friend…itni jaldi bhool gaye…kal raat ko hum sab movie dekhne gaye the…”mayoos hote hue wo boli aur isi ke sath uske sath me khadi uski saheli bhi mayoos ho gayi…
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“haan…yaad aaya Shipra…waise kaun si Shipra ho tum…Kshipra wali ya simple Shipra….”

“simple Shipra…”haste hue usne jawab diya

“tumhe kaise bhool sakta hoon main…tu hee hai na wo jo kal raat me 500  ka sirf popcorn kha gayi thi…sach bata ghar me khana-vana nahi milta kya …ya ye teri aadat hee hai ki dusaro ke paiso pe aish karna…apne boyfriend ko toh gatak gayi hogi tu ab tak…mera kahne ka matlab hai ki kuch toh sharam lihaj kiya kar…ab apni saheli ko hee dekh le kab se line mare ja rahi hai mujhe…mana ki bahut smart ,handsome…intelligent hoon main lekin iska matlab ye toh nahi ki jis thali me khaya usi ko chura loge…chottiyo…ruk abhi Nisha ko call karke batata hoon ki tum dono ne mujhe propose mara hai….arey bhag kaha rahi hai ruk…..”
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“aajkal ki ladkiya bhi na ,hath pakdao toh lund pakad leti hai…i…i..just hate everyone…waise time kya hua hai…Suraj uncle toh kab ka dastak de chuke hai…”kahte hue maine apni ghadi me time dekha “oh teri ! 8 baj gaye…aur apun ab tak ghum rela hai…”

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Apne room par main subah 9 baje pahucha aur pahuchte hee Varun se pucha ki uska sabse jhakkas formal dress kaha hai lekin Varun ko bhi mujhse kuch puchna tha isliye usne mere sawal pe sawal daga aur bola…

“tu tha kaha be raat bhar….”

“aa raat bhar…aa raat bhar…jaye na ghar….jaye na ghar”jawab me main chair par baitha aur mobile nikalte hue gungunane laga

“BC, 4 missed calls…ye Nisha puri yedi ho gayi hai….janti hai ki main us type ka launda nahi hoon,jo raat bhar apni item se baat kare…lekin phhir bhi har din…I mean..har raat ko pachaso bar phone karegi…lavda main seedha sadha aadmi hoon jiski sirf seedhi sadhi demand hai…thoda sa pyar aur bahut sara sex…lekin nahi inko toh dono chiz hee pel ke chahiye…ab kaha se laun itna pyar jab mere andar hai hee nahi,toh…aur beta Varun…ye Nisha ki friend jo Sonam hai na jiske sath tera chakkar chal raha hai us-se thoda bach ke rahiyo…mujhe toh shakal se hee ek number ki chudail-dayan lagti hai…zara sambhal kar rahna kahi teri bali na de de….”

“kya be Arman ,kuch bhi bole ja raha hai tu Nisha aur Sonam ke bare me…dono kitni achi ladkiya hai…tu zaroor daru peekar aaya hai…warna tu aisa nahi bolta”apni aankhe badi karte hue Varun ne mujhe chup hone ka ishara kiya lekin maine apni baat continue ki…

“dekh bhai ,aisa hai …mujhe sach bolne ke liye daru ki zaroorat nahi…waise Sonam se yaad aaya…sale kal raat bhar tere karan main bahar raha…tune toh bade aram se raat ke 10 baje call karke kah diya ki Arman ek ghante ke liye room se chale ja…Sonam ke sath fukam-fakayi karni hai….”
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“toh phhir ek ghante baad aa jana chahiye tha na...aur thoda dheere bol”


“lawda aa jana chahiye tha…ab main thahra sanyasi aadmi jaha do botal daru, do packet chakna aur do cigarette ke sath do kadam zameen mili…bas wahi apni duniya…khair tu bata choda ki nahi….”

Main aur bhi bahut kuch Varun se puchta…aur bhi bahut kuch Varun ko apne adventurous last night ke bare me batata…lekin tabhich ek jordar aawaz mere kano me padi…jise sunke meri to fati hee…par Varun ki to fat ke hath me aa gayi…wo aawaz jisne hum dono ki fad di thi wo aawaz Sonam ki girlfriend Varun….mera matlab Varun ki girlfriend Sonam ki aawaz thi…

“are you guys fucking kidding me….”

“no…but According to Shri Arman’s law… the total anger emitted per unit time by Sonam is directly proportional to the fourth power of our fear….”calculation karte hue main sirf itna hee bol paya…

“Varun…tumhe to main baad me siddha karti hoon…lekin Arman tumne abhi jo kuch bhi mere aur Nisha ke bare me kaha hai…wo main ek-ek shabd jakar Nisha ko batane wali hoon…asshole”itna kahkar Sonam to waha se khisak li lekin hum dono bhari tension me aa gaye….tension kya,mujhe to aisa laga jaise kisi ne meri lulli hee kat li ho…

“Varun…that’s why, I hate everyone….aakhir freedom of speech bhi koyi chiz hai ki nahi is desh me….aakhir log sanvidhan ka palan kyun nahi karte  ”
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Maine Nisha aur Sonam ke bare me jo uche vichar thodi der pahle vyakt kiye the us-se jyada tension mujhe honi chahiye thi aur Varun ko shanti se baith kar shantipath karna chahiye tha…lekin aisa bilkul nahi ho raha tha…Varun tension me pure flat me ghoom raha tha aur idhar main aaram se baith kar aaram kar raha tha….

“Goldflake Lite is better…”cigarette ke dhue ka chhalla banate hue maine kaha “abey try to mar”

“Arman…what the….”kheej kar Varun bolte-bolte ruk gaya..

“what the hell or what the fuck ? anyway, what does that ASSHOLE term even mean….Gand ka ched…? ye kaisi gali hai be…”

“tu kabhi kabhi bahut over ho jata hai be Arman…ab phhir se Sonam ko manane me kayi din lag jayenge…”

“dekh bidu…wo sab apun dekh lega…lekin abhi mujhe interview ke liye jana hai, isliye ye sab baate baad me…”

“interview..”shocked hote hue Varun ne puchha “kaha…”

“Machine ke parts design karne wali ek company hai ,wahi maine resume dala tha…”bachi kuchi cigarette ko ungali me fasakar dustbin me nishana sadhte hue main bola “aur unhone resume accept kar liya… goal…”

“congrats…toh finally tu serious hone laga hai…par dekhna kahi pichhali wali company ki tarah ye bhi tujhe bahar na fek de…be careful”

“hmm…uh”

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Interview dene main full taiyar hokar aur full taiyari ke sath gaya tha, actually mujhe lagbhag wo sabhi question pahle se hee maloom the jo wo waha puchhane wale the ,jiske liye jawab bhi maine soch rakha tha….Interview dene main time se decided venue me pahucha lekin mujhe waha kafi samay tak baitha kar rakha gaya…maine ek do baar waha baithi receptionist se puchha bhi ki ‘aur kitna time lagega’..jispar wo pahli baar to kuch nahi boli lekin mere ek aur baar puchhane par wo thoda muh banate hue boli ki
“yadi itni hee jaldi hai toh kahi aur chale jao”

Jispar maine kuch nahi kaha aur chupchap aakar jaha baithkar usne mujhe wait karne ke liye kaha tha,wahi baith kar wait karne laga….main kafi der tak waha baitha raha taqriban do ghante…nahi dhayi ghante…actually teen ghante…confirm, dhayi ghante….jiska reason ye tha ki jise mera interview lena tha wo aaya hee nahi tha……

“oh mister, mobile baad me chalana….andar jao interview ke liye…”dhayi ghante baad usi Receptionist ne mujhe aawaz dekar kaha

“BC , kitna akad rahi hai…naukari ka sawal hai, nahi to ek mukka marta to ek mahine tak dard me rahti….koyi kadra hee nahi hai, tu rook….naukari lagne de….phhir tujhe sudharunga….”Receptionist ko dekhkar main badbadaya aur sath me use thank you bhi bola….
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“I just hate everyone…”interview dene ke baad main jaise hee bahar nikla waise hee mere muh se ye line apne aap nikli…lekin kyun ? interviewer to achche the , mera interview bhi achcha gaya tha…late hone par unhone mujhe cold drink , tea , coffee ka bhi offer diya tha….phhir maine aisa kyun bola ? yes …I got it…I hate the whole mankind.
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“hello,Arman…”

“nahi ,main Arman ka papa bol raha hoon, aap kaun beta…”aawaz badalkar main bola…

“Good evening uncle, Main…Main Nisha…”thoda hichkichate hue Nisha boli…shayad wo bhi thoda soch me pad gayi thi ke mere papa kaha se Nagpur aa gaye…

“acha to tum wahi Nisha ho…jo maal dikhti aur jiske boobs…ahhhh….wait,I’m cumming….”mere itna bolte hee Nisha ne phone kat diya lekin uske turant baad usne mujhe dobara call bhi kiya….

“Arman…church ke paas wale park me abhi milo…”

“mera intezar karna….I’m cumming”kahte hue maine mobile ektaraf feka aur wapas Varun ka formal dress pahan-ne laga…jo ki room me aakar maine utar diya tha…room ke gate se maine park tak ka trajectory set kiya aur khud ko apne room se launch kar diya…lekin main park me land karta uske pahle hee mujhe yaad aaya ki main condom toh room me hee bhool gaya hoon…isliye main trajectory ko reverse mode me dalkar…wapas room par pahucha aur condoms ka packet uthaya kya pata kab zaroorat pad jaye…condoms ki…

“Arman…logo ki kadra karna sikh ja…khas kar ke unki jo teri karte hai…mera matlab hai ki tujhe kya zaroorat hai Nisha se aise baat karne ki…use dekh kitni rich hai..kitni pretty hai…lekin maine is baat ka zara sa bhi ghamannd uske andar nahi dekha….i’m sorry lekin yadi wo chahe to tere jaise kayiyo ko har din badal sakti hai…”condom ka packet lekar main nikal raha tha ki Varun ne mujhe tokte hue kaha

“one correcton please….mere jaise kayiyo ko nahi…main antique piece hoon…”Varun ki taraf palatkar main bola”aur sale din ba din mota hota ja raha hai tu…tu uski fikar kar…meri fikar mere pe chhod de…happy”

“tu pahle aisa nahi tha…mana ki tere sath kuch bura hua hai ,kuch bure log tujhe mile hai…lekin doodh ka dhula toh tu bhi nahi hai…galti to teri bhi thi…par iska matlab ye to nahi ki tu aane wale achche logo aur unki achchhayio ki kadra hee na kare…”

“ toh yadi aapka ye lecture samapt ho gaya ho to main prasthan karu…kyunki tere anusar jiski mujhe kadra karni chahiye wo park me baithi mera intezar kar rahi hai aur yadi Shri Varun ki izazat ho to main uski kadra karne jaun….”

“gand marao lawda, mujhe kya…”

“exactly….”kahte hue maine goggle lagaya aur cigarette muh me ek side dabakar ek selfie li aur room se wapas park tak ka trajectory set karke khud ko launch kiya
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“bahut jaldi nahi aa gaye”park me mere land karte hee hee Nisha taana marte hue boli aur maine do ungali apne hontho par rakhkar ishara kiya ki main cigarette pee raha tha….

“aaj tumne meri friend Shipra ko kya bola”mudde pe aate hue Nisha ne pucha..

“chal pahle thoda udhar khisak…phhir batata hoon..air friction bahut jyada tha…Kurkure sir..mera matlab Kurre sir sahi kahe the ki..aap physics ke khilaf nahi ja sakte”

“kyun idhar baithne me kya problem hai…”

“problem to mujhe teri god me bhi baithne se nahi hai..lekin iska matlab ye to nahi ki main tere god me hee baith jaun…Got it…ab chal khisak…khisak na…hadd hai…tujhe kya lagta hai ki main us side baithkar badminton khelne wali un ladkiyo ko line marunga…”

“to thik hai ,mat khisak…mujhe kya, main kal aake line mar jaunga…”

“aaj tumne meri friend Shipra ko kya bola”wapas mudde pe aate hue Nisha ne pucha..

“kaun Shipra…acha wo…..Varun ki item…ya wo item jiske paas koyi item hee nahi hai”

“ye item-item kya laga rakha hai…Arman…aisi cheap language ka istemal tum kyun karte ho, ye jante hue bhi ki mujhe aisi language pasand nahi aur jab wo meri friend ho tab to bilkul bhi hai…humari society me iske liye ek special word hai...Girlfriend….tum Shipra ko wo to kah hee sakte ho…maine kya tumhare kisi dost ko kabhi kameena…kutta kaha…nahi na…phhir tum mere friends ke liye aise words kyun istemal karte ho…aur waise bhi Shipra , Varun ki item nahi….”bolte-bolte Nisha achanak ruk gayi , kyunki josh-josh me uske muh se bhi item shabd nikal gaya tha aur main rakshasi hasi ke sath daant fadne laga

“ha…ha….ha….”

 

Chapter-2 : Tempus Itinerantur

“mera matlab tha ki Shipra,Varun ki girlfriend nahi hai…Varun ki girlfriend to Sonam hai…Shipra to wo hai jo aaj subah tumhe mili thi aur tumne use kaha tha ki wo 500  ka popcorn kha gayi thi, iske baad tumne uske sath badtameezi bhi ki aur bola ki wo tumhe line de rahi hai…vagerah-vagerah….”

“vagerah-vagerah…matlab etc. etc.”

“haan”

“wahi na jo hum answer likhte samay use karte hai…”

“haan  ”

“waise sach batau…actually I don’t remember her…mujhe lag toh raha hai ki koyi mujhse mila tha..lekin kaun ye mujhe thik se yaad nahi hai”

“really…”

“teri kasam…”

Aur phhir mere itna bolte hee Nisha ne apna chehra dusari taraf kar liya aur bahut der tak chup baithi kuch sochati rahi…

“aur Sonam se tumne kya kaha…ki…main pagal hoon , jo tumhe raat-raat bhar phone karte rahti hoon…tumne Sonam se kaha ki main yedi hoon…ye yedi kya hota hai…”

“yedi matlab…matlab…innocent…intelligent aur Sonam se maine aisa kuch bhi nahi kaha…phhir se teri kasam…”

“tumne mujhe pagal samajh rakha hai kya…”apne hath me rakha mobile gusse se door fekte hue Nisha boli “tumne mujhe samajh kya rakha hai ,jo har baar meri jhoothi kasam kha rahe ho…tumhe kya lagta hai ki…ki main bewkoof hoon…jise tum kuch bhi bologe aur main maan jaungi…”

“teri kasam…sorry..abki baar meri kasam …yadi dekha jaye toh technically,maine Sonam se kuch nahi bola….wo toh maine apne dost Varun se bola tha…jise phhir Sonam ne sun liya tha…ab bol jhootha kaun…”

“par tumne to mere bare me aakhir wo sab kaha na….”

“actually wo ek prank tha…jo main aur Varun milkar Sonam ke sath kar rahe the..prank matlab ,hum ek funny video bana rahe the…jisme hum Sonam ka reaction record kar rahe the….”Nisha ke mobile ko uthakar maine use dete hue kaha “ab ye mat kahna ki tu mujhse yaha sirf isliye milne aayi thi kyunki tujhe Sonam ne mere bare me kuch kaha tha…”

“sach kahu to haan…main yaha sirf isiliye tumse milne aayi thi…teri kasam…”

“tumne just abhi abhi mera dil tod diya…”

“toh…”

“toh…jab tumne sach kaha hai to main bhi sach bol hee deta hoon…wo prank nahi tha…wo sabkuch jo Sonam ne tumse kaha uski ek-ek line …ek-ek shabd yaha tak ki ek-ek matra sach thi…main tujhse aur tere phone calls se trast ho gaya hoon…aur ek baat, Shri Arman ko tujh jaisi ladki nahi samajh sakti…tum logo ka level hee nahi hai mere sath rahne ka…tum log bas gaal aur hoth pichka-kar selfie lo….i..i… I just hate everyone…I hate Bhipra…sorry Shipra…I hate Sonam…I hate your parents….i hate you….tum log please kahi chale jao…please…chale jao…kahi bhi…Delhi…Mumbai…Chennai…uganda…”

“okay…Arman…Goodbye…”itna bolkar Nisha uthi aur waha se jane lagi….

“just getlost…mujhe kisi ki zaroorat nahi hai…main akele hee ye story hit kara sakta hoon”apna sar dono hatho se dabate hue main bola“MC ye sar kyun itna dukh raha hai…”

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Aur phhir mujhe kuch aawaze sunayi dene lagi,jo waha aas-paas ki bilkul nahi thi…mere hath-pair achanak se sunn hone lage aur dhundhale se kuch chitra ya phhir kahe ki drishya mere samne aane lage…meri aankh puri tarah khuli nahi thi aur na hee puri tarah band thi…lekin phhir bhi mujhe samne park ka kuch bhi dikhai nahi de raha tha…jaise ki kisi ne achanak hee park ko gayab kar diya ho…pahle pahal to mujhe laga ki ye ek sapna hai lekin phhir mujhe ye ahsaas hua ki ye koyi sapna nahi balki ek haqiqat hai…jiska andaza mujhe tab laga jab maine us drishya me apne bade bhai ko dekha…par wo drishya ek sapna nahi balki haqiqat hai iska andaza mujhe tab hua jab maine khud ko us drishya ke andar dekha…par ye kaise mumkin hai ? main to yaha sabke samne park me baitha hoon phhir main waha kaise ho sakta hoon…main janta hoon ki main greatest hoon lekin ek sath do jagah par hona…ye mere liye possible nahi hai…darasal ye drishya jo mere sar me uthe dard ke karan dikhayi de raha hai wo mere past ki kuch haqiqat hai jinhe maine shayad hee kisi ko bataya ho…shayad bole to 100 % confirm….that’s Arman’s language

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Meri, mere bhai ke sath kabhi bhi nahi jami..na hee bachpan me aur na hee ab…hum aksar kayi chizo ke liye ladte the…par phhir aap sochenge ki isme kaun si nayi baat hai,lawda…… ye to har kahani ka ghar hai, I mean…ye toh har ghar ki kahani hai…lekin nahi ye har ghar ki kahani nahi hai ye thoda alag aur thoda dangerous hai…thoda se mera matlab hai…bahut jyada.you know ….its apun’s language.

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“Arman jita de bhai yar,izzat ka sawal hai…”

“izzat…? iski parwah mere dosto ke samne mujhe marne se pahle karna chahiye tha…”

“dekh 200  ka match hai…main tujhe 500 dunga…”

“khoon ke badle khoon aur bezzati ke badle bezzati…”kahte hue main aage badha aur puri taqat ke sath cover ki disha me bat ghuma diya aur phhir peeche palat kar apne bhai ko angootha dikhaya….waise ch aur dikhane ka tha par Bhai tha isliye sirf angootha hee dikhaya


Shot khelne ke baad maine yahi socha tha ki ball ab boundary par jakar hee dum legi lekin ball ek ped se takrayi aur wahi rook gayi,tab non-striker end me khade mere dost ne mujhe aawaz di aur humne bhagkar jaldi se 2 runs le liye….aur itne hee run hume jeetne ke liye chahiye the….match jeetne ke baad maine ek baar phhir Vipin bhaiya ko angootha dikhaya aur wo sirf apna daant piskar rah gaye,unka bas chalta toh wo mujhe wahi patak-patak kar marte…lekin us samay unki girlfriend apni kuch saheliyo ke sath waha thi aur kuch dusare log bhi the ,jo waha match dekh rahe the…jiske karan Vipin bhaiya ne apna gussa apne andar hee daba liya…

Waha match dekhne walo ke liye ye sirf ek team ke player dwara opponent team ke player ko tease karna tha ,lekin hum dono ke liye ye kuch jyada tha…jaha India me cricket har dharm ke logo ko jodta hai wahi cricket ne hum dono bhaiyo me darar dalni shuru kar di thi…

Meri ek aadat hamesha se thi ki jab main kisi ka Mazak udata hoon to marte dum tak uska Mazak udata hoon…toh phhir isme main apne bhai ko kaise chhod sakta tha…jaha Vipin bhaiya ke andar match harne ka gussa tha wahi ghar par mere indirectly comments ne unka gussa aur badha diya….

“Maa…humare school ka ek senior hai..pata nahi khud ko kya samajhta hai…kal usne mere dosto ke samne meri utari aur aaj maine…bada aaya tha,role jamanne…Maa ,pata hai.. kaise match ke aakhiri kshado me wo aaj mere samne gidgida raha tha…”bolte hue main ruka aur Vipin bhaiya ki aawaz behude tarike se nikalte hue bola “Arman,match jeeta de bhai yar, izzat ka sawal hai…dekh match 200  ka hai main tujhe 500  dunga…please bhai …maan ja yar…”

“Arman…ab bas kar, bahut pareshan kar liya tune Vipin ko…”Kitchen se Maa boli
Lekin main kaha rukne wala tha…maine Vipin bhaiya ki khilli udani jari rakhi….

“mom…pata hai..aaj match dekhne kaun aaya tha….”

“Arman ,yadi tune Aksha ka naam bhi liya toh soch lena…patak-patak ke marunga….”dheemi aawaz me Vipin bhai saab bole 

“ab pata chala kaisa lagta hai…jaleel hona…remember , bezzati ke badle bezzati…”maine bhi dheemi aawaz me kaha

“ab yadi tune ek aur shabd bola toh….ye taala jo chair par rakha hai…seedhe fek ke marunga…”kahte hue Vipin bhaiya ne chair par rakha taala utha liya….

Par mujhe pata tha ki Vipin bhaiya kabhi bhi wo taala mujhpar nahi fekenge …mujhe kya,waha meri jagah aur bhi koyi hota toh wo wahi sochta…isliye maine apna karyakram jaari rakha aur Maa se kaha…

“Maa, jo aaj ke match ka special guest tha…uska naam Aks ….”

Pahle toh mujhe samajh nahi aaya ki kya hua , main aise kaise Aksha ka naam lete hue rook gaya…lekin jab mere mathe se khoon tapak kar neeche aaya toh mujhe pata chala ki Vipin bhaiya ke hath me jo taala tha….wo seedhe aakar mere sar me laga tha….main is waqt jitney gusse me tha us-se jyada kahi hairan tha ki Vipin bhaiya ne aakhir ye kar kaise diya…

“chup ho ja…Arman , warna…sale, patak-patak ke marunga….”

“ab toh seedhe jakar…Aksha ke baap ko bataunga,phhir dekhna kaise uska baap uske andar se ishq ka bhoot utarta hain….”

“sale tameej nahi hai kya…baat karne ki…”mere paas aakar Vipin bhaiya ne ek mukka aur mere mathe pe jad diya aur dusara mukka uthane hee wale the ki maine unhe peeche dhakel diya....jisase unka pair wahi paas rakhi table se ladkhadaya aur wo apna balance khokar seedhe sar ke bal zameen pe ja gire…
Maine bahut tej dhakka diya tha..jiske karan Vipin bhaiya bahut teji ke sath gire the…physics ki language me bole toh impact kafi jyada tha…isliye Vipin bhaiya jaise hee zameen par gire unke sar ke pichhale hisse se khoon nikalne laga yani ki unka bhi sar phoot gaya tha….Vipin bhaiya ke sar se khoon nikalta dekh maine aav na dekha taav…aur ghar se bahar bhag gaya…..

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“Arman…uth…itni raat ko park me kya kar raha hai …”mujhe hilate hue Varun bola

“Varun tu…”

“haan…chal room chal…”

“ghar nahi jaunga main…Vipin bhaiya se meri ladayi ho gayi hai…maine unka sar fod diya hai….ab ghar jaunga to mammi-papa bahut marenge….”Varun ki taraf dekhkar maine jawab diya…jiske baad Varun kuch der tak mujhe ektak aise dekhta raha….jaise maine use hath me apna lund thama diya ho…I mean.. full shoked

“Arman , ya toh tu pagal ho gaya hai ya tu mujhe pagal bana raha hai…abey tu yaha hai…Nagpur me…bhool gaya kya ki tu ek saal pahle ghar chhodkar yaha aaya tha mere paas….”mujhe pakad kar uthate hue Varun ne kaha “tu chal…room .daru piyega toh sab kuch yaad aa jayega…”

“tune mujhe dhoondha kaise…”

“tera number off aa raha tha toh Nisha ko call kiya tha maine…usi ne bataya ki tu yaha hai…le us-se baat kar le…pareshan hai bahut…”Nisha ko call lagakar mobile mere hath me dekar Varun bola

“kaun Nisha…”

Jiske baad ek baar phhir Varun mujhe aise dekhne laga jaise maine apna lund uske hath me de diya ho…yani ki full hairan…pareshan…aur abki baar Varun ko meri taraf aise dekh main samajh gaya ki…main hee kuch gadbad kar raha hoon…warna Varun mujhe aise gusse se nahi dekhta…maine apnai aankhe band ki aur jor se apna sar hilaya….

“Nisha…..Nisha…Ni+Sha….Ni= Nickel…S= Sulphur…acha Nisha…Desai ji ki laundi…abey use kyun call karwa raha hai…thodi der pahle tu yaha rahta toh dekhta kaise bhav kha rahi thi…goodbye bolkar gayi mere ko…ek baat bolu Varun…mujhe lagta hai ki wo na koyi kala jadu karti hai…dekhta nahi kaise ajeeb bartaav karne laga hoon main aajkal…tu naa…us-se baat-vaat mat kiya kar….”kahte hue maine call disconnect kar di…. “acha ye bata…mera mail check kiya kya…interview ka result aa gaya hoga…”

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Maine park se room tak ka trajectory set kiya lekin phhir laga ki Varun udte waqt air friction nahi jhel payega…isliye maine trajectory cancel ki aur aisich paidal hee room ki taraf chalne laga…room jate waqt sadak par mujhe Bisleri dikhayi diya,jo ki apne kuch dosto ke sath race laga raha tha….Bisleri ko samne se apni taraf daudta dekh main ekdum se uske samne aa gaya aur use rok liya…

“kyun be lawde…kaha ghoom raha hai…in awara kutto ke sath…”Bisleri ka kaan pakad kar main bola…jiske jawab me Bisleri ku-ku karke kikiyane laga…wo kabhi apni jeebh nikal kar apna muh chat-ta toh kabhi apni pooch hilate hue kikiyata …jisase main samajh gaya ki lawda use meri baton me koyi dilchaspi nahi hai…use toh bas chakna chahiye….

“sale kutte tak matlabi hai…that’s why I hate everyone…”Bisleri ka kaan pakad kar ghumate hue bola “Varun yadi tu bole toh…”

“nahi…”beech me hee meri baat katkar Varun ne kaha

“sun toh le…”

“bilkul nahi…tu chahta hai ki main is kutte ko apne sath lekar chalu…apne room me rahne du…toh mera jawab hai nahi…bilkul nahi…”

“ek aur baar soch kar dekh…”

“bola na nahi…BC kitna ganda hai ye…muh dekh lagta hai abhi-abhi kisi nali me muh marker aaya hai…aur tu thoda door rah is-se…iske daant kitne bade-bade hai…kaat lega tujhe…”

“ye mujhe nahi kaatega…”

“kyun”

“aakhir isne mera daru piya hai………..aur chakna bhi…”

“dekh Arman…tujhe chalna hai toh chal…ise toh main apne sath nahi le jane wala…”

“khali laundiyo par pyar dikhao tum log…chhote log  chal Bisleri…tu nikal ab…4 baje milte hai park me…”

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Bisleri se vida lekar main room pahucha aur room jaate hee sabse pahle mootne gaya….
“maja aa gaya baincho…bahut der se lagi thi…”bathroom se bahar aate hue main khud se bola aur apna mail check kiya….

“tumhari maa ka 9.8, isiliye main kahi aaply nahi karta…”
 

Chapter-3 : The Mysterious Dream


“kya hua Arman…. ”

“maine abhi just apna mail check kiya….”

“oh…ab samjha….reject kar diya, it happens bro”

“reject…reject nahi kiya be…reject…abey pagal hai kya…reject kyun karenge….accept kar liya mujhe…”

“toh phhir kyun itna chilla raha hai..”

“lawda kal ki joining date de ke rakhi hai…khamkha Nagpur ka address dal diya…kahi aur ka dalta toh ek week ka aaram toh dete…”

“arey wo sab chhod na…tujhe toh khush hona chahiye….yaaaaaaa…..party”

“ye sale….chhote log”Varun ki taraf hath dikhate hue maine kaha…
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Job ka pahla din…aur logo ki ray li jaye toh wo kahenge ki time pe jana…formal dress pahan kar jana…shoes ache se polish hona chahiye…office me apna chehra khushal rakhna aur sabse ache se baat karna…khaskar ke ladies se….yadi aap salah lene jaoge…chahe online ya offline…toh bahut se salah milenge...kuch toh ye bhi kahenge ki naha kar jana…BC ye bhi koyi salah hai….ki naha kar jaana….par mujhe salah nahi sahyog chahiye…aur yakin mano toh mujhe aise hee laparjhandis pasand hai…main jis company me kaam karne ja raha tha uska name kafi lamba chauda tha…Sharda Machine Tools & Parts Design Limited 

Par phhir maine socha ki kaun baar-baar itna lamba naam lega toh maine company ka name Sharda Vihar rakh diya…Sharda Vihar isliye kyunki mere school ka yahich name tha…

“congrats Arman ,tune toh bahut lamba teer mar diya…par tu ab tak taiyar nahi hua…”Varun ne mujhse pucha…

“itni fikar hai toh tu chala ja meri jagah…”kahte hue maine apna mobile uthaya aur apna mood normal karne ke liye video dekhne laga…

“pahle din hee late Jakar galat impression dalega apne boss par…”

“bhad me gaya boss…sala takla…”

“tujhe kaise pata ki tera boss takla hai…”

“guess kiya..aur lavde ab tu chup rahe toh ekat gana sun loon…”

“main ja raha hoon…jate samay room lock karke jana…kal ki tarah khula mat chhod jana…”

“get out…”

Aur phhir maine wo kiya jo mujhe nahi karna chahiye tha…maine marte dum tak mobile me video dekha aur phhir bistar par hee mar gaya…marne se mera tatparya hai neend…aur neend me maine ek sapna dekha jisme main aur Nisha kitni khushi se apni zindagi gujar basar kar rahe the…us sapne me mere paas wo sab kuch tha jiski mujhe zaroorat thi…jiski mujhe chah thi aur sabse badi baat ki us sapne me main bahut khush tha…pata nahi kaise par main khush tha…bahut khush…jaise ki Nisha hee meri zindagi ho…aur yaha par khushi se mera matlab hai khushi…par us sapne ke aakhiri chand lamho me kuch thik nahi hua…kyunki is sapne ka ant ek khoon se hua tha…aur wo khoon maine kiya tha..par ye kaise mumkin hai…bhala main kisi ka khoon kyun karunga…wo bhi revolver se..?
neend se jagne ke baad maine apna mobile uthaya aur Nisha ko ek sorry wala messege bhej kar M.B.D. Restaurant me milne ke liye bulaya…main jab se mar kar zinda hua tha tab se Nisha ke bare soch raha tha aur jaise-jaise main uske bare me sochta mujhe ahsaas ho raha tha ki wo kitni khoobsurat…kitni ameer hai…aur yadi koyi meri zindagi badal sakti hai toh wo sirf Nisha hai…

“I love you ,Nisha”khud se kahte hue maine ek aur messege Nisha ko tapka diya jisme maine 2 ghante baad na milne ko bolkar bas aadhe ghante ke baad milne ko kaha tha...
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“aakhir tumne mujhe bulaya kyun…maine toh kal park me hee goodbye kah diya tha…bahut insult kar chuke tum mere parents ki…mere friends ki aur meri…”MBD ke andar jate hue Nisha ne kaha aur wahi gate ke paas rook gayi

“hat pagli,ise insult thode hee kahte hai…ye toh mera pyar hai tere parents ke liye…aur teri un sexy,hot ,glamorous,smart,beautiful saheliyo ke liye aur waise bhi aadmi bezzati usi ki karta hai jiski wo izzat karta hai…”apni shirt ki jeb tatolte hue maine kaha aur mera itna kahna hee tha ki Nisha MBD restaurant ke gate se hee wapas mud gayi….

“wait…wait..”daudkar Nisha ke samne aate hue maine kaha “tum mujhe pyar karti ho aur main bhi shayad tumhe pyar karta hoon…toh kya tumhe nahi lagta ki hum dono ko yahi par karna chahiye….”

“kya..sex ?”

“nahi,pyar ka izhar….wo jaise filmo me karte hai na ki…ladka,ladki ko gulab ka phool deta hai toh ladki khushi ke mare apne dono hath apne galo par rakhkar mar jati hai…”

“kyaaaaaa…”

“sorry…sorry…wo toh aise hee flow-flow me nikal gaya…toh main kaha tha…haan… wo jaise filmo me karte hai na ki…ladka,ladki ko gulab ka phool deta hai toh ladki khushi ke mare apne dono hath apne galo par rakhkar thoda sa smile karte hue haan kah deti hai…phhir dono wahi kiss karte hai aur phhir ek gana chalta hai…jiski ending ladka/ladki ke ghar me sex scene se khatm hoti hai…”

“toh ?”

“toh shuru kare…”

“tumne kaha ki..tum mujhe pyar karti ho aur main bhi shayad tumhe pyar karta hoon…shayad ?”

“shayad se mera matlab hai 100 % confirm…you know it’s apun’s language…”

“hmm…”mere taraf dekhte hue Nisha boli aur finally uske chehre par halki-halki wo muskan aane lagi…jise maine shayad sadiyo se nahi dekha tha..

“kal raat bhi tum aise hee smile kar rahi thi…”

“kal raat…? Kal raat kab…”

“kal raat nahi…aaj din me..yahi kuch…52-53 minutes pahle…”apni ghadi me time dekhte hue main bola “maine ek sapna dekha tha…jisme main aur tum ek ghar me the…jo tumhare ghar jitna toh bada nahi tha…par bada tha…suraj ki good morning wali kirne khidki aur darwaje se pure ghar me faili hui thi aur unhi kirno me se gujarte hue main ghar se bahar aa raha tha ki tabhi kisi ne mera name lekar pukara…aur wo aawaz sunkar main muskuraya ,main bahut khush hua…ekdum achanak se…lekin kyun…aur jab main iska reason jan-ne ke liye peechhe palta toh dekha ki tum kuch doori par mere peechhe khadi ho ,smile marte hue…halki si…yahi kuch 1-2 centimeres tumhare honth khule hue the…thik aisi jaisi abhi kar rahi ho.hum dono bahut khush the aur aisa lag raha tha jaise bas yahi meri life ka the end hai…mere andar wo sukoon tha jise main apni puri zindagi dhoondata raha aur kamal ki baat hai ki ,wo tum thi…blue colour ke kisi short dress me…lekin phhir achanak tumhe kisi ne bulaya…waha par sirf hum dono the lekin wo aawaz meri nahi thi…wo toh us ghar ke kisi hisse se aayi thi..kisi aadmi ki aawaz ya aurat ki…mujhe thik se yaad nahi..par waha par koyi teesara tha aur usi ne wo aawaz tumhe di thi…aur phhir tum achanak se ghabra gayi….jiske baad phhir…”

“ phhir…”

“ phhir…”

“are aage bologe bhi…”

“phhir maine tumhe goli mar di…pata nahi kyun…par ,maine aisa hee kiya…jiska mujhe koyi pachhtawa bhi nahi tha”bolte hue main apne pant ke jeb me kuch dhoondhane laga “sala gulab ka phool ,jo maine bagal wale ke flat se churaya tha…kaha gir gaya”

“ye tum kya nikal rahe ho…”thoda peechhe hat-te hue Nisha puchhi…

“revolver nikal raha hoon,taaki tujhe shoot karke sapna sach kar saku… tumhare liye ek gift laya tha,wahi dhoondh raha hoon…”

“gift…”apne aankhe badi karte hue Nisha wapas mere karib aayi…

“khush toh aise ho rahi hai,jaise main ise Kohinoor condom matlab Kohinoor diamond de dunga…badi mushkil se ek gulab ka phhol chori kiya tha…wo bhi kahi gir gaya…ab ise kya bolunga…kahi phhir se iska mood kharab na ho jaye…ek kaam karta hoon ,next pocket me jo bhi chiz hogi wahi gift bolkar ise pakda deta hoon…baad me justify kar dunga ki wo chiz badi anmol hai….yesss…”sochte hue maine apne pant ki next pocket me hath dala aur jo chiz mere pakad me aayi wo nikal kar maine Nisha ko de di…

“ek kora kagaz…Arman,ye kaisa gift hai…isme toh kuch likha bhi nahi hai”

“kyun tumhe pasand nahi aaya…A-4 size ka kagaz hai..”

“toh ? ye bhi koyi gift hai..”

“tujhe ek A-4 size kore kagaz ki ahmiyat nahi maloom…kitna costly gift hai ye..”
“prove it”

“ye ek A-4 size ka blank paper hai.. jisme main aptitude ke 60 questions solve kar sakta hoon aur wo 60 question kisi bhi exam me kisi bhi shaks ko naukari dilwa sakte hai…ab chal maan le ki us aadmi ki monthly income 30k hai toh us hisab se uski annual income hui 360k aur wo minimum 30 saal tak bhi naukari kare toh uski income hogi yahi kuch……..10.8 Million…aur ye sab kuch hoga sirf is A-4 size ke kore kagaz se…aur mujhe nahi lagta ki aaj tak tumhe kisi ne 10.8 Million  ka gift bhi diya hoga…. That’s Shri Arman for you……bitches”

“itna costly gift…wow”

“worth over 10.8 Million rupees”

“thank you…so what’s next”us kore kagaz ko apne purse me rakhte hue wo boli..

“pahle kiss aur phhir sex…aur phhir sex aur phhir ek aur bar sex…”

“shut up”

“nahi..”

“no…”

“teen baar nahi toh chalo acha do baar…do baar bhi nahi…chalo koyi baat nahi…ab kya…ab aise kyun dekh rahi ho…ek baar bhi nahi...”

“hum yaha kya sex karne aaye the…”

“actually maine yaha tumhe apna sapna sunane ke liye bulaya tha aur…aur…ye kal park me jo hua …matlab jo hua,lekin nahi hona chahiye tha…lekin phhir bhi hua…jiska mujhe behad afsos toh hai lekin utna bhi nahi jitna tum soch rahi ho…toh maine socha ki kyun na tumhe jakar…….”bolte hue main ruk gaya…

“sorry bolna chahte ho…”

“kamal hai,main kab se yahi kahna chah raha tha…par mujhe ye word hee nahi soojh raha tha…par dekho tumhi ne sorry bol diya…chalo maine maaf kiya…tum bhi kya yaad rakhogi ki kis…”

“yugpursh se tumhara pala pada tha…”

“Nisha , seriously ab main tumhe (5 x 15) % pyar karne laga hoon…aur mera aisa mannna hai ki is percentage ko aur badhane ke liye hume sex karna chahiye…”ungali se ishara karte hue main bola “by the way ,Nice boobs…last time thoda chhote the shayad…tum kaho toh…”

“Arman, main ab chalti hoon…bahut time ho gaya hai…aur mere bachpan ka friend David bhi aaj hee Nagpur aaya hai toh…mujhe uske sath movie bhi dekhne jana hai…idea ,tum bhi mere sath chalo…bahut maza aayega…”

“bhad me gaya David…chalo restaurant ke andar coffee peete hai…”kahte hue maine Nisha ka hath pakda aur restaurant ki taraf badha…

“Armaan…hath chhodo…pagal ho kya…main tumse baad me milti hoon…abhi mujhe sach me late ho raha hai”apna hath chhudakar Nisha boli… “main toh aati bhi nahi, par tumne itna jor diya toh aa gayi…”

“it’s Arman…A-R-M-A-N not A-R-M-A-A-N….mujhe gussa aata hai jab koyi mera name galat pronounce karta hai to…ab chal…chal coffee peete hai…aaj main acha hoon ,kal pata nahi kaisa rahunga …isliye main aaj ka apna pura time tere sath bitana chahta hoon…”kahte hue maine wapas Nisha ka hath pakda aur restaurant ke gate ki taraf badha….

“ye kya kar rahe ho Arman…”jhatke se apna hath chhudate hue Nisha boli “tum thik toh ho…yaha kayi log mujhe jante hai aur tum mere sath aisa behave kar rahe ho…Arman main apne family ke sath rahti hoon tumhari tarah akeli nahi…jo pura waqt tumhare sath bita doon…aur jab main bol rahi hoon ki David jo ki mera bestfriend hai uske sath main movie dekhne ja rahi hoon toh…tum baat ko samajh kyun nahi rahe…”

“main nahi samajh raha ? tujhse milne ke liye maine office ka pahla din miss kar diya…aur tu ek movie miss nahi kar sakti…wo bhi kisi tuchiye friend ke sath…dekh ab mera mood kharab mat kar aur chal…”

“main ghar ja rahi hoon…”

Itna bolkar Nisha palti aur waha se chal di…Nisha ko waha se jata dekh mera mann kiya abhi uska hath pakdu aur khichkar do-teen tamacha uske gaal par jama doon aur bolu ki tu meri rakhail hai…toh rakhail ki tarah rah….warna wo haal karunga ki movie dekhna toh door movie ka name bhi lene se daregi…lekin main toh is sadi ka sabse mahan vyakti hoon aur yadi main aisa karunga toh mere fans kya sochenge aur bas apne fans ke liye…sirf aur sirf apne fans ke liye main apna gussa pee gaya…

“Arman doesn’t need anyone…main khud do cup coffee order karunga aur khud piyunga…I hate Nisha…I hate her gay father and her lesbo mother …I hate her hijda friend David…I hate that flop movie and its fucking, flop, faggot actors,directors and producers….i…i…just hate everyone ”aur isi ke sath maine MBD restaurant me entry mari…


.
Restaurant ke andar aane ke baad main bahut der tak khamosh baitha raha aur kuch bhi order nahi kiya..approximately 15 minutes tak…aur haqiqat me 14 minutes 6 seconds tak..jiske baad ek waiter waha aaya…

“kya lenge sir aap…”

“teri maa ki choot…dega kya…”

What a reply! Lekin afsos ki baat ki main use ye kah nahi paya kyunki yadi main ye kahta toh anjaam bahut bura hota…aur us-se bhi bura ye hota ki is tarah main Nisha ka gussa us waiter par utarta jise main janta tak nahi…aur in do chizo ne mujhe aisa karne se rok liya…kyunki ye mere siddhantoke sakht khilaf tha…kyunki main apna gussa usi par utarta hoon jo uske layak hai…jo uska karan hai.aur wo waiter uska karan nahi tha….

“thodi der baad aao…”maine kaha…

Nisha toh chali gayi thi,lekin uske jane ka asar mere dil…dimag…lund har jagah ho raha tha…upar se wo sapna…jo mujhe abhi bhi puri tarah yaad tha. Nisha kitni sundar dikh rahi thi us sapne me…par shayad wo sapna…sapna hee rahega nahi toh Nisha mere sath abhi mere samne baithi hoti…par maine use sapne me mara kyun…kya pata, waise bhi aajkal mera system hang maar raha hai…par mujhe yakin nahi hota ki Nisha ne mere sath coffee peene ke bajay us David ke sath movie dekhna choose kiya..jo kisi bhi lihaz se thik nahi tha…kyunki jaha Nisha ab mall me 3 se 4 ghante waste karegi wahi mere sath sirf aadhe ghante me uska kaam tamam ho jata aur baki bache time me hum sex kar sakte the…jaha Nisha ab movie dekhne me hazar  barbaad karegi wahi mere sath ye aakda hazar bata dus rahta…upar se kaha main aur kaha wo jhat ka baal David…matlab economically aur emotionally ,dono taraf se Nisha ka David ke sath jaane ka faisala galat tha.par usne aisa kyun kiya ?…kahi aisa toh nahi ki uske aur David ke beech kuch chal raha hai ? kahi aisa toh nahi ki Nisha mujhe dhokha de rahi hai ? kahi aisa toh nahi ki do-char din baad Nisha mere paas aayegi aur bolegi ki 

“Arman…meri shadi David ke sath ho rahi hai aur main ab tumse nahi mil sakti”
 

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Chapter-4 : Tempus Itinerantur - 2

“sir…aapka order…”

Is aawaz ne meri ekagrata todi aur maine aawaz ki taraf apna rookh kiya aur paya ki abki baar ek ladki mera order lene aayi thi…

“sir..aap kya order karna chahenge…”apna question repeat marte hue us waitress ne ek aur baar mujhse pucha

“teri gand…tel laga ke…degi kya”

Again…what a reply ! aur ek baar phhir se afsos ki main ye kah nahi paya…reason wahi purana wala ki…kisi aur ka gussa kisi aur par kyun utaru…

“do cup coffee…100  wali”

“sir, us range me humare paas koyi coffee nahi hai…”

“dhat teri ki…Shri Arman ne kis restaurant ka address de diya…ek kaam karo tumhe jo pasand hai wo wali coffee le aao…lekin do…”

“okay…koyi aur bhi aa raha hai kya…”

“kyun…nahi bataunga toh nahi degi kyaa…tujhe kya matlab hai ki kaun aa raha hai…kahi tu Nisha ki friend toh nahi hai ,jo mera Mazak uda rahi hai…”

“nahi sir, mai toh bas aise hee puch rahi thi ,kyunki aapne do cup coffee order kiya isliye…”

“control…control…gussa bacha ke rakh”sochte hue maine khud par kabu kiya aur phhir waitress ki taraf muskurate hue dekhkar bola “ek cup tumhare liye…ek cup mere liye…hmm”
.
Coffee peete-peete maine decide kiya ki ab main Nisha ke bare me aur nahi sochunga aur apne is decision ko sahi karne ke liye main waha aas paas baithe logo ko dekhne laga aur kuch der tak kayi logo ko dekhne ke baad meri nazar ek table par rook gayi, jaha ek family baithi hui thi...ek mard…ek aurat aur unke do ladke…thik usi tarah jaise meri family thi…hum bhi aksar aise restaurants ya hotels me jaaya karte the….lekin us din ki meri aur Vipin bhaiya ki ladayi ne sab kuch badal diya tha…mujhe yaad nahi aata ki us ladayi ke baad main kabhi apne family ke sath kisi restaurant me gaya bhi hoon ya nahi tab main samajh jata hoon ki us din ki ladayi ne sab kuch badal diya tha….main aur Vipin bhaiya , hum dono ek hee school me padhte the…isliye aksar hum dono school me ek-dusare ke kiye kand ka ghar me bakhoobi bayan karte the…dar-asal hum dono aksar isi talaash me rahte the ki kab hum dono me se koyi aisi galti kare jise ghar me batane se samne wale ko daant pade ya maar pade…

“Arman…ab teri koyi shikayat nahi aani chahiye…”school jate waqt mere papa ne mujhse kaha “aur ab tu Varun ke sath bilkul nahi ghoomega…wahi tujhe bigad raha hai…”

“kaun Varun…wo toh sharif hai papa…use bigad toh main raha hoon…”kahte hue maine apna school bag kandhe pe latkaya aur aaine me dekh kar apna hairstyle thik kiya… (“lawda, isiliye baal nahi katwata main…baal set hee nahi ho raha”)

“maine bol diya na ki tu Varun ke sath nahi rahega…bas baat khatm…”

“ok…”kahte hue maine ek aur baar apna baal set kiya aur bus-stand ki taraf chal diya jaha mera khas dost Varun mera intezar kar raha tha….

.

“aur launde…sar kaisa hai…suna hai ki tera bhai tere sath taala fek khel raha tha”bus stand me meri taraf aate hue Varun bola “waise is saal class me do-char nayi maal aayi hai…”

“maal ko hata side…aur jo cigarette tune last time pilayi thi wo wali laa aur do lana…aaj do cigarette ek sath piyunga…ek left side me daba ke aur ek right side me daba ke…”

“ek beech me bhi aa jayega…”

“ Arman se mazak karta hai, nalayak…chal jakar cigarette la”

“Marlboro…”

“jo bhi ho…idk…”

“idk…?”

“I don’t know ...chutiye”

“marlboro ka toh packet hai mere paas…tu do pee…chahe char pee…”

“pura packet ?….acha beta ab samjha ….Reema ke sath apna jugad jamvane ke liye tu meri sewa me malarboro…sorry,marlboro ka packet lekar baitha hai”

“are yar, tu bhai hai mera…tere liye toh Marlboro ka packet kya, mera reebok ka naya bat bhi kurbaan…”

“kaha tak baat pahuchayi tune…”

“bas jaisa tune kaha tha…uske according maine teri math ki notebook pe apna name likhkar use de diya hai…”

“good…dobara kab gaya uske baad…uske paas”

“tune uske baad kuch kaha nahi toh maine bhi kuch nahi kaha…aur phhir tera sar wala kand…vagerah-vagerah…”

“aaj half time me samosa khilayega toh main teri setting aage badhau…”

“haan na bhai…’’

“chal phhir done…aaj Reema ko jakar bolna ki kahi use kisi theorem me doubt toh nahi…phhir wo bolegi haan,toh tu doubt clear kar dena…”kash marte hue main bola

“yaar .ye dhue ka chhalla kaise banate hai log…main toh try kar-kar ke thak gaya…sala banta hee nahi…Varun tujhe aata hai kya…”

“abbey yar…math me toh Reema se jyada meri fat-ti hai aur tune use apne usi subject ka notes de diya…ab uska doubt main kaise clear kar paunga…”mere muh se cigarette nikal kar Varun bola “yadi tune science…social science…subject ke notes diye hote toh shayad main kuch shekhi jhad bhi deta…english…meri English tez hai…english hee de deta…kaha math subject de diya yar…lagta hai tu chahta hee nahi ki Reema mere se set ho…”

“beta…uski English tujhse jyada tez hai aur science aur social science wo rat dalti hai…isliye inme toh wo tujhe ghas bhi nahi dalne wali toh dil dalne ki baat toh door hee hai… wo kya hai na ki loda aur hathoda bina dekhe nahi mara jata…aur math ki tension chhod main tujhe do-teen toughest theorem explain kar dunga aur tu kisi movie ke dialogue ke maafiq yaad karke uske samne bol dona….”cigarette ka ek lamba kash marker main bola “tu itna nervous kyun ho jata hai aksar…”

“kahi beech me bhool gaya toh ?”

“yaha main italian songs ke lyrics yaad karne ki soch raha hoon aur tu hindi me theorem yaad nahi kar sakta…tum sale ,chhote log”

“chal bas aa gayi...”

“bas…ya bus ? teri English toh sachmuch kafi strong hai…kaha se seekhi…Lundan university se”
.
“sir ,aapka bill…”

“hmm…thodi der baad aate toh kya main paise nahi deta…khair jaane do…tumhari bhi kaun si galti hai”

Bill pay karne ke baad main waha se utha aur MBD se bahar aa gaya…Pahle mujhe lagta tha ki main dohri zindagi jee raha hoon…ek college ki aur ek aaj ki…lekin pichhale kuch dino se mujhe school life ke bhi kuch scene dikhne lage hai…pata nahi kyun,par mujhe lagta hai jaise mera aaj ,mera aaj nahi hai…jaise ki main ye sab kuch pahle bhi kar chuka hoon…jaise ki main Nisha se ek saal pahle nahi balki kayi salo pahle mila hoon..aur sach batau toh mujhe ab bhi yakin nahi hota ki 8th semester khatm ho chuka hai…mujhe aisa lagta hai jaise ki ye sab ek sapna hai…jaise ki main samay ke kisi antarjaal me fasa hua hoon aur wahi gote laga raha hoon par ek din meri neend tootegi aur main khud ko college me paunga…kahne ka matlab hai ki mujhe mera present…past lagta hai aur past ,future……confused ? well ,I’m too…aakhir tihari zindagi jeene ka kuch toh nuksan hoga hee…
----------------------------------------------------------
School life - Arman Version 1.0
College life - Arman Version 2.0
After college- Arman Version 3.0
Ye terminology yaad kar lo, future me kaam aayegi  Good Night

 

Chapter-5 : Sharda Enterprises

“hello...”baye kaan se mobile satate hue maine jawab diya

“ji..kya meri Arman ji se baat ho rahi hai”kisi ladki ki aawaz ne dusari taraf se mera name pukara toh mujhe laga ki meri koyi lady fan hai…

“nahi…mera matlab haan…”mobile ko baaye kaan se daye kaan me shift karte hue maine bola….

“Arman ji,main Sharda Enterprise se call kar rahi hoon…aaj aapki joining date thi aur aapko mail kiye gaye call letter me humne saaf-saaf likha tha ki aaj ki date me aapko join karna hee hai…company koyi delay bardasht nahi karegi…am I right Mr. Arman…”

“hundred percent…”

“aur aapne aaj join nahi kiya…is-se hume yahi maloom hota hai ki company ke rules aur regulation ki aapko koyi parwah nahi…”

“mom…I mean , mam…actually baat ye hai ki ,parso girlfriend ke sath mera jhagda ho gaya tha toh maine socha ki kyun na use aaj date pe le jaun…mujhe ye khayal bhi aaya ki aaj toh mujhe company join karni hai…aur phhir maine socha…bahut socha…. toh samajh me aaya ki joining date delay ki ja sakti hai…main kal join kar lunga aur aap chahe toh main kal 20 ghante kaam karne ko taiyar hoon…aap chahe toh mujhe punish karne ke liye mere one week ki salary bhi kaat sakte hai…main mind nahi karunga…par sach manniye…meri girlfriend ko mannana jyada zaroori tha…hello…hello…………hellllllo…heeeello……….hellooooo…..phone cut gaya kya…hello,janemann…bura maan gayi kya…tum chaho toh tumhe bhi date par le ja sakta hoon…ab toh reply de, ya lawda ghusau toh hee mannegi…lagta hai lawdi ne call disconnect kar di…gand maraye…talented launda hoon main…”


Maine jeb me ek cigarette sulgaya….matlab jeb me hee cigarette sulgaya…yani ki maine shirt ki jeb me hee cigarette sulgaya yani ki jeb ke andar cigarette sulgaya aur machis ki tilli jeb me hee fek di aur jaise hee mobile jeb me rakhne laga toh kisi ne mujhe call kiya lekin tabhi mujhe kuch bahut bura sa mahsoos hua…mujhe aisa laga jaise ki bata nahi sakta ki kaisa laga… aur jab meri nazar mere shirt ke jeb par gayi toh maine dekha ki waha se dhua nikal raha tha aur mere dekhte hee dekhte mere wo dhua aag ki chhoti-chhoti…nanhi-nanhi…pyari-pyari lapto me tabdil ho gaya

“iski maa ka…”

Maine mobile ek taraf feka aur apne doo hatho se shirt ki jeb me lage aag ko bujhane laga…jisme mujhe kuch hee seconds hee lage…lekin jab tak maine wo aag bujhayi meri wo shirt kharab ho chuki thi aur upar se mere seene ke paas ki thodi si chamdi bhi jal gayi thi…actually jaIi nahi thi bas kala sa nishan aa gaya tha aur jalan mahsoos ho raha tha…

“aur maro beta stunt…jal gaya na dil,ab kaun bharega iska bill….bill se yaad aaya mera mobile phone…”

Maine zamin se mobile phone uthaya aur ye dekhne laga ki call kiski thi…“Nisha call kar reli thi..par kyun…zaroor mujhse mafi magni hogi…rahne do…bahut uchak rahi thi…lekin kya ye sahi rahega…call kar hee leta hoon .afterall har kisi ka dil mere dil ki tarah bada nahi hota…”kahte hue maine Nisha ka number dial kiya….

“Arman…mujhe laga ki tum mera call hee receive nahi karoge…lekin dekho tumne toh return call bhi kar diya…”call uthate hee Nisha boli “kaash ki tum bhi mere sath aaye hote…main…David aur Shipra bahut enjoy kar rahe hai…yadi tum aaye hote toh tumhe bhi bahut maza aaya hota…”

“kya yahi batane ke liye mujhe call kiya tha…”apne jale hue seene aur shirt ko simultaneously sahlate hue maine puchha…

“I’m sorry ,Arman…ki maine tumhare sath thoda rude behave kiya…”

“thoda ?”

“actually , sach kahu toh sorry tumhe bolna chahiye,par tum toh sorry bolne se rahe toh maine socha ki main hee bol doon…I apologize”

“apology accepted…ouch..”

“kya hua Arman…”

“kuch nahi bas tumhare gham me apna dil jala raha hoon…”

“ok…bye…Arman. Shipra mujhe bula rahi hai…abhi hum horror house me jaane wale hai…”

“Shipra bhi hai…aaj kitne ka popcorn chaba gayi wo…”

“shut up,Arman…ok bye…”

“byyyeee….aish karo baap ke paiso par…I hope ki usne last line nahi suni hogi…Sali, KAPD(khade Armano par dhokha) karke sorry bolne ka natak karti hai….i just everyone……………hate…..”

.

Sach kahu toh kabhi-kabhi mujhe nafrat hoti hai un logo se jo mere aas-paas hai…main thak gaya hoon wahi life roj jeete hue…roj unhi jaane pahchane logo ko dekhna, unse milna aur ye dikhawa karna ki main kitna khush hoon…jo ki main nahi hoon…main thak gaya hoon har roj Varun ko dekhkar…har roj Nisha ko dekhkar…lekin ye baaten main unhe nahi bata sakta kyunki mujhe maloom hai ki wo mujhe nahi samajh payenge…matlab kya fayda aisi zindagi ka jisme ek saal tak sirf do logo ka chehra dekhna pade…sirf do logo se hee baat karna pade…isiliye jab kabhi bychance main kisi teesare vyakti se milta hoon toh mujhe aisa ahsaas hota hai jaise main insaan nahi balki koyi alien hoon ya phhir mujhe prithvi ke kisi nayi jaati ke samne lakar khada kar diya gaya ho…aur phhir log chahte hai ki main unse normal behave karu,lekin hota iske thik ulat hai…darasal main ye kahna chahta hoon main logo ke sath jaanbuchkar waisa bartav nahi karta, jaisa ki main karta hoon…wo toh bas apne aap ho jata hai…upar se bahut kam sone ki vazah se aajkal main thoda chidchida bhi rahta hoon…isliye jab bhi koyi jabarpeli ki hoshiyari karta hai toh main uski hoshiyari uske gand me ghused deta hoon…lekin jaha aap kaam karte hai waha aapki personal problems se koyi matlab nahi hota,waha aapko sabhya hee rahna padta hai,phhir chahe aap andar se kitne bhi bade tharki ya sanki kyun na ho…upar se jab aap apne office ke pahle din hee gayab rahe ho toh sabhya rahne ki jimmewari…yani ki jimmedari, thodi badh jati hai aur isi vazah se main agle din white shirt ,black trouser ke sath black tie me dress up hua aur paidal hee office ke liye nikal pada…pahle toh maine socha ki Varun ki car ya bike me se kuch utha loon ,lekin phhir mujhe khayal aaya ki yadi main auto se jata hoon toh auto me mujhe maal mil sakti hai,jinke sath seat share karte waqt unke shareer ke kuch private part mere shareer ke kuch parts se takrayenge…halaki iski probability 50 % thi, ya phhir usase bhi kam…lekin phhir bhi maine auto se jaane ka hee decision liya aur samne se aa rahe ek autowale ko hath dikhaya…

Autowale ne mujhe dekhkar jaha mai khada tha us-se se thodi door aage me auto roka aur apne muh ka gutkha thook kar bola “kaha…”

“sharda enterprise…”kahte hue maine auto ke andar nazar ghumayi “bc ek bhi maal nahi,yaha toh sab buddhi baithi hui hai…”

“25 lagega…”

“5  me chalna hai toh bol…main aaj pahli baar sharda enterprice nahi ja raha hoon…mera roj ka aana jana hai…”use talne ke liye maine jaanbuchkar aisa kaha…
Jiske jawab me autowale ne ek aur baar gutkha thooka aur auto ka handle samne ki taraf ghuma kar accelerator marte hue waha se nikal gaya….

“ek aur auto aa raha hai…ummid hai ki isme maal hongi…”ek aur autowale ko samne se aata dekh maine mann me kaha aur hath dekar use rukwaya…

“huhh…kohhaaa…”apna muh upar uthakar usne mujhse aise pucha taki uske muh me bhara gutkha uske muh me hee rahe…

“shordaaa…entorprise…”uski nakal utarte hue main bola…

“30 rupiyaa lagega…”

“30 rupiyaa..”

aur phhir meri nazar andar baithi do ladkiyo par gayi jinke chehra unhone scarf se thak rakhe the…aur unhe dekhte hee main us auto me jaane ke liye raji ho gaya lekin aaj meri kismet kharab nikli kyunki jaha se main baitha tha waha se thoodi doori par hee wo dono ladkiya utar gayi aur phhir pure raste bhar auto me koyi dusari ladki nahi aayi…

sharda enterprises ka head office ek complex ke andar tha…complex ke bahar auto se utarkar maine autowale ko paisa diya aur upar ki taraf dekha…

“sharda complex…toh ye puri building hee sharda vihar walo ki hai…gazab,lawde logo ne acha business bana kar rakha hua hai…”

Pahle Main complex ke andar ghusa aur phhir complex ke andar bane sharda enterprises ke head office me…yaha aane se pahle maine socha tha ki meri pelam-pel insult ki jayegi…lekin jab main andar pahucha toh dekha ki kisi ne mujhe kuch nahi kaha aur ek letter dekar ek office me jane ke liye kaha…

“kamal hai…is letter par toh aaj ki joining date likhi hui hai”khud se baat karte hue main us office ki taraf badha jaha mujhe letter lekar jaane ke liye kaha gaya tha…

“may I come in…”

“who are you…”thoda strict aawaz me ,ek aurat ya phhir kahe ki ek ladki boli…jo ki us office ke main chair par sawar thi…

“I’m Arman…your new designer…I mean, your new machine designer…”thoda nervous hote hue main bola…

“Arman…come in.have a seat…”

“thank you….mam”uske samne ki ek chair par apna pichhwada tikate hue main bola…

“Arman…tumhari joining date kab ki hai…”

“is letter ke according toh aaj hee hai…”apne hath me rakhe letter ko dekhte hue main bola “par actual joining date kal ki thi…”

“toh phhir tumhe mere samne kal hona chahiye tha, aaj nahi…is delay ki koyi vazah…”

“wo main kal……kal isliye nahi aa paya…kyunki”

“kyunki tum apni girlfriend ke sath date par gaye the…am I right Mr.Arman…”

“aapko kaise pata”chauk kar maine pucha aur tab mujhe samajh aaya ki kal phone pe yahi lawdi thi…matlab yahi ladki thi…par is samay mere samne jo aham sawal tha wo ye ki main ise ladki kahu ya phhir aurat…kyunki wo ladki kahlane ke umra se adhik aur aurat kahlane ke umra se chhoti thi…matlab ladki aur aurat ke beech me jo phase hota hai , wo usme thi lekin phhir maine socha ki ise ,iske name se hee pukara jaye…wohi jyada better hai….. “Ms. Vandana Rathi…huh ,ghatiya name ”

“toh kya kal call aapne ne kiya tha…mam”Ms. Rathi ke toblerone nameplate ko dekhte hue maine pucha

“yes…give me your joining letter”

Iske baad Ms..Rathi ne mere letter pe sign kiya aur mujhe wo letter le jakar wahi wapas jama karne ko kaha,jaha se lekar main aaya tha…
Jaisa ki maine pahle bataya hai ki mujhe aksar chidh hoti hai kisi naye vyakti se baat-chit karne me aur yahi haal mera Sharda Vihar me bhi raha ,mujhse milne…mujhe assist karne ke liye do-char log mere paas bhi aaye lekin un sabse maine aisa bartaav kiya jaise ki wo mere office me kaam karne wale worker nahi balki Esha ke boyfriend Gautam ho…aur phhir sham ko 4 baje ke lagbhag mere computer ke bagal me rakha telephone baj utha…

“hello…”

“aadhe ghante pahle tumhare paas maine do files bhijwayi thi,uski report tumne abhi tak nahi di…”

Aawaz sunte hee main samajh gaya tha ki ye Ms. Rathi hai lekin phhir bhi maine pucha ki “kaun” pata nahi kyun par maine aise hee puch liya…

“your manager…”

“Rathi mam… ?”

“puch rahe ho ya bata rahe ho…”

“dono…”

“kya…”

“dono files maine dekh li…ek ko toh nipta bhi diya.i mean first wale ke andar jitney machine tools aur parts the unki design maine check kar li aur jinki dimensions galat thi usko correct karke…correct karke…Yogij…Yogijog…..kya nam hai iska….Yogijogi…Yogi-jogi ko bhej di hai…”

“and what about the second one…”

“I’ll finish it tomorrow….i mean today, at home”

“really…”

“yeah”

“ek file complete karne me tumne aaj ka pura din nikal diya aur yadi tumne dusari wali file ko ghar par complete kiya toh us par puri raat nikal jayegi…”

“ek engineer aur us engineer ki ek raat ki mehnat par kabhi shaq nahi karna chahiye mam…”thoda majakiya lahje me bolte hue maine apni ghadi me time dekha “abhi toh 4 baje hai aur yadi aap chahe toh kal office me aane se pahle tak main ek kya teen files ko check kar sakta hoon…”

“sach me…soch lo.yadi ek baar commitment kar di toh phhir ….”

“don’t worry mam,files bhijwa dijiye…kal aapke aane se pahle teeno files apki table par hongi…”

“ok…as your wish…”bolte hue Ms. Rathi ne phone rakh diya.

“BC ,randi…”

Rolebazi me maine Ms.Rathi ko ye toh bol diya tha ki main ye kar dunga…main wo kar dunga…lekin jab teeno files mere paas aayi aur jab maine unhe dekha toh main samajh gaya ki beta Arman…ab toh tujhe swayam Shri Newton bhi nahi bacha sakte..kyunki har files par taqriban char se panch ghante lagne the yaani ki kul milakar 12 ghante se adhik ka workload toh tha hee...

“kaha jaoge…”Sharda complex ke bahar mujhe khada dekhkar ek autowale ne pucha…

“river view colony…”

“30  lagega…return me koyi sawari nahi milti udhar se….”

Aur phhir maine auto ke andar dekha aur dekhte hee mera mann khil gaya…kyunki andar teen-teen maal baithi thi and guess what….un teeno me se sirf ek ne apna chehra dhak rakha tha…maine turant hami bhari aur auto me baith gaya….auto me main jis ladki ke bagal me baitha tha uski jaangh ka kuch hissa mere jaangh se touch ho raha tha aur kyunki hum char log ek hee seat par baithe the toh bahut hee roughly uski jaangh meri jaangh se ragad rahe the….

“aah ,maza aa gaya…kya tight maal hai”andar hee adar khud ko sabashi dete hue maine kaha

Aur tabhi autowale ne auto rok-kar do aur sawari ko andar bhar liya unme se ek ladka tha toh dusari ladki…wo dono beech ke seat me meri taraf muh karke baith gaye….launda toh badhiya adjust ho gaya…lekin ladki ko adjust hone me thodi dikkat ho rahi thi jiske karan mujhe aur meri sath baithi teen ladkiyo ko thoda aage –pichhe hona pada…par ye mere liye hee faydemand raha kyunki isi dauran do teen baar meri kuhani mere bagal me baithi ladki ki breast ke thoda neeche wale part se takrayi aur ab uski bum ka kuch hissa bhi mujhse roughly touch ho raha tha….jiske karan mera khada ho gaya….auto ke andar ye mahol taqriban dus minutes tak raha aur phhir jo ladki ek launde ke sath abhi-abhi auto me chadhi thi wo thoda tez aawaz me mujhse boli…

“bhaiya ,aap gent hai…aap aage nahi ja sakte kya…”

“nahi ,behan…”

“idiot…mannners nahi hai”badbadate hue usne apna chehra dusari taraf kar liya

Usne aakhiri line boli toh dheere thi lekin maine wo sun li aur aap sab toh mujhe jante hee ho ki main Newton baba ka third law aaply karne me kabhi deri nahi karta matlab ki maine usi intensity aur frequency ki aawaz ,jis intensity aur frequency ke sath wo mujhpar chillayi thi …. main bola…

“ye kahi ka rule hai kya ki ladka hee aage baithne jaye…kya main tere se kam paisa de raha hoon…ya tu koyi rani victoria hai jo main tere khatir aage jaun….tujhe kya lagta hai ki mere mathe par L likha hai aur idiot kisko boli be tu…choose any field ….any topic and any place ,I’ll fuck you in your backyard…”

“ladies se baat karne ki tameej nahi hai kya…”

“wah…tum chaho toh hume idiot…kutta…kamina bol lo….wo sahi hai,lekin jab hum tumhe tumhari language me hee jawab de toh galat hai…mana ki hume sikhaya jata hai ladies aur senior citizens ko seat deni chahiye lekin tu na toh pregnant hai aur na hee senior citizen….jitna paisa tu de rahi hai utna main bhi de raha hoon…yadi aaram tujhe chahiye toh phhir mujhe bhi chahiye…phhir main kyun aage jakar latku….baklol samajh ke rakhi hai kya aur by the way…who the hell are you ? do I even know you ?equality chahiye na tum logo ko toh phhir lo equality…badi aayi tameejdar…aur agali baar kisi ladke ko idiot bolne se pahle hazar baar soch lena kyunki har shaks Arman jitna dayalu nahi hota jo sirf warning dekar chhod dega…now get lost”


Iske baad wo ladki ekdum sann ho gayi aur waha baithi baki teen ladkiya bhi…jise maine abhi batti di thi uska boyfriend bhi sann ho gaya tha… main aamtaur par itna gussa nahi hota hoon balki isase jyada hota hoon ,ye toh kuch bhi nahi hai….mere kam gussa hone ki vazah shayad mera lund tha…jo thodi der pahle jaha aasman ki bulandiyo ko chhu raha tha wahi ab wo patal lok ki surango me kahi gum ho gaya tha…mera matlab ab bhi mere bagal me baithi ladki ka pichhwada mujhse roughly touch ho raha tha lekin mera lund tha ki patal lok se bahar aane ka naam hee nahi le raha tha…

.
“pahli baar tu laptop me movie ya bf dekhne ke aalawa kuch aur kar raha hai…abey ye kya hai itna bhayankar diagram…”mujhe tokte hue Varun bola aur main isi ke sath thoda chauka…

thoda matlab yahi kuch 10-12 %...par main chauka kyunki Varun kab aa gaya iski mujhe bhanak bhi nahi lagi aur wo aakar…hath-muh dhokar…kapde badalkar ,usne jab mere paas aakar mere dwara banaye gaye diagram ko bhayankar kaha tab mera dhyan uspar gaya….kamal hai, is tarah toh koyi room me ghuskar chori bhi kar lega aur mujhe bhanak tak nahi lagegi….

“kaha kho gaya be…”abki bar chutki bajate hue Varun bola….

“kamal hai, main ek bar phhir kho gaya…back to back do baar…mujhe koyi bimari hai kya…pahle toh aisa nahi hota tha…lagta hai mere sixth sence ko repair ki sakht zaroorat hai aur mujhe maloom hai ki ye kaise hoga….Nisha…sex ”

“ab ye saanp ki tarah kya fusfusa kyun raha hai…hua kya tujhe…”abki baar mujhe hilate hue Varun ne kaha…

“this is fucking crazy…BC teesari baar…”

Main abhi back to back teen baar apne hee khayalo me hee kho gaya tha lekin iska matlab ye nahi ki mujhse Varun ne jo kaha mujhe yaad nahi…mujhe yaad hai ki wo mere dwara cad software par banaye gaye gear arrangement ke diagram ko bhayankar bol raha tha….ab kyunki baatchit Varun ne wahi se shuru ki thi ,isliye maine bhi wahi se reply dena shuru kiya….

“mast hai na…maine banaya”

“sach…”

“main kabhi jhooth bolta hoon kya…waise laptop par bf dekhne wali baat se mujhe yaad aaya ki Reema aur tera jhagda solve hua kya…”

“abey uska name Sonam hai…ye Reema kaha se aa gayi”hairan-pareshan hokar Varun ne kaha

“mera matlab wahi tha…jhagda solve hua…”

“nahi…maine use sorry bhi bola lekin wo nahi mani”

“kaisa aadmi hai be tu…mujhe dekh main kaise Nisha ko har baar handle kar leta hoon aur ek tu hai Sonam se hamesha sorry bolta rahta hai….”

“ab har koyi Shri Arman thode hee hota hai, kuch aam insaan bhi hote hai…jaise ki main.waise Sonam lagbhag maan hee gayi hai ,bas uski ek shart hai…”meri taraf ummid bhari nazro se dekhte hue Varun ne kaha…

“ki main us-se sorry bolu…hai na”

“haan…”

“don’t worry…bol dunga…lekin apne style me…”

“sorry matlab ,sorry hee bolega na…ya Shri Arman ke language me sorry ka matlab kuch aur bhi hai…you know, its apun’s language”

“relax…sorry hee bolunga…par mujhe samajh nahi aata ki log mujhse sorry kyun bulwate hai…sorry bolne ke peechhe logo ki ye intention hoti hai ki mujhe maaf kijiye, hum sharminda hai apne kiye par aur yahi vazah hai ki main kisi ko sorry nahi bolta kyunki main kabhi apne kiye par sharminda hota hee nahi aur yadi maine by chance kisi ko sorry bola bhi toh uska matlab ye nahi hota ki main sharminda hoon…balki uska matlab ye hota hai ki…janeman ,abhi toh main tujhe aur sharminda karunga..kyunki main mahan…mera lund mahan”

“toh phhir ,ye tay raha ki tu Reema ko sorry bolega…”

“Reema nahi Sonam…”

“haan…wahi, wahi…Sonam…Sonam main tumhe bhool jaun ye ho nahi sakta aur tum mujhe bhool jao ye main hone nahi dunga…ayyyee…Sonam”

“bas kar be…”

“chal thik hai…toh phhir tu ye apna ye gear chala ,main chala sone…”

“sone , time kya hua hai…”chaukte hue maine Varun se pucha…

“11:45 ”

“oh teri toh…12 baj gaye…mujhe laga ki 7-8 baje honge…aaj tu 12 baje room par aaya yani phhir tu Sonam ke sath kahi bahar gaya tha…”

“good night Arman…”

 

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Chapter-6 : Upheaval
“chal be…”

“bhai ek kaam karna...eyedrop dal de”

“khud dal le”bolkar main wapas lappy me busy ho gaya
Mujhe toh aaj raat bhar jagna hai warna Rathi darling se kiya hua commitment toot jayega…aur waise bhi mujhe kaun sa neend aati hai…kabhi-kabhi toh lagta hai ki mujhe marne ke baad hee neend aayegi,khair usme abhi time hai…

Main raat bhar jaga aur Rathi mam ki di hui teeno files ko salta kar cigarette peete hue morning walk par nikal gaya…waise toh cigarette peena koyi badi baat nahi…jalao, dhua andar lo aur phhir bahar feko…lekin daudte waqt cigarette peena…ye badi baat hai….aur main yahi kar raha tha jiske karan park me mere aas-paas mauzood log mujhe thoda hairani se dekh rahe the…unme se kuch shayad mann me has bhi rahe honge aur kuch toh gali bhi de rahe honge…lekin mujhe kaunsa fark padta hai…main toh bas apne aap me mast cigarette peete hue daud raha tha aur park ke kuch chakkar katne ke baad maine pani ki bottle jisme main beer bharkar laya tha use kholkar peene laga….main tab tak beer peeta raha jab tak main ek saans me pee sakta tha aur phhir ek lambi saans chhodte hue park ki deewar par kood kar baith gaya…

“maza aa gaya, I love beer more than girls…”

“you’re Armaan…hai na”mere samne khade hokar ek shaks ne pucha

“Arman…not Armaaaaaaan…. only single ‘a’ between ‘m’ and ‘n’…samajh me aaya ya paper me likh kar dikhau…”bolte hue maine bottle ka dhakkan khola aur phhir beer peene laga….

Beer peete samay mujhe khayal aaya ki ye mujhse milne aaya hai toh zaroor mujhe janta hee hoga ya phhir mera fan hoga…mujhe ise beer offer karni chahiye…lekin phhir jab mujhe khayal aaya ki ye beer 760 ki hai toh maine apna ye irada badal diya

“I’m David…Nisha’s ”

“brother…”

“friend not brother…”

“kya fark padta hai dono same hee hote hai…Rakshabandhan me bach kar rahna”beer ki dhakkan band karte hue maine mann me kaha “acha hua sale ko beer offer nahi ki…ye toh David hai”

“tumse kuch baat karni thi…tumhare paas time hai…”

Maine apni ghadi me nazar mari aur phhir ghadi ki taraf hee dekhte hue kaha “tumhare paas char sau char…teen…do….ek…. seconds hai…jaldi bolo…”

“phhir kabhi…baat karenge…”achanak apna mood change karte hue David bola“main janta hoon ki tum ye soch rahe hoge ki main tumhe kaise janta hoon ,tumhari photo Nisha ne dikhayi thi aur aaj park me tahalte waqt maine tumhe jogging karte hue dekha toh….”

“chal, be ….kya bore kar raha hai”David ki baat ko unsuna karke main waha se utha aur room ki taraf chal diya….

David se meri koyi anban nahi thi kyunki afterall wo le deke Nisha ke liye uska sirf ek acha dost tha aur Nisha ke bare me main aaj tak jo chiz samajh paya hoon wo ye ki wo meri tarah tharki nahi hai aur wo kisi ke sath bhi kitni raat tak kyun na ghume…chudegi sirf mujhse hee…ye baat alag hai ki last time mujhe uspar thoda shaq hua tha ki kahi wo David se toh set nahi hone wali..par aaj David ko dekhkar main samajh gaya tha ki Nisha use is janam me toh kya agle sau janmo me bhi nahi milegi, Lekin phhir bhi mera bartaav David ke sath kuch acha nahi tha…jiska karan, as you know …ye tha ki mujhe nafrat hai naye logo se baat karne se…mujhe bilkul bhi pasand nahi ki jise main pasand nahi karta wo mere paas aakar mujhse mere ya Nisha ke bare me baat kare….i just…just hate everyone….

“Arman…”mere khayalo me vighn dalte hue ek aawaz mere kano me gunji aur main samajh gaya ki ye aawaz kiski thi…isliye is aawaz ko ansuna karke main room ki taraf aage badhta raha…

“Armaaaan….”ek baar phhir wahich aawaz mere kano ko cheerti hui nikli aur abki baar aawaz thodi tez thi aur thodi tez se mera matlab hai bahut tez….

“Nisha…mujhe room jana hai aur office ka kuch kaam hai usko khatm karna hai, isliye main tumse abhi nahi mil sakta…bye”bina peeche mude aage chalte hue hee main bola ….

“main Nisha nahi Aradhna hoon…”abki baar ye aawaz bahut jyada tez thi…itni tez …jaise kisi ne mere kaan ke paas jor se chillaya ho aur is aawaz ne mere badhte kadmo me jam sa laga diya….mera dil joro se dhadakne laga…hath-pair kanpne lage aur main man hee man me bhagwan se prathna karne laga ki maine jo kuch bhi suna hai…wo sirf mera vaham ho….

Mere andar itni himmat nahi thi ki main peechhe mudkar dekhu…jabki is samay full din ka samay tha…mere kadam aise jam ho gaye the jaise ki kisi ne bediyo se unhe bandh diya ho…matlab main unhe hila toh sakta tha lekin ek kadam bhi aage badhana mere liye doobhar tha…lekin main pura time toh yaha khada nahi rah sakta tha abhi nahi toh kabhi toh mujhe peeche dekhna hee hoga…isliye apni puri himmat jutakar main peechhe palta…par waha koyi nahi tha…

“fuck…ab ye bhi din dekhna padega…pahle toh sirf sapne me hee Aradhna ki aawaz sunayi deti thi ,par aaj toh haqiqat me bhi….ek minute, kahi ye sapna toh nahi…?”

Maine apne aaju baju dekha,sab kuch normal hee tha…main waha ke aas-paas ke environment ko dekha …sab kuch waisa hee tha jaisa ki haqiqat me hota hai…lekin yadi ye haqiqat hai toh phhir Aradhna ki aawaz mujhe kaise sunayi de sakti hai …kahi ye mera vaham toh nahi ya phhir sach me main koyi sapna dekh raha hoon…sapna ya haqiqat….? Ye Sapna hai…..nahi haqiqat…..nahi ye sapna hai…pagal hai kya bosedk, ye haqiqat hai…aur Jab bahut der tak mujhe samajh nahi aaya ki ye ek sapna hai ya haqiqat toh maine apna purana funda istemal kiya…jo main tab istemaal kiya karta tha…jab mere school ka ek marhoom dost mujhe sapne me daraya karta tha…sale ne bahut pareshan karke rakha tha,us-se main jitna dara tha utna toh main 8th Semester ke end me S.P. se nahi dara tha…

.
Main ek ghar ke samne gaya aur us ghar ki boundary par ek mukka marne ka socha kyunki yadi ye sapna hota toh phhir main jaha soya hua hu waha apne hath me uthe dard ke karan uth jata lekin yadi mukka marne ke baad main yahi rahta aur mujhe dard bhi hota toh ye haqiqat hai aur sath me wo aawaz bhi jiske karan main apna hath todne ka risk le raha hoon…maine apne hatheli ko kaskar bandha aur ek jordar punch deewar par mara….

“real hai, BC”dard se hath sahlate hue main cheekha aur hath sahlate hue hee room ki taraf badha…
.

Room pahuchkar maine fridge se barf nikala aur apne hath sekte hue Varun se kaha….

“Varun tu kisi ache doctor ko janta hai kya…matlab waisa doctor jo buddhijiviyo ka ilaaz karta hai…”

“buddhijiviyo se tera matlab mental log ?"

“apparently ”

“Neurologist ?”

“hao yar…abhi-abhi mujhe Aradhna ki aawaz sunayi di…”

“ye tere hath ko kya hua…”

“kuch nahi ,bas experiment kar raha tha deewar par mukka mar kar…tere jaan pahchan me hai kya koyi neurologist”

“dekhna padega”

“dekh lena…”apna laptop on karte hue main bola…aur apne kaam par lag gaya…

“ye bhi complete…ye bhi complete aur ye bhi complete…arey wah ,aaj toh Rathi darling bahut khush hogi…kamal kar diya apun ne…par kamal ki baat ye hai ki main puri raat jaga aur neend ab bhi meri aankho se koso door hai…ek jamhayi tak nahi…bolo Shri Arman ki……Jai”

Rathi mam ki fat ke char ho gayi,jab maine Sharda Vihar pahuchte hee teeno files uske table par fek di toh…matlab jab table par rakh di toh….usne apna spectacle uthaya aur aise muh banakar mujhe dekhne lagi jaise kisi ne uski choot marte waqt unexpectedly lawda uske gand me daal diya ho yani ki full shocked… bas fark itna tha ki Rathi mam ko is samay sirf dard nahi ho raha tha baki pura expression wahi unexpectedly gand me lawda dalne wala tha….

“Yogi se check karwaya….”files dekhte hue Rathi mam ne kaha aur files dekhte waqt wo beech-beech me apne hontho ko apne daanto se chaba rahi thi…jisase main samajh gaya ki Rathi mam ki fat ke char nahi balki aath ho gayi hai….

“bitch please…I’m Arman..Shri Arman”maine mann me kaha

“yogi se check karwaya ?”

“abhi nahi…”

“excellent job….it’s a pleasure to have you, Arman….”files me apni aankhe gadakar Vandana Rathi boli

“thannnkkk…..”bolte-bolte main achanak ruka kyunki files dekhte hue Rathi mam itna kho gayi thi ki wo apne neck ke thoda neeche scratch karne lagi aur main bhi gaur se unke neck ke neeche ke hisse ko dekhne laga….

“abhi iske upar mutth mar du to….maza aa jaye…suppose Arman, ki Rathi mam apna lawda… yani ki tera lawda choos rahi hai…yahi ,abhi…isi cabin me….phhir wo apne trouser ki zib kholte hue peechhe mudkar apni gand teri taraf kar deti hai….”aur mere aisa sochate hee waha ka drishya badalne laga….

maine dekha ki Rathi mam mujhe ungali se ishara karke apne paas bulati hai aur main unke paas jakar unke boobs ko jor-jor se masalne lagta hoon….Rathi mam ka ang-ang unke tight trouser aur shirt se bahar aane ko bekabu ho rahe the aur jor-jor se saans lete hue wo kabhi mere hontho ko chumti toh kabhi mere seene ko aur phhir usne apne hath se mere pant ki zib kholi aur apna hath mere underwear ke andar dalkar mere lund ko masalne lagi….Rathi mam ke mere lund chhune se utpanne uttejana ke karan maine uske sar ke baal ko kheenchkar uske hontho par apni ungaliya firayi aur phhir use neeche jhukakar uska muh apne zib tak le aaya….. meri is harqat par Rathi mam ne muskura kar meri taraf dekha aur mere lund ke bahar wale pant aur underwear ke hisso par apna muh ragadne lagi….maine apne dono hatho se uska sar pakda aur apne pant par ragadne laga….Rathi mam is kadar uttejana ke aagosh me thi ki usne mere pant aur underwear ko chus-chus kar geela kar diya tha aur phhir thodi der baad mere lund ko underwear se bahar nikal kar apni jeebh se halka sa sparsh kiya…..aaahhhh

“Arman….Arman….”

“haaann…yes mam…”sakpaka kar main jaise hosh me aaya aur hosh me aate hee apne zib ke paas apna hath le gaya… “ khayali pulav ” 

“kaha ho mister…kaha kho gaye the…”

“darasal mam main soch raha tha…kya soch raha tha yes… I should use SkyCiv 3D to model and solve complex 3D structures…”

“as your wish…good luck”

“thank you….mam”

.
Aaj ka din mere liye office me thoda boring ho raha tha kyunki aaj mujhe koyi kaam nahi tha…isliye maine mann me Rathi mam ko chodne ke bare me socha…kyunki jo time mila hai uska use toh karna hee chahiye upar se Rathi mam bagal wale kamre me hai toh thodi feeling bhi aayegi aur yadi jyada mann kiya toh bathroom me jakar muthiya mar lunga afterall, jaisa mann…waisa karm…
.

Maine apne shoes utare aur chair peeche khiska-kar dono pair computer wali desk par rakhkar aaram se baitha aur ek lambi saans lekar aankh band ki…waise toh maine ye sab kuch Rathi mam ke liye kiya tha lekin aankh band karne ke baad mera mann sirf Rathi mam ke cabin tak hee pahuch paya tha ki ekdum se mere imagination ka scene hee change ho gaya….jaise kisi androoni taqat ne mere mann ko Rathi mam ke cabin ke bahar se dhar dabocha aur le jakar kisi andheri jagah par patak diya ho…yani ki charo taraf sirf andhera hee andhera tha…koyi insaan nahi , koyi aawaz nahi…charo taraf ghanghor shanti…kya main so raha hoon ? lekin yadi main so chuka hoon toh ye kaise mumkin hai ki main khud se baat kar raha hoon…par ye toh koyi sapna bhi nahi hai…toh phhir asal me main aur mera mann hai kaha ? kahi main neend aur sapne ke beech wali awastha me toh nahi hoon…? Wait, ye aawaz kaisi hai…ye toh…ye toh….mere school ki prayer hai…toh kya main……………………………………………………………
.

“uth be ,so gaya tha kya prayer me….Arman, uth ja..wo dekh Bhaisa idhar hee raha hai…yadi usne prayer time me sote hue dekh liya to…tere pichhwade me seengh ghusa dega”

“Varun tu….”use school dress me dekhkar main chauka…

“aur nahi toh kya…Robert downey Jr. aakar tujhe uthayega…uth ja ab chal…”

“chal ab…ab chal…a bchal….abchal= 6 words yani inse 6! Words banaye ja sakte hai yani ki 720 words….Varun mujhe aisa kyun lag raha hai ki kisi subject ka test hai aaj…aaj test hone ki probability kya hai…?”

“zero bata sannata ”

Prayer khatm hone ke baad main…Varun ke sath kuch der School me idhar-udhar ghoomta raha …aur class teacher ke class me aane se pahle hum dono wapas aa gaye…

“Armaaaan…”

“present sir…”(kabhi toh actual name liya kar be Bulla…ladko ne tera name bhaisa sahi rakha hai…)

“wo dekh Reema…kitni achi lag rahi hai…”abhi attendance chal hee raha tha ki Varun apni adat anusar mujhse baat karne me lag gaya

“chal tujhe main kathin wale theorem explain kar deta hoon ,taki Reema se teri setting ho jaye...main pahle tujhe theorem samjha deta hoon jise tu dialogue bana kar ratt lena aur apne se koyi bhi…I repeat… apne se koyi bhi line mat add karna aur aakhiri me hence proved likhkar pen copy me halke se fekna, lekin pen copy se neeche nahi girna chahiye…I repeat ,pen copy ke neeche nahi girna chahiye warna ghamand wala expression hoga ….pen halke se copy par fekna..hmm… actually fekna mat…pen ko copy me rakhna aur jis side Reema hogi us side ungali se roll kar dena…roll matlab samajhta hai na…ye dekh aise…”apne pen ko desk par roll karke Varun ko dikhate hue main bola “toh ahiste se pen ko roll karna aur muskurate hue normal aawaz me Reema ki taraf dekhkar bolna ….Hence ( ½ second gap ) proved aur phhir waha se turant uthna aur meri taraf aana….turant uthna ,lekin aaram se uthna….hadbada kar nahi aur thank you…you’re so smart type ke words sunkar ansuna karna aur seedhe, bina peechhe mude meri taraf aana….chal ab bol ke dekha hence proved….”

“hence proved..”

“itni jaldi nahi…hence…half second gap….phhir proved….hence proved”

“hence proved…”

“exactly…”

“kaun nalayak peechhe se aawaz kar raha hai…khade ho ja…”humare class teacher shri…shriman Bulla ji ki moti aawaz class me gunj uthi…jise sunkar aadhe student toh aise hee has diye lekin main nahi hasa kyunki main…main toh uski nazar me is school ka sabse acha student tha….main toh apne school ka topper tha…toh phhir according to stupid teacher’s stupid logic…main toh halla kar hee nahi sakta tha….”

“Arman…kaun halla kar raha hai ,name batao toh…”mujhe khada karke Bulla ne pucha…

“sir , ye Varun…Varun halla kar raha hai…”bina ek pal gawaye main bola…

“sir ,Arman jhooth bol raha hai…maine halla nahi kiya…”seena taankar Varun bhi bina ek pal gawaye mere virodh me uth khada hua…

“chup kar nalayak…Arman jhooth thodi bolega ,wo toh school ka sabse acha ladka hai…chal bahar ja class se…”

“kya sir, aap bhi…”

“jaata hai ya main aaun…nalayak…disturb karta hain attendance lete time…”aur phhir meri taraf dekhkar Bulla ne pucha “aur kaun-kaun halla kar raha tha Arman…”

“sir…ye Reema aur uske baju me baithi hai jo isi saal aayi hai…kya name hai uska…. Shweta…haan…Shweta….wo bhi halla kar rahi thi…”

“Sirrrrr…”bijali ki bhati Shweta uthi aur meri taraf dekhkar boli “sir, ye ladka jhooth bol raha hai…”

“Shweta…tum toh padhne me achi ho phhir kyun baat kar rahi thi…aur Arman kabhi jhooth nahi bolta kyunki wo toh…”

“School ka sabse acha ladka hai…”Bulla ki praising lekin boring line ko complete karte hue main bola aur Shweta gusse se mujhe ghurte hue baith gayi...

raha sawal Reema ka toh wo pichhale do saal se mere sath padh rahi thi…isliye wo janti thi ki Bulla ko ullu banana meri aadat hai aur ladkiyo ko warning dekar chhod dena…Bulla ki aadat hai…isliye wo kabhi react nahi karti thi balki andar hee andar ise enjoy karti thi…jiske karan kabhi-kabhi mujhe lagta tha ki shayad wo mujhse man hee man me pyar karti hai….lekin Varun ke karan maine use chhod rakha tha kyunki mera ek siddhant tha ki dost ki bahan aur dost ki maal ko kabhi line nahi marni chahiye….yani ki Varun ki maal Reema mere liye Varun ki bahan ki tarah thi yani ki meri bhi bahan….and this is the first law of friendynamic…..proposed by Sir Arman”
.

School me meri bahut jyada hee dhak thi jiske kayi karan the…pahla karan ye tha ki main School ka topper tha…Literally . last year maine jo marks score school kiye the utne pure school me kisi ne nahi kiye the, upar se mere school me aaj tak ka highest marks ka jo record tha use bhi maine 0.40 % adhik lakar tod diya tha…ye hua pahla karan. Dusara karan ye tha ki main cricket me apne school se state level ke do players me se ek tha aur aage sirf isliye khelne nahi ja paya kyunki mere gharwalo ko laga ki khel me jyada dhyan dene ki vazah se mere marks Pandey ji ki beti se kam aa jayenge…teesara karan ye tha ki main apne school ka president tha…yeah , main president tha…chautha karan ye tha ki mere father mere school ke trustee me se ek the….pachwa karan ye tha ki main apne school se is saal bhi top marne wala tha aur sixth reason ye tha ki main…main tha. Isliye sare teachers mujhe jante bhi the aur mante bhi the…halaki main thoda ghamandi bhi tha jiske chalte ek-do teacher mujh napasand bhi karte the lekin apun ne kabhi iski parvaah nahi ki….
.


Next period me Varun ne mere bataye anusar wo theorem Reema ko explain kiya aur plan ke according hence proved bolkar meri taraf aane laga….

“mujhe dekh rahi hai kya be…”

“hao,chup chap aaja…peechhe mat mudna…tujhe hee dekh rahi hai…”

“lagta hai pat gayi bhai…thank you …kya batau ,tujhe ki kitna khush hoon…”

“soch ,jab sirf mere sath class me baitkar tu itne jhande gaad raha hai toh , yadi exam me mere aage ya peechhe hota toh…mera matlab tera name ‘A’ se hona chahiye tha…”

“lekin mujhe mera name pasand hai…VARUN….VARUN DEV…sakshat bhagwan ke darshan hote hai tujhe roj…aur ab is-se jyada kya chahiye tujhe…”

“mera matlab completely change mat kar…bas samne ka V hata de…Run suffix me rakhe rakh….ARUN….Arun…Varun…Arun….dekh kitna acha name hai….Arun-Arman….jodi bhi jam rahi hai….”

“prabhu mujhe kshama karo …main Varun hee thik hoon…”

“jaisi teri marji…mera kya ,main toh tere hee fayde ki baat kar raha tha….”
.

“sir…Arman sir….”

“kaun hai be…”gusse se daant pees kar main bola aur samne Sharda Vihar me kaam karne wale peon ko dekhkar main apna pura gussa pee gaya,kyunki kisi mahan vyakti ne kaha tha ki yadi kisi shaks ka kirdar janna ho toh ye dekho ki uska bartaav uske neeche ohade me kaam karne walo ke sath kaisa hai…jitna acha bartaav, utna acha wo insaan….

“sorry yar…kal Rathi mam ne itna kaam de diya tha ki raat bhar nahi so paya aur jab tune uthaya toh tujh par chilla utha…sorry”

“koyi baat nahi..”khush hokar usne kaha

“jyada khush mat ho, main sorry isiliye nahi bolta kyunki main apne kiye par sharminda hoon,balki isliye taaki samne wale ko aur sharminda kar saku…ja chay le ke aa…”

“coffee ya chay”

“bidu ,I’m an Engineer…Mechanical Engineer….mujhe chay aur cigarette ki aadat hai…par tune mujhe chay ke liye nahi uthaya…toh phhir kisliye uthaya”

“arey wo toh main batana hee bhool gaya….Vandana mam bula rahi hai…”

“iski to…chain se jeene nahi deti toh kam se kam chain se sone toh de….waise kyun bulaya hai…tujhe koyi idea hai kya…”

“no idea…”

“chal ja phhir…kaha acha khasa main Shweta se milne wala tha, isne utha diya…par manna padega , past ke ek-ek events ko exactly itne detail me yaad karna kitna shandar hai…par kahi ye koyi bimari toh nahi ? kya fark padta hai, kaun sa main kisi ko jaan se maar raha hoon…main toh bas apne hee past events ko realize kar raha hoon….”sochate hue main utha aur jamhayi + angadayi , simultaneously lete hue apni garden chatkayi….
.

“itni der…dus minuts ho gaye tumhe bulaye hue aur tum intercom ka phone kyun nahi utha rahe the…”mere andar ghuste hee Rathi baras padi, iske bawzood ki maine teen din ka kaam ek din me kar diya tha….Sali, randi….isiliye main logo se nafrat karta hoon….kyunki wo hai hee isi ke kabil…

“kal raat ko soya nahi toh…yaha office me aankh lag gayi thi…”

“ye…tumhare late aane ka excuse hai…”phhir se mujhpar cheekhte hue wo boli aur mera matha thanakne laga….wo toh main sokar utha tha isliye thoda shant tha warna abhi tak toh Rathi ko chod ke zameen par bichha diya hota ….par main abhi shant tha…matlab gussa toh mujhe aa raha tha, par main shant tha….

“excuse nahi,mam…ye sach hai…”jamhayi lete hue main bola 

Mera jawab sunkar Rathi mam ki jal gayi,wo mujhe pakka pel hee deti yadi main yaha ek engineer ki haisiyat se na hota toh….lekin wo aisa nahi kar saki aur table par rakhi do files ki taraf ishara karke boli….

“ye do files hai…inki report mujhe kal tak chahiye…”

“bas do…teen kar dijiye…teen kyun…char…abhi toh char ghante office me hee rahunga toh ek toh yahi complete kar dunga….”bolkar main muskura diya jis-se Rathi mam ke chehre ka rang thoda badalne laga ….

“nahi,bas do hee files hai…inhe complete kar dena”

“Madarchod…nahi, madarchod nahi….Madharchod….ye sahi rahega iske liye…thoda vazandar gali….lagta nahi ki main yaha jyada din tik paunga…ye chudail kha jayegi mujhe….BC kal puri raat nahi soya aur aaj bhi ab sona mushqil hai….mana ki main yugpurush hoon lekin lawda kya gand hee mar loge is yugpurush ki, jaga-jaga kar….waise bhi kam sone ki vazah se dimag mera hang marte rahta hai aur toh aur aaj Aradhna ki aawaz bhi sunayi di…yani ki aage bhi sunayi degi…upar se aaj main apne neend aur sapne ke beech me kahi phas gaya tha…wo toh bhala ho school life wale Varun ka jo usne mujhe kheechkar prayer hall me le gaya,warna mera coma me jana tay tha….khair isiliye toh main…main hoon…ek raat aur sahi…cigarette aur daru ke bharose toh main apni puri zindagi kaat doon …ye toh sirf ek raat katne ki baat hai…par kuch bhi ho, Rathi hai badi Madarchad…madarchod nahi…Madharchod….”

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Chapter-7 : Hallucination or Reality
“oh hello…kaha kho gaye…”

“kahi nahi mam,bas aaj kal mera brain ,hang mar deta hai…kahi bhi…..aisa pahle bhi hota tha…lekin aajkal kuch jyada hee ho raha hai…khair, koyi baat nahi…kal tak ye files bhi complete ho jayegi”

.

Jab aap do raat soye nahi hote hai toh kaisa mahsoos hota hai ye bayan karna thoda mushqil hai…kyunki BC, kuch sahi se mahsoos hee nahi hota….halki si bhi aawaz room me hone par wo bahut der tak kaan me gunjati rahti hai aur aapka dimag us aawaz ki nakal karta rahta hai,jab tak ki usko koyi dusara kaam nahi mil jata….lagatar do raat tak jagne ka jo ek nuksan hai usme se ek ye bhi ki chizo ko mahsoos karne ki aapki Shakti kam ho jati hai….jaisa ki abhi mere sath ho raha tha….room ka fan on tha,lekin phhir bhi mujhe uski hawa mahsoos nahi ho rahi thi…main har panch-dus minutes ke baad apna sar pakad kar dabata…khujata aur phhir kaam par lag jata….beech-beech me mujhe kayi aawaze bhi sunayi deti…jinme se kuch aawazo ko toh main pahchanta tha par kuch ko nahi…mujhe kabhi auto ki aawaz sunayi deti toh kabhi train ki….jabki in dono se main is samay kafi door tha…mujhe aisa lagta ki Varun jag raha hai aur chadar oodhe mujhe ektak nihare ja raha hai…lekin jab main uski taraf dekhta toh bistar par wo mujhe sote hue hee milta tha….mujhe kuch pal ke liye aisa lagta… jaise ki bahar bahut tez aandhi chal rahi hai toh kuch pal aisa lagta jaise ki dharti hil rahi hai….kabhi mujhe kitchen me mere aur Varun ke aalawa kisi teesare ke hone ka ahsaas hota toh kabhi kitchen me bartan ke girne ki aawaz sunayi deti….mujhe aisa bhi lagta jaise ki is ghupp andhere me koyi balcony ke khule darwaje se mujhe jhak raha hai aur bas mere sone ka intezaar kar raha hai….par main janta tha ki ye sab sirf ek vaham hai, mere dimag ka vaham…asliyat me toh abhi room ka fan on hai aur is flat me mere aur Varun ke aalawa teesara koyi nahi hai….ek taraf mere dimag ne jaha mere andar dar paida kiya tha wahi dusari taraf mere dimag ne hee us dar se samna karne ki taqat mujhe di thi….kahne ka matlab hai ki main dar toh raha tha lekin itna nahi ki phati me balcony aur kitchen ka darwaja band karke chup chap so jaun…warna mere fans kya sochenge….wo toh jeete-jee mar jayenge mujhe is kadar dara hua dekhkar….yahi sochate hue maine apne laptop ko thoda kinare kiya aur aankh band karke apna sar dabane laga…ki kisi ke sparsh se mera pura rom-rom kanp utha…mujhe aisi kapkapi hui ki bas pucho mat… jisne bhi mere jaangh par hath rakha tha uska dar ab mere andar sama chuka tha….mujhe aisa lag raha tha jaise ki wo bas mere aankh khulne ka intezar kar raha hai aur mere aankh kholte hee kuch aisa karega jiski maine kalpana tak nahi ki hogi….isiliye maine apni aankh nahi kholi aur waise hee ankh band kiye hue leta raha….
Jisne kuch der pahle mujhe sparsh kiya tha ,wo ab ungaliyo se mere jaangh me taal de raha tha aur har guzarte waqt ke sath mere dil ki dhadkane tez hoti ja rahi thi…


“Arman, ye sab ek vaham hai…tere dimag ki mangadhat kahani…haqiqat me yaha tere aur Varun ke siwa koyi nahi hai…”ye sochate hue maine apni aankh kholne ka nirnay liya 

main hundred percent sure tha ki jab main apni ankhe kholunga toh samne koyi nahi hoga…Yahi sochate hue maine apni aankh ek jhatke me kholi par main galat tha… mujhe mere samne kisi ka chehra dikha jo apni aankhe badi kiye hue mujhe ghoor raha tha …maine bina ek pal gawaye apna pura jor lagakar use peeche dhakka diya aur uthkar kaske ek laat uski chhati par mari….iske baad main use marta hee gaya ,bas marta hee gaya….lekin wo na toh mera virodh kar raha tha aur na hee mujhse bachne ki koshish kar raha tha…wo toh bas apna daant fadkar mar khate hue hase ja raha tha….

“kaun hai…madarchod tu…bol…kaun hai …”uske muh pe laat marker maine puchha aur jab usne koyi jawab nahi diya toh use phhir se marne laga…
Ye silsila kafi der tak chalta raha…main use marta aur beech-beech me sawal bhi karta ,lekin usne koyi jawab nahi diya…uske muh aur naak se khoon nikalkar floor par bah raha tha lekin wo tha ki bas haste hue maar khaye ja raha tha aur jab main use maar-maar kar thak gaya toh wo utha aur balcony ki taraf badha….main use aur bhi marna chahta tha…main use jaan se marna chahta tha lekin ab mujhme itni bhi taqat nahi thi ki main kuch bol bhi paun…yaha tak ki mujhe saans lene me bhi dikkat ho rahi thi isliye puri tarah thak kar main bistar par gir pada aur thodi der baad jab mujhme kuch himmat aayi toh mujhe kuch shabd sunayi diye….

“main phhir aaunga….”

Maine apni puri taqat laga di khud ko uthane ke liye aur jaise hee wo balcony se kuda main bhi uthkar uske peeche balcony se kood gaya…

“bhagta kaha hai lawde, rook…teri maa ka…”bolte hue maine use pakda 

Lekin abki baar wo mujhse chhoot gaya aur boundary se chhalang markar Colony ke sadak par bhagne laga…is samay raat ke do ya teen baje the…jiske karan is samay full shanti thi…aisa lag hee nahi raha tha ki ye koyi colony hai yani ghanghor shanti...bhagte hue kayi baar main uske karib pahucha…lekin jaise hee main use pakadne ki koshish karta wo apni speed aur tez kar deta….jiske karan mera gussa aur meri raftaar dono lagatar badh rahi thi….par yaha sochane wali baat ye hai ki main aisa kar kyun raha tha jabki mujhe maloom tha ki wo sirf aur sirf mere dimag ki ek upaj hai aur tab daudte waqt mujhe realize hua ki main toh aisa bilkul bhi nahi karna chahta…wo toh bas apne aap hee ho raha hai…jaise ki kisi ne mujhe command de di ho ki Arman tujhe bas bhagna hai….maine khud ko rokna chaha lekin mere kadam ruk hee nahi rahe the,main toh bas uske peechhe-peechhe andha-dhundh bhage ja raha tha….duadte-daudte main colony se bahar nikal aaya aur ab bhi main us anjaan shaks ka peecha karte hue daud raha tha….


“main rook kyun nahi raha…ye ho kya raha hai…”daudte hue main jor se cheekha aur khud ko rokne ki tarqeeb sochane laga ki mujhe samne ek ped dikhayi diya…

“Arman…rukne ka sirf ek hee tarika hai…samne wale ped ke paas jab pahuchega toh us-se takra jana…isase chot toh aayegi ,par atleast tu ruk toh jayega…ok, done phhir….”

Aur isi ke sath meri ped ke sath jabardast takkar hui.Ped toh ek inch bhi nahi hila par main takra kar kayi meter door ja gira aur jo shabd mere muh se nikla wo tha “behanchod” 

iske baad maine na koyi aawaz nikali aur na hee koyi pratikriya di….kyunki main ab iske kabil hee nahi tha….mujhe aisa lag raha tha ki ped se takrane ke karan shayad mera left wala kandha toot gaya hai lekin phhir bhi main shant wahi zameen par pada raha aur kuch der baad wahi so gaya…..


.
Subah meri neend surya ki kirno ke mere aankh ke sath hue collision ke karan khuli aur maine wahi zameen par pade-pade apne aas-paas ke mahol ka jayja liya….

“National Highway 6(NH 6)…jo Gujarat… Maharashtra… Chhattisgarh… odisha… Jharkhand aur Kolkata ko jodti hai, is samay din ke 7 baje honge…aasman khula hai ,isliye barish hone ki sambhavna na ke barabar hai….temperature 26 degree hai aur sadak ke dono taraf ped lage hue hai jiske karan thandi-thandi hawa bhi chal rahi hai….great ”kahte hue maine apna baya kandha sahlaya…. “not bad…bas dard hee hai, haddi sahi *****at hai….”

Apne kandhe ko sahlate hue main utha aur jeb se cigarette nikal kar rajnikant style me muh ke taraf feka lekin mera nishana chuk gaya aur cigarette mere chehre se takra kar neeche zameen me gir gaya

“main aaj bhi feke hue cigarette nahi uthata ….hhayi…”neeche gire cigarette ko dekhkar maine khud se kaha…isi beech mera hath mere pant ki jeb me rakhe mere goggle par gaya aur mujhe maloom chala ki baye kandhe ke sahare ped se takrane ke karan goggle ke ek taraf ka kanch toot gaya tha….maine ek aur cigarette jalakar ek lamba kash kheecha aur toota hua goggle pahankar dhua udate hue River View Colony ki taraf chal pada….

Room me Varun ab tak so raha tha aur use sota hua dekh mera mann kiya ki uske pichhwade me ek kaskar laat maru…lekin phhir socha ki jane do yar…mujhe neend nahi aati iska matlab ye thode hee hai ki main dusaro ko bhi na sone du….:khushnaseeb hai wo log jinhe chain ki neend aati hai yaha toh BC aankh bhi band karo toh bhoot nazar aate hai:
.

“tu kitne din se nahi nahaya be….”Bathroom se nahakar nikalte waqt Varun ne pucha aur maine use completely ignore maar diya…matlab na toh uske sawal ka jawab diya aur na hee uski taraf dekha….main toh is waqt Rathi mam ki di hui do files ko complete karke facebook chala raha tha….

“tu fb bhi use karta hai…meri photo like kar dena phhir… jo kal maine Sonam ke sath mall me kheechi thi aur mann kare toh sweetest couple type ke kuch comment bhi kar dena…”

“done…”

“waise tu fb kyun chala raha hai…”

“ab lawda sab tumko bata du…”

“bata na bhai…”

“ajeeb jabarjasti hai…chal na, tera photo like kar dunga aur sweetest couple wala comment bhi thok dunga…”

“ye kaun hai…jiski tune profile khol rakhi hai…”

“ye aaya na tu point par….ye Rathi mam hai, Sharda Enterprises ke Nagpur branch ki manager….soch raha hu friend request bhej du…lekin Sali ne ignore kar diya toh bezzati ho jayegi…waise tana tann maal hai na…”

“hmmm…shadi ho gayi iski…”

“pata nahi…”

“name ke aage kya likhati hai…Miss ya Mrs.”

“Ms. ”

“dhat teri ki…”bolkar Varun mere paas se door chala gaya
tabhi mera mobile bajne laga….maine dekha call Nisha ki thi aur mere receive karte hee wo boli….

“ye kaise dialer tone hai….Rishte me toh hum tumhare baap lagte hai, name hai Arman….Amitabh Bachchan ke bade wale fan ho kya…”

“ringtone ho toh Shri Arman ke jaise,warna na ho…”BigB ka ek aur dialogue chipkate hue maine kaha “toh finally tumhe meri yaad aa hee gayi, do din baad…”

“toh tumne kyun phone nahi kiya…kya ye kahi ka rule hai ki main hee har baar phone karu…bhagwan ne tumhe bhi mobile diya hai, number dial karne ke liye hath diya hai aur abki baar toh maine soch liya tha ki main na toh tumse milungi aur na hee tumhe pahle se call karungi…but I lost once again…”

“so…”

“wo actually, main aur Varun aur Shipra aur Sonam….David ke sath sham ko dinner par ja rahe hai…toh socha ki tum bhi aana chaho…”

“main ye sab ochhe kaam nahi karta”

“please aa jao na…I love you..love you..love you”

“thik hai…venue sms kar dena…mood hoga toh aa jaunga,lekin phhir yadi mere se kuch ulta seedha ho gaya toh mujhe blame mat karna…aajkal mere andar koyi naya virus ghus gaya hai,jiska antivirus dhoondane me mujhe time lagega…”

“don’t worry, main tumhe sambhal lungi…ok bye and thank you…love you…”

“fuck you…”mobile bistar par fek-kar main bola “ye mujhe sambhal legi…huh…yaha main hee khud ko nahi sambhal pa raha hoon aur ye kahti hai ki ye mujhe sambhal legi aur BC ye kya chutiyapa laga rakha hai is David ne…lawde ko lund pakdana hee padega…jab se shahar me aaya hai, Nisha ko mujhse door kiye hue hai….rook beta tu aaj sham ko mil …itna chodunga ki body se paseena nahi balki khoon niklega…”

“kya boli Nisha…”Varun ne puchha

“acha toh tum bhi shamil ho…darasal ye tera hee plan raha hoga mujhe bahar le jane ka…tune socha hoga ki tere bolne se toh main jaunga nahi toh tune Nisha ko patti padha di…aur toh aur us popcorn killer Shipra aur Jhatu David ko bhi shamil kar liya…ye jante hue bhi ki mujhe naye logo ke contact me rahna bilkul bhi pasand nahi…”

“Shipra se toh tu mil chukka hai aur rahi baat David ki toh actually kal raat ko M.B.D. restaurant me meri aur Sonam ki mulaqat David se hui thi…wahi Sonam ne mujhe David ka introduction Nisha ke childhood friend ke taur par karaya…hum teeno phhir kafi der tak MBD Restaurant me baithkar idhar-udhar ki baate karte rahe….tabhi usne mujhe aaj ke dinner ke liye invite kiya toh main mana nahi kar paya…”

“toh phhir mujhe isme kyun shamil kiya…”

“Nisha ke kahne par…Nisha ne mujhe phone kiya tha ki main tujhe kah du…lekin main janta tha ki tu meri baat manega nahi, isliye maine ye kaam Nisha ko hee saunp diya…”

“aur ye bhi bata diya ki mujhe razi kaise karna hai….wah, badi achi dosti nibhayi tune”

“haan toh isme galat kya hai…tujhe problem kya hai Shipra aur David se….David ko toh tu janta bhi nahi…”

“asal me mujhe problem Shipra ya David se nahi balki…balki naye logo se milne me hai…mera matlab kaise log in bade-bade hotel me baithkar badi-badi baate karte hai…bewazah ek dusaro ko advice dete hai…kisi teesare ki peeth peeche burayi karte ya politics ka adhura gyan chodte hai….isme se kuch do kaudi ke log bhi hote hai jo bharat ke itihas ki charcha karte hai aur Mahatma Gandhi ko ulta seedha bolkar ye dikhate hai ki wo kitne joshile hai…kitni aag hai unke andar aur yadi paas me koyi unke aukat ka ya unse adhik aukat wala kuch galat kare toh unme ratti bhar bhi himat nahi hoti ki wo use jakar roke….dar-asal ye log jo ache ,sabhya hone ka dhong karte hai…wo isliye nahi ki kyunki wo aisa karna chahte hai balki isliye kyunki ye sab karne ka unke paas paisa aur power hai…lekin main aisa nahi hoon…main har situation…har temperature…har pressure par constant rahta hoon….na toh main change hota hoon aur na hee meri values….baki sab sale variable hai…. Upar se main thahra Mechanical department se …mujhe ghutan hoti hai itni sari ladkiyo ke beech aur jab wo apna muh pout karke selfie leti hai toh mera mann karta hai ki unke muh me mukka maar du…aur toh aur unke sath BC unke sath wale ladke bhi aise gand ke chhed jaisi shakl banakar photo khichwate hai , in short ….i Hate everyone….i…..i….just….hate…..everyone….”
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Mujhe nahi pata par Kya kisi ne kabhi gaur kiya hai ki kya matlab hota hai “GANDU” aur “GAND” jaise sabhya…susheel shabdo ka ? Gandu ko hatao….Gand par concentrate karte hai…what is its actual meaning….maine bahut sari adult stories me dekha hai ki kayi bar log is shabd ka kuch is tarah istemaal karte hai,jaise ki “main uske gand ko kaskar masalne laga….uska gand mere gand se touch ho raha tha….maine uske gand me lund dal diya jisase wo cheekh uthi…”
Darasal main puchhna ye chah raha hoon ki gand ka asali matlab kya hota hai…pichhwada ya phhir pichhwade ke beech ka…………………..hm-uh……you got it…I know you got it. Par main ek Yugpurush hokar ye sab kyun soch raha hoon…mana ki mujhe hardcore anal sex ka video dekhna pasand hai lekin aisi baate publicy karna ,kya ye mere jaise mahan insaan ko shobha deta hai ? nahi ? darasal baat ye thi ki maine abhi-abhi Ms.Rathi ka pichhwada dekha tha aur confuse ho gaya ki uske us portion ko gand bolu ya nahi….bas isiliye,baki toh main bedam sharif hoon 

“excellent…Arman…you’re too good… actually you’re …”

“fantabulous…?”Rathi mam ko word suggest karte hue main apna kaan khujane laga….

“hmmmm….yes…mujhe toh laga hee nahi tha ki tum ek din pura nahi sone ke bawzood dusare din bhi apna kaam khatm kar loge…you’re amazing”

“bas mam ”

“today you’re free….jo karna hai karo…jago ya so jao…mujhe koyi matlab nahi…bas kisi se complain nahi aani chahiye….baki jo karna hai karo…”

“chudai karu teri…”Rathi mam ko dekhkar maine man hee man me kaha aur ek taraf ishara karte hue puchha ki wo jo us side world cup jaisa kuch rakha hai ,wo unhe kyun mila tha….

“acha wo…wo toh mujhe promotion ke samay mila tha jab main senior executive se Manager bani thi tab….you wanna see it”

“why not”

Aur isi ke sath Rathi mam apne ghumaudar chair se uthi aur us cup ki taraf jaane lagi jispar main mootu tak na…wo toh apun ko Rathi ki gand dekhni thi isiliye maine us-se us world cup ke bare me pucha tha….Rathi mam ke pichhwade ko bade gaur se dekhte hue maine khud se kaha “chal beta, aaj raat ke mutth marne ka jugad ho gaya…”

“acha hai…kitna bada aur mota hai….aur beech me chhed bhi hai ”Rathi mam ke gand aur cup ko ek sath mix karke maine kaha…

“aisi bhi koyi taarif karta hai..kya ? mota hai , bada hai aur beech me chhed bhi hai ”thoda hairan hote hue wo boli “Arman mere kal ke behavior ke liye…sorry ,thoda personal problem tha…jiski vazah se main thoda gusse me thi….tumne bura toh nahi mana na…”

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Aur tabhich mere Arman Version 2.0 ne mujhe aadesh diya ki main Rathi mam se cheekh-cheekh kar bolu ki “janeman…bura wo manta hai…jiske paas bur hota hai aur mere paas toh lawda hai…main bura nahi manta balki bur fad deta hoon…” lekin maine khud pe control kiya aur Rathi mam ki baat dhyan lagakar sun-ne laga taki jab main apne mann me isko chodte waqt apna lawda iske muh me dalu toh main iske muh aur daant ka actual size aur shape soch saku….

“tumne dil pe le liya kya….”

“abey ye toh mera dialogue tha…”chaukte hue maine ek baar phhir khud ko control kiya aur shant baitha raha…

“ok…Arman…thank you…”

“actually mam ,you like my simplicity….i mean I like your simplicity….thank you”kahte hue main utha aur Rathi mam ke cabin se bahar aa gaya.

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Aaj ka din mere liye thoda acha tha,kyunki aaj Rathi janeman ne kuch bhi kaam mujhe nahi diya tha…na hee koyi officework aur na hee koyi homework…jisase maine ye socha ki mujhe Nisha aur uske dosto ke sath dinner par jana chahiye….warna mere fans kahenge ki Shri Arman ki social life zero hai….mujhe aaj office me koyi kaam nahi tha isliye main aaj ek ghante pahle hee bina kisi ko bataye Sharda Vihar se nikal gaya....

“kidhar jaoge”Sharda Complex ke bahar mujhe khada dekh ek autowale ne pucha…

“tum kidhar jaoge…”

“apun toh kidhar bhi chale jayega,yadi sawari ho toh…”

“Ganga-jamuna chalega kya…”

“par waha ka double charge lagega…police ka lafda hota hai udhar”

((Ganga-Jamuna is the third largest red-light area{brothel} of India,located in Nagpur))

“kitna lega…”

“waise toh 200 rupaye per candidate leta hai apun ladko ko us chakle me chhodne ke liye lekin aap single ho isliye 300 rupiya lega…”

“kaha lega….muh me…? itna rate toh waha ke chakle ki chakliyo ka bhi nahi hai….”

“bade…risk bhi toh apun ko jyada hai…kisi ne dalal samajh ke dhar liya toh panch-dus hazar gaye jeb se…”

“aisa kya…chal phhir nahi jata….tum bhi kya yaad rakhega ki kis…..oye auto….”bagal se guzarte hue auto ko aawaz dene ke chakkar me maine apna dialogue adhura chhoda aur jo autowala mere paas khada tha us-se bola”chal thik hai bidu…apun chalta hai…par ek din tere khatir zaroor jaunga us red right area me matlab…red light area me....kya bolta hai tu use…”

“chakla…”

“haan….. us chakle me zaroor jaunga main….”
.

Jab main auto me baitha toh main akela tha…lekin bahut der ke liye nahi aur jald hee agle chauk se auto me do aur logo ka aagman hua…jisme se ek ladki thi aur ek uska boyfriend….aisa maine socha…waise toh wo dono bhai-bahan bhi ho sakte the…ya jija-Sali…ya devar-bhabhi bhi…lekin maine unhe girlfriend aur boyfriend hee samjha kyunki iski probability jyada thi. Auto me ladka mere bagal me baitha aur ladki ko usne apne bagal me baithaya…jise dekhkar mera mann kiya ki launde ke muh me thook du,lekin phhir maine aisa nahi kiya aur chupchap earphone laga kar gana sunne laga lekin thodi der baad hee Vandana Rathi phone ke through mujhe disturb karne aa gayi….

“Ye BC Rathi…na toh mujhe chain se jeene deti hai…na chain se sone deti hai aur ab toh BC mujhe chain se gaana bhi sunne nahi de rahi rahi…kya karu…mar jaun kya ab…ye lawda private naukri hoti hee aisi hai….bhad me gayi ….MC”aur isi ke sath maine ungali swipe karke mam ko red wale option par lejakar apne mobile se bahar kar diya…..

Auto me aaj kuch interesting nahi hua aur ek baar toh mujhe auto wale ne aage baithne ke liye bhi kaha…jiske liye maine shuru me toh saaf mana kar diya lekin phhir uske request ke karan main maan gaya…

“change mangta apun ko bidu. Sau ki patti toh apun ke paas bhi hai…”

“toh apne us sau ki patti ki batti bana aur daal le….andar”

“change nahi hai bhai….”accelerator ko ghumate hue wo bola….

“chal phhir kal le lena…”

“rook, apun jugad karta hai kuch….” wo auto wala peechhe muda aur baki logo se 
kiraya collect karke mujhe dete hue bola “ye le bidu….tere 70 …”

“thik hai…”

“ok…thank you bidu…”

“sala…chaklabaz”jeb me paise rakhne ke baad maine auto wale ki taraf dekhkar kaha lekin shayad usne dhyan se suna nahi aur kuch reply diye bina hee waha se chala gaya
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River View colony ki taraf chalte hue maine apna mobile nikala aur whatsapp se jo gandi-gandi photos aur videos download hui thi unhe dekhne laga…. River View colony ,NH-6 ke thik bagal se laga hua tha lekin mujhe NH-6 se wo 200-250 meters ka rasta bahut akharta tha…mere mann me khayal bhi aaya tha ki main bike se Sharda Vihar aaun-jaun lekin meri tharak ne mere is khayal ko darashahi kar diya…. isliye main office se aate waqt pure raste kuch na kuch karte rahta tha….abhi main River View Colony ki taraf aate hue ek video hee dekh raha tha ki ek safed color ki Mercedes mere bagal se sansanate hui nikli aur phhir thoda aage jakar ruk gayi….lekin mera dhyan ab bhi mobile par tha….main is waqt mobile me ek desi hot video dekh raha tha aur wo video dekhne me main itna busy tha ki mujhe abhi mere aas-paas ho rahi ghatnao ki koyi jaankari nahi thi…bole toh ,Arjun drishti aur meri arjun drishti tab tak kayam rahi jab tak ki main khud us Mercedes ke pichhwade se nahi takra gaya….

.
“bc…kaise beech raste me car khadi kar rakhi hai…”car ke pichhwade se hui meri takkar ke baad sambhal kar khade hote hue main cheekha aur video ko wahi se chalu kiya jaha se mercedes ke sath collision ke karan main dekh nahi paya tha….

“kya chutiyapa kar raha hai lawda…chod na…BC…. ek toh camera jhat jagah set kiya hua hai…upar se sirf doodh dabaye ja raha hai.. chhote log abey,lawda chusa lawdi ko…”

“Arman….”

“ye kaun bola be…”aaju-baju nazar marker main dheere se bola aur jab mujhe koyi nahi dikha toh maine socha ki ye mera bhram hai….isliye apna lawda khujate hue aage badh gaya.

“Armaaaan….”abki baar thodi tez aawaz me kisi ne mera name pukara….

“Aradhna…? Lekin uski aawaz toh aisi nahi hai….phhir kaun sa naya character mere dimag me ghus gaya hai…ek toh lawda waise hee kal raat wala launda ,jise maine khoob mara…wo bolkar gaya hai ki wo phhir aayega…upar se Aradhna ki aawaz bhi mujhe aajkal sunayi dene lagi hai….uspar ab teesara kaun aa gayi….teesara matlab teesari…. matlab abki baar wali aawaz ek ladki ki thi aur yadi mera sixth sense sahi hai toh….BC kya khak sahi hai…din bhar uzool-fizool ki chize dikhate rahta hai….”

“Armaaaaaaaaan..”thoda aur intensity ke sath ye aawaz phhir mere kano me gunji…

.
Aur tab mujhe ahsaas hua ki ye aawaz na toh mere aaju se aa rahi hai… na toh baju se… aur na hee mere aage se….. darasal ye aawaz mere peechhe se aa rahi thi aur jab mujhe iska ahsaas hua toh main peeche palta

“iski maa ka ….Rathi Lund….ye yaha kya kar rahi hai…kahi ye mere 1400 gm ke dimag ki koyi ghinauni kartoot toh nahi…ya ye sach me yaha hai…let me think…Rathi mam ne mujhe teen baar bulaya aur teeno baar unki aawaz gradually badhi hui thi yani ki jab unhone second time mera name liya toh pahli baar se aawaz jyada tej thi aur jab teesari baar mera name liya toh pahle ke dono baar se jyada tej thi…yani ki normal human behaviour ?….wo mere taraf abhi thoda gusse se dekh rahi hai…ye bhi normal human behaviour ?…lekin jo sochane wali baat hai wo ye ki….ye is samay yaha kya kar rahi hai….ye toh meri fan bhi nahi hai…isliye yaha par mamla gadbadata hai…yani ki ye sirf meri thinking hai….actual me Rathi mam yaha hai hee nahi….toh kya karu…jaun uske paas ya yahi khade rahu….”
Main abhi isi soch me dooba hua tha ki Rathi mam ne mujhe apni taraf na aata dekh car start ki aur meri taraf aane lagi….aur main ab bhi isi confusion me tha ki Rathi mam yaha par haqiqat me hai ya ye sirf mera ek vaham hai….

“tumhe sunayi nahi deta …bahre ho gaye ho kya…kab se aawaz de rahi hoon…”mere thik bagal me car rok kar Rathi mam boli….

“dress toh wahi hai subah wali…toh kya ye sach me yaha hai…ek kaam karta hoon…chhu kar dekhta hoon…lekin kal raat jab main use maar raha tha tab bhi toh main use chhu hee raha tha…yani ki iski koyi guarantee nahi hai ki touch wali feeling se meri is samsya ka solution nikal jayega…lekin phhir bhi ek baar touch kar hee leta hoon… ”

maine car ke window par rakhe Rathi mam ke hath ko ek baar dheere se chhua aur jhatke se turant hata liya…. “real lag reli hai…” bolte hue maine dusari baar ahiste se Rathi mam ke hath ko chhua aur confirm karne ke liye teesari baar Rathi mam ke hath ko touch karke sahlane laga…

“tum ye kar kya rahe ho..tumhara dimag toh sahi hai na…”

“yes……..i mean, no….yes….actually main check kar raha tha ki aap haqiqat me ho ya ye sirf mera……you know”

“fallacy…”

“hmmm”

“tum psycho ho kya…”

“use hatao…aur mujhe batao ki yadi aap real ho toh aap yaha kya kar reli ho…”

“kar reli….”haste hue Rathi mam boli…

“ye le…iska toh itne me hee gand fat gaya…iska tab kya hoga jab main lambe-lambe dialogue marunga…tab toh has-has ke iske gand se pani nikal jayega…mera matlab choot se pani nikal jayega”

“tumne kuch kaha kya…tumhare honth silent mode me fadfada rahe hai…”

“mera lund ,jyada fadfada raha hai…”silent mode me hee apne honth fadfadate hue maine kaha…

“again…”

“aapne mere sawal ka jawab nahi diya ki aap yaha mere peechhe kyun aayi hai…”

“oh hello, main tumhare peeche nahi aayi hoon, River View Colony me mera flat hai, E-5 aur mujhe maloom hai ki tum yahi rahte ho….A-3 flat me….”

“ab fas gayi na,janeman…..tum haqiqat me nahi ho…ha…ha…ha…”daant fad ke haste hue main bola ,jiske baad Rathi mam bhi hasne lagi….lekin phhir haste hue achanak wo ruk gayi…

“ek minute….abhi kya bola tumne mujhe….”chehre ka rang laal karte hue usne meri taraf dekha

“chal na…jab tu yaha hai hee nahi toh main tujhse kyun daru…mere khud ke dimag me itna bhav kha rahi hai…chal nikal…”

“tumhari himmat kaise hui…”

“nahi toh kya karegi…ek-do files aur de degi….huh…Shri Arman ke liye wo punishment nahi balki baye hath ka khel hai….tu apne real version me sochati hogi ki tu dhada dhad files mujhe dekar mujhe pareshan kar rahi hai…bitch please....yadi dena hai toh 7-8 files de…ye teen-char files toh main mutth marte hue complete kar deta hoon….aur aise kya dekh rahi hai, maregi kya mujhe…le maar…ye tera office nahi hai jaha tu mujhpar raub jhadegi…ek ulte hath ki padegi na toh……...khair chhod”bolte hue maine apna wahi ek side se toota hua goggle lagaya aur phhir cigarette jalate hue bola “ab mujhe kya jhak reli hai…chal khisak le dabi me…”

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Itna bolkar main waha se jaane laga lekin mujhe andar hee andar mahsoos hua ki maine Vandana Rathi ki insult karne me apna sau pratishat nahi diya hai, isliye main wapas Vandana Rathi ke paas jakar ek lamba kash kheencha aur dhua Vandana Rathi ke muh par fek kar bola “tu abhi tak idharich hai…chup chap nikal le…warna ek mukka marunga na toh ek mahine tak dard dega….”
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Chapter-8 : The Dinner
Girlfriend- ye ek hee word kafi hai un logo ko jalane ke liye ,jinke paas ye nahi hoti aur ye ek hee word kafi hai un logo ko dilasa dene ke liye jo iske chakkar me chutiya bane hai…ab log kahenge ki Shri Arman ,ladkiyo ki izzat nahi karta….Shri Arman , sexist hai…. toh mera logo se kahna hai ki…haan ,hoon main sexist .jo ukhadna hai ukhad lo….i see women as sexual objects….koyi pyar nahi…koyi chutiyapa nahi….sirf chudai…actually main kahna ye chahta hoon ki zindagi kitni simple hai lekin hum ise pyar ke chutiyape me padkar complicated bana dete hai…dusare shabdo me……zindagi kitni simple hoti yadi hum pyar ke chutiyape me nahi padte toh….aur isi karan main Nisha ko jhel raha tha…warna kab ka Aradhna ki tarah nikal kar fek diya hota….

Lekin Nisha ko jhelne ki sirf yahi vazah nahi thi…dar-asal kabhi-kabhi wo mujhe achchhi lagti thi.isiliye main use abhi tak apni girlfriend banaye hue tha….lekin mujhe ye bilkul pasand nahi ki main apni girlfriend ke liye dikhawe ki zindai jiyu….matlab un jagah par jaana jaha main jana nahi chahta…us tarike se jeena jaise main jeena nahi chahta…wo sab movie actual me dekhna jise dekhne ki kalpana shayad main sapne me bhi na karoon….. yahi vazah hai ki main aur Nisha aajkal jyada nahi milte….jaha ektaraf main usase pareshan hoon toh dusari taraf wo mujhse…lekin phhir bhi hum dono aise dikhate hai jaise ki hum kitne khush hai….mujhe yaad nahi ki Nisha ne last time mere sath coffee kab pee thi….shuru-shuru me toh mujhe laga ki ye sab uske naraz rahne ke karan ho raha hai…lekin jab us din usne M.B.D. restaurant me mere sath jane ke bajay David ke sath film dekhne jane ka decision liya tab mujhe thoda shaq hua aur maine Nisha ke bartaav me aaye parivartan ko gaur karne laga aur tab main is conclusion par pahucha ki hum dono ki relgadi ab kisi bhi samay patri se utar sakti hai aur ho na ho….is kaam me uska dost David zaroor humari relgadi ko patri se neeche dhakka dene ka kaam karega….main sab janta tha, main wo sab kuch mahsoos kar sakta tha jo ki Nisha mere bare me aajkal sochati hai…lekin main phhir bhi kuch nahi kar raha tha aur kyun nahi kar raha tha….kyunki ye sab mujhe bahut boring lagta hai…yani ki mujhe pasand nahi hai…..khair is waqt Varun mere samne badhiya suit pahan raha hai aur main is samay bhi yahi soch raha hoon ki ….main dinner par jaun ya nahi…

“chal na taiyar ho…”

“Nisha ko bol dena ki mujhe thoda kaam aa gaya tha office me…isliye main nahi aa paya…”

“itna simple bahana…wo bhi Shri Arman ke case me…maza nahi aaya….chal jaldi se taiyar ho aur by the way main koyi jhooth nahi bolne wala…”

“toh thik hai…main bol deta hoon…”

“sale sharam kar…wo nahi hoti toh devdas banker sadak par ghoom raha hota Disha ki yaad me…”

“Esha ”

“haan,wahi…Esha ki yaad me…aur tu uske liye uske dost ke sath dinner me nahi ja sakta…jaha main khud bhi hoon tere sath…”

.
Aur tab suddenly mujhe realize hua ki kis halat me main Nagpur aaya tha…jaise mera koyi wazood hee na ho…log mere aas-paas se guzarte toh the lekin mujh par unka koyi effect nahi dikhta tha…main jaha ek baar baith gaya toh ghanto wahi baitha rahta aur pura din sirf apne ateet ke uljhano me khoya rahta tha….mere college ke aakhiri din main muskurane ki acting kar raha tha aur aise behave kar raha tha jaise ki mujhe koyi fark hee nahi padta…lekin fark pada tha…jisme Esha aur Gautam ne milkar char-chand laga diye the….seriously I miss Rajshri Pandey, hostel…my friends….fights between hostlers and other college students…. Esha…. Anchoring…. aur tabhi mujhe S.P. yaad aaya aur uske sath me Aradhna aur wo sab kuch jo maine Aradhna ke sath jeete hue kiya aur wo sab kuch jo uske marne ke baad mere sath hua….maine phhir bhi khud ko sambhala aur final semester ka exam diya aur chahta tha ki Esha mere sath rahe…lekin aakhiri exam ke din usne bhi…………..leave it.

.
aksar mere man me ye khayal aata hai ki bhagwan kyun mujhe wo sab kuch nahi de deta jo main chahta hoon…jise paane ke liye maine mehnat ki…jiske liye main tadpa aur phhir main un logo ko dekhta hoon jinke paas wo hai aur tab main samajh jata hoon ki wo log…wo chize jinhe main pana chahta tha…wo mere layak hee nahi thi…

.
“dekh Arman last time puch raha hoon ….chalega…”

“hmmm…chalo, chalte hai…mera kya bigdega”bolkar main utha aur taiyar hone laga…

.
Ek bade hotel me jaane ka baki kya fayda hota hai, ye toh mujhe nahi pata par ek jo fayda mujhe hamesha dikhta hai wo ye ki aisi jagaho par maal bahut hoti hai…waitress se lekar customer tak….sab fad maal hoti hai aur aisi jagah par main aur mera hathiyar hardum taiyar rahte hai….hathiyar se mera matlab hai mere muh se….aapne kya samjha ?

“tumne kuch order nahi kiya, Arman…”mujhe dekhkar David ne kaha aur suddenly mujhe ahsas hua ki mujhe bhi kuch order karna chahiye.

“jo Varun ne order kiya same wahi”Shipra ki taraf muskurate hue dekhkar main bola “aur do char kilo popcorn…”

“Nisha…dekh ,Arman phhir se mujhse kaise baat kar raha hai…”

“main tujhse baat hee kaha kar raha hoon…aur jo sach hai wo sach hai…tu accept kyun nahi kar leti ki tune us din 500 ka popcorn akele khaya tha”

“very funny”

Sab kuch thik tha…sab kuch normal hee chal raha tha ,jab tak ki David ne mujhe toka nahi…..

“Nisha ne bataya tha mujhe ki ,tum Vegetarian ho…par sharab bahut peete ho”

“kyunki mera aisa manna hai ki kisi aur ki jaan lene se behtar hai ki main khud ki jaan le loon….kya main galat hoon ? ”

“toh tum kahna chahte ho ki tum humse…yaha baithe har shaks se behtar ho kyunki tum nonveg nahi khate….hmmm….tab toh mujhe afsos ke sath kahna padega ki tumhari soch kitni chhoti hai”

David ke aisa bolte hee mere bagal me baithe Varun ne mera hath dabaya ,yani ki wo indirectly mujhse kah raha tha ki main David ko koyi jawab na du…mann toh mera nahi mana lekin socha ki …hatao yar,jane do lavde ke baal ko….
Mere kuch na bolne ka asar positive raha aur David ne aage kuch nahi bola ,shayad Nisha ne bhi uska hath daba liya hoga….aisa maine andaza lagaya…maine gaur kiya ki table par baitha har wo shaks jise main ache se janta tha ya sirf janta tha wo sab bilkul shant the…yani ki aadat ke mutabiq Shipra apna muh nahi fad rahi thi…Sonam Varun se ishq nahi lada rahi thi aur Nisha mujhse baat nahi kar rahi thi aur David… jab se main aaya hoon tab se wo ya toh sirf mujhe ghoore ja raha tha ya meri harqato par comment pass kar raha tha…khair ,main use nahi janta isliye uske bare me kuch nahi bol sakta lekin baki teen…wo,itne chup kyun the….aur ye BKL David mujhe kyun ghoore ja raha hai….abhi lawda fek ke marunga toh pura khandan chud jayega…..aur jab maine apna dimag daudaya toh dekha ki Shipra David ko kuch ishara kar rahi thi…jiske baad David ne mujhse turant ek sawal kiya….

“tum ek engineer ho”

“Mechanical Engineer…”

“tum kaam kaha karte ho”

“Sharda Vihar”

“ye kaha hai”

“sorry….Sharda Enterprise…”

“kamaal hai,maine toh aajtak name bhi nahi suna”kahte hue David hasne laga aur uske sath Nisha , Shipra aur Sonam bhi has di aur tab mujhe samajh aaya ki ye darasal in charo ki milibhagat hai….

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“acha toh ab puri kahani samajh aayi mujhe….maine Sonam ki insult ki…phhir Shipra ki insult ki aur Nisha ki toh main aaye din karta hee rahta hoon aur ye teeno mujhe aaj tak jawab nahi de payi isliye inhone David ke sath milkar mujhe neecha dikhane ka plan banaya hai…ab samajh me aayi ye kahani….Sonam aur Shipra ka toh samajh me aata hai,lekin Nisha bhi…… that’s why I hate everyone”Nisha ki taraf dekhte hue maine socha…..
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mujhe ab bhi yakin nahi ho raha tha ki Nisha aisa kar sakti hai…..khair yahi toh antar hai mere jaise yugpurush me aur in jaise chhote insano me….kahi isme Varun bhi toh shamil nahi hai ….? Maine Varun ki taraf dekha toh wo is samay thoda gusse me tha ,jiski vazah shayad yahi thi ki David ka yun mera Mazak banaya jana ,use kuch khas pasand nahi aaya tha….yani ki jaise Nisha ne mujhe chutiya banaya tha waisich Varun ko Sonam ne chutiya banaya tha…aur tabhi mujhe apni wo baat yaad aayi jisme maine kaha tha ki…Girlfriend- ye ek word hee kafi hai un logo ko jalane ke liye jinke paas ye nahi hai aur ye ek word hee kafi hai un logo ko dilasa dene ke liye jo iske chakkar me chutiya bane hai…aur yaha wo chutiye main aur Arun…matlab main aur Varun the…..
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“tum aksar shant kyun ho jate ho…kahi tumhe aisa toh nahi lagta ki main tumhara Mazak uda raha hoon ,actually main aisa hee hoon….main dil ki baat jubaan par le hee aata hoon….tum chaho toh Sharda Enterprise chhodkar ,mere sath meri company me kaam kar sakte ho….aur tumhari salary hogi 30000 per month….mujhe nahi lagta ki Sharda Enterprise tumhe isase jyada salary degi”

“thirty thousands per month….yuck….itne me tohmeri naukrani bhi kaam na kare”bolkar Shipra has padi aur main khud ko control karne laga ki nahi beta Arman…nahi…in logo ke muh nahi lagna inhe kya pata teri mahanta ke bare me….
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Maine us waqt jab Shipra mujhpar has rahi thi toh gaur kiya ki Varun ne mera hath chhod diya tha yani ki wo ab chahta tha ki main un sabko jawab du…lekin maine apne mann ko bhatkaya aur apne hee khayalo me kho gaya…is beech Varun bahana markar waha se jana bhi chaha lekin Sonam ne use apni kasam dekar use rok liya….pata nahi wo log Varun ko kyun rok rahe the…kyunki khushi toh unhe meri bezzati karne se mil rahi thi….

“Arman tumne jawab nahi diya ki…tum meri company join karoge ya nahi….”

“done…tees hazar me done…thank you…yugpurush_arman@india.com me call letter bhej dena… ab khush”

“peon ki post hai….manzoor hai kya”kahte hue David has diya….Sonam aur Shipra bhi hasi lekin main sirf Nisha ko dekh raha tha….wo bhi is samay mand-mand muskura rahi thi....wo kayi baar toh apni hasi rok leti lekin kayi baar uski hasi aisi mand-mand muskano ke roop me samne aa jati thi….jise dekhkar main bhi muskura deta tha….

“toh tum taiyar ho meri company me subah-sham jhadu marne ke liye…”

“sorry…darsal baato hee baato me main kahi aur khoya hua tha , you know… ek busy person ke paas faltu logo ki baato ko sunne ka time nahi hota lekin phhir bhi wo faltu tuchiye log bakar-bakar karte rahte hai toh mujhe unki haan me haan milana padta hai…abhi tak main wahi kar raha tha lekin ab main pure tarike se yahi hoon aur kuch der rahunga bhi toh jo puchhna hai ab puchho….chalo start karo puchhna”

“tum jhooth bol rahe ho…tumne humari sari baate dhyan se suni aur uska jawab bhi diya lekin ab bol rahe ho ki tum kahi khoye hue the….ye kaise mumkin hai”Shipra boli 

“MTL hoon main yani ki multi talented ladka…ye toh kuch bhi nahi main toh khoye-khoye tujhe ek jhapad bhi maar sakta hoon , jiske baad tu bhi kho jayegi… try karegi”

“Shipra ko chhodo ,mujhse baat karo…..newton ka third law lagao aur humne tum par jo action liya hai uska reaction do…newton ka third law…jante bhi ho ya nahi…kamal hai…science ke student hokar third law of newton nahi jante….main batata hoon every action has equal and opposite reaction….”

“wow David…. You are so smart…mujhe ye rule likh kar do na…taki main bhi Arman ko ye rule bol saku”David ki taraf dekhkar Shipra boli

“actually, main khoya hua tha ek facebook post me….maine kal facebpook me ek post dekha tha… ek image….koyi jpeg file thi shayad…jo ki kisi nami page ne post kiya tha...jisme do image ko combine kiya gaya tha….ek image thi om sybol ki…om matlab om…shankar bhagwan wala om”hawa me om banate hue maine kaha“aur dusari image par number likha gaya tha 786….aur us image ke upar likha gaya tha ki om ke liye like kare aur ***** ke liye comment…dekhte hai kaun jeet-ta hai…yakin nahi manoge us page par barah lakh logo ne like kiya tha aur shayad itne hee logo ne comment…. Maine us pic ko dekha aur usme like aur comment ho rahi sankhya ko dekhkar mere mann me vichar aaya ki kitna free time hai logo ke paas….upar se yadi comment section me jao toh aise aise shabd ek dusare ke religion par kiye hote hai ki unhe main bata nahi sakta…bata nahi sakta kya…main toh soch bhi nahi sakta….bas isi vazah se mujhe socially hona pasand nahi hai kyunki main aksar logo se disappoint ho jata hoon… ab aaj ke dinner ko dekh lo, main jab se aaya hua hoon tab se tum log mera Mazak uda rahe ho, lekin maine kuch kaha….nahi na ….kyunki main janta hoon ki tum logo ki aukat hee yahi hai…group me baithkar kisi ki hooting karna….i just hate everyone…aur David , tu mujhe Shri newton ka third law padha raha hai…abey ullu yadi tune apne 8th semester ki book….sorry 8th semester kaha se aa gaya, teri toh aukat hee nahi ki tu Engineering ke 8th semester tak pahuch paye…yadi tune apne school ki class 8th ki science ki book ko thik dhang se padha hota toh tujhe samajh aata ki newton ke third law me action aur reaction alag-alag body par hota hai lekin tu….tune toh naya rule hee nikal diya…action aur reaction ko ek hee body par thok kar…tujhe toh award milna chahiye…chutiya award…ya phhir ghanta award…ye hua first point….aur dusara point ye ki tune newton ke third rule ke base par mujhse kya bola ki main tujhe apna reaction doon….abey gandul, newton chacha ne kaha tha ki action aur reaction alag-alag time par nahi…usi samay hota hai….toh yadi maine usi samay , jab tum log mera Mazak uda rahe the ya Mazak udane ki koshish kar rahe the toh yadi usi samay main tumlogo ko ek-do mukka mashak deta ya phhir tum logo ke muh me thook deta tab wo hota newton ke third law wala reaction….isliye agali baar se ye rule kahi ghusadne se pahle yaad rakhna ki Shri Arman ne kya kaha tha….BC tum jaise log hee ,bachpan me 2+2 ke jawab me 6,7 likhkar aksar murga bana karte ho….aur Shipra tujhe newton ka third rule chahiye….taki tu mujhe bata sake….tujhe pata hai, tum jaisi ladkiyo ko dekhkar main kya sochta hoon….main sochta hoon ki….tumlog is duniya me kyun aayi…matlab koyi career nahi…koyi knowledge nahi…tum jaise…tum jaisi se matlab tum teeno jaisi ladkiya bas baap ke paise ke dum par 23-24 saal tak aish karti hai phhir shadi kar leti hai….bas life khatm….BC isase achchhi life toh River View Colony ka kutta-Bisleri jeeta hai…kyunki afterall uski koyi respect hai…uska koyi role hai…tum logo ka kya role hai ?…baap ke paise par aish karna…? Tum logo ko zara sa bhi andaza hai ki tum logo ko dekhkar tumhare maa-baap kya sochte honge ? apne dosto ke samne kitni sharam aati hogi unhe ye bolne me ki…meri beti, kuch nahi karti…wo toh bas chhachhundar ke mafiq idhar se udhar din bhar ghumte rahti hai….shame on you, girls….shame on you….”kahkar maine ek lambi saans li aur pani peene laga….paani peene ke baad maine ek Dakar mari aur Shipra ki taraf dekhkar bola“aur janeman, kya haal hai….aglI baar kisi padhe likhe ko le aana mujhse muqabala karne ke liye…toh main chalu, ya kisi aur ko koyi aur baat karni hai…Nisha…?Sonam….?Shipra…..? itni shant kyun ho tum teeno…lagta hai mere baaton ko tumne dil pe le liya…dil pe hee lena warna kahi aur logi toh kahi aur se baat bahar niklegi…badi aayi, third law of newton explain karne wali…. toh main chalu….David bhaiya ? main jaun ya aap mujhe koyi aur naya offer denge ya koyi science ke rule samjhana chahe toh main ruk sakta hoon…basharte aapne un rules ko ek anpadh…bepakal insaan ki tarah na padha ho….”

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Meri baat ka waha baithe sabhi logo ne bur maan liya tha aur Varun ke reaction ko dekh-kar mujhe ahsas hua ki maine jyada bol diya hai….Shipra ki halat toh rone jaisi ho gayi thi…Sonam aur Nisha bhi gumsum gumsum thi….

“dekha ho gaya na kabada…mujhe chhedte hee kyun ho, phhir..mana ki currently main version 3.0 par chal raha hoon…lekin iska matlab ye thodi hai ki Version 2.0 ke ek bhi features nahi honge…mere dimag me version 1.0 aur 2.0 ka backup hai…jise main jab chahu tab install karke tum sabki fad sakta hoon..that’s Shri Arman for you…bitches”

“main soch raha tha ki ” un sabka kaam tamaam karne ke baad main waha se jaane ke liye khada hee hua tha ki David bol pada“Arman tum baat kar rahe the kisi fb pic ki, jisme kisi famous page ne kuch objectionable material post kiya tha ,jiske karan tumne us post ko like karne wale ,us post me comment karne wale lakho logo ko galat samajh liya….ye kis hadd tak sahi hai…kya yahi tumhari aukat hai….kya tumhari thinking itni giri hui hai ki tumne us page par like,comment karne wale sabhi logo ko galat maan liya…jabki galti sirf us pic ko post karne wale ki thi…tumhe pata hai humare uchi society me log tum jaise insaan ko kya kahte hai…narrow minded…iska matlab bhi pata hai tumhe…narrow minded…”

“abhi tune thodi der pahle science ka rule mujhse pucha tha, usase santusti nahi hui kya…jo tu ab science se koodkar English me aa gaya….abey tune mujhe samajh kya rakha hai…khair jaane do…”

“ok leave it…lekin tu ye toh zaroor manega na ki tu narrow minded hai… tum jaise log hee terriorist jaisi chizo ko badhawa dete hai”

“lol…gay please”

“let me finish… tum ek baar socho aur phhir mujhe batao ki galti kiski thi…us fb post me…use post karne wale ki ya use like/comment karne wale ki”

“dono ki… darasal mera aisa manna hai ki….chutiya banana buri baat nahi hai, chutiya banna buri baat hai….sorry lesbians for my foul language… kya karu, dialogue book me yahi likha tha ”

“toh tum ye kahna chah rahe ho ki us pic ko like karne wala har shaks chahe wo chhota ho ya bada…chahe wo nasamajh hee kyun na ho…wo sab bure hai…ab ye mat kahna ki unme se koyi innocent nahi raha hoga…”

“bahut ho gaya,ye vad-vivad…main chalta hoon”ghadi me time dekhte hue maine kaha…

“toh tum haar gaye…”

“nahi”

“toh phhir ise complete karke jao….jise tumne shuru kiya hai…warna apni haar swikar karo aur hum sabse dus-dus baar sorry bolo”
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Chapter-9 : Deterioration of Brain
“hmmmm….lagta hai tum logo ko completely finish karna padega….taki aaj ke baad mere samne khade hote hee tumhara paani nikal jaye….”wapas baith kar main bola“toh kaha the hum…haan us fb post par…jaha tumhare according kuch innocent log bhi the jinko duniyadari ki samajh nahi thi……toh yadi deeply analyse kiya jaye humari baato ko toh tum yahi dekhoge ki tum ek-do ache insan ke avaj me sau bure logo ko bacha rahe ho aur main sau bure loge ke karan us ek ache insan ko bhi nahi baksha raha… aur yadi aur deeply analyse kiya jaye humari baato ko toh tum paoge ki hum dono hee galat hai….par tum mujhse jyada galat ho….darasal main ye kahna chah raha hoon ki hum sabhi galat hote hai par sawal ye hai ki kaun jyada aur kaun kam….aur rahi baat us ek ache insan ki toh….. ye toh natural law hai…gehu ke sath ghun bhi chudta hai….so shut the Ferrous uranium….i mean fuck up”


Dusare din subah subah mere mobile par Nisha ka sms aaya ki….aaj ke baad wo meri shakl bhi nahi dekhna chahti hai….maine ye baat Varun ko batayi toh wo thoda sad ho gaya…afterall dosti toh nibhani hee thi aur usi dosti ke karan Varun sad hone ka natak kar raha tha….ya sachmuch me sad tha ?…mujhe nahi pata…maine mobile me aaya hua sms Varun ko dikhaya…toh wo bola

“kal raat bahut reaction pe reaction pel raha tha na, ab jhel ye reaction….ab ro baithkar”

Jiske jawab me maine kuch nahi kaha aur table par rakhe goggle ke sath cigarette ke packet ko uthakar balcony ki taraf chup-chap aa gaya…maine cigarette jalayi aur kash marne hee wala tha ki mujhe yaad aaya ki procedure toh ye nahi hai…procedure ke mutabiq mujhe pahle goggle pahanna chahiye uske baad phhir cigarette jalani chahiye….maine jali hui cigarette ko kuch der dekha aur phhir balcony se neeche fek kar goggle lagaya aur dusari cigarette jalaya….

“hat BC , bahut rahis hoon main…mujhe kisi ki zaroorat nahi hai…”

“kamal hai, Shri Arman bhi udas hote hai…mujhe laga tha ki ye pyar….mohabbat ke chutiyape me padkar tu kabhi udas nahi hoga”room ke andar se hee mujhe taana marte hue Varun bola“chal thand rakh…Sonam se baat karke tera patch up karwa dunga main”

“abey, main wo nahi soch raha , jo tu soch raha hai ki main soch raha hoon…main toh isliye udas hoon kyunki ye bhi koyi tareeka hai break up karne ka…ki bas ek sms kar diya aur break up…mera matlab koyi gali nahi koyi galauch nahi…ye toh insult hai meri…mujhe dekh maine kitne style se Aradhna se break up kiya tha aur utne hee style se Esha ne mere sath….lekin Nisha ne toh KAPD kar diya..”

“acha toh tu chahta hai ki ,Nisha pure society me announce kare ki usne tujhe apni zindagi se nikal feka hai”

“ye sab chhod… wo tu kya bol raha tha ki Sonam ke through tu mera patch up karwa dega…yadi aisa hai toh main abhich Sonam ko sorry bolne ke liye taiyar hoon…wo bhi live….bol kya bolta hai”Varun ki taraf cigarette aur lighter fek kar main bola “soch le…tera kitna name hoga…log kahenge… gaur se dekhiye is shaks ko…yahi hai wo shaks ,jisne Shri Arman se sorry bulwaya ,wo bhi ek ladki ko….log toh tere diwane ho jayenge aur ladkiya tera lund chusane ke liye tere peeche bhagengi….aur tera boss….tujhe”

“ho gaya na be….”meri baat ko beech me katkar Varun ne kaha“chal main try karta hoon…lekin pahle tu Sonam ko call karke sorry bol”

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Maine apne mobile ka front camera on kiya aur video recording start karke sorry bola lekin mujhe usme kuch khalipan sa laga yani ki kuch adhoora adhoora sa…aur jab maine aas pass dekha toh mujhe samajh aaya ki maine goggle nahi pahna hai…kamal hai , mujhe jaha tak yaad hai , usme toh maine abhi do minute pahle hee goggle pahna tha..phhir ye kaise mumkin hai ? anyway maine goggle pahna aur ek baar phhir se video mode me camera on kiya..

“hiii…Sonam…Good morning…may god give you all the good and bad things you want today and sorry for last night…I know you and your beautiful ,intelligent friends will give me mercy…ok bye, have a bad day…I mean good day…love you from Varun” video record karke maine mobile Varun ki taraf fek kar kaha“is video ko jaha bhejna hai bhej de….main chala Sharda Enterprises ”


Kal raat ko David ke dinner aur subah Nisha ke break up messege ke karan main ek baat toh bhool hee gaya tha…jo ki is samay mere liye sabse jyada important thi …wo ye ki kal mujhe River View Colony ke bahar jo Rathi mam milI thi wo haqiqat me thi ya wo mere dimag ka koyi jhol tha…yadi wo mera vaham hua toh phhir thik hai…lekin yadi wo sach me Rathi mam niklI toh phhir main toh gaya kaam se….
Sharda Vihar pahuch kar main chupchap apni seat par jakar virajman ho gaya aur mere virajman hone ke kuch samay baad hee mere computer ke paas rakha telephone baj utha….aur jaisa ki mujhe ummid thi call Rathi ki thi…usne mujhe apne cabin me aane ka nyota diya…jiske baad maine soch liya ki “ yadi aaj jyada hawa me udegi toh isko bhi zameen pe le aaunga…. bhad me gayi naukari….Shri Arman ko naukari ki kami hai kya….huh”

Ms.Rathi ke cabin me ghuste hee mere hosh udd gaye kyunki aaj wo jo tight dress pahan kar aayi thi use dekhte hee nano second me mera lund tight ho gaya…waise toh Ms.Rathi ko maine aaj tak sirf formal me dekha tha lekin aaj wo pata nahi kaun sa dress pahan kar aayi thi…jisme kandhe tak toh kuch tha hee nahi aur kamar ke paas elliptical shape me uski dress ka kuch hissa gayab tha…jis-se Rathi mam ki gori…chikni kamar ka kuch hissa mujhe dikh raha tha… mera sara gussa Ms.Rathi ko dekhkar chhoo-mantar ho gaya…aaj Rathi mam kuch jyada hee saj sawar kar aayi thi…isliye main bahut der tak bina hile dule…bina saans liye ektak sirf aur sirf use dekhta raha…mera matlab…isko chodne ko pa jaun toh mera jeewan safal ho jaye…lekin ye janeman ,aaj formal dress me kyun nahi aayi….kya Sharda Enterprises ke kayde ispar lagu nahi hote….yahi fayda hai manager hone ka…

“tumhare kal ki badtameezi ke liye main tumhe baad me sabak sikhaungi…filhal mujhe abhi Sharda Enterprise ke General Manager Shivakant Sehgal ko receive karne jana hai…isliye main abhi jaa rahi hoon aur khabardar yadi kal ki tarah samay se pahle ya kisi ko inform kiye bina gaye toh”kahte hue Ms.Rathi ne apna bag uthaya aur waha se chalti bani….aur meri nazar unke matakte hue gand aur kamar par ja atki….jiske baad mere muh se anayas hee kuch shabd Rathi mam ki tariff me nikal pade

“tujhe na chodu toh chain mujhe aata nahi hai,
Ek tere siwa koyi aur lund ko bhata nahi hai…”

Rathi mam ke jaane ke baad main wapas apni jagah par aakar baith gaya, jaha office me kaam karne wala peon jo ki meri hee umra ka tha meri table par chay rakhte hue bola…

“kya , Arman bhau…kidhar chale gaye the tum kal….Rathi madam bhadak relI thi bahut”

“tu mujhse aap kahkar baat kiya kar be…warna kisi din pel dunga…samjha”

“kya Arman bhau…apun ko laga ki apun dono firand hai…isliye aapko tum bola,warna ricard hai Jagat ka ki,usne kabhi is office me kisi sahib aur madam ko bhav tak nahi diya”

“ye kya hai be…thandi chay leke aaya hai…ja dusari leke aa”

“are kya bhau…thik hai apun laata hai,lekin aapko apun ka ek kaam karna padega”bolkar Jagat ne pahle idhar udhar dekha aur phhir dheere se bola“mujhe wo walI fillum chahiye”

“bhag lawde yaha se…warna abhi shikayat kar dunga”

“kya bhau…bhav kha rele ho…do na”

“chal beta kalti ho ja…”

Mujhe Sharda Vihar me kaam karne se koyi dikkat nahi thi balki Sharda Vihar aur Rathi mam ki badaulat main aksar bore hone se bach jaya karta tha lekin iska nuksan bhi tha ,wo ye ki office me kaam na hone ki vazah se main bore bhi hone lagta tha aur ye jo boring word hai, isase main duniya me sabse jyada nafrat karta hoon…insano se bhi jyada.

Yahi haal aaj ka bhi tha,balki aaj haal kuch jyada hee behal tha…baki din toh Rathi mam ki gand ka sahara bhi tha ,lekin aaj toh wo bhi nahi thi…I mean aaj toh lawda… lawde hee lag gaye…upar se Vandana mam ki dhamki alag…Vandana mam se pichha kaise chhudaya jaye ? aisa kya karu ki Vandana mam wo wali baat puri tarah se bhool jaye…

Inhi pareshaniyo se joojhate hue main chair par pura pasar gaya aur upar chhat ki taraf dekhne laga…chhat se mera matlab hai ceiling…maine dekha ki ceiling ek do jagah se crack hai aur ek jagah usme shayad black ya green color ka daag bhi tha….mujhe karne ko kuch toh tha nahi ,isliye main us daag ko hee dekhne laga aur jaise-jaise main use dekhta gaya ,mere dimag me kayi aakritiya aane lagi wo ceiling ka hara dhabba chamakne laga aur uski chamak itni tez thi ki meri aankho me chubh rahi thi….kayi aakritiya mujhe ceiling par madrati hui dikhayi di….maine us chamakte hare rang se honi wali chubhan ko rokne ke liye apni aankh band kar li…lekin meri aankh ab bhi chubh rahi thi jaise maine apni aankh band hee na ki ho…mera pura sharir bahut jor se kanpne laga….itni jor se ki mere dono hath pair buri tarah kaanp rahe the aur daant aapas me takra rahe the..main apni aankhe kholkar ye dekhna chahta tha ki BC ye kya bala hai lekin jab maine apni aankhe kholi toh main kahi aur tha…maine apni aankh kholi toh paya ki main toh apne ghar me tha…jaha mujhe Vipin bhaiya ki aawaz sunayi de rahi thi…

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“papa,aapne Arman ko kaha tha ki wo Varun ke sath na ghoome lekin maine kal Varun ke sath hee Arman ko dekha tha bus-stop par…..”

“uthne de usko ,abhi batata hoon main…”ek kadak aawaz ke sath mere papa ji ne kaha ,jo mere kaano tak bhi pahuchi…..

“subah se hee shuru ho gaye ye baap-bete…pata nahi kya dushmani hai mujhse”badbadate hue maine bistar chhoda 

Us din jyada kuch khas nahi bola mere papa ne…bas mujhe ek bar aur warning di ki main yadi Varun ke sath ghoomte ya baat karte hue paya gaya toh meri aisi-taisi kar denge…..pata nahi kya problem hai in sabko Varun se ? khair main taiyar hua calender me taarikh dekhi….23 sept. 2009 

“bhai yar , tujhe ek baat batani hai…”prayer ke dauran apne aage baithe Varun ko kochakte hue main bola

“Bulla bhai ,idhar hee round maar rahe hai aur unhone tujhe mujhse baat karte hue dekh liya toh, wo tujhe toh kuch nahi kahenge lekin mujhe thapadiyate hue kahenge ki nalayak disturb karta hai…school ke sabse ache ladke ko….”bina peeche mude Varun ne kaha

“sun toh sahi”

“na bhai…”

“bhag sale…ab bolna ki Reema se setting karwa de…”

“kaun se jamane me jee rahe ho gurudev…Reema se meri setting ek mahine pahle hee ho chuki hai…kal hee toh bataya tha tujhe ki maine use uske ghar jakar kiss kiya hai”

“yani ki last time main ek mahine pahle aaya tha”badbadate hue maine apni aankh band ki aur prayer me wapas lag gaya….

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Ye shayad dusari ya teesari baar tha jab main apne version 1.0 me pahucha tha…aur main ye janne ko bahut utsuk ho chuka tha ki kya main yaha jo bhi karunga kya wo mera past change kar dega aur kya mujhe mere ateet ki dusari hee kahani bayan karega…mera matlab yadi maine abhi apne hath ko chaku se kaat liya toh kya next time jab main yaha aaunga toh kya mere hath me chaku ka wo nishan rahega ya phhir aise hee sirf aaj tak ke liye hee wo nishan simit rahega...23 sept. 2009 mujhe ache se yaad hai ki aaj ke din recess time me meri hee class ka ek launda bathroom me cigarette peete hue pakdayega jiske baad uski khoob pelayi hogi….isliye mere paas bahut se mauke the ye check karne ke liye ki yadi main yaha koyi changes karu toh haqiqat me kya hoga…..

“haan ab bol…ki kya bol raha tha prayer ke time…”prayer hall se class ki taraf aate hue Varun ne mujhse puchha

“main tujhse kahna chahta hoon ki…ki……nahi yar tu sochega ki main tujhe bewkoof bana raha hoon…jo ki main tujhe hardum banata hoon ”

“bolega bhai”

“main tujhse kahna chahta hoon ki main is waqt se nahi hoon….matlab main Arman hee hoon lekin pata nahi main yaha kaise achanak aa jata hoon..”

“chal be…subah se kuch aur nahi mila kya…kal tu class me mujhe bol raha tha ki tu future dekh sakta hai aur aaj bol raha hai ki tu future se hee aaya hai…”

“abey kal maine waise hee kah diya hoga ,sixth sense ke dum par….lekin aaj main sachmuch me future se aaya hoon”

“aisa toh phhir ye bata ki”class me baithe laundo ki taraf dekhte hue Varun ne puchha“aaj kise bulla class ke bahar bhejega”

“abey ye chindi sawal mujhse tu kyun puch raha hai…main tujhe bade kand ki information deta hoon…wo bhaisa hai na C section me”

“kaun wo kariya…jisase kutte ki tarah baas aati hai”

“haan wahi…kariya…wo aaj lunch ke samay cigarette peete hue pakda jayega,jiske baad school ke sare teacher use gher kar marenge aur ”mera itna bolna tha ki aas-paas ki deewaro me vibration hona shuru ho gaya…jisase main samajh gaya ki ab mera ant samay aa gaya hai...lekin itni jaldi ?…pichhali baar toh kafi time tak main yaha tha. Ab main ye kaise maloom karunga ki yaha change kiya hua incident vastav me bhi change hota hai ya nahi….

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Initially mera plan ye tha ki main recess me us ladke ko bathroom me cigarette peene nahi dunga jisase wo na toh teachers ki pakad me aayega aur na hee school me halla hoga aur next time jab main yaha aaunga toh Varun se puchh lunga ki kya wo launda cigarette peete hue pakdaya tha….ispar yadi Varun ka jawab na rahega toh main samajh jaunga ki cheeze badal rahi hai lekin yadi Varun ne haan kaha toh samajh jaunga ki mera yun yaha aana sirf aaj ke liye valid hai…main jo karunga wo sirf aaj tak ya phhir kahe ki sirf mere dimag tak hee simit rahega… in sabka vastavikta se koyi lena dena nahi hai aur phhir River view colony me jakar Varun se finally confirm kar lunga…warna directly puchhne se wo mujhe pagal samjhega…lekin abhi achanak vibrate hoti dewaro ne mera sara plan chaupat kar diya tha ye aisa tha jaise ki prakriti mujhse kah rahi ho ki…. na munna na…tum jo ho chukka hai use badal nahi sakte….

“Varun sun dhyan se…2011 me India world cup jeetegi lekin 2015 me semi final me haar jayegi…ab tu ye yaad rakhna…chal jaldi se bol ke dikha”

“2011 me india world cup jeetegi lekin 2015 me semi final me haar jayegi…”

“right…bas tu ye yaad rakhna aur next time main tujhse jab bhi puchhu toh mujhe bata dena…aur sale agli baar jab Reema ke ghar jayega toh dhyan se kand karna kyunki uska bhai tum dono ko pakad lega aur Gandhi jayanti ke agle din Bulla surprice test le….le…leeee….lega”apna sar dabate hue main bola“isliye taiyari kar lena kyunki Bulla hum dono ko alag……alag…….”
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“iski maa ka….koyi zandu balm lao be” haqiqat me aakar apne sar ko dono hath se thok kar main bola

mere dimag ki ulool zalool harqato ke karan hee main aajkal vartman samay me honi wali kayi ghatnao ko yaad nahi rakh pa raha tha aur kisi bhi chiz ko mujhe bar-bar remind karna padta tha jaise ki aaj taarikh kaun si hai…aaj din kaun sa hai…abhi thodi der pahle kya hua tha….kal kya hua tha. Yani ki mere common sense ki aajkal full baji padi thi aur aisa hee kuch abhi ho raha tha…maine aankh band karke kuch der tak socha aur tab mujhe samajh aaya ki main is waqt Sharda Vihar me hoon aur mere samne ye ladka jo mobile hath me pakde hue khada hai uska name Jagat hai….

“Jaggu…ek cup”ungali dikhate hue maine use kaha…jiske thodi der baad hee Jagat chay lekar aa gaya

“wo yogi ji bol rahe hai ki apna mail dekh lo…”

Maine Jagat ke hath se chay ka cup liya aur bina kuch responce diye apna mail kholne laga…lekin Jagat wahi khada raha…

“Arman sir…wo wali video do na”

Aur uske itne bolte hee maine gusse se bhari tirachhi nazar se use dekha jiske baad wo chup chap waha se khisak liya……chay ki siskiya….. mera matlab chay ki chuskiya lete hue maine mail se juda attachment download kiya jisme machine parts se related dimensions vagerah thi…..

“hat behanchod”eka-ek us attachment ko close karte hue main bola“ab ye mujhe chodna sikhayenge…”lekin phhir dusare hee pal maine attachment ko khola aur kaam par lag gaya 
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Sharda Vihar se room aate waqt mera mobile baja…auto itna pelam-pel bhara hua tha ki mujhe apna mobile nikalne me kafi dikkat ho rahi thi aur mobile nikalne ke dauran mera hath mere bagal me baithi ek ladki ke jaangh se touch ho gaya….mujhe use sorry kahna chahiye tha, lekin mobile nikalne ki jaldbazi me maine use kuch bhi nahi kaha…jisase shayad wo bur maan gayi aur wo boli….

“idiot…andha hai kya”

“haan ,bol Varun”us ladki ko bina koyi jawab diye main bola lekin Varun shayad kisi se baat kar raha tha jisase mujhe kuch background aawaze sunayi di….

“ye article ,Mishra ko de dena aur bolna ki maine bhijwaya hai aur….aur Ganga-Jamuna wala article yahi rakh do…pahle main check karunga…ab tum jao”

“bolega be….”

“haan Arman…ek khushkhabri hai tere liye”

“bak”

“Sonam tere sorry wale video se bahut khush hui aur usne Nisha ko mana liya hai…aur unhone bhi tujhe sorry bola hai”

“pakka”

“haan…”

“chal phhir ,bye…abhi auto me hoon toh aawaz saaf nahi aa rahi”Maine call disconnect ki aur mypics pe jakar Nisha ki photo par click kiya 

“idhar dekh oye…”thodi der pahle mujhe idiot aur andha kahne wali ladki ko aawaz dete hue maine kaha“ye meri girlfriend hai,jise main bhav tak nahi deta…ab khud ko dekh”front camera on karke uski photo usi ko dikhate hue maine kaha…“khud ko dekh aur compare kar meri girlfriend se…tujhe lagta hai ki main jaan buchkar waisi harkat karunga…matlab jab mere paas five star hotel ka ras malayi hai toh main ek third class dahi bade par apna hath kyun marunga… tujh jaisi ladkiyo ko main dekhta toh kya thookta bhi nahi hoon…aur ab chup hee rahna warna aisi bezzati karunga ki itni garmi me body se paseene ki jagah aansu niklenge…got it”

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Auto me baithi us laundiya ko bhapka dekar main colony ki taraf badha…waisi toh mujhe abhi bahut problems thi lekin sabse badi jo problem thi wo ye ki kaun si problem sabse badi hai….? mere dimag ka yun ajeeb harqat karna…ya Nisha se mera breakup ya phhir Vandana mam ki dhamki…main kispe jyada concentrate karu…kisko pahle solve karu aur kaise solve karu ?

Vandana Rathi ne aaj mujhe office me warning dekar meri tension aur badha di thi aur mujhe aisa lag raha tha jaise ki ab mera dimag fat jayega... .main toh aaj Vanadana mam se milne ke pahle tak yahi soch raha tha k kal sham ko office se aate waqt meri jo unse River View colony ke bahar mulaqat hui thi wo mera hallucination tha lekin aaj Enterprises jakar pata chala ki wo hallucination nahi balki sach tha…main sach me Vandana Rathi se kal Colony ke bahar mila tha… lekin wo yaha kya kar rahi thi ? par gaur karne wala jo mudda tha wo ye ki pahli baar maine kisi real incident ko bhram mana tha , mujhe toh kal pura yakin tha ki Rathi mam se meri asal me koyi mulaqat hee nahi hui thi…


“toh iska matlab ye hua ki halat aur kharab hote ja rahe hai, ab mujhe haqiqat aur apne dimag ke dhokhe ko pahchan karne me bhi dikkat ho rahi hai…Vandana Rathi toh ab jo karegi , wo karegi hee… lekin ab meri fatne wali hai…mujhe ye ho kya raha hai..pahle neend gayab hui aur ab haqiqat bhi gayab hote ja rahi hai… mujhe ab aage se ahtiyat bartna hoga kisi se baat karte samay….sixth sense ke toh lavde lag hee gaye the ab toh baki bacha kucha sense bhi pata nahi kaha chala gaya ”


Yahi sab sochate-sochate main colony ke gate ki taraf badh raha tha ki meri nazar colony ke park me padi…waisi mere aas-paas kya ho raha hai ,kaun kya kar raha hai…main is par jyada dhyan nahi deta…lekin park ke andar dekhte-dekhte meri nazar ek ladki par atak gayi, jiski umra mere jitney hee rahi hogi…wo ektak mujhe waise hee dekhe ja rahi thi jaise ki main use dekhe ja raha tha…hum dono ki aankhe ek-dusare par bilkul constant thi yani samay ke sath koyi parivartan nahi…..mujhe kuch samay laga us ladki ko pahachan-ne me…aur jab wo mujhe pahchan me aayi toh maine ahiste se apni nazar us-se hatakar samne ki taraf kiya aur teen tak ginti ginkar apne flat ki oor pura dum laga kar bhag khada hua….


“ye toh Aradhna thi BC…ye pakka hallucination hai…hundred percent…lekin kahi wo sach me hui toh ?.......”maine khud se sawal puchha aur phhir khud par hee jhalla kar kaha“bitch please….usko mare hue ek saal ho chuke hai aur use yadi atma ban kar tujhe darana hota toh ek saal ke gap me nahi aati…balki usi samay teri fad deti jab tu college me tha….”

“yani confirm hai ki wo mere dimag ki upaj thi”khud se sawal puchhate hue main badbadaya aur room ka gate kholkar andar aa gaya…

“isme bhi koyi shaq hai kya…jail wale kand bhool gaya kya…shame on you”

“wokay…no problem…main iska koyi na koyi solution nikal hee lunga……yadi time mila toh ”
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“abey Arman , uth…ye had ho gayi be…room ke andar kyun nahi gaya…chal uth”

“kaun hai be..disturb mat kar, warn pelunga…waise bhi neend aati nahi aur jab aati hai toh tum log utha dete ho…mujhe samajh nahi aata tum log ko dikkat kya hai mujhse…na sale chain se jeene dete ho…na chain se sone dete ho…ab kya mar jaun main,tab thandak milegi tum logo ko…”

“abey uth kar dekh toh sahi…tu soya kaha hai…”mujhe wapas jor se hilate hue usne kaha….

Aur abki baar mera matha itni jor se thanka ki main teji se utha aur uthkar seedhe Varun ka collar pakad liya

“bosedk fod dunga,bata raha hoon…aukat me raha kar”hath bandhkar maine use bola…


Ye sab suddenly hua tha ,mujhe ye maloom tha ki samne Varun hai lekin phhir bhi maine aisa kiya matlab maine kiya nahi wo toh aise hee apne aap ho gaya…… mujhe hosh me aane me kuch samay laga…jiske baad main muskurane laga and trust me…mera muskurane ka koyi mann nahi tha…abhi toh bilkul bhi nahi….

“fad acting karta hoon na main”Varun ka collar chhod haste hue maine kaha

“acting…ye sab acting thi…tu room ke bahar sham ko 7 baje ghas par so raha hai aur mere jagane par mujhe marne par utaru ho jata hai aur ab bol raha hai ki…kaisi lagi meri acting”

“ approximately ”bolte hue main phhir muskuraya 


Par wo muskan sirf Varun ka mood thik karne ke liye tha, asal me main andar se bechain hua ja raha tha ki main yaha kaise aaya…maine toh room ka darwaza khud apne hath se khola tha aur kayi cigarette peekar stubs ko dustbin me goal bhi kiya tha…phhir main yaha kaise …kaha aur kab ?

“ab andar chalega, ya yahi ghas par sokar phhir se apni acting dikhayega ”naraz hote hue Varun bola aur andar chala gaya

Varun ke andar jaane ke baad maine ek nazar aas-paas mari aur ye confirm kiya ki koyi mujhe dekh toh nahi raha hai phhir maine achanak hee apne pant ki zib kholkar lund bahar nikala aur bola“aao salo…gand nahi fad diya toh bolna”

Raat hote hee logo ki dinbhar ki mehnat unpar hawi hone lagti hai…lekin mere sath thik iska ulta hota hai , raat ko 11-12 baje mere sharir ke andar energy peak par hoti hai,jaise main kayi ghanto ki neend lekar baitha hua hoon aur aaj bhi kuch aisa hee ho raha tha….khana khane ke baad main bistar par leta hua deewar par tangi ghadi ko dekh raha tha…main second ki sui ko observe kar raha tha...mera mann ho raha tha ki main Varun ko sab bata du…mera mann kar raha tha ki main Varun ko apne us time travel ke bare me bata du, jo aksar mera dimag mujhe karate rahta hai….lekin problem yaha bhi wahi thi ki Varun mera yakin nahi karega aur jaisi aajkal meri harqate hai… waise me Varun toh kya yadi Arun bhi hota toh wo bhi mera yakin nahi karta….Arun kya… main khud nahi karta…lekin tabhi mujhe kuch sujha aur maine Varun se pucha…

“Varun, kya school me maine kabhi tujhe kaha tha ki, main future se hoon…”

“tune toh ye bhi kaha tha ki tu avatar hai kisi bhagwan ka…”apne laptop ki screen ko jhukate hue usne mujhse kaha….

“wo toh maine aise hee kah diya hoga…ye bata kya maine kabhi tujhe kaha tha ki 2011 world cup india jeetegi aur 2015 me india semi final me haar jayegi”

“dekh Arman disturb mat kar…waise hee sala ye Ganga-jamuna ka matter mere hath me dekar meri aisi taisi kar di hai agency walo ne….”

“yani Na…ok, mujhe bas yahi janna tha”


Itna bolkar main wapas deewar par tangi ghadi ko dekhne laga aur har baar jaise-jaise second ki sui hilti main count karte jata….ab mera pura dhyan counting par tha….main hazar-hazar ke sets me counting kar raha tha…taaki counting ekdum correct ho aur mujhe asani ho…maine hazar-hazar ke kayi sets complete kiye aur jab maine thak kar counting band ki toh hazar-hazar ke kul 17 sets the…yani ki 17000 seconds….yani ki sadhe char ghante se bhi adhik samay tak main sirf second ki sui ke movements ko ginta raha…..wow…… fantabulous ! 
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Nisha…mujhe aksar shabd kam pad jate hai is shabd ko describe karne me…main soch me pad jata hoon ki ,kaisi iski tareef karu…jis-se ye khush rahe aur mujhe barabar deti rahe ….main soch me pad jata hoon, kaise aur kya karu ki iska dil na toote ya ise bura na lage aur isi soch-soch me mujhe aksar koyi aisi tarqeeb mil jati hai jisase main, Nisha ki utar deta hoon………..izzat…. matlab mera intention toh sahi rahta hai lekin result sahi nahi nikalta…ab isi samay ko hee le lo….jab aaj Nisha mujhse milne MBD me aayi toh maine use 'hi…' karne ke liye hawa me hath uthaya tha lekin maine 'hi..' nahi kiya maine apna hath upar hawa me uthaya aur Nisha ko middle finger dikha di….ye sab ekdum achanak se hua tha aur iski maine kalpana bhi nahi ki thi…lekin maine ye kiya tha aur paap toh paap hota hai ,chahe jaan buchkar kiya gaya ho ya anjaane me…

“toh ye tarika hai tumhara hi kahne ka…koyi galatfahami me mat rahna ki mujhe tumhari yaad aa rahi thi ya aur kuch…main yaha isliye aayi kyunki mujhe Sonam ne kaha tha…”

“sorry for middle finger…wo main karna nahi chahta tha ,bas suddenly… instantly …mujhse ho gaya…trust me.”

“kal raat tumne thik nahi kiya Arman , tumne hum sabko abuse kiya….”
“wah…tum karo toh cool, hum kare toh fool..I agree ki maine kal raat thik nahi kiya lekin thik toh tum logo ne bhi nahi kiya tha…kya tum logo ka plan mujhe bulakar sabke samne insult karne ka nahi tha…tum logo ne mere khilaf shadyantra racha…tum charo ne milkar mere liye chakravyuh ka nirman kiya…ab maine arjun ke mafiq chakravyuh tod diya toh isme meri kya galti hai…ye toh mera parakram hai…”

“thik hai manti hoon ki , humne tumhe insult karne ka plan banaya tha…lekin ek limit ke andar…lekin tumne toh hadd hee kar di…seedhe hum sabke family members par pahuch gaye tum….do cup cold coffee…”order marte hue Nisha boli…

“ek hee lana main nahi piyunga…”waiter ko aawaz dekar main bola “There is no limit to what I can do…. aur tum logo ne kya kiya, wo Varun , sala mujhe bol raha tha ki main uske office me peon ki naukari kar sakta hoon…tumhari saheliya mujhpar khullam-khulla has rahi thi…ye galat nahi hai…aur kya name hai us bewkoof ka….hmm…Shipra ,wo mujhe newton ka third law padhane wali thi….sorry par ye tumhare liye limit me hoga…mere liye bahut jyada hai aur main katayi bardasht nahi kar sakta ki meri koyi insult kare ,wo bhi mere dost ke samne….mere fans kya sochenge , Aur by the way tumne David ko kya koyi turram khan samajh liya tha jo mere samne le aayi usko…tumhe mere level ka andaza bhi hai ki main kya hoon…main kaun hoon…main bhagwan hoon, mera janam nahi avatar hua hai…main nayi duniya bana sakta hoon…us duniya me sadak,building yaha tak ki insano ko bana sakta hoon…ek ko toh maine bana bhi liya hai…tumhe andaza bhi hai ki main time travel bhi kar sakta hoon apne tez dimag ke through….aur aise me tum mera muqabala karne kise le aayi….us David ko…aur usne field kaun sa chuna…Physics ?. Par tum yaha ye baat karne nahi aayi ho…dar-asal main kahna ye chahta hoon ki galat hum sab hote hai...par sawal ye hai ki kaun kam. Kal dinner ke time par galat tum log bhi the aur galat main bhi tha…”

“toh iska faisala kaise hoga ki,kam galat kaun hai…”coffee ka cup uthakar Nisha ne kaha aur phhir halki halki chuskiya leni lagi…

“jo sorry bol de…jo ki main bol chuka hoon”

“sorry…”cup neeche rakhte hue Nisha boli aur apne purse se paise nikal kar table par rakh di…

“rahne de..main de dunga bill…warna ek naya mudda utha legi ki Arman ,tumne kabhi mujhe coffee bhi pilayi hai…kya”

“sach…”thoda khush hote hue Nisha ne kaha “aaj kafi samajhdar maloom pad rahe ho…”

“haan,kyunki kal sapne me apna jack sparrow aaya tha”


Iske baad Nisha kuch nahi boli aur main use dekhta raha…maine kayi baar Nisha ke behaviour ko observe kiya aur reading note ki jiska mean nikal kar main is nateeze par pahucha ki hum dono hee kitne fake hai…kahne ko toh hum dono boyfriend-girlfriend hai lekin pichhale do-teen mahino se humare beech aisa kuch bhi nahi hua jisase ye lage ki hum dono wakayi me boyfriend-girlfriend hai…maine observe kiya ki Nisha shayad ab ek mauke ki taalash me hai…wo mauka jiske buniyaad par wo mujhse door ja sake...is tarah ab ye relationship puri tarah mujhpar depend karta tha ki main use wo mauka du ya nahi….chhote log hamesha mauke ki taalash karte hai lekin mere jaise brahmand vijeta ,jab jo karna ho…kar dete hai.

“toh main chalu…”jab thodi der tak main kuch nahi bola toh apna bag kandhe me latkate hue wo boli….

“aaj raat ko free ho kya….”

“common Arman, tum toh aise behave kar rahe ho jaise….jane bhi do….haan free hoon…”

“main soch raha tha ki , main tum logo ko ek chhoti si party du…mere job lagne ki khushi me…tum sab ise meri apology bhi samajh sakte ho”

“really…”apni aankhe badi karte hue Nisha boli “mujhe toh yakin hee nahi ho raha hai…Shri Arman aur apology party….”

“kaha na ki kal sapne me Jackie dada aaye the…wahi pirates wale”

“ok…ab mujhe acha lag raha hai…thank you Arman…”uthkar Nisha ne kaha

“fuck you…I mean…love you”

“love you too…Arman….take care”apne hontho par muskan lakar Nisha boli aur waha se chal di

“Sali fake…just like me”

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Chapter-10 : 24 Hours
MBD se nikalkar main colony ki taraf chal pada aur chalta hee raha…bahut der tak chalte rahne ke baad maine gaur kiya ki sadak khatm hee nahi ho rahi hai…raasta to maine apne room tak jaane wala naapa tha par main room nahi pahuch raha tha…room kya ,main toh colony ke gate tak bhi nahi pahuch paya tha aur ab achanak se jis sadak par main chal raha tha wo mere liye anjaan ho gayi thi…main kidhar jaun aur kidhar na jaun mujhe kuch samajh hee nahi aa raha tha…maine apne aas-paas dekha…waha bahut sari sadak ab apne aap ban rahi thi ,jo ki ek-dusare ki same to same copy thi aur ek dusare se randomly kahi se bhi judte ja rahi thi…jinpar se bahut sari gaadiya tez raftaar ke sath gujar rahi thi aur jab koyi gadi tez raftaar ke sath mere paas se gujarti toh mera dimag jhanjhana jata…maine dekha ki in sadko ka koyi normal pattern nahi tha…ye toh bas randomly ek dusare se judati ja rahi hai…kayi sadak toh mere aankho ke samne ban rahi thi…apne aap.jaise kisi ne koyi jadu ki chhadi ghumayi ho aur tabhi mere paas aakar ek school bus ruki…

“abey, Arman…bheeg kyun raha hai…jaldi andar aa…”

“kaun…kya abhi baarish ho rahi hai ”

“abey andar aayega…School nahi jana kya…”

“School…kaun sa school…kya main ek teacher hoon…? aur ye Arman kaun hai..mera name Arman hai ?”

“andar aayega ki nahi tu…”ek dusari kadakdar aawaz mere kaano me padi jiske karan main us aawaz ki taraf dekhe ko mazboor ho gaya…wo school bus ka conductor tha shayad…confirm, wo school bus ka conductor hee tha….ya phhir nahi tha.


Maine apne aap ko wahi khade rahkar upar se neeche tak dekha aur paya ki main ek school uniform me hoon…aur baarish me puri tarah bheeg gaya hoon…lekin ye barsaat kab hui ? aur yadi hui bhi toh mujhe pata kyun chala ? aur ye jhat barabar launde mujhe jaldi se andar kyun aane ke liye kah rahe hai ? inki maa ka… wait….kahi main phhir se toh….shit


“are yar…phhir se past me…pata nahi main real me kaha hoon…”bus ke andar aate hue main gusse se bola 

Mujhe thoda samay laga ye janne me…ki actually mere sath ho kya raha hai.par mujhe chinta is baat ki thi ki main haqiqat me kaha hoon…kyunki mujhe itna toh yaad hai ki Nisha ke jane ke baad main bhi MBD restaurant se bahar nikal aaya tha lekin apne room tak nahi pahucha tha…yani ki main Restaurant aur apne room ke beech kahi behosh pada hua hoon…? 

“BC mujhe yaha se bahar nikalna hoga…warna koyi mere upar gadi chadha kar nikal jayega….”


Maine gaur kiya ki bahar bahut tez baarish ho rahi thi aur us baarish me main bhi bheega hua tha,jiska ahsaas mujhe ab ho raha tha…. yani ki apne aankh me paani dalkar toh main wapas haqiqat me nahi ja sakta tha…kyunki main already pani me bahut bheega hua tha aur ab bhi yahi tha…isliye maine apne sar ko thodi der sahlaya aur mere aage wali seat ke peechhe jo lohe ka handle laga hua tha uspar apna sar de mara…

“kamal hai…kuch nahi hua…lagta hai ,force kam pad gaya” kahte hue maine ek aur baar apna sar us lohe ke handle me de mara lekin nateeza ab bhi wahi tha…aur main ab bhi wahi tha…maine do-teen baar aur try kiya…lekin har baar sirf mera sar hee dard deta…

“kyun be…mutth marne ka side effect ho raha hai kya..jo apna sar baar-baar patak raha hai…”mere bagal wali khali seat me baithkar Varun bola

“tu bhi yahi hai…”

“jaha tu…waha main..”

“gay… waise …aaj date kaun si hai…”

“19th Sept. 2009….”

“ye nahi ho sakta….”apni aankhe fadkar aur full chauk-kar main bola…jiska karan ye tha ki last time jab main yaha aaya tha toh Varun ne mujhe 23 Sept. ki date batayi thi aur aaj wo 19th sept. bata raha tha….yani ki past me past…kya chutiyapa hai yar….

Last time main jab aaya tha toh Varun ko maine ye bataya tha ki ‘ Indian cricket team 2011 me world cup jeetegi aur 2015 me semifinal haar jayegi’…taaki main ye check kar saku ki main past events me interfere kar sakta hoon ya nahi….aur mera plan tha ki jab main agli baar apne School life me Varun se milunga toh us-se ye puchkar confirm kar lunga…lekin ab samay ne apna naya khel shuru kar mujhe aur peeche dhakel diya tha...upar se main yaha kab tak rahunga ye bhi mujhe nahi pata tha…ispar se reality me main kaha pada hua hoon iski mujhe alag hee tension ho rahi thi…

“Arman…”

“hmm….”

“Armaaan…”abki baar thoda cheekh kar Varun ne mera name pukara

“chillata kyun hai be….wo bhi kaan ke paas”

“ek bahut zaroori baat karni hai tujhse…”

“time nahi hai…main khud bahut pareshan hoon…aur ye jhat barabar launde…jo bus me aage baithe hai…wo halla kyun kar rahe hai…inki toh main…”

“sun na bhai…”

“bak…”

“wo Gaurav hai na…Gaurav…”

“D section wala,Gaurav…wahi na tera dost…”

“dost mat bol MC ko…”

“kyun be…kal tak toh tu aksar uski tareef karta rahta tha…aaj kya hua…” apna sar dabate hue Varun ki taraf dekhkar maine puchha…lekin Varun chup raha…


Varun mujhse kuch kahna chahta tha…lekin uski jeebh atak rahi thi. Matlab wo mujhse kah nahi pa raha tha…aur jab wo mujhse nahi kah pa raha tha yani ki abtak toh usne is bare me kisi se jikra tak nahi kiya hoga…
“le kaan me bol de…”apna sar thoda aur Varun ke karib lejakar maine kaha…jiske baad Varun ne apni mutthi bheechi aur bahut speed ke sath ek saans me sab kuch bol gaya…ek saans me ? nahi actually usne ek baar beech me saans liya tha…ya phhir do baar…?

“main kal sham ko cricket khelne gaya tha aur mom-dad bhi ghar par nahi the….main Gaurav ko apna dost manta tha aur wo aksar mere sath mere ghar aaya karta tha…aur kal jab main cricket khelkar ghar wapas lauta toh dekha ki Gaurav ,meri behan Mahi ke sath mere ghar me tha...Gaurav ko yun apne ghar me dekh mujhe ajeeb laga…bahut ajeeb laga..lekin mere kuch puchhane se pahle hee Gaurav boundary koodkar waha se bhag gaya….”
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Do you Remember the first law of friendynamic ? created by me….let me remind you…dost ki maal = dost ki behan…yani ki dono ko line marna mana hai….lekin yaha toh D section wale Gaurav ne jise Varun apna dost manta tha usne sirf line hee nahi mara tha balki aur bhi bahut kuch mara tha…School pahuchkar maine D section me jakar dekha…Gaurav abhi school nahi aaya tha…lekin prayer hall me mujhe Gaurav dikh gaya….mann toh mera usi samay use thokne ka tha lekin phhir maine khud par control kiya aur jab prayer khatm hui toh main Varun ko lekar D section me gaya…waha D section ke aur bhi ladke the…jinme se kuch Gaurav ke dost bhi the….lekin mujhe unse koyi matlab nahi tha aur na hee mujhe unki koyi parvah thi…main…Varun ke sath seedhe Gaurav ki bench ke samne gaya..jaha wo baitha hua tha….mujhe ,Varun ke sath dekhkar Gaurav samajh gaya ki main yaha kyun aaya hoon…


“kaise be..”Gaurav ka thobda pakad kar main bola…

“sorry bhai, galti ho gayi….”dheemi aawaz me Gaurav ne Varun se kaha…

“galti….ye le…”bolkar maine sabke samne Gaurav ko ek tamacha kheechkar diya…


us waqt mujhe pata nahi kya ho gaya tha…jab se maine Gaurav ki is harqat ke bare me suna tha…tab se mera khoon jal raha tha…mujhe aisa laga jaise ki Gaurav ne Varun ki behan ke sath nahi balki meri behan ke sath wo sab kuch kiya ho…aur Gaurav ko waha apne samne dekh main sirf yahi nahi rooka….mere ek tamacha marne ke baad wo mujhe bhi marne ke liye utha…lekin wo thik se khada bhi ho pata us-se pahle hee maine uske seene me ek laat jad di…jis-se Gaurav wahi ladkhada kar peeche neeche gir gaya…aur mujhe maa-bahan ki gali dete hue jor-jor se rone laga…uske rone ki aawaz se main itna jaan gaya tha ki ab school ke teachers zaroor aayenge…yani ki main fasne wala to tha hee toh maine socha ki kyun na ise puri tarah markar khatm kar diya jaye…isliye pahle toh maine neeche gire hue Gaurav ko laato se mara lekin jab mera mann nahi bhara toh hafte hue main bhi neeche baitha aur uska baal pakadkar kheechte hue uska sar zameen par jor se patak diya….jisase uske cheekhne ki aawaz aur bhi tez ho gayi…..lekin main nahi ruka aur uska sar zameen par marta hee raha…aur jab uske mathe se khoon nikalna shuru hua toh maine uske sar ko chhodkar utha 

“Madarchod…Varun tujhe apna bhai mankar apne ghar le jata tha aur tune uski bahan ke sath hee…”bolte hue maine ek laat seedhe Gaurav ke muh me mari…jiske baad uske sar ke sath uske muh se bhi khoon nikalne laga….


Par main thoda hairan tha ki D section me se uska koyi bhi dost mujhe rokne ke liye samne kyun nahi aa raha tha…Gaurav ka koyi bhi dost use bachane ke liye mujhe nahi rok raha tha aur na hee kisi ne ladayi jhagda shant karwane ki koshish bhi ki…yaha tak ke Varun ne bhi mujhe nahi roka aur tab main samjha ki Varun toh yahi chahta tha…wo janta tha ki main friendynamic ke law ke karan bahut jyada gussa ho jaunga aur bina kuch soche-samjhe marte dum tak Gaurav ko marunga…yani ki Varun ne jaan-buchkar bus me wo baat mujhe batayi thi ? toh ye sab Varun ka plan tha ? that’s why ,I hate everyone…..


Maine Gaurav ka pair pakda aur use ghaseet kar class me sabke samne laya aur phhir se neeche baitha aur mukko ki jhadi laga di….is dauran kayi baar mera hath neeche floor par bhi takraya aur mujhe bhi dard hua…kayi jagah se mera bhi hath kat gaya tha aur mere hath se khoon nikal raha tha….lekin main nahi rooka…mujhe toh bas Gaurav ki shakl dikh rahi thi aur dheere-dheere mujhe uski shakl me Gautam ki shakl nazar aane lagi….isliye main use maarta gaya, bas maarta gaya….aur tab tak maarta raha jab tak ki school ke teachers ne aakar mujhe us-se alag nahi kiya…mere principal ne toh mujhe maarne ke liye apna hath bhi utha liya tha….lekin phhir wo rook gaye aur mujhe kuch nahi kiya….BC fattu ,Principal…main uski jagah rahta toh kachar dalta.
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Jab teachers ne milkar mujhe Gaurav se alag kiya toh maine apne hatho par dhyan diya…mera dahina hath buri tarah sooj gaya tha aur zameen me takrane ki wazah se kayi jagah se kat bhi chukka tha aur khoon nikal raha tha….
Gaurav ko turant school wale hospital le gaye aur mujhe Principal ke cabin me ….jaha sabhi teachers mujhpar chilla rahe the…mujhse reason puchh rahe the ki maine aisa kyun kiya….lekin maine ek shabd bhi nahi kaha….jiske baad teachers ne D section ke kuch ladko ko bulaya….

“sir, is ladke se puchhiye….ye D section ka sabse achchha ladka hai… ….ye jhooth nahi bolega…”Principal ke cabin me aaye hue D section ke ek ladke ki taraf ishara karke Shriman Bulla ji ne Principal se kaha….lekin Principal kuch kahte uske pahle hee main bol pada…

“kaun ye….ye aur hoshiyar ?…..main baye hath se bhi paper likhu toh is-se adhik number mere aayenge….”

“Arman…just…shut up…”


Mujhe shut up karane ke baad Principal ne D section ke sabse hoshiyar ladke se meri is harqat ka reason puchha aur us hoshiyar ladke ne sab kuchh bak diya…usne Principal sir ko bata diya ki Varun ki bahan ko lekar ye ladayi hui thi….Principal ne D section ke ladko ko wapas bheja aur Varun ko cabin me bulaya aur sath hee D section ke ek ladko ko Vipin bhaiya ki class me bhejkar unko bhi khabar pahucha di…Varun se Principal ne pura matter jaan liya,jiske baad wo soch me pad gaye ki ab aage kya kiya jaye…..unhone mere ghar phone bhi laga diya par meri asli problem mere mammi-papa nahi the…meri asli problem mera bada bhai tha…jo abhi-abhi gusse me Principal ke cabin me ghusa tha …


“isne aisa kiya…? ”Principal se pura matter jan lene ke baad Vipin bhaiya uthe aur seedhe meri taraf badhe…

Vipin bhaiya ko apni taraf aata dekh mujhe andaza ho gaya tha ki ab mere sath kya hone wala hai…isiliye main apne gaal sahlane laga taaki dard kam ho….

“kyun be…kya samajh rakh hai tune school ko…”ek thappad markar unhone mujhse puchha…

“tujhe kitni baar samjhaya ki…Varun ke sath mat ghooma kar…mat baat kiya kar us-se…”dusara thappad marker unhone kaha “aaj main teri sari garmi utarta hoon…aaj pure school ke samne tujhe markar jo tera ye ghamand hai na….use aise todunga ki….”


Pahle toh Vipin bhaiya ne mujhe principal ke cabin me dhoya aur phhir maarte hue mujhe Principal ke cabin se bahar le aaye…is beech Principal sir ne Vipin bhaiya ko rokne ki koshish bhi ki lekin Vipin bhaiya nahi ruke aur mujhe marte hee rahe….ab teachers to class me the nahi…kyunki aadhe toh Gaurav ko lekar hospital gaye the aur aadhe Principal ke cabin me the… isliye bahut se students idhar-udhar ghoom rahe the…aur jab Vipin bhaiya mujhe marte hue Principal ke cabin se bahar le aaye toh sabki maano saans atak gayi…jo jaha tha wahi se sann rahkar is nazare ko dekh raha tha….teachers ne Vipin bhaiya ko rokna chaha lekin Vipin bhaiya ne saaf-saaf warning de di ki “uske family matter par koyi dakhalandazi nahi karega….”

Vipin bhaiya ne mujhe bahut dhoya mujhe beeso jhapad mar diye aur jab wo hath se marte-marte thak gaye toh unhone ek laat mujhpar kaskar jad di….jisse main wahi thodi door jakar gira…zameen par main thoda tedha hokar gira tha jiske karan mere ek side ki khopdi zameen par buri tarah ghista kar chhil gayi thi….lekin Vipin bhaiya ko pata nahi mujhse kya dushmani thi…wo yahi nahi ruke aur unhone mera baal pakad kar mujhe uthaya 


“aaj se tu sudhar jayega…bahut garmi hai na tujhme….”kahkar unhone apna hath mujhe marne ke liye uthaye hee the ki maine apni hatheli ko kaskar bandha aur ek mukka kaskar Vipin bhaiya ke naak par de mara…

“bada hai isliye abhi tak khada hai…lekin ab aur nahi…meri bhi koyi izzat hai aur tujhse kahi jyada hai..tujhe pata hai tere classmates ke aalawa School ke baki students tujhe kis name se pukarte hai…? Wo sab tujhe dekhkar kahte hai ki wo dekh Arman ka chutiya bhai ja raha hai ,jo Arman se har field me peeche hai…jo hamesha Arman se haar jata hai aur ab agar tune meri taraf ek kadam bhi badhaya toh…yahi zinda gaad dunga…..MAA KASAM”
.

Hum dono bhai the…lekin aaj jo school me ho raha tha, wo bahut bura tha…maine jab Vipin bhaiya ko dhamkaya toh unki thodi fati aur wo shant ho gaye…iske baad unhone na hee mujh par hath uthaya aur na hee mujhse kuch kaha kyunki wo ab iske kaabil bhi nahi the…actually hua ye tha ki maine jo mukka unke naak par mara tha, us-se unke naak se khoon nikalne laga tha…aur thodi hee der me wo bhi khoon se lathpath ho gaye…par isme galti kisiki thi ? meri ? Vipin bhaiya ki ? ya School ke teachers ki ? jo is samay mook darshak ban kar khade the….mana ki mere papa is school ke trustee hai lekin unhe Vipin bhaiya ko phhir bhi rokna chahiye tha…Vipin bhaiya ne apne jeb se roomal nikala aur apne naak se lagatar bah rahe khoon ko rokne ki koshish karne lage...main wahi khada tha…wahi kuch foot ki doori par…maine Vipin bhaiya ko dekha wo ab bhi roomal se apna khoon saaf kar rahe the tabhi meri nazar principal ke cabin ke bahar rakhi lohe ki bench par padi aur main bina samay gawaye waha gaya aur bench ko uthakar seedhe Vipin bhaiya ke paas pahucha….main us bench se kya karne wala hoon ye samajhne me teachers ko thoda time laga aur jab tak wo ye samajhte maine bench ko kayi baar Vipin bhaiya ke sar par de mara tha….confirm…maine 4 baar Vipin bhaiya ko us bench se mara tha aur ek baar school ke us teacher ko jisne mujhe sabse pahle rokne ki koshish ki thi… 


Waise Jab aapke papa school ke trustee rahte hai toh iska sirf fayda hee fayda hota hai…ab mujhe hee dekh lo …maine itna bada kaand kiya…Gaurav ko hospital pahucha diya…lekin mujhpar koyi action nahi liya gaya…kam se kam do-teen hafto ke liye toh school se bahar karna banta hee tha…par wo bhi nahi….upar se School prashasan ne Gaurav ko iska dosi thahraya aur use restricate to kiya hee sath hee quarterly exam dene se bhi use rok diya….yani ki mere papa ne apni influence ka full use kiya aur isme unka sath diya Varun ke papa ne…jo ki School ke char trustees me se ek the…kyunki afterall unhi ki laundiya ke chakkar me toh ye bawal hua tha…


.
“hero banne ka bahut shauk hai tujhe…” hospital me meri aur Vipin bhaiya ki marham patti karane ke baad jab papa bahar gaye to Vipin bhaiya ne mujhse kaha…

“wo toh main already hoon…”

“tu ruk..Arman…ab toh bas mujhe ek mauke ki taalash hai…phhir dekh main kaise teri dhajjiya udata hoon….”

“ek baat batao…koyi kaam dham nahi hai kya ,jo din bhar mere peeche pade rahte ho…kya maine kabhi aapke matter me ungali ki.aapko kya lagta hai mujhe aapke kands ki jaankari nahi hai…Vipin bhaiya, main sab kuch jaanta hoon…par main kabhi kuch bolta nahi…yadi main papa ke samne apka parcha kholne baith gaya na….toh unke idol bete hone ka jo dhong aap rach rahe ho na wo sab rafa- dafa ho jayega…pata nahi aakhir ghar me sab aapko acha kyun mante hai…jabki aap jitney percentage late ho us-se toh main hamesha 10-12 % aage hee rahta hoon…aap koyi sa bhi field chun lo aur mujhse jeet ke dikha do…study…sports…quiz…GK…kuch bhi chun lo”

“Arman…bahut ghamand hai na tere andar…par yaad rakhna ye ghamand tootega zaroor…zindagi mauka sabko deti hai…abhi tera time hai, kal mera hoga….tab main gin-gin ke hisab lunga…ghamand toh ravan ka nahi bacha toh phhir tera kya haal hoga….”

“toh ye bhi toh dekho ki Ravan ka ghamand toda kisne tha…Shri Ram ne…na ki aap jaise kisi sadak chhap ne…aur mera ghamand jab tootega ,tab tootega...uski parvah mat karo…aap toh ye socho ki ghamand tootne se pahle main kya-kya kar jaunga aur mujhe toh bas quarterly exam ka intezaar hai…jaha main har subject me 95+ score karunga aur aap 70…75 me chud jaoge…aak thoo…jakar padhayi karo aur maa-baap ka naam roshan karo…shukra manao ki mere karan hee Pandey ji ki beti se aap sab compete kar pate ho…warna aap sabko wo Pandey ji ki beti rel deti”


Vipin bhaiya apna daant peeskar rah gaye aur main in sabme itna kho gaya tha ki mujhe yaad hee nahi raha ki main is samay ka nahi hoon aur ye sab toh pahle se decided hai…mujhe achanak khayal aaya ki main toh ab bhi MBD aur River View Colony ke beech me kahi behosh pada hua hoon…maine time dekha…ab tak mujhe yaha aaye hue lagbhag paanch ghante beet chuke the, par kya haqiqat me bhi paanch ghante beet gaye honge ?…ya us-se kam ? ya phhir jyada ?


“agli baar se past aur present ke time ko compare karna padega….”bistar par lete hue maine socha“pata nahi main kis haal me hounga…waha se guzarne wale log toh mujhe bewada samajh rahe honge…pata nahi yaha se kab niklunga…kahi main mar toh nahi gaya BC ? ”

Yaha ke bare me ek chiz jo maine aur gaur ki thi wo ye ki mujhe na toh yaha neend aati hai aur na hee mujhe bhookh lagti hai, isiliye jab ghar me mujhe khane ke liye bulaya gaya toh maine saaf-saaf mana kar diya aur gharwalo ko laga ki main gussa hoon…jab ghadi me raat ke dus baje toh meri chinta aur badhne lagi….aur apne room me deewar ko dekhkar maine socha ki “chalo ek aur baar try marte hai…”

Maine apne sar ko sahlakar deewar par de mara…lekin nateeza ab bhi wahi tha aur main bhi wahi tha…

“ye kya hai BC …kya chutiyapa hai...mujhe wapas jaana hai…”deewar par chillate hue maine kaha aur wapas bistar par let gaya…ab neend toh mujhe aati nahi upar se main abhi us samay me atka hua tha…jis samay me mere paas na toh laptop tha aur na hee mobile…isliye beetne wala har ek seconds mere liye ghanto ke barabar tha…aur wo puri raat meri zindagi ki ab tak ki sabse badi raat rahi…jise maine bistar par letkar apne vartman ke bare me sochte hue bitaya…mera dimagh ab puri tarah ghoom raha tha…isliye subah 6 bajte hee main chupke se ghar se nikal kar ek pan thele par cigarette peene gaya….

“4-5 cigarette dena…”jeb se sau ki ek patti nikal kar maine kaha

“sar me kya hua…”Cigarette dene ki bajay us Pan thele wale ne mujhse mere sar ke bare me pucha

“tujhse kya matlab be…tu apna kaam kar…”bhadakte hue maine kaha…

“itna chilla kyun raha hai…izzat se baat kar…”

“dekh main na teri *** chod dunga…yadi tune cigarette dene ke aalawa ek aur shabd bhi kuch kaha toh…”

“ja BC , nahi dunga cigarette…”

“cigarette toh tera baap bhi dega…”bolte hue maine sau ki patti wapas apne jeb me dali aur apna hath andar daalkar cigarette ka ek packet nikal liya “tu mujhse puch raha tha na ki mere sar me ye chot kaise lagi…aise hee lagi thi…tere jaisa ek lawda tha…usi ko marte waqt mujhe chot lagi…ab mere peeche mat aana…warna ye chot tere sar me transfer kar dunga”
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Sadak ke kinare bane ek ghar ke peeche jakar maine fatafat ek cigarette sulgaya aur lambe-lambe kash marne laga …jisase mujhe thodi rahat nahi mili ….jiske baad maine do aur cigarette fook mare….aur tab mujhe apni galti ka ahsaas hua aur main wapas us panthele wale ke pas gaya…

“sorry…”cigarette ke dibba uski taraf fekte hue main bola “ 6 bachi hai…rakh le…aur agli baar se grahak jo maange chup chap de diya karna…”
.

Cigarette peene se meri bechaini thodi kam hui thi lekin phhir bhi main tension me tha ki main kab yaha se nikal paunga par main itna toh jaan gaya tha ki yadi main yahi ghar par pada raha toh yaha se nikalna mushqil hai…mujhe kuch na kuch karte rahna hoga taaki kisi ek event ke dauran mere dimag ke andar chalne wala samay chakra mujhe bahar nikal feke….isiliye main school jaane ke liye taiyar hone laga…gharwalo ne bahut mana kiya ki aaj mat ja, thode din rest kar le…lekin main nahi mana aur important test ka bahana karke school ke liye taiyar hone laga…lekin gharwale phhir bhi nahi maan rahe the aur Pita shri ne toh yaha tak kah diya tha ki wo mere teacher se baat kar lenge…lekin main nahi mana aur jabaran school jaane ke liye taiyaar hone laga….jiske karan papa thoda naraz ho gaye….lekin maine apna bag taanga aur ghar se nikal gaya….

Aaj Varun nahi aaya tha…isliye main bus me sar jhukaye chup chap baiha tha..normally bus se school ka safar aadhe ghante ka tha…lekin jab bahut der tak bus school nahi pahuchi toh maine ghadi me time dekha…


“ek ghanta ho gaya…aur bus abhi tak chal rahi hai…”apna sar uthakar maine khidki ke bahar dekha toh meri aankh fati ki fati rah gayi….bahar thik usi tarah bahut sari sadke ban rahi thi…jaise ki kal. Jis-se main samajh gaya ki yahi samay hai, yaha se nikalne ka…maine khud ko dekha toh paya ki main school uniform me nahi hoon aur mera sharir bhi present time wale Arman ka tha…maine bus me apni nazar daudayi , bus me koyi nahi tha….na toh students …na hee conductor aur na hee driver….par bus apni full speed ke sath sadak par daudi jaa rahi thi….

“kya-kya karwa raha hai mera dimag mujhse….ab is chalti hui bus se koodna padega…khair koyi baat nahi….kaun sa mujhe kuch hoga…”badbadate hue main gate tak aaya aur bhagwan ka naam lekar neeche kood gaya….mujhe past me aakhiri pal jo yaad hai usme bus ka tyre mere upar chadh gaya tha aur mujhe bahut sari aawaze sunayi de rahi thi lekin phhir sab kuch achanak se shant ho gaya…


Idhar haqiqat me main jab utha toh meri lakh koshisho ke bawzood meri aankh nahi khul rahi thi…jaise ki kisi ne feviquick se chipka diya ho…maine apni ungaliyo se bhi aankh kholne ki koshish ki lekin aankh aisi chipak rahi thi main kuch nahi kar pa raha tha…jis-se mujhe shaq hua ki kahi main sach me haqiqat me aaya hoon ya phhir se kahi aur pahuch gaya hoon….kahi lawda ,main mar toh nahi gaya ? 

“control…control…aur ahiste se khol…jaha power kaam nahi karta waha pyar kaam karta hai…kaam kar raha hai…aise hee …haan…iski toh…”

Aankh khulte hee main chauka , kyunki is waqt main apne room me tha…lekin ye kaise mumkin hai…kyunki mujhe ache se yaad hai ki main MBD restaurant se apne room pahucha hee nahi tha…maine time dekha toh dopahar ke ek baje the…aur yadi ye wahi din hai jis din main last time Nisha se mila tha toh yaha ka do ghanta mere past ke chaubis ghante ke barabar hai…..

“Relativity…Einstein kaka ”

Par yadi ye dusare din ka 1 PM hua toh ?…yadi yaha koyi relativity na hui toh ? ye bhi toh ho sakta hai ki mujhe kisi sadak ke kinare pada hua dekh Varun mujhe utha laya ho…aur is waqt kahi bahar gaya hua ho…waise bhi room ka gate khula hai…par isme ek locha hai…yadi main sadak ke kinare behosh pada rahta aur Varun mujhe dhoondh leta toh wo mujhe yaha room me thodi lata ,wo toh mujhe seedhe hospital me admit karta…par ye maloom karna ki aaj kaun si taarikh hai bahut aasan tha…maine apna mobile uthaya aur date check kiya….

“5 Sept. last time jab main Nisha se mila tha toh 5 Sept. tha ya phhir 4 sept. ya phhir 3…ek min. kal 4th Sept. tha…sure…lekin mujhe aisa kyun lag raha hai ki kal 4th nahi balki 3rd Sept. tha…bahut confusing hai ye…ek kaam karta hoon Nisha ko call karta hoon….”
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“haan ,Arman…toh confirm hain na ki tum hum sabko party de rahe ho….”

“party ,kaisi party…”angadayi lete hue maine pucha

“arey itni jaldi bhool gaye…tumhi ne toh kaha tha ki tum…mujhe, Shipra ko ,Sonam ko aur David ko apology party doge…”

“arey haan…yaad aaya…par pahle main tumhe specially party dunga ,akele me….uske baad sabko ek sath….”

“tum Mazak kar rahe ho na…”

“na..matlab haan…matlab na…pata nahi kya bol raha hoon main”

“main kuch samjhi nahi…”

“samjha toh main bhi nahi…par main Mazak nahi kar raha…aaj sham ko main aur tum matlab ki tum aur main kahi bahar chalte hai…mall ya hotel…kuch bhi choose kar lo…”

“sachi na…phhir apni baat se palat mat jaana…ok bye”

“arey rook toh…”

“jaldi bolo…main fb me apni photo dalne ke liye photo edit kar rahi hoon..”

“main tujhse aaj hee MBD me mila tha na…confirm…”

“ye bhi koyi puchhne wali baat hai…do ghante pahle hee toh mile the aur bill bhi tumne pay kiya tha…remember”

“kya remember…mujhe sab kuch yaad hai…wo toh main bas tujhe yaad dila raha tha ki aaj bill maine pay kiya hai”

“I love you..ab bye…”

“love you too….”bolte-bolte main ruka aur phhir kisi soch me pad gaya….jiske baad main man hee man me raksho ki tarah hasne laga…. “ab batata hoon in sabko ki Arman se panga lene ka kya nateeza hota hai…mujhe toh abhi se hee kafi excitement hai aur jab mera ye haal hai toh in sabki toh gand hee fat jayegi…inhe Version 2.0 ki jhalak dikhani padegi,taki next time se aukat me rahe…waise bhi kafi din ho gaye kuch dhamal kiye hue….mere fans ko lagta hai ki main badal gaya hoon ”
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Nisha se baat karne ke baad main bistar se utha aur neeche baithkar cigarette jalaya…

“toh school life ka ek din real life ke do ghante ke barabar hota hai…main khamkha tension le raha tha…is tarah toh main kayi din waha bita sakta hoon…Relativity is great…Shri Einstein is great…ye ab kaun call kar raha hai….kash ki ek din Esha ka call aa jaye aur wo bole ki…sorry Arman, wo sab toh Mazak tha…asaliyat me main Gautam se nahi balki tumse hee pyar karti hoon….kya tum mujhe abhi college ki canteen me mil sakte ho ? …..par main janta tha ki aisa kabhi nahi hoga…ye sab toh sirf meri dili ichhaye hai jo aksar mere dil me utar jati hai….Esha….Eshaaaaaaaaa……jitni baar iska naam liya hai yadi utni baar bhagwan ka naam liya hota toh bhagwan mujhe swarg lok ka raja bana dete….khair koyi baat nahi…”

Waha se uthkar main balcony me aaya aur wahi khada hokar aane jaane wale logo ko dekhne laga….aur bahut der tak main waha se aane jane wale logo ko dekhta raha…pata nahi, kyun..par main waha balcony me khada hokar waha se guzarne wale har ek shaks ko dhyan se dekh raha tha…jaise ki unhone kya pahan rakha hai…wo kaise chal rahe hai…wo akele hai ya kisi ki sath me….yahi sab karte hue maine bahut der wahi balcony par beeta diya tha aur jab mere pair jawab dene lage toh main andar aane ke liye muda lekin peeche mudte hee mujhe meri aankho ke samne Aradhna ka chehra dikhayi diya…aur main ekdum se jhatka khate hue apne aap peeche chala gaya…jisase mera pair balcony me fasa aur main ulta hokar balcony ke neeche gir gaya….

“Maaadhar……kya hai lawwdaaa yeeeee…”karahte hue main sirf itna hee bol paya aur phhir wahi seedha let gaya….

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Chapter-11 : lip of heart
Balcony se neeche girne ke kuch samay tak main wahi zameen par leta raha aur jab sharir me thodi jaan aayi yani ki jab balcony se girne ka dard kuch kam hua toh maine lete hue hee apna hath-pair hilaya….

“thoda dard hai lekin hath-pair kaam kar raha hai…”

Waha se uthkar sabse pahle maine apna shoulder ghumaya aur angadayi lene ki koshish ki…lekin tabhi meri kamar me itna tez dard hua ki angadayi mujhe beech me hee cancel karni padi…

“kamar lachak gaya kya …aur maro beta stunt…”

“lawda stunt…wo toh Aradhna ka chehra dikhayi diya toh…”

“fattu…”

“ab mare hue logo se kaun nahi darta…upar se jab tumne khud use mara ho…”langada-langada kar ek hath kamar me rakhkar andar jate hue main bola aur andar aate hee bistar par gir gaya….

“Nisha ko kya bolunga ab…”maine khud se sawal kiya

“bolna kya hai…sach bol dena..ki jisko tune college life me chod ke fek diya tha…wo tujhe dikhayi deti hai…use tu sach kyun nahi bata deta ki…tere sath aajkal kya ho raha hai….kaise teri gand mar rahi hai…”

“tujhe kya lagta hai…main use sab sach bataunga aur wo maan jayegi…”bistar par palti marte hue main bola “abey wo sochegi ki main use bewkoof bana raha hoon…”

“abey try toh maar…shuru se explain kar usko…tujhe nahi lagta ki Nisha ko ab sab sach batane ka waqt aa gaya hai…”

“chal be..jab jhooth bol sakta hoon toh sach kyun bolu…chal acha ,maan le…ki main use sach bata bhi deta hoon toh beta wo sach janne ke baad sirf ek hee chiz karegi….”

“kya…”

“breakup…”

“wo toh waise bhi hoga”

“jab hoga tab dekha jayega…aur tujhe kya lagta hai ki main use jakar bolunga ki…Nisha ,main dimag ke through time travel kar sakta hoon ya past me ja sakta hoon toh wo ye baat maan legi…abey chutiye, wo itna hasegi na ki haste-haste use heart attack aa jayega….chal ab nikal thodi der aaram marne de apun ko…aur ja jakar painkiller lekar aa dukan se….”


Balcony se neeche girne ke baad mann toh mera bilkul nahi tha kahi jaane ka…lekin kyunki Shri Arman ne vaada kiya tha isliye kuch ghante ke rest ke baad main jabran bistar se utha…facewash se face dhoya… cream, powder lagaya aur phhir kabad me se suit nikal kar pahan-ne laga…puri tarah taiyar hone ke baad main room se nikal hee raha tha ki mujhe yaad aaya ki…deo bhi maar leta hoon aur do-char painkiller bhi mashak leta hoon…aur maine aisa hee kiya…

“kaha hai, janeman….”call karke maine Nisha se puchha…

“bas 5 minute…wo pahle maine green colour ki nail polish laga li thi…lekin phhir mujhe yaad aaya ki meri dress toh blue colour ki hai ,isliye ab blue colour ki nail polish laga rahi hoon…sweet na…”

“maha sweet…”


itna sunkar Nisha khilkhila kar hasne lagi…aur maine turant call cut kar di kyunki wo abhi mujhe apne nail polish ke bare me bata rahi thi aur mujhe ye andaza ho chala tha ki yadi maine call cut nahi ki toh thodi der me wo apne lipstick…necklace aur kya kahte hai use jo aankho me lagate hai ?…eye color ….eye liner ? ya phhir eye shadow ? …whatever ….un sab ke bare me bhi batayegi…isliye maine phone rakhna hee munasib samjha….

“kya taiyar ho rahi hai yar…aadha ghanta ho gaya….aisich time pe jab main khali baitha rahta hoon tabhi mera dimag ghumta hai…khair, kar bhi kya sakte hai…”
Ye sochkar maine aadhe ghante ke baad bhi phone nahi kiya lekin jab ye aakda ek ghante ka hua toh mere sabra jawab de gaya aur maine phone laga hee diya…

“aaj hee chalna hai na ? ya kal chale….”

“bas 5 minute…main room se nikal hee rahi hoon…”

“chal phhir main car nikalta hoon…”apni kamar par hath rakhkar main khada hua aur car ki chabi ke sath goggle jeb me rakh kar neeche aaya….
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Main jab-jab Varun ki car ya bike use karta hoon toh har baar man hee man me use thanks kahta hoon…kyunki uski vazah se mujhe kahi aane jaane me ,kisi ke bhi sath aane-jaane me koyi dikkat nahi hoti….jo chahiye bas use bol do….uske according wo car ya bike chhod deta hai….Nisha ko aata dekh maine rear view mirror khud par focus kiya aur usme apna virtual…erect image dekhte hue baal set karne laga….

“kuch missing-missing hai par kya…watch….done, tie…done….phhir kya missing hai…yaad aaya, goggle…”badbadate hue maine goggle lagaya aur Nisha ke liye car ka gate khola….lekin phhir maine achanak car ka gate band kar liya aur laat maarkar car ka gate khola…jisase Nisha thodi chauk gayi…

“kaisi lag rahi hoon main…”car me baith-te hee Nisha puchhi

“maal”uske puchhte hee maine chir-parichit andaz me jawab diya “nice boobs…ek baar touch karke dekhu kya”

“aise bhi koyi tareef karta hai…”thoda mayoos hokar wo boli “dhyan se dekho maine kaun si dress pahni hai…”

“chal na…kyun paka rahi hai…”

“arey dress ka colour dekho…”

“navy blue…”

“kuch yaad aaya…”

“nahi…”

“arey ,yaad karne ki koshish toh karo…”

“blue…blue….hmm…blue film…tu sex karna chahti hai…car sex ”

“nahiiiiiii….yaad karo ki tumne mujhe ek baar apne mysterious dream ke bare me bataya tha…jisme tum aur main bahut khush the aur usme maine blue dress pahni thi…yaad aaya”

“kuch-kuch yaad aa raha hai…sapne se yaad aaya, kaha hai re mera revolver….abhi sapna sach karta hoon…”car start karte hue main bola aur car sadak par dauda di…


Nisha ki ek bahut kharab aadat hai ki uske sath raho toh all time us-se baat karte raho…aap kya kar rahe ho,isse use koyi fark nahi padta…chahe aapko heart attack hee kyun na aaya ho..wo baat karte hee rahegi…yahi mahol is waqt car me bhi thi…wo har do seconds me koyi naya topic utha leti aur chahti ki main car chalate waqt us-se baat karu…kabhi wo Shipra ke bare me baat karti ,toh kabhi Sonam ke bare me ,usne mujhse David ke bare me bhi baat ki aur phhir David ke sath apne bachpan ki puri kahani sunane baith gayi….jise sunkar maine socha ki…kya ,lawda humi ek chutiya the…jo ego ke chakkar me laundiyo se baat nahi karte the…khair wo samay Arman Version 1.0 ka tha aur Version 1.0 wala Arman tharki nahi tha…warna main kayiyo ki abhi tak le chuka hota….

“acha Arman , ye batao…meri heels kaisi hai…tumne gaur kiya kya…”

“mast hai…”bina Nisha ki taraf dekhkar maine jawab diya…

“bina dekhe bol rahe ho…”thoda mayoos hote hue Nisha boli

“bina dekhe…arey jab tu ,car me baith rahi thi na…tabhi maine tujhe pura scan kar liya tha…tere upar ke baal se lekar tere neeche ke baal tak ,sab kuch mujhe pata hai ki kaisa hai aur kitne centimeter ka hai”

“clean shaved"sharmate hue dusare taraf dekhkar Nisha ne kaha
Sharma kar Nisha boli lekin meri nazar samne sadak par hee rahi…kyunki ek bar college ke dino me main aise hee rolebazi me road par bike se parabolic curve banate hue pela gaya tha…jiski mujhe bahut bhari kimat chukani padi thi…main us din sadak par parabolic curve toh nahi bana paya upar se golden jubilee me anchoring karne ka hath laga mauka bhi maine gawa diya tha…are bhad me gayi anchoring…meri jaan bach gayi wahi bahut hai…aur tab main samjha ki free me sirf blood aur sperm donate karna chahiye..jaan nahi. Us din ke accident se maine jo chiz seekhi wo ye ki rolebazi kahi bhi chod lo lekin driving ke waqt bilkul nahi…isliye main Nisha ki baat sun toh raha lekin meri nazar samne sadak par fix thi….par ye baat alag hai ki ‘clean shaved’ sunkar mere pant me hulchal honi shuru ho gayi thi….


“acha Arman, ye batao…mera necklace kaisa hai aur ear ring….match to kar raha hai na…”ek khatarnak turning me Nisha ne mujhse ye sawal pucha, jise maine ek kaan se suna aur dusare kaan se nikal diya….matlab ki ,no response…

“bolo na…” aur abki baar bhi maine wahi kiya yani ki no response….


Mere is tarah back to back , do no response se Nisha thodi naraz ho gayi aur apna gaal phulakar apna chehra dusari taraf kar liya….maine Turning cross hone tak Nisha se kuch nahi kaha aur jaise hee turning cross hui…maine car sadak ke kinare roki…

“kya chahti hai , car thok du,tere is hazar rupaye ke necklace ke chakkar me ?…nahi tu chahti kya hai…jab se car me baithi hai…bas bole ja rahi hai-bole ja rahi hai…matlab ek percent bhi dimag hai ki nahi…upar se main thahra nausikhiya driver…abhi mar jayegi toh pata chalega, phhir narak me puchhte rahna ,rakshso se ki…meri sandel kaisi hai…meri lipstick kaisi hai…meri dress kaisi hai…”


“necklace hazar rupaye ka nahi…dedh lakh ka hai..”thodi der ke liye Nisha ne apna chehra meri taraf kiya…jawab diya aur wapas dusari taraf apna muh fer liya….
“itna mahanga…tab toh mauka dekhkar chori karna padega. Ya ek kaam karta hoon, tujhe yahi jaan se marker…tera necklace lekar rafoo-chakkar ho jata hoon…kisi ko thodi pata chalega ki tu mere sath thi…kya bolti hai, revolver nikalu…”

“David ko bataya hai ,maine…”abki baar bhi Nisha ne thodi der ke liye apna chehra meri taraf rotate karke jawab di aur phhir jawab dekar wapas opposite direction me rotate kar li…

“ek baar clockwise rotation, phhir rest, uske baad anticlockwise rotation…yani ki plus, zero , minus….magnitude same hai…toh net effect nikalta hai zero… displacement… zero…wow , Incredible ! Physics…aaj Shri Newton hote toh bahut khush hote…”bolte hue maine car dobara start ki….
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Nisha ko maine jab se turning cross karke batti di thi, wo shant thi…jisase mujhe khayal aaya ki yadi main isko car me ghusne se pahle hee batti de deta toh kitna acha rahta…lekin ab jab wo chup thi toh mujhe thoda bura lag raha tha…seriously …mera matlab Nisha bolte hue hee achi lagti hai…main bhi lawda ajeeb case hoon…ek pal ko yadi mujhe ek chiz achi lagti hai toh dusare pal wahi chiz buri lagne lagti hai…kabhi-kabhi toh main samajh nahi pata ki aakhir main chahta kya hoon…kyunki har badalte waqt ke sath meri ichchhaye bahut tezi se badalti hai…itni tezi se ki ek hee minute me mujhe bahut pasand aane wali chiz dusare pal napasand ho jati hai….lekin is duniya me ek chiz aisi hai jise main kabhi napasand nahi kar sakta…actually ek nahi…do aisi chiz hai…jo constantly mujhe achi lagti hai..par mujhe aisa kyun lag raha hai ki aisi do nahi balki teen chize hai…Esha…daru…and Physics….confirm…mujhe constantly pasand aane wali aisi teen hee chize hai aur daru se yaad aaya…I love daru more than girls….

“wow, tumhara necklace toh kafi mehanga lag raha hai…kitne ka hai…”jab Nisha aur thodi der tak kuch nahi boli toh maine hee baat ki shuruat karna thik samjha….waise aise aage se baat karna meri fitrat me nahi hai,par kabhi-kabhi main aisa kar leta hoon…kuch khas logo ke liye.lekin Nisha ne koyi jawab nahi diya

“kya lipstick lagati hai tu, Nisha….main toh fan ho gaya tere hontho ka…matlab kamal kar diya tune toh”

“ab tum kyun mujhse baat kar rahe ho…haan !…ab car ka accident nahi hoga.yadi kuch bolo toh uspar kayam bhi raha karo….mujhe nahi karni tumse koyi baat-vaat…”mujhpar chillate hue Nisha boli

“mat kar…main toh bas insaniyat ka farz nibha raha tha…socha ki tujhe bur lag gaya matlab bura laga hoga toh….main aisi hee baat karne laga tha ”

“mujhse, double meaning me kyun baat karte ho aur is tarah ke ashleel…behude words ka istemaal mat kiya karo…”

“ab main tujhse aise baat nahi karunga toh kya Sonam se aise baat karunga… kamal karti hai, Physics ke niyam ka palan nahi karti hai…”gussa hone ka natak karte hue main bola…kyunki mujhe maloom tha ki mujhe gusse me dekhkar Nisha shant ho jati hai aur ye war is baar bhi kaam kar gaya....jiske baad meri taraf dekh kar Nisha boli…

“toh tumhe kaisi lagi meri sandel…dhyan se dekho…isme blue colour ka strip bhi hai neeche…”

“mast hai..ekdum mast…superb…matlab ki itna acha hai ki mera jee kar raha hai ki ise kha jaun….”

“hihihi…thank you…aur mera hairband…”

“bas kar re bawa…maar hee dalegi kya aaj…”

“itna acha hai…? Detail me batao na”chahakte hue Nisha itni khush hui ki bata nahi sakta ki kitni khush hui….


waise bhi ye sab puch-puch kar usne meri halat aisi kar di thi ki ab main kuch bhi describe karne ki halat me nahi tha….lekin phhir bhi apni puri taqat laga kar main bola…

“you’re great…your choice is just amazing…your dress is mindblowing and your vagina ke toh kya kahhh……ne…..sorry wo aise hee apne aap flow-flow me muh se nikal gaya”slowly-slowly break marte hue maine kaha….


Nisha ne Eternity Mall choose kiya tha…jo ki River View Colony se 25 km door tha…upar se main thahra nausikhiya driver…isliye hume Eternity pahuchne me lagbhag ek ghanta lag gaya….Nisha bahut khush thi, isliye main bhi bahut khush tha….waise meri ye fitrat toh nahi hai ki mujhpar samne wale ki khushi ya gham ka koyi asar pade…lekin jaisa ki maine pahle kaha tha ki kabhi-kabhi aisa ho jata hai…

“tumne ye mall kyun choose kiya…”lift se bahar nikal kar maine Nisha se pucha….
Jiske jawab me apna baal hath se peeche karte hue wo mujhe dekhni lagi aur kuch der tak meri aankho me dekhti hee rahi…


“ye kaha kho gayi…kahi ye bhi time travel toh nahi karne lagi…”sochte hue maine Nisha ko thoda hilaya , lekin wo meri aankho me hee dekhti rahi…

“kya tumhe itna bhi yaad nahi ki hum pahli baar yaha mile the…isi mall me…”

“yaad…sab yaad hai mujhe…tu kisi ka batua marke ground floor me bhag rahi thi aur main third floor par tha…jiske baad maine tujhpar tajectory set karke khud ko launch kar diya tha…mujhe aaj bhi yaad hai wo din…ki kaise tu mere samne ro rahi thi…”(kamal hai hum dono yaha mile the…mujhe toh laga tha ki park me mile honge)

“aisa kuch bhi nahi hua tha,samjhe….”kaskar ek mukka seedhe mere chhati me marte hue Nisha ne kaha…

“pyar me itna tez thodi marte hai….”apna chhati sahlate hue main bola 

“dekha mera power…”

“power…? yani work upon time…anyway …leave it ….”samne se aati ek maal ko dekhte hue main bola “mere samne jyada power-vower mat kar ,warna Abhi fook dunga na toh neeche feka jayegi…”
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Nisha khud ek maal thi aur uske rahte maine mere samne se aati hui ek ladki ko dekha aur bas dekhta hee rah gaya…us ladki ko samne se dekhkar meri dilI ichchha hui ki main uski gand bhi dekhu …uski gand ka shape aur size dekhne ke liye…jab wo mere paas se gujari toh main peeche muda aur dekhte hee main us ladki ko chodne ke bare me sochne laga aur man hee man me khud se bola…“wah…kya gand hai…ye jhatu toh ise bahut chodta hoga…chhote log, sale….gand ke pujari ”

“Arman…ab saamne dekh lo …wo chalI gayi”jab main bahut der tak peeche hee dekhta raha toh kohni marker Nisha ne mera dhyan us ladki ki gand se hataya….

“dekha…yahi hota hai…jab hum dono sex nahi karte toh…mera dhyan unnecessarily …. unnecessary ladkiyo par chala jata hai…”Dominos me ghuste hue maine kaha…


Dominos ke andar jakar hum dono ek jagah par baith gaye , maine do pizza order kiya ,jiske baad Nisha boli….

“tumhe meri aankhe kaisi lag rahi hai…”

“kya hua, teri aankho ko….”uski aankho me dekhte hue main bola“teri aankh toh thodi blue dikh rahi hai…”

“guess karo, ye kaise hua hoga”

“hmm…scattering of light…jiski vazah se aasman neela dikhta hai ”

“nahiiii…jab dekho, tab physics…common sense use karo na”

“lense…lagayi hogi”

“haan…”muskurate hue Nisha ne jawab diya “acha lag raha hai na”

“haan….”

“acha batao…hum dono pahli baar kaha mile the….”apni muskan jaari rakhte hue usne mujhse pucha…

“kyun batau ? ja nahi batata”

“are batao na…”

“pahle 100 de phhir bataunga”

“chalo de diya ,maan lo”

“toh maine bata diya, tu bhi maan le”

“ab samjhi…tumhe yaad hee nahi hai ki, hum pahli baar kaha mile the…hai na..”thoda serious hote hue Nisha boli

“yaad…mujhe sab yaad rahta hai…rook thodi der”bolkar maine flashback me gaya…


lekin ajeeb baat hai ki Nisha se first time milne ki jo tasveer mujhe mil rahi thi….wo Eternity mall ki nahi balki River View colony ke park ki thi….toh kya matlab hai iska ki Nisha mujhse jhooth bol rahi hai ya phhir mera dimag…? pahle toh aisa kabhi nahi hua…flashback mar-mar ke toh maine 8th semester ki puri story Varun ko perfectly sunayi thi…phhir kaha galti ho rahi hai..kya flashback me jaane ki meri power khatm ho gayi hai ? ya phhir Nisha jhooth bol rahi hai….? lekin Nisha jhooth kyun bolegi….ya ye bhi ho sakta hai ki hum dono first time park me hee mile ho aur Nisha jhooth bolkar mera test le rahi ho…..ye toh sala reasoning ka question ho gaya…chalo maan lo ki hum dono yaha Eternity mall me first time mile honge, par main mall kyun aaya hounga…kapde kharidne….No Never…8th Semester ke baad toh ye sab karne ka mera mann ho hee nahi sakta toh phhir kya pizza khane…kahi yaha Dominos me toh humari pahli mulaqat nahi hui thi ? lekin yadi mujhe pizza khana hota toh main yaha 25 kilometer door nahi aata…jabki mera kaam ek call se bhi ho sakta tha….toh kya phhir grocery ke liye main mall aaya tha….

“bitch please…you are Shri Arman…grocery no… never”

“phhir kisliye aaya raha hounga…jis-se meri mulaqat is-se hui hogi….”Nisha ko dekh kar main sochane laga….aur wo mano bas mera sar kalam ke liye ekdum taiyar thi…use bas intezar tha ki kab main galat jawab du aur wo mera sar uda de


“yaad aaya…PVR me…main movie dekhne aaya tha..hai na ? ”

“right..”thoda nirash hote hue Nisha ne kaha aur uske nirash hone ki vazah shayad ye thi ki use maine wo mauka nahi diya jiski taalash me wo thi….usne mujhe khari-khoti sunane ka pura intezam kar liya tha ,shayad ek-do dialogue bhi usne soch rakha tha lekin mere sahi jawab ne uske khade armano par dhokha kar diya tha…That’s Shri Arman for you….Bitches


Isi dauran humara order bhi aa gaya par jab se maine apna dimag revine mara tha tab se mera sar me dard shuru ho gaya tha…aur pizza ka ek slice maine jaise hee uthaya , mere fefdo me aisi tez jalan hui jaise kisi ne garam angare chhua diye ho….

“kya hua, Arman….rook kyun gaye, khao na”

“pata nahi…kya hua…par mujhe ab bilkul acha nahi lag raha”ek hath se apna sar aur ek hath se apni chhati sahlate hue main bola “mera sar ghoom raha hai…aise lag raha hai jaise ki abhi bas fatne hee wala hai…lagta hai brain hamorrhage ho jayega”

“lo pani piyo”apni jagah se uthkar meri taraf ,mere bagal me aakar Nisha boli…

“pani se kuch nahi hoga…”apna sar peeche chair me tikane ke liye maine apna sar peeche kiya….lekin chair me main apna sar tika saku wo chair itni badi nahi thi….

“kaisi jhat type chair rakhi hui hai, in logo ne…chal chalte hai,yaha se…”

“chalo…”bolkar Nisha uthi aur mobile nikalkar kisi ko call karne lagi…

“kise call kar rahi hai”

“ambulance ko….”

“pagal hai kya…”uske hath se phone chhenkar main bola “wo log mujhe hospital le jayenge seedhe…”

“toh isme problem kya hai”

“prooo….blll…eeemm”bolte hue main rook gaya, kyunki ab mera seena andar se itni teji ke sath jal raha tha ki mujhse bola bhi na gaya…lekin Nisha ko batana zaroori tha ki main hospital kyun nahi ja sakta….isliye seene ki tez jalan ko bardasht karte hue maine jabarjasti apna muh khola…lekin kuch bol nahi paya

“Arman , tumhari…halat mujhe thik nahi lag rahi…mujhe ambulance ko call karne do”pareshan hote hue Nisha boli…waha aas-paas logo ki bheed bhi lagi hui thi…lekin sab sirf mujhe dekh rahe the…waise mujhe kisi se koyi ummid bhi nahi thi aur na hee mujhe kisi se koyi shikayat thi… because I hate everyone…..

“Armaan…”

“Armaan nahi Arman…A-r-m-a-n…”

“just shut up…”gusse se cheekhte hue Nisha ne kaha aur mere hath se mobile chheen kar number dial karne lagi…

“samjha kar…mujhe koyi chhoti-moti type ki bimari nahi hai…jo hospital me jakar thik ho jaunga…mujhe jo bimari hai…usme bahut time aur bahut paisa lagega aur hospital wale mere ghar par khabar kar denge…jiske baad , wo mujhe hamesha kahenge ki, main aaj unki vazah se zinda hoon….”apni chhati par mukke marte hue main bola “chal, parking me chal…mujhe pata hai ki ye kaise thik hoga”
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Meri baat sunkar bhi Nisha nahi mani aur usne ambulance ko call kar hee diya…yani ki use mere ego ki koyi parwah hee nahi…isiliye main us-se nafrat karta hoon…jaan ka kya hai..agle janam me mujhe dusari mil jayegi…lekin ego…wo main ek baar tootne ke baad kaha se launga…

“main khane ke bina kuch hafte jee sakta hoon….paani ke bina kuch din aur oxygen ke bina shayad kuch minutes….lekin ego ke bina…ego ke bina main ek second bhi nahi jee sakta…”
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Isiliye Nisha ne jaise hee ambulance ko call kiya , main parking ki taraf ladkhadate hue teji se bhagne laga…mera irada ab ambulance ke aane se pahle waha se rafoo chakkar hona tha….taki main hospital na ja paun…

“acha hua…car lekar aaya tha…yadi bike lekar aaya hota toh parabolic ki jagah aaj bike chalate hue hyperbolic curve banta..chal ,ab nikal le”badbadate hue maine car ka gate khola 

Itne me waha Nisha bhi aa gayi…meri aankhe is waqt bahut jal rahi thi aur mujhe sabkuch dhundhla dikhayi pad raha tha…lekin us dundhale drishya me bhi main Nisha ka gussa dekh sakta tha…aur sath hee uska mayoos chehra bhi….car ki chabhi uske taraf fek-kar maine us-se puchha

“car chala legi,kya…”

“ambulance aa rahi hai aur tum usi me seedhe hospital jaoge”

“yaani ki na…koyi baat nahi, main khud chala lunga”dono hath se apne sar ka baal kheechkar main bola…jiske baad Nisha ne turant car ki chabhi uthayi aur mujhe car ke andar baithakar driving seat par baith gayi….

“bas tum aaj zinda bach jao….phhir main kabhi tumhare sath kahi nahi jaungi”

“aise bhi koyi…bre…bre…brreeeee…..breakup karta hai kya…Nisha mera muh jam ho ra…raha hai….by the way, nice dress…kitne me liya..ekdum kamal hai aur sandel bhi mast hai…usme jo blue colour ki strip hai na , us…uska kya kahna…aur hairband…wow..just amazing…tumhari aankh…tumhari aankhe aaj neeli hai, shayad scattering ki vazah se…nahi scattering nahi….scattering nahi…lense ki vazah se…”


Mera itna kahna tha ki Nisha car chalate hue hee rone lagi…jise dekhkar main soch me pad gaya…ki main toh bas uski tareef kar raha tha…taaki wo normal ho jaye…maine kuch galat kaha kya ? anyway…

“rok…rok…”achanak jor se chillate hue maine Nisha ko car rokne ke liye kaha….

“kyun kya hua…”

“mujhe mera ilaaz mil gaya…jaldi se rok…haan, rok diya….ab thoda reverse maar….ab thoda baye le….bas..bas…tu yahi rah main abhi aaya”

Car se neeche utarkar maine apne wallet se hazar ka note nikala aur apne samne bani daru ki dukan se ek quarter liya…..

“kyun be…mere area me toh dhayi sau ka ek pavva aata hai…tune toh teen sau kat liye…ajab andhi chod rahe ho, lawda…khair koyi baat nahi”
Quarter lekar main car me aaya…aur Nisha se car full speed me bhagane ke liye kaha…

“dekh be…paani ke bina kadwa toh lagega lekin ek yahi chiz hai ,jo tujhe normal bhi karegi….naak band karke ek saans me jitna pee sakta hai pee le”


lekin main daru ki botal ka dhakkan kholta uske pahle hee car sadak par daudte hue achanak se apne aap bahut jor se hilne lagi…Car me rakhi har ek chiz…sab apni jagah par vibrate karne lagi….maine Nisha ki taraf dekha lekin ab wo driving seat par nahi thi…wo driving seat se mano achanak gayab ho gayi thi,lekin car ab bhi sadak par daud rahi thi…aur tabhi meri nazar car ke baahar samne ki taraf gayi….aur saamne ka nazara dekh kar mere dimag ne kaam karna band diya tha….itna vishal aur bhayankar drishya maine apne zindagi me aaj tak nahi dekha tha…matlab ki koyi is drishya ko kaise describe kare….

“iski maa ka …..ye kya hai be….tsunami…” turant koodkar driving seat par aate hue main bola aur apni seat belt kaskar bandh li 


Maine dekha ki mere samne paani ki vishal dharaye tezi se meri taraf hee badh rahi hai , wo samundar ka ufaan itna bada tha ki Nagpur ki badi-badi building bhi bhi uske same chhoti lag rahi thi aur apne samne aane wali har chiz ko wo ukhad kar apne sath baha rahi thi….chahe phhir wo buildings ho ya phhir sadak ke kinare lage ped ya phhir khud sadak….maine turant car reverse mari aur full acelerator markar car bhagane laga….mere aas paas aur bhi log the jo ki us tsunami se bachne ke liye bhag rahe the…wo sab cheekh rahe the, chilla rahe the…lekin Samundar ki un vishal aur bhayankar dharao ke aage un sabki aawaz mano dab gayi thi….mere dekhte hee dekhte kitne log , kitni gadiya us sunami me sama gayi thi lekin main bacha raha …aur bhagta raha….lekin ek agle chaurahe par car modte waqt na jaane ek truck kaha se saamne aa gaya aur meri car ko usne samne se thok diya jis-se meri car palti marne lagi….
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“acha batao…hum dono pahli baar kaha mile the….”car ke sath jab main bhi palti kha raha tha toh mujhe ye aawaz sunayi di…lekin ye aawaz toh Nisha ki thi

“kyun batau ? ja nahi batata”mere muh se ye shabd apne aap nikla ,pata nahi kaise par mere muh se ye shabd apne aap hee nikal gaye…jaise ki bhagwan ne script likh rakhi ho ki Arman marte waqt ye shabd bolega….lekin ye silsila yahi nahi ruka mujhe aur bhi shabd sunayi diya aur maine kayi baar automatically reply bhi diya

“are batao na…”

“pahle 100 de phhir bataunga”

“chalo de diya ,maan lo”

“toh maine bata diya, tu bhi maan le”

“ab samjhi…tumhe yaad hee nahi hai ki, hum pahli baar kaha mile the…hai na..”

“yaad…mujhe sab yaad rahta hai…rook thodi der”


Itna bolte hee maine gaur kiya ki main khoon se lathpath hoon aur pani ki vishal dharaye bas mujhtak pahuchne hee waiI hai…is waqt mera sar dard nahi ho raha tha aur na hee meri chhati jal rahi thi… maine car ke andar har us pal ko mahsoos kiya jab main mar raha tha…maine mahsoos kiya ki kaise meri car sunami me samayi…kaise pani tezi se meri car ke andar ghusa aur kaise mera dam ghut raha tha aur kaise maine us car ke andar hee apna dam tod diya…..
.


“acha batao…hum dono pahli baar kaha mile the….”apni muskan jaari rakhte hue usne mujhse pucha…

“kyun batau ? ja nahi batata…..rook …main yaha kaise main toh just abhi-abhi mar gaya tha…”bolkar maine apne aas paas dekha toh paya ki main toh Eternity mall me hee hoon aur mere left side…Nisha khadi hai…actually left side nahi….right side me…maine gaur kiya mere pure kapde sukhe hai aur paani ka koyi nam-o-nishan tak nahi tha…

“Arman batao na hum pahli baar kaha mile the…”

“kya ye real hai ya ye bhi mera hallucination hai”

“acha ab main samjhi ,tumhe yaad hee nahi ki hum pahli baar kaha mile the”

“PVR me mile the…kitni baar batau…aur yadi tu mujhse zara sa bhi…electron ke size ke barabar bhi pyar karti hai toh please do minute ke liye chup ho ja…”

“okay….”mera hath pakad kar bachcho ki tarah hilate hue Nisha boli….
.

Maine apna sar jor se hilaya aur sochne laga ki actually ho kya raha hai….

“main Nisha ke sath Dominos me tha…jaha humne pizza order kiya ,lekin main pizza khata uske pahle hee mere sar me tez dard shuru ho gaya aur Nisha mujhe waha se bahar le aayi…jiske baad maine daru li lekin usi samay Nisha car se achanak chhoo mantar ho gayi aur car vibrate hone lagi….ye vibration aksar usi samay hota hai…jab main apne banaye virtual world se haqiqat me laut raha hota hoon…yani ki mujhe us samay jab car vibrate ho rahi thi…tab haqiqat me laut aana chahiye tha…lekin aisa hua nahi aur main wahi raha…jiske baad ek truck ne meri car ko thoka aur phhir us car me marne ke baad main wapas yaha aaya…toh kya ye haqiqat hai ? lag toh yahi raha hai…par sochane wali baat ye hai ki jab car vibrate kar rahi thi toh main wapas kyun nahi aa paya….khamkha mujhe marne ka experience lena pada…sala us sunami me dum ghutne ko main abhi bhi mahsoos kar sakta hoon..anyway, ant bhala toh sab bhala”
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“Arman chalo, Dominos me chalte hai..”mera hath pakad kar hilate hue Nisha mujhse boli

“Dominos…pagal hai kya, sunami aa jayegi…Dominos me”

“sunami….? toh phhir kaha chale”

“ bar chal, aaj tujhe daru pilata hoon”
.

main aur Nisha Eternity ke andar bane beer bar ya disco bar…jo bhi kah lo…uske andar gaye aur ek kone ki table pakad kar baith gaye…main chah raha tha ki Nisha mere kinare me mujhse bilkul satkar baithe…wo mere paas baithi toh thi par satkar nahi…

“itna door hee baithna hota toh main beer bar ke mid point me tere sath baithta na…jaha roshni hai…yaha andhere me nahi”kahte hue main intezaar karne laga ki Nisha ab mere karib aayegi…lekin jab wo mere karib nahi aayi toh main hee uski taraf khisak gaya aur uske kandhe par hath rakh kar bola…

“acha Nisha ,ye bata…kya legi pahle aur kaha legi”

“maza ya sprite…”

“white maza ?”

“Arrmaaaan….”

“dil pe mat le…mazak kar raha tha…chal acha , tu aaj mujhse kuch bhi puch le…main uska sahi jawab dunga…phhir main tujhse kuch puchunga jiska tujhe bhi sahi jawab dena padega”

“sach”

“haan”apna hath Nisha ke kandhe se neeche le jaate hue main bola

“mujhe sochne do…hmmm…acha ye batao ,tumhari favorite actress kaun si hai…”

“koyi si bhi nahi….”

“tumne bola tha ki, tum mujhe sach bataoge….”

“toh sach hee toh bata raha hoon…meri favorite actress time to time change hoti rahti hai…zaroorat ke hisab se ”

“ok…ab ye batao ki tum mere sath Mardani aur Mary Kom movie dekhne kyun nahi aaye the…”

“main wo movie bilkul nahi dekhta, jisme koyi lady lead role me ho… isliye tere sath nahi aaya tha…kyunki mujhe feeling nahi aati”

“toh kya iska matlab ye hai ki tum sexist ho….jo ladke-ladki me bhedbhav karte ho ”

“maybe…I dont know…”Nisha ke boobs par apna hath le jakar rakhte hue main bola 

“aur puch na kuch, maza aa raha hai”

“tumhara favorite actor kaun hai…”

“isme main thoda confuse hoon..matlab do favorite hai…”

“ek toh Robert Downey Jr. hai aur dusara…? ”

“wahi apne Jackie dada…Black pearl wale…”

“acha wo…Jack Sparrow”

“Captain Jack Sparrow… ”bolkar main Nisha ke ek boobs ko sahlane laga aur jab usne koyi virodh nahi kiya toh maine thoda aur force apply kiya aur uske boobs ko dabana shuru kar diya…

“acha ye batao Arman….”

“ho gaya na…kitna puchegi…ab meri bari…”Nisha ke boobs ko pura bheenchkar main bola

“nahi..ek …eee..kkk…ek aur…tumhari favorite story kaun hai aur favorite writer…let me guess Chetan Bhagat”

“Munshi Premchand….the Vampire , Shakespeare aur favorite story hai Godan…Bunglow no.13 ,Dead never lie…ab tera time khatm hua aur mujhe afsos hai ki tune itna acha mauka gawa diya…matlab tu mujhse kuch bhi puch sakti thi…kuch bhi matlab kuch bhi…lekin tune ise aise hee gawa diya…aur ab main puchhunga”
maine apna hath hatakar wapas Nisha ke kandhe par rakha aur dheere dheere uski dress ke andar neeche sarkane laga aur jaise hee mera hath Nisha ke dress ke andar uski bra se touch hua maine us-se pucha…

“tune bra kaun si colour ki pahni hai”

“light blue”

“aur neeche wala”

“panty ?”

“hmm”

“same color”


Nisha ki bra ke andar hath dalte hee mera rom-rom machal utha tha , maine dusara hath Nisha ki jangh par rakha aur ahiste-ahiste uski choot tak pahuch gaya….ab Nisha bhi full mood me aa gayi thi aur use kiss karne ke liye maine jaise hee apne honth uske honth ke karib laye toh us andhere me mujhe Nisha ke baju me ek aur ladki baithi hui dikhai di…jo ki mujhe hee ghoor rahi thi…uski aankhe surkh laal thi aur baal bikhre hue hawa me lahra rahe the…….

“Aradhna…? ”darkar maine Nisha ko ek jhatke me khud se alag kiya 

“kaun Aradhna”

“Aradhna matlab…prathna…mera mann kar raha hai ki main tumhari Aradhna karu…room me le jakar”apni jagah par khada hote hue main bola “chal…yaha se…”

“lekin kyun”

“ashleel ladki…chal, chalkar kuch khate peete hai…bahut bhookh lagi hai mujhe”

“Dominos”

“tujhe bataya toh tha ki, waha jaunga toh sunami aa jayegi…tujhe kya…tu toh car se achanak gayab ho jayegi…marna toh mujhe padega….chal chalkar samosa khate hai”

“sunami…car ,ye kya bol rahe ho tum…mujhe toh kuch bhi samajh nahi aa raha hai”

“ye sab psychological baate hai…teri samajh me nahi aayegi”
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Nisha ke sath ghanto Eternity me ghumne ke baad humne ek movie dekhi aur phhir River View Colony ke liye ravana ho gaye…

“Desai ji kuch nahi bolenge kya ki tu kaha thi…”hum River View se kuch hee doori par the toh maine Nisha se puchha

“nahi…aur yadi wo puchhenge toh main bol dungi ki main na..shopping karne gayi thi…Shipra aur Sonam ke sath….par mujhe maloom hai ki wo nahi puchhenge ”

“badhiya hai…ye bata ki kya sach me tera necklace dedh lakh ka hai…ya fake rahi hai”

“isme koyi shaq hai kya…mere paas toh dhayi laakh ka bhi hai…wo main tumhe kal dikhaungi”

“tu toh mere ummid se jyada rahis hai….do-char laakh mujhe udhar de de…”

“mere account me abhi seventy thousands hai bas…chahiye toh bolo”

“rahne de…kitni achi hai tu Nisha…kash ki tere jaise wo bhi hoti…”

“wo ? kaun wo ?”
“koyi nahi…”

“batao na kaun”muhe pakad kar hilate hue Nisha puchhi…

Nisha ke is sawal par main kuch der chup raha aur phhir ek jordar lambi saans li lekin main apni wo lambi saans complete kar pata uske pahle hee Nisha ek aur baar mujhe hila kar puchhi.... "wo kaun ? "

“arey Sonam…! aur kaun.... kash ki tere jaise hee Sonam bhi hoti toh Varun kitna lucky rahta”kahte hue maine car apne flat ke saamne rok di aur Nisha ki taraf dekha…wo kafi khush lag rahi thi…mere muh se apni tareef sunkar….

“acha,Arman… ok…bye…Good Night”car se utar kar usne mujhse kaha….

“good night…tumhara Necklace acha hai”

“main janti hoon…thank you”apne ghar ki taraf jate hue palat kar mujhse boli…

“tumhari sandel bhi mast hai…khaskar ke usme lagi blue strip”

“thanks…ab jao bhi”ek baar phhir palatkar Nisha ne mujhe thanks kaha

“aur tumhara ,hairband kamal ka hai…kal mujhe de dena…main bhi lagaunga….”bolkar main intezaar karne laga ki Nisha ek baar phhir thanks bolegi….lekin abki baar uski taraf se koyi responce nahi aaya….shayad usne meri aawaz hee na suni ho ya phhir sunkar ansuna kar diya ho…God Knows.

Nisha aaj bahut khush thi….lekin gaur karne walI baat jo thi ki kya main khush tha ? kya mujhe Nisha wakayi me utni achi lagti hai jitna ki main uske achi hone ka dikhawa karta hoon….? kya Nisha mere layak hai…? Yadi gaur kiya jaye aaj ke incidents par toh in teeno ka jawab jo milta hai wo hai….Naa.

Car rakhne ke baad maine daru aur bisleri ki botal ek-ek jeb me bhari aur room lock karke park ki taraf chal diya….raat ke dus baj chuke the aur park band ho chuka tha…isliye park me mere daru peene ka ye best time tha….maine botal deewar par rakhi aur deewar chadhne ke liye apna hath deewar par rakha hee tha ki kisi ne mujhe peeche se aawaz di….


.
“hey mister…kaun ho tum…aur itni raat ko park ke paas kya kar rahe ho”

“chal na be…nikal yaha se…”bina pichhe mude deewar par chadhne ki koshish karte hue main bola….lekin isi beech uski aawaz phhir se mere kaano me gunji…

“main tumhe last warning de rahi hoon…seedhe se neeche utarte ho ya police ko call karu”

“warning de rahi hoon….rahi hoon…? yani ki ek ladki…par iski aawaz sunkar mujhe aisa kyun laga ki aawaz kisi ladke ki hai…kya ab mere liye male aur female ki aawaz ko pahchan pana bhi mushqil ho gaya hai…? ek minute , brain ko refresh karta hoon ….” maine apna sar jor se hilaya jisase mujhe uski aawaz kisi ladki ki aawaz ki tarah lagne lagi

“tum peeche mudo…kahi chori karne toh nahi aaye yaha”

“haan…ab thik hai ..ab iski aawaz lag rahi hai ki kisi ladki ki hai”peeche mudkar main bola“par ye ladki nahi hai….ye toh ek budhiya hai…”

“hey…buddhi kisko bola…”

“chalo na aunty…kyun dimag kha reli ho….”

“abhi main police ko phone karti hoon”

“us se kya hoga”

“wo tumhe pakad ke le jayenge”

“aur yadi uske pahle ,main apko jaan se markar bhag gaya toh…soch kar dekho…sochne wali baat hai” 

“Kya matlab hai tumhara”sakpaka kar peeche hat-te hue us aunty ne mujhse pucha

“janeman ,main toh kitne din se tumhare intezaar me tha…aur aaj tum aa gayi… main abhich chaku se tumhara pet fadunga aur tumhari kaleji ko chakna ke taur par istemal karke daru piyunga ”kahte hue maine apni jacket me hath dala hee tha ki wo aurat udhar se khishak li aur uske udhar se khisakte hee main bhi udhar se khisak liya….


Agle din subah maine Varun ke through Shipra…Nisha…Sonam….David aur 5-6 logo ko raat me party ka invitation diya…jiske taiyari ki sari jimmedari Varun ki thi….siway ek kaam ke. Aur wo ek kaam tha beer aur daru kharid kar lana….jise main karne wala tha….par mujhe tension is baat ki nahi thi ki..itna sara intezam Varun akele kaise kaise karega….balki mujhe tension is baat ki thi ki aaj office me Vandana Rathi mera kya haal karegi….kal toh maine leave le liya tha….lekin aaj mujhe har haal me office pahuchna tha….aur Vandana mam ka samna karna tha….main abhi isi soch me dooba hua tha ki mujhe pata hee nahi laga ki kab auto me mere bagal me ek ladki aakar baith gayi aur shayad mujhe pure raste bhar ye pata na chalta yadi wo jor-jor se phone me baat na karti toh….aur jab main hosh me aaya toh maine tirachhi nazar se use dekha….

“item….kya khushboo mar reli hai baap , mann toh karta hai ki auto me hee taang utha kar chod du…”tirachhi nazar se use dekhte hue maine socha….

“bhaiya ,auto thoda dheere karna toh….aawaz thik se sunayi nahi de rahi hai”auto wale ke kandhe par hath rakh kar wo boli aur auto wale ki mazal ki wo uski baat na mane , auto wale ne turant auto ki speed kam kar di….

Shuru me toh mera dil kiya ki auto wale ko bolu ki auto ki speed kam na kare…mujhe office ke liye der ho raha hai…lekin phhir maine socha ki jitna hee dheere wo auto chalayega ,utni hee der tak main aur wo maal ek dusare ke sath ,ek hee seat me rahenge….aur waise bhi Rathi mujhe pelne wali hai hee toh phhir jaldi jaane ka kya fayda….yahi sochkar main chup raha….

“haan ,hello…main Khushboo bol rahi hoon…ye mera new number hai….Dileep ko ye number de dena aur bolna ki mujhe call kare….”thoda tez aawaz me wo boli…

“Dileep…huh ,ghatiya name”
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Sharda Vihar pahuchne ke baad maine sabse pahle jo ek kaam kiya ki main sabse pahle bathroom gaya aur phhir wapas aakar do glass paani piya….

“kya ladki thi…kuch der ke liye toh mere rom-rom me rum sama gaya tha….use abhi tak mahsoos kar sakta hoon main… ”

“Arman ,bhau…Vandana madam boli hai ki jaise hee aap aaoge toh aapko unke cabin me bheju”mere paas aakar Jagat ne mujhe Rathi mam ka farman sunaya

“gusse me hai kya….”

“wo toh hardum gusse me rahti hai…mujhe toh lagta hai ki Vandana mam , Hulk hai…jo har dum gusse me rahti hai”

Vandana Rathi ne mujhe cabin me bulaya hai…ye sunkar maine ek glass paani aur piya aur seedhe uske cabin me pravesh kiya….

“aapne mujhe bulaya mam…”masoomiyat ke sath Vandana Rathi ki taraf dekh kar main bola….

“mujhe tumse kuch nahi bolna…tum jaiso ko main bahut ache tarike se janti hoon…tumhare samne table me do letter pade hai…jisme se ek blank hai ”

Maine samne dekha aur jaisa ki Vandana Rathi Ne kaha tha ,mere samne table par do letter fold kiye hue rakhe the….

“un do me se ek balank hai aur ek jo blank nahi hai ,wo tumhara resignation letter hai ,jisme tum sign karoge”apna gala fadte hue Vandana mam boli…“aur yadi tumhe resignation letter par sign nahi karna hai toh, jo dusara blank letter hai…uspar tum mujhse maafi magoge aur is office me kaam karne wale har ek member ka sign loge….ab choice tumhari hai ki tum kya choose karna chahte ho ”

“par mam ye toh sarasar…”

“no sorry…no excuse…”

Maine Vandana Rathi ki taraf dekha….kitna ghamand tha uske andar aur kaise choot jaisi shakl bana kar wo mujhpe baras rahi thi…par ye samay josh me aane ka nahi tha…kyunki , mujhe is naukri ki shakt zaroorat thi upar se main naukri milne ki khushi me aaj raat ko sabko party bhi de raha tha…yadi josh josh me maine resignation letter par sign kar diya toh kya bolunga un sabse…David toh isi intezaar me baitha rahta hai ki kab wo mujhe neecha dikha sake….abhi tak toh main isliye itna udd raha tha kyunki mere paas naukri thi…Varun ko kya bolunga aur kab tak uske paise par aish karta rahunga…maine gaur kiya hai ki jabse maine Sharda Vihar join kiya hai wo mujhse khush rahta hai….warna pahle kabhi-kabhi wo mujhse chidh jata tha… in sabhi problems ko main door kar sakta hoon sirf ek letter se, jisme mujhe Vandana Rathi se sirf sorry bolna tha aur office me kaam karne wale pure staff ke sirf signature lene the…simple…ye baat alag hai ki phhir office me kaam karne wale sare log mujhpar hasenge aur meri izzat down ho jayegi…lekin itna toh main kar hee sakta hoon….

“toh , kya choose kiya tumne…”meri khilli udane wale andaz me R.Rathi mujhse puchhi...

“Resignation……”maine jawab diya

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“what…..seriously ?”apni aankhe badi karke Vandana Rathi boli….jiske jawab me maine apne jeb se goggle nikalkar pahana…

“that’s Shri Arman for you………bitches….ye raha resignation letter me mera sign…”

Resignation letter me sign markar main utha aur seedhe Sharda Vihar ke bahar aaya…aur angadayi lete hue khud se kaha “BC, phhir se berojgar…ab phhir se resume dalna padega…phhir se interview dena padega aur phhir se naye logo se milna padega….that’s why i hate everyone”
.


Kitna ajeeb ittefaq tha ki jis din main apne naukri lagne ki party de raha tha usi din meri naukri mujhse chhoot gayi thi…par main ye sab kisi ko nahi bata sakta tha…na Nisha ko aur na hee Varun ko….isliye aaj mujhe mere naukri lagne ki party deni hee thi…maine Sharda complex ke paas bane ATM me apna balance check kiya….jis factory me main pahle kaam karta tha un logo ne mere teen mahine ki salary mujhe naukri se nikalte waqt de di thi aur usme se ab mere paas kitna bacha hai yahi check karne ke liya main ATM me ghusa….

“ bas 30,000…itne se kya hoga …jaldi hee dusari job dhoondani padegi…ek kidney bech doon kya ,BC…pura tension hee khatm”

“wo bhi koyi nahi lega,…alchoholic kidney”

“toh phhir kya karu”

“itna ameer dost hai, itni ameer girlfriend hai…aur kya chahiye tujhe , bas dono se ladayi mat karna….”

“ tera matlab equilibrium phenomenon use karu…matlab ki dono ke sath equilibrium me rahu ? ”

“yo, Version 3.0”

“samajh gaya…ab dekh main kaise Equilibrium banata hoon …thanx , Version 2.0”

“ you’re most welcome….3.0”
.

Sharda Enterprises se nikale jaane ke baad chahe main jitna bhi cool rahne ka dikhawa kar loon…chahe jitne bhi jokes maru ya chutiyapa karu…par haqiqat toh ye thi ki main andar se bahut udas tha isliye main chup chap auto me bina koyi bawal khada kiye apne room pahucha aur room pahuchte hee maine dekha ki waha ka toh mahol hee alag hai….mere flat me is waqt Varun apne kuch dosto ke sath flat ko sajane me laga hua tha aur un sabko lead kar rahi thi…Sonam  maaadharchod…choot ki jhat…. maine dekha ki Sonam mere bed par khadi hokar…mere bed pe khadi hokar…mere…bed…peeee….khadi….hoo…kar…Varun & comapany ko instruction de rahi thi…wo kabhi kisi ko ,chair idhar se udhar khiskane ko bolti toh kabhi kisi ko fugga fulane ke liye bol rahi thi….Varun toh BC balcony me jhadu mar raha tha….. gandu ,sala….

“itna chutiyapa kaise kar lete hai ye log….itna khush toh tab main khud nahi tha , jab meri job lagi thi….upar se ab toh Rathi ne laat markar bhaga diya hai….aur Varun…ye toh ,lawda…choot ke peeche pata nahi kya-kya karega….pahle Reema aur ab Sonam….wo toh friendynamic ke mere first law ne mujhe rok rakha hai…warna Sonam ko aisa jhadta ki har jagah se jhad jati….dekho toh BC ko kaise role pel rahi hai ,wo bhi mere bistar par khade hokar….aur lawda ye Varun….ise koyi kaam dham nahi hai kya….”un sabko waha dekhkar maine socha aur phhir plan kiya ki sar dard ka bahana markar chupke se ek kinare aankh band karke sad songs sununga…

“arey Arman..aaj tu ,itni jaldi aa gaya”mujhe dekhkar Varun ne jhadu wahi balcony me feka aur mere paas aaya….

“kya isi din ke liye uncle-aunty ne tujhe pal poskar bada kiya tha ki tu ek ladki ke kahne par jhadu mare….aur ye kya natak laga rakha hai be…ye fugga-vugga kyun fula rahe ho…”

“guess kar”

“isme guess karne wali kaun si baat hai…mere naukri chhootne I mean mere naukri lagne ki khushi me party hone wali hai…”

“pagal hai kya…uske liye main itni taiyari karunga kya…guess kar”

“bata na”

“Sonam se main ab shadi karunga….”

“shadi…aur Sonam se…abey, tera dimag toh sahi hai na aur tu mujhe ab bata raha hai…matlab ye sab kab….kaise…kyun…what the fuck…”
Sonam se Varun shadi karne ke mood me hai, ye sunkar mere chehre ka rang hee udd gaya…matlab rang toh pahle se hee uda hua tha par ab mera pura chehra rangheen ho gaya tha…mujhe samajh nahi aata ki mere jaan pahchan wale aksar usi shaks se shadi kyun karte hai,jise main pasand nahi karta hoon…pahle Vipin bhaiya ne Pandey ji ki badi beti se shadi ki…matlab karne wale the aur ab Varun , Sonam ke sath set hone ja raha hai…

“toh ye party mere naukri lagne ki khushi me nahi hai” 

“do-do baar party dega kya naukri lagne ki khushi me… ? ”

“do-do bar se tera matlab..”jeb se cigarette nikalkar muh me fasate hue maine puchha…


“dekh yaha abhi Sonam hai aur thodi der me uski friends bhi aa jayegi toh please cigarette mat pi…”mere muh se cigarette nikal kar dustbin me nishana lagakar Varun bola… “I missed it ….as expected….Arman, tu kaise kar leta hai ye ”
“yadi nishana kharab hai toh thoda daye ya baye nishana laga…guarantee toh nahi hai par kabhi-kabhi tukka lag jata hai aur main kaise karta hoon, ye toh na hee main tujhe bata sakta hoon aur na hee tu samajh sakta hai…I mean…isme angle…height…dustbin se distance …sab calculate karna padta hai…khair chhod ,tu kya bol raha tha ki main do-do party dunga kya naukri ki ? par wo toh maine Nisha ko di hai na …tum logo ko kaha di…ab ye mat bolna ki Nisha ko party de di…matlab tum sabko de di…seedhe-seedhe bol ki tune Sonam ke kahne par meri party cancel kar di hai…ye jyada ghuma-fira kar baat karne ki na toh mujhe aadat hai aur na hee sunne ki…”

“tu Mazak kar raha hai na…”thoda haste hue Varun ne mujhse kaha

“no..”

“abey kal hee toh tune hum sabko ,is flat me party di thi…tu maal(ganja) peekar aaya hai kya aur tu Nisha ke sath mall kal nahi parso gaya tha”

“ab, tu Mazak kar raha hai…”

“dekh Arman mere paas faltu baat ke liye time nahi hai…kya, tujhe sach me kal raat ka kuch bhi yaad nahi hai…ya tu bas aise hee time pass kar raha hai…yadi timepass kar raha hai toh thik hai, warna tu mere sath abhi doctor ke paas chal”bolte hue Varun ne apna mobile jeb se nikala aur mujhe kal raat ki photos dikhane laga…

“ye dekh…tu kaise kal daru pee ke langar dance kar raha tha…”

“actually main, Mazak kar raha tha…yar…tu toh janta hee hai mujhe”Varun ke hath se maine mobile liya aur apne bistar par ek kinare jakar baith gaya….
.

“Ye photo to meri hee hai aur location bhi humare flat ki hee hai…”apna sar ko ek hath se dabate hue Varun ke mobile me apne photos ko dekhkar maine socha“toh kya iska matlab Varun sach kah raha tha…? par mujhe toh kal raat ka kuch bhi yaad nahi…kal raat ka kya mujhe toh kal din ka bhi kuch yaad nahi hai…ye kaise mumkin hai…kahi ye sab log milkar mujhse koyi game toh nahi khel rahe…par in photos me toh main bhi full enjoy kar raha hai…phhir mujhe kal ka kaise kuch yad nahi hai…chalo maan lete hai ki maine pel ke daru pee hogi aur mujhe kuch yaad nahi raha hoga…lekin BC kal pura din maine kya kiya…office toh gaya nahi..warna resignation letter Vandana Rathi kal hee thama deti…kya ho raha hai ye…situation toh din ba din bigadti ja rahi hai…kuch toh sochna padega…”

“Arman, ek kaam kar doge kya….”mere bistar par khadi Sonam ne jab mujhe pukara toh mera dhyan uski taraf gaya aur maine haan me apni garden hilayi….
“balloons shayad kam pad jayenge…tum jakar do packet aur le aaoge please”

“balloons matlab”maine pucha

Aur mere aisa puchhte hee waha mauzood har ek shaks chauk gaya , wo sab jo-jo kaam kar rahe the ,wo sab kaam chhodkar meri taraf dekhne lage…jisase main samajh gaya ki zaroor maine kuch aisa kiya hai, jo ekdum se unexpected raha hoga….

“Sonam, tumne kya kaha…maine thik se suna nahi”

“maine kaha ki, balloons kam pad jayenge…tum dukan se aur do packet le aao”

“main hoon lene jata balloons….mera matlab main balloons lene jata hoon”apne laal hue chehre par hath ferkar main bola aur flat se bahar aa gaya

“balloons…what the hell is this…”google me search marte hue main badbadaya aur jab mujhe balloons ki pics google me dikhi toh maine apna sar peet liya…

“ise balloons kahte hai…balloon ….balloons ….balloon….lagta hai aaj kal jo mere dimag me chal raha hai us-se mere sochne samajhne ki Shakti par bhi asar pad raha hai…warna main kya ye nahi janunga ki balloon ka matlab kya hota hai… faltu me bezzati ho gayi”
.


“kya chahiye….”jab main ek dukan par gaya toh us dukan wale ne mujhe dekh kar kaha

“mujhe…kya bolte hai use….”kahte hue main apne hath ko gol gol ghumane laga taki dukandar samajh jaye ki mujhe kya chahiye….maine apne muh ke andar hawa bharkar hanuman ji ke mafiq apna muh bhi fulaya ,lekin dukandar samajhne ki bajay meri taraf gusse se dekhne laga….

“chal be ,nikal…pagal sala”meri ajeeb –ajeeb harkate dekhkar dukandar ne kaha

“kis chutiye ko dukan me baitha ke rakhe ho be….grahak ko gali deta hai..ye sale naukar”

“naukar kisko bola be…tu naukar kisko bola”meri taraf taav se badhte hue wo cheekha..

“yaha tere aalawa aur koyi hai kya be…jo kisi aur bolunga…tujhe hee bola”

“aise kaise tune mujhe naukar bola…”

“dekh bhai…tera role jyada nahi hai…isliye jyada dialogue bol kar scene lamba mat kar….aur jaldi se do packet…ye de….”bolkar maine mobile me dukandar ko balloons ki pic dikhayi ,jo maine raste me download kar li thi…

“nahi dunga…”

“dekh lawda, jyada mat uchak….warna muh me mutth mar dunga…”

“teri toh…ruk tu”bahar meri taraf badhte hue wo phhir cheekha….

jiske turant baad maine mere samne dukan me rakhi chocolates ke dibbe me se ek dibba uthaya aur uska dhakkan kholkar pura ka pura dibba wahi zameen me bikher diya….Mere dwara dibba kholkar chocolates bikherne ke karan ab dukandar meri taraf na aakar neeche giri hui chocolates uthane me lag gaya tha aur main bade aaram se waha se khisak liya…….
.

“kitni der kar di tumne Arman….kya kar rahe the tum itni der…”jab main room pahucha toh gusse se Sonam mujhse boli….

“Sonam…teri na, main maa chod dunga…tu mujhse baat mat kiya kar”

“ab aise kya dekh rahe ho…kuch bologe bhi….”abki baar aur tez se Sonam boli

“kya ise gali sunayi nahi di ? ya maine gali di hee nahi ?”

“chhodo bhi…”mere hath se balloons ka packet chheenkar Sonam ne mujhe dhikkara aur saaj sajawat ke kaam me wapas busy ho gayi….

Mera khas dost Varun shadi karne ka faisla le raha tha...isliye mujhe khush hona chahiye tha aur raat ko jo function rakha gaya tha usme uski madad karna chahiye tha lekin is samay na toh main khush tha aur na hee unki koyi madad kar raha tha….Varun ne jab balcony me jhadu mar diya toh main balcony me jakar khada ho gaya aur balcony me khade hokar colony me bane flats ko dekhne laga…

“Vandana Rathi ka flat , wo udhar hoga… E Series me…raat me jakar sali ko tochan du kya ?…lekin agar usne police me complain kar di toh ? chhod deta hoon randi ko….warna khamkha police ka lafda ho jayega…”

Isliye filhal maine Vandana mam ko tochan dene ka khayal apne mann se nikala aur colony me bane dusare makan ki taraf dekhne laga….main waha bahut der tak khada raha aur waha bane makano ka deedar karta raha…aur phhir kisi ne peeche se mujhe aawaz di…

“ja be…Varun bula raha hai…kahi jana hai usko”

“Varun ..mujhe bula raha hai….par....”


Main apni baat bhi complete nahi kar paya tha ki mujhe aisa laga jaise kisi ne koyi bhari chiz mere sar par de mari ho….mera pura bheja hil gaya aur uske baad ek baar phhir se mujhe wahi aawaz sunayi dobara di….matlab dobara sunayi di

“ja be…Varun bula raha hai…kahi jana hai usko”

“tune mujhe mara…teri toh”gusse se tharrate hue main peeche palta aur jaise hee peeche muda mera pura gussa chhoo mantar ho gaya…..

“Vipin bhaiya…? ”

“dekh Arman…tujhe toh pata hee hai ki papa ko tera Varun ke sath ghoomna pasand nahi hai aur wo Varun….ye sab jante hue bhi tujhse milne aaya hai”

“aaj taarikh kaun si hai”

“15th July ”

“ 2009 ?”

Maine Vipin bhaiya se saal kya puch liya ,wo mujhe aise dekhne lage jaise maine unse saal nahi balki unki item ka figure puchh liya ho….

“haan…2009 hee chal raha hai ”

“15th july , 2009…yani abhi hum dono ki school me ladayi nahi hui hai…”

“kya matlab hai tera ki hum dono ki ladayi nahi hui hai…kal hee toh maine tujhe ground me do thappad mara tha…”

“ye sab Psychological baatein hai…aapke palle nahi padegi…aur kal ground me do thappad mara toh mara…faltu me audience ko batakar meri bezzati kyun kar rahe ho…anyway…”bolkar main apne ghar ki balcony se neeche aaya , jaha Varun sofe par baithkar mera intezaar kar raha tha…..

waha mere mammi-papa dono mauzood the aur mujhe seedhiyo se neeche aata dekh mujhe ghoor kar dekhne lage…mano mann hee mann mujhse kah rahe ho ki….yadi main, Varun ke sath abhi bahar gaya toh mera hath kaat kar mere hath me de denge….

“hey Varun…aaj kiske sath match hai…”seedhiyo se neeche aakar maine Varun se puchha…

“S.S.M. ki team se…”

“chal phhir…”

Main Varun ke sath bahar aaya aur bahar aate hee uspar baras lada…

“kyun bhai…ghar se nikalwayega kya…kitni baar kaha hai ki mere ghar mat aaya kar…yadi yahi haal raha toh tu dekhna ek din mere gharwale mere pichhwade me laat markar mujhe ghar se nikal denge…..chal bol kya baat hai… ”

“family problem ? ”

“ab tere us Engineer bhai ne kya kar diya…yahi hota hai jab har koyi bhi engineering karne lagta hai toh….anyway ,chal bata kya problem hai…”

Jawab me Varun chup hee raha ,isliye maine thoda aur bal lagakar kaha….

“abki baar tere bade bhai ne kuch kya…ya phhir tere baap ne…”

“bhaiya aur papa ke beech phhir kaha suni ho gayi hai…papa ne bhaiya ko itna sunaya ki wo suicide karne ki dhamki dekar ghar se chale gaye hai…mujhe ab bahut dar lag raha hai yar…samajh me nahi aa raha ki kya karu…kaha jaun…maine bhaiya ko bahut dhoondha lekin wo mile hee nahi…isliye tere paas aa gaya ”

“kitne der pahle ghar se nikle the…”

“do ghante pahle…aisa mom ne bataya…main toh Gaurav ke sath bahar ghoom raha tha…. ”

“kaun Gaurav …wahi D section wala…”

“haan…”

“uske sath mat ghuma kar…uski niyat kharab hai…matlab mujhe sahi nahi lagta wo…acha time bata…”

“5 baje hai…”


jab actual me yani ki jab main version 1.0 ke roop me 2009 me tha tab Varun ke bhaiya ko dhoondate dhoondate raat ho gayi thi…lekin ab jab ye sab main ek baar pahle bhi jhel chuka tha…isliye mujhe pata tha ki mujhe kaha jana hai…

“mujhe maloom hai ki tera bhai kaha hoga”

“sach..?”apna stress thoda kam karte hue Varun ne puchha…

“haan…lekin ab tu ye mat puchhna ki ye sab mujhe kaise pata…bas tu mere sath chal…”

“ok…”

“aur sale tu mere liye ek shayari likhne wala tha…ek mahine ho gaye lekin tune mujhe shayari nahi sunayi…lagta hai tu mera sachcha dost nahi hai..main khamkha tere liye itna kuch kar jata hoon ”

“aaj raat me pakka…”

“lawda ,yahi bol-bol ke kitne din tarka diye tune…”ye kahkar maine apna hath bandha aur ek mukka Varun ki peeth me pel diya….

“itni tez….abey sach me…maine toh ek line soch bhi li hai…sunau kya ?”apni peeth sahlate hue Varun bola aur kheechkar ek mukka usne bhi meri peeth me rel diya…

“haa…suna”main bhi apni peeth sahlate hue bola

“toh sun…Arz kiya hai…” 

“irshaad..irshaad”

“arz kiya hai…Aasmano ke falaq par kuch rang aaj bhi baki hai…”

“aage bol…”

“bas itna hee socha hai abhi…”

“teri toh…abhi tak sirf jhat barabar line sochi hai…wo bhi galat…”ek mukka phhir Varun ki peeth me pelte hue main bola aur abki baar maine bahut jor se mukka pela tha…taaki Varun…mukke ka reply mukke se na karke dard se cheekhte hue kare aur aisa hee hua…


Varun ki gand fat gayi aur wo jaha par khada tha wahi dard se karahte hue baith gaya…thodi der tak toh usne sirf mujhe galiya di aur phhir jab uska dard kuch normal hua toh khade hokar mujhse puchha…

“kaun se shabd galat hai be…”

“aasman ko urdu me falaq kahte hai…ab gaur kar…aasmano ke falaq par kuch rang aaj bhi baaki hai…”

“feel the pain, man…feel the pain…”

“kaisa pain…mujhe toh koyi pain hee nahi hai…”

“aayega…pain bhi aayega…aur tab ye line complete ho jayegi…”

“ok then..”bolte hue main achanak ruka….


Main ruka kyunki maine dekha ki samne se exams me mere peeche baithne wala lawda…I mean launda bike me akele kahi se aa raha tha…un dino bike ka name hee mujhe super excited kar deta tha aur mujhe jab-jab mauka milta tha main yun hee dosto ki bike mang kar chalane lag jata tha….dosto ki bike…kyunki gharwali bike par toh Vipin bhaiya ne kabja jama rakha tha aur wo mujhe bike kya…bike ki chabhi tak chhune nahi dete the… 
.

“rook be…”wo ladka jiska roll number aksar exams me mere baad aata tha uske samne jakar maine kaha. maine use kyun roka hai…ye usne shayad pahle hee taad liya tha…isliye main use kuch bolta uske pahle hee wo bol utha…

“Arman , abhi mujhe urgent kaam hai…isliye main tujhe bike nahi de sakta”

“aisa…chal phhir thik hai”uske samne se hatkar main bola “exams me jab tu mujhse koyi question puchhega toh main bhi yahi bolunga ki…bhai mujhe urgent kaam hai…main tujhe abhi iska answer nahi bata sakta”

“thik hai..acha chal, le jaa…jab dekho tab exams ki dhamki deta rahta hai…”bike se utarte hue usne kaha…

“thanks…”bike ka handle pakadte hue main muskuraya aur Varun ko peechhe baithne ka ishara kiya…

“main nahi baithunga...last time jab tere sath baitha tha toh tune gira diya tha…”door hat te hue Varun ne bike me baithne se saaf mana kar diya…

“abey baith ja…wo tab ki baat thi…ab toh main bike se…parablla..hyperbola bana leta hoon…wooooooo”bike ka handle ghumate hue main bola “aaj ellipse banaunga ”

“tu chahe jitna bol le…main nahi baithne wala…last time tune mujhse bike nikalwayi aur phhir bike girakar bhag gaya tha…wo bhi mujhe akela chhodkar…pata hai gharwalo ne kitni galiya di mujhe…”

“kyun bhav kha raha hai..baith na yar…ya ab Shahrukh khan ke mafiq ‘main hoon na’ bolu tabhi tu baithega”

Finally Varun bike par baitha aur use lekar main waha gaya jaha uska bada bhai tha….yani ki daru bhatti…lekin ek chiz jo maine gaur ki wo ye ki time bahut speed se badh raha tha…main apne ghar se sham ko 5 baje nikla tha aur yaha tak mujhe anyhow 5:30 baje tak pahuch jaana chahiye tha…lekin jab maine bike se utar kar time dekha toh is samay 8 baj rahe the…ye lagbhag wahi samay tha jab real me maine Varun ke bhaiya ko suicide karne se roka tha…maine apni ghadi me dobara nazar mari…seconds ki sui bahut tez ghoom rahi thi aur usi ke hisab se baki sui bhi….minute ki sui aise ghoom rahi thi jaise wo second ki sui ho aur ghante ki sui aise jaise wo minute ki sui ho…yaani ki time bahut tezi se aage badh raha tha….aur mere bike se utar kar daru bhatti tak pahuchne me maine jab time dekha toh 8:30 baj chuke the….bhatti ke andar ahata me Varun ka bada bhai full load tha…yaha tak ki hume pahchan tak nahi pa raha tha….

“Varun….ja jakar nibbo pani lekar aa…”Varun ke bhai ke bagal me baithkar maine Varun se kaha

“us-se kya hoga”

“ye tu hamesha itne sawal kyun puchhte rahta hai…ye koyi physics ki class hai kya ? ja jakar nibbo paani ka jugad jama …”Varun ko fatkar lagakar maine uske bade bhai ki taraf apna rukh kiya“aur bade bhaiya…kaun sa brand liya….”samne rakhi botal ko uthate hue maine puchha…

“kaun…”halki si aankh kholkar Varun ke bhai ne kaha aur phhir apni aankh band kar li…

“ what the fuck…arey main hoon….Arman”

“kaun Arman…”abki baar aankh band karke hee Varun ke bhaiya ne jawab diya…

“Varun ko jante ho…”
“Va…va…Varun….Varun , koyi maal hai kya…”
“hadd hai…”
“kya hadd hai…”apni aankhe thodi kholkar Varun ke bade bhai ne puchha…jiske jawab me maine kuch nahi kaha….jiske baad Varun ke bhaiya ne phhir apni aankhe band kar li aur aankh band kiye hue hee bole…
“tum gaanja peete ho kya…”
“nahi…”maine jawab diya….itne me nibbo pani lekar Varun bhi aa gaya….maine ishare se Varun ko cool rahne ke liye kaha aur nibbo pani ka glass Varun ke bhaiya ko thamate hue bola…..
“lo, pahle peg maro…phhir baat karte hai…”
“nahi…bas ho gaya…ab mujhe suicide karne jana hai…tang aa gaya hoon main is duniya se…”
“suicide…great idea…lekin uske pahle golden peg toh marte jao…”
“thik hai…”bolte hue Varun ke bhaiya ne nibbo pani ka glass uthaya aur ek saans me pura glass khali kar diya….
“ye toh nibbo pani hai be lawde….jo tune mujhe daru bolkar pila diya…”gusse se mera collar pakadkar unhone kaha…
“jis tarah ye nibbo pani hai…daru nahi, usi tarah Varun aapka bhai hai…maal nahi…”apne collar se Varun ke bhaiya ka hath hatakar maine kaha.. “Varun bhaiya…I mean…Varun ke bhaiya , kya ho gaya hai aap ko…aap toh ekdum hoshiyar ,tez tarrar ladke the…phhir Engineering ne aapke DNA par aisa kya effect dala jo ab aap aise ho gaye…”
“Engineering…BC….puri life barbaad kar di engineering ne meri…tumhe pata hai ek samay main padhne me bahut hoshiyar tha, lekin phhir maine Engineering karne ki galti ki…jiske baad sab kuch badal gaya. main hindi medium ka student tha…isliye shuru-shuru me mujhe problem hui…sabse jyada dimag khaya Physics ne…kya BC ,sodium light se aand-gand experiments karke puri process yaad karna padta tha. lab tha , lekin waha kiye gaye experiments BC kisliye the aaj tak samajh nahi aaya. jitna manhoos subject tha us-se kayi jyada manhoos is subject ka teacher tha. use dekhkar hee padhne-likhne ka mood nahi hota tha…aur mere pure syllabus me ek bhi aisa interesting chapter nahi tha, jisko padhne ka mann kare. Pata nahi kis haramkhor ne syllabus set kiya tha, uski maa ka alpha, beta….main tumhe topics batata hoon…topics kuch aise the… the Fringe phenomenon…Polarisation….Carnot cycle…otto cycle…lund cycle…choot cycle. ye sab kya hai lawda…mujhe toh name sun ke hee ulti hoti hai … college me Physics padhne se acha hota ki main suicide kar leta aur…aur Mere khayal se wo jyada better rahta… Physics ne meri haalat aise kar di thi ki main jo kuch bhi padhta…wo sab dimag ke andar toh jata tha lekin kabhi bahar nahi aaya….na class me aur na hee examps me…sirf padhte jao…padhte jao…apni gaand marwate jao…”
“aapka dimag black hole ban gaya tha kya, jisme sirf incoming thi aur outgoing bilkul band thi….”
“ jiska nateeza first semester back….second semester back….ispar se job ki tension alag….kyunki main Engineering college me jaane ke kuch din baad hee ye jaan gaya tha ki…jobs ki kya conditions hai. Upar se main tha Government college me aur College walo ko toh jaise humare future ki koyi fikar hee nahi thi….unhe kya fark padne wala tha ki students padhe ya na padhe…unhe toh barabar salary mil rahi thi…kya tum yakin karoge ki 60 saal purine Government college me mere hod ko chhodkar koyi permanent faculty nahi tha...uspar bhi guest teacher aise the ki un maa ke lawdo se ek question bhi koyi puchh le toh unki dayi-mayi chud jati thi…aur sectional ki dhamki dekar wo students ko class attend karne ke liye mazboor kar dete the…ispar bhi yadi koyi placement company college ke name ki vazah se galti se humare college me aa bhi jati thi toh BC college wale unki koyi kadra nahi karte the…Private college walo ki tarah humare college walo ko bhi chahiye ki unke chay paani ka intezam kare..lekin nahi, college walo ka toh apna hee randi rona tha…bolte the ki iska fund kaha se aayega…sale dalle…madarchod… wo log college ke peon ko placement walo ke paas bhej dete the…ab bhai, placement walo ki bhi koyi izzat hai. Wo waha bheekh magne toh aaye nahi hai..jo tum unke sath aisa bartaav karo…isliye jo bhi company humare college me ek baar aati…next year se wo humare college ki taraf dekh kar thookti bhi nahi thi…yani ki next year se companies ne aana band kar diya…idhar dusari taraf mere back pe back lagte gaye….tension me college jana to door ki baat maine 4th semester ke exam tak nahi diye….mujhe itna stress tha ki main fifth semester me hee suicide kar leta yadi meri life me Anjana nahi aayi hoti toh…pahle wo meri friend bani aur phhir mere dil ki dhadkan…uski vazah se maine 5th sem se college aana shuru kiya aur phhir dheere-dheere padhayi me mera interest badha….tab mujhe samajh aaya ki mujhse kitni badi galti ho gayi hai…maine apni zindagi ke aham do saal yun hee in madarchodo ke karan tension me barbaad kar diye the….lekin phhir bhi maine haar nahi mani aur Anjana ke sath-sath padhayi me bhi interest lene laga….jiski vazah se 7th sem tak mere sirf do hee back the…lekin BC us 8th semester ne mere growth rate ko wapas neeche dhakel diya….”
“nice… aisa kya hua tha 8th Semester me…”side me rakha Varun ke bhaiya ka peg chupke se uthakar marte hue maine beech me pucha….
“8th Semester me…8th semester me mujhe pata chala ki Anjana kisi aur launde se set hai…mujhse toh sirf wo pyar ka natak kar rahi thi aur mere pahle bhi usne college me do-teen ke sath yahi kiya tha….maine kya-kya nahi kiya tha uske liye…raat-raat bhar jagkar uske bare me socha karta tha…raat-raat bhar jaagkar use kaise hasau sirf yahi socha karta tha…raat-raat bhar jaagkar uske liye ppt taiyar kiya karta tha… uske liye notes ki photo copy karata tha… lekin jab mujhe pata chala ki Anjana mujhse nahi kisi aur se pyar karti hai toh…maine use kuch nahi kaha , na toh us-se kuch pucha aur na hee us-se koyi baat ki…din bhar main sirf apne room me rahta…Anjana ke bare me sochta…uske sath bitaye waqt ko yaad karke rota…Anjana ke bina bitaya har ek din sadiyo ke barabar lagta tha…tab mujhe samajh aaya ki pyar me aadmi sirf andha hee nahi balki chodu bhi ban jata hai..”
“ek din…ek sadi ke barabar…yani ki theory of relativity..”ek aur peg chupke se marte hue maine kaha 
“maine bahut koshish ki Anjana ki mohabbat ko nafrat me badalne ki…lekin main aisa nahi kar paya…main Anjana se jitni nafrat karne ki koshish karta us-se mujhe utna hee adhik pyar ho raha tha aur jab wo mere sath nahi thi toh ye pyar din ba din aur tezi ke sath badhte ja raha tha…8th semester ke ant me mujhe laga ki main pagal ho jaunga…jis-se bachnne ka sirf ek hee rasta tha…suicide…maine suicide karne ki koshish bhi ki…maine ek din decide kiya ki main train ke samne aakar Anjana se…Engineering se…aur is duniya se hamesha ke liye muqt ho jaunga…isliye maine train ke saamne koodne ka decision liya…lekin aain waqt par na jaane mere dost kaha se aa gaye aur unhone mujhe bacha liya….”bolte-bolte Varun ke bhai ne pause mara aur phhir thodi der baad phhir se bolna chalu kiya“tumhe pata hai is duniya ka sabse lachar vyakti kaun hai…? Is duniya ka sabse lachar vyakti wo hai jo is duniya se ,is duniya ke logo se nirash hokar marna chahta hai lekin wo mar nahi pata…aur use bachane wala koyi aur nahi balki isi duniya ke wo log hote hai…jinse wo beinteha nafrat karta hai….mera matlab…us shaks se jyada lachar aur kaun ho sakta hai…jo marna toh chahe lekin mar na paye…aura b main bahut depression me hoon…mujhe ab na toh kisi chiz ki koyi chah hai aur na hee kisi se milne ki ichchha aur na hee kuch karne ka junoon mere andar bacha hai… par kabhi-kabhi main sochta hoon ki life kitni haseen hoti yadi Anjana mere sath hoti…tab shayad mere 8th semester ka ant aise na hota aur na hee main aisa hota…lekin mera dil tab aur bhi jyada dukhta hai jab mere gharwale meri halat par gaur nahi karte…unhe toh bas laakho kamane wala beta chahiye…mere sare dost meri situation ko samajhte hai…aas-paas ke sabhi log mera hausla badhate hai…lekin is mushqil waqt me mere pariwar wale jinki mujhe sakht zaroorat hai wahi mujhse khafa hai…kya mere gharwalo ko mahsoos nahi hota…wo dard jo main jhel raha hoon…kya unhe meri halat dikhayi nahi deti…ya phhir wo sab kuch jaan kar bhi aisa bartaav kar rahe hai…yadi aisa hai toh phhir mere yaha rahne ka kya fayda…mujhe toh mar jaana chahiye. isiliye aaj main suicide karunga…aksar mere man me ye khayal aata hai ki bhagwan kyun mujhe wo sab kuch nahi de deta jo main chahta hoon…jise paane ke liye maine mehnat ki…phhir main un logo ko dekhta hoon jinke paas wo hai aur tab main samajh jata hoon wo log…wo chize jinhe main pana chahta tha…wo mere layak hee nahi hai…”
“aisa nahi hai bade bhaiya…ye sab hota hai…sabke sath toh nahi par…hota hai.”
“lekin main khud ko kaise samjhaun ki mere gharwale hee mere khilaf hai…wo samajh hee nahi rahe meri situation ko…jabki unke aalawa har koyi turant meri situation samajh jata hai….”
“aapke gharwalo ke aalawa baki sab aapki situation samajh jate hai kyunki unhone aap me apna paisa aur samay invest nahi kiya…aap ek kaam kariye…aap apne dost ya un logo ke paas jayiye jo aapse sahanubhuti dikhate hai aur unse wo sab karne ko kahiye jo aapke maa-baap ne aapke liye kiya hai…phhir aap boliye unki us sari mehnat ko aapne college me sirf ek ladki ke chakkar me barbaad kar diya aur phhir unka reaction dekhiye…kya hoga ? abki baar unka reaction sahanubhuti wala nahi balki pichhwade me laat marne wala hoga…ye jo aapke dost hai ya phhir aapse free ki sahanubhuti dikhane wale log hai…unhone aapke liye wo sab kuch nahi kiya…jo aapke ma baap ne kiya hai…isliye in tuchche logo se apne ma-baap ki tulna mat kijiye…..aap ghar jao…competitive exams ki taiyari karo aur exam clear karke apni life track par le aao…this is the best you can do…baki aap jaha suicide karne jaane wale ho…waha aaj police ki patrolling chal rahi hai…isliye aaj suicide karne mat jana, warna khamkha police case banega…. aur…”

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Chapter-13 : The Detachment 

Varun ke bade bhaiya se baat karte waqt maine socha ki isme se toh 50 % mere sath bhi hua hai…bas mere kabhi back nahi lage…. mujhe pahle se hee pata tha ki college me mujhe kya karna hai aur kya nahi karna hai… lekin phhir bhi maine wo kiya..jo mujhe nahi karna chahiye tha.upar se main apna hee wo rule follow nahi kar raha hoon jise follow karne ki salah maine abhi-abhi Varun ke bhai ko di thi…jaise ke apne maa-baap ki tulna logo se mat karo…vagerah-vagerah aur is tarah ek baar phhir main khud hee apne banaye rule ko follow nahi kar raha tha… Main abhi ye sab bhatti me baithkar soch hee raha tha ki mere side me baitha Varun mujhe pakad kar hilane laga aur jor-jor se mera name pukarne laga….

“Arman….Arman…abey…kaha kho gaya..”

“mujhe kyun pakad ke hila raha hai…hilana hai toh apne bhai ka hila…mera matlab apne bhai ko hila”

“bhai ko hilau…tu hai kaha…”

“dekh Varun… jab main kuch achchhi baate kar raha hota hoon toh tu mujhe disturb mat kiya kar , warna ekat din mood kharab hua toh pel-pal dunga …tujhe zara bhi andaza hai ki kitna samay aur mehnat lagti hai…aise dialogues sochne me…ab tu mujhe hilana band kar warna main wapas jate samay aaj phhir tujhe bike se gira dunga….”

“tu bol kya raha hai…meri toh kuch samajh me nahi aa raha…par tu ab hosh me aa …wo dekh Nisha aa gayi hai and she is looking damn hot and sexy…”

“Nisha ? ”


Maine apne aaju-baju dekha…main ab bhi daru bhatti me hee tha…par is waqt na toh waha Varun tha aur na hee uska bhai…infact is waqt puri bhatti me koyi nahi tha..sab achanak se gayab ho gaye the…jis-se mere mann me aaya ki main do-char botar daru chura kar bhag jaun… lekin phhir maine apne samne wali deewar ko dekha toh paya ki uska shape aur size bahut jaldi jaldi badal raha tha…kabhi laal toh kabhi neela…aur thodi der ke baad ye parivartan charo taraf hone laga…ab mere samne wo table nahi thi jisme maine apne liye ek aur peg bana kar rakha hua tha…

“ye toh mera ghar hai…aur main balcony me kyun khada hoon…main toh thodi der pahle Varun ke sath daru bhatti me tha…aur ye aawaz kaisi hai”

“ja be…Varun bula raha hai…kahi jana hai usko”

Aur phhir pahle ki tarah mere sar ko ek jor ka jhatka laga lekin abki baar wala jhatka itna tez tha ki mere body ke sare purje hil gaye aur main wahi balcony me apna sar pakad kar baith gaya 

“tu bol kya raha hai…meri toh kuch samajh me nahi aa raha…par tu ab hosh me aa …wo dekh Nisha aa gayi hai and she is looking damn hot…”Varun ki aawaz mere kano me gunji…

“lagta hai jyada din zinda nahi rahunga main…yahi haal raha toh brain hemorrhage pakka hai…”

“kya bola…”

“tu rahne de Varun ,ye sab Psychological baate hai…teri samajh me nahi aayegi…tu bas party enjoy kar…”bolte hue maine dheere-dheere apni aankh kholi aur mujhe mere samne thik 90° ke angle par mujhe Nisha dikhayi di…nahi exact 90° pe nahi…wo mujhse 90..89…88..87 …correct. wo mujhe thik 87° par dikhi…jise dekhkar mere sar ka dard dheere-dheere kam hone laga

“tumne apna sar kyun pakad rakha hai”mere paas aakar Nisha puchhi

“wo main, tumhe compliment de raha hoon…tum itni jyada khoobsurat lag rahi ho ki maine apna sar pakad liya…”

“say…you love me”

“ 80 % ”

“100 % bolo na…”

“pagal hai kya…aise me efficiency 1 ho jayegi aur ye physics ke according mumkin nahi hai matlab main aisa koyi kaam nahi karta jo physics ke khilaf ho….my love for physics is forever”

“ok…  ”

.
“par kuch bhi ho…aaj tum kamal lag rahi ho..matlab kitna taiyar hokar aayi ho…itna makeup…kaise kar leti ho ye sab…”Nisha ke chehre par aaye baal ko peeche karte hue maine uske gaal ko pinch kiya… “ye sab real hai…”
“real hai ? matlab ? tumhe shaq hai kya ki tum sapna dekh rahe ho…hmm ? aur yadi tumhe sahq bhi hai toh tumhe khud ko pinch karna chahiye tha…naa ki mujhe”
“main mahan…mera sab kuch mahan. Anyway aaj tera mujhse shadi karne ka toh irada nahi…jo itna saj sawar ke aayi hai..”

“kaha taiyar hokar aayi hoon…simple hee toh hoon…”

“toh ho jaye phhir…”

“kya…”

“wahi…”

“Noooooo…”

“kya yar…tu kahe toh room bhi khali hai ek…matlab maine ek aur flat book kar rakha hai River view me…”

“maine kaha na nahi….”

“aakhiri bar humne kab kiya tha…”

“parso raat me…”

“main kiss ki baat nahi kar raha hoon…arey wo…jisme hum dono bahut hilte hai”

“main kya ab ye yaad rakhungi ki humne last time kab kiya tha ”thoda naraz hote hue Nisha boli

“wahi toh…tujhe yaad bhi nahi ki aakhiri baar humne sex kab kiya tha…isiliye aajkal humare beech aaye din ladayi hoti hai…kyunki hum dono aajkal thik se connect nahi ho pa rahe hai…meri baat maan…chal mere sath…maine ek aur flat book kar rakha hai…chal sex karte hai…”

“Arman…humare beech sex na hone ki vazah se ladayi nahi ho rahi…balki ladayi hone ki vazah se sex nahi ho raha…”
“baat toh wahi hai yar…mera matlab energy koyi si bhi ho,kya fark padta hai..uska unit toh joule hee rahega na…I mean lund choot me dalo ya phhir choot lund me, chudna toh choot ko hee hai na”

“tumne pura mood off kar diya…”
“mood off ho gaya ? mera ek dost hai Arun…wo aksar mera mood off hone par mujhse kahta tha ki ja…mutth mar ke aa…lekin tujhe toh main wo bhi nahi kah sakta…”

“Arman…..this is disgusting ”

“toh thik hai ungali kar le…”kahte hue main has pada aur Nisha ki tone nikalte hue bola “Arman….this is disgusting ” 

“tum aisa kyun karte ho…kya tumhe achchha lagta hai ye sab karke…ya sukoon milta hai…”

“actually meri ek philosophy hai ki jo chize tumhe buri lagti hai unka Mazak banana shuru kar do…phhir wo thoda kam buri lagti hai…”

Ye sunkar Nisha kuch nahi boli aur chup chap apne friends ke paas chali gayi…aur main khud ko koste hue balcony ki taraf mud gaya….
Varun mera khas dost tha…mujhe uski help karni chahiye thi…is waqt mujhe uske sath rahna chahiye tha…lekin main tha ki balcony me hee khada hokar chup chap andar ho rahe ek-ek chiz ko dekh raha tha…maine school life me friendynamics ka ek law banaya tha…jiske according mujhe Sonam ki respect karni chahiye thi…thik usi tarah jis tarah main apni bahan ki karta…yadi wo hoti toh…lekin pichhale kuch dino se main kayi baar apne khud ke law ko hee tod chuka tha aur Sonam ki insult kar chuka tha….yani ki Thermodynamics ke first law ki tarah Friendyanmics ke is law ki bhi kuch limitations thi….yani ki ab samay aa gaya tha jab main friendyamics ka second law parit karu…aur isiliye..bas isiliye maine balcony me khade hokar friendynamic ka second law banaya .jo ki first law se milta julta tha ya phhir kahe ki first law ka modified version tha….

“According to second law of friendynamics… at standard temperatre & pressure(STP), your friend’s girlfriend is equal to your sister and you must have to respect and love her(non-incest) unless you get frustrated with her…after that you can even rape her…….….but from mouth….”
“wow…kyun hoon main itna talented…let’s take a bow ”

Update-39

Quote:
“According to second law of friendynamics… at standard temperatre & pressure(STP), your friend’s girlfriend is equal to your sister and you must have to respect and love her(non-incest) unless you become fucking frustrated…after that you can even rape her…….….but from mouth….”
“wow…kyun hoon main itna talented… let’s take a bow ”

Mere dwara friendynamic ka second law banane tak Varun aur Sonam ki is party me ab bahut jyada log aa chuke the aur main bhi full taiyar hokar abhi bahar hee aaya tha…maine dekha ki party me lagbhag wo sabhi log mauzood the jinhe main janta tha…yani ki David…Shipra…Sonam…Nisha aur Varun ke kuch dost jo ki ek-do baar flat me aaye the…kahne ko toh main bahut logo ko janta tha lekin phhir bhi main bahut akela mahsoos kar raha tha aur mujhe rah-rah kar mere college ki farewell party yaad aa rahi thi…jisme Rajshri Pandey ne meri thali se rasgulla nikal kar kha liya tha…farewell party ko yaad karne se mera mann kiya ki lawda,abhich anchoring kar maru, jaisa ki maine apne farewell party me kiya tha, jisme meri welcome speech kuch aisi thi….

Quote:
"Gentlemen and gentlewomen....tum log soch rahe hoge ki main ab ek shaleen bhara, swachh bhashad prastut karunga...jisme main tum logo ka aabhar vyakt karunga ki aap log yaha aaye, isliye dhanyavaad....yadi tum sab aisa sochate ho to ,bhool jao, kyunki main aisa kuch bhi nahi bolne wala aur main kahe tum ko logo thanks bolu be....ek to free ka khana khaoge, seetiya maroge, langar dance karke pure karyakram ki aisi-taisi karoge...upar se tum sab ye apeksha rakhte ho ki main tum logo ka shukriya ada karu....ladkiyo ka to khair main bahut aadar karta hoon isliye sabke saamne unhe kuchh nahi bolunga ,lekin ladko...tum log apna kaan khol kar sun lo aur yadi jaroorat ho to kuch aur bhi khol kar sun sakte ho...lekin dhyan se sunna....tum me se bahut aise honge, jo khud ko bahut bada cool dude, funny samajhte hai ,jo programme ke beech-beech me muh me dono hath rakhkar chillate hai, comments pass karte hai, un logo ne yadi aisa kuchh bhi kiya...to beta, mujhe jaha dikhoge ,wahi par marunga aur langar dance to bilkul hee ban hai...i hate langar dance. Ye aaj ke function ke terms & conditions hai , yadi manzoor ho toh i agree ka button daba kar join kar lo...warna khisak lo....nahi to main baal pakad kar ghaseetate-ghaseetate le jaunga....."
Quote:
"lagta hai, tum logo ne dil pe liya...main to aise hee mazak kar raha tha, dar-asal ye script me tha....aur mujhe kaha gaya tha ki main ekdum tevar me tum log ko dhamkaun....to kaisi lagi meri acting"
Mere mann me aaya ki farewell party wali speech main yaha bhi thok du…lekin phhir jab waha mauzood logo ko dekha toh laga ki rahne deta hoon…waise anchoring se yaad aaya ki kaise Esha farewell ke din mujhse sex karne ko utaru ho gayi thi…kya maal thi..us-se toh main left side se pyar karta tha…sala Gautam…madarchod…..madarchod nahi Maadharchod… thoda vazandar gali…  

“hey bro…”mere college farewell ki yaadon me khatas dalte hue mere hee umra ke ek ladke ne mujhse hath milaya aur mujhse jabarpeli ka gale lagte hue bola 

“bro…mera name Vivek hai…yo…main medical shop chalata hoon…meri dukaan tumne dekhi hogi yahi colony se thodi door me hai...”

“ main faltu ki chizo par dhyan nahi deta”

“yo bro…par meri medical shop se Sanjeevani clinic bhi attached hai…jaha mere bade bhai doctor hai…yo..”

“toh tu mujhe kyun irritate kar raha hai ye sab bata ke…”khisyate hue main bola…

“aisi baat nahi hai bro…”

“dekh be… yadi tune ek aur baar…. Bro…yo bro…kaha toh main wo samne wali beer ki botal lunga aur use tere pichhwade me dalkar…us botal me ek laat kheechkar marunga…tu ja na apna kaam kar…ek toh waise hee mera sar ghoom raha hai…upar se tu apni aisi taisi kara raha hai…”

“bro…tumhara sar ghoom raha hai…”kahkar usne turant apni jeb me hath dala aur ek tablet mujhe dekar bola “isko kha lo…”


Maine ek baar usko upar se neeche dekha aur socha ki iska kya karu…is-se chhutkara kaise paun…iske muh me mukka maar du…ya iske khopdi me apni khopdi de maru ya phhir ise lund fek ke maru….lekin phhir mujhe ek aur raasta soojha aur maine chup chap uski tablet li aur use badi shaleenta ke sath‘excuse me’ bolkar waha se khisak liya…

“sala kya ajeeb chipku tha…bro…yo bro…bolkar dimag ka dhokla bana diya…ek aur minute uske sath rahta toh dimag ki nashe fat jati….kaise-kaise log hai is duniya me…I hate everyone”
.

“Arman……idhar aa”

“ab kaun hai be…”palatkar maine dekha… “ye toh Varun hai…par ye mujhe kyun bula raha hai…”

“aana..champagne beer kholni hai”

“toh khol lena…mujhe kyun bula raha hai…”


Jiske baad Varun ne mujhe ghoor kar dekha aur na chahte hue bhi mujhe waha jaana pada…waha is samay Varun ke paas kuch khas hee log the…baki sab thoda door khade hokar champagne khulne ka intezar kar rahe the…Nisha, Shipra… Sonam ke bagal me khadi thi aur main ,Varun ke bagal me khada tha, mujhe nahi maloom ki kyun par mujhe is samay bahut insult wali feeling aa rahi thi…lekin tabhi waha wo medical shop wala launda aa gaya…jisne thodi der pahle..bro…bro karke mera dimag kha liya tha…

“hey bro…”mujhe kohni markar wo bola

“main teri gand mar lunga yadi tune mujhe dobara touch bhi kiya toh…ya phhir mujhse baat bhi ki toh…lawda, bahut der se bardasht kar raha hoon tujhe…ab yadi tune ek aur shabd bhi bola toh teri gand me danda dalkar 1000 R.P.M. ki speed se danda ghumaunga…”

“Arman ,ye kya bol raha hai tu…”dheere-dheere apna daant peeste hue Varun bola 

“Vivek dost hai mera…tu us-se aise baat nahi kar sakta…”

“toh usko bol ki mujhse baat hee na kare…simple”

“Vivek ,tu abhi chup rah…main baad me tujhse milta hoon…”

“ok…Varun bro…”bolkar Vivek waha se door hat gaya aur Vivek ke waha se jaane ke baad Varun ne Sonam ke sath milkar champagne beer kholi….sale gay
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champagne khulne ke ek ghante ke baad hee waha mauzood har shaks chala gaya tha…siway kuch logo ko chhodkar….jo shayad Sonam…Nisha…Shipra aur David the…shayad isiliye main is waqt flat ke andar nahi balki chhat par daru aur beer ki botal lekar baitha hua tha aur andar chal rahe hasi Mazak se main beech-beech me andaza laga raha tha ki…andar kaun-kaun hai….Chhat par is samay pel ke andhera tha aur kyunki mujhe andhera bahut pasand tha isliye main aksar raat ko daru yahi piya karta tha…jiske karan meri assumption itni strong ho gayi thi ki main andhere me bhi peg bana liya karta tha….

“kya be,Arman…teri koyi izzat-vizzat hai ki nahi…Varun ne itna bada faisla le liya aur tujhe bataya tak nahi…tu kahe toh pel du sale ko…”peg banate hue maine khud se pucha aur peg banane ke baad khud ko jawab dete hue bola… 

“usne bataya tha mujhe…par mujhe yaad hee nahi raha…main toh yahi soch raha tha ki meri naukri lagne ki khushi me party di ja rahi hai…”

“offer ab bhi khula hai…tu kahe toh pel du…”

“rahne de…wo toh main bhi kar sakta hoon…”

“waise ek baat bata…ye David kab se Varun ka itna acha dost ban gaya…jo ab tak tere flat me ruka hua hai…kahi Varun aur David gay toh nahi hai…jaise tu aur Arun the…”

“tu in logo ki tulna Arun se kar raha hai…? ”

“sorry...3.0 , Arun was classy…lekin tujhe kya hua..tere samne David , Nisha se ishq ladata hai..dinner me bulakar teri insult karta hai…matlab insult karne ki koshish karta hai aur tu sirf use jaane deta hai…kaha gaya wo Arman…jisne jo hoga dekha jayega bolkar collector ke launde tak ko pel diya tha…ye jante hue bhi ki phhir baad me uski pelayi hogi…kaha gaya wo Arman…jisne Gautam ko hostel me patak-patak ke kutto ki tarah choda tha…ye jante hue bhi ki Gautam shahar ke sabse bade gunde ka beta tha… tu thoda soch aur phhir mujhe jawab de ki kya ab tujhe khud par sharam nahi aati ki tu kya tha aur ab kya ban gaya hai…”

“wo…wo main nahi tha…matlab main tha..lekin ab main wo nahi raha…pichhale ek saal ne mujhe bahut badal diya hai…tum toh lawda kand karke nikal liye…jhelna mujhe pada…wo toh bhala ho ki mujhe Physics me interest tha,isliye main in sabse nikal gaya…warna main aaj khud suicide kar chuka hota…maine pichhale ek saal me physics ki kayi books padhi…physics ke siddhanto ko apne life ke sath interpetate kiya…tab main samjha ki Physics se bada is duniya me koyi nahi….i mean the deeper you go, the deeper it becomes. aur rahi baat meri toh maine wo zindagi jee hai jiske bare me tu soch bhi nahi sakta… tune toh pel ke ayyashi mari aur chala gaya lekin uska anjaam mujhe jhelna pada ”

“main chala gaya…? Main ab bhi yahi hoon..aur tu kahe toh tujhe iska proof bhi dikha sakta hoon…”

“dikha proof…”

“phhir kamar kas le bidu…par starting tu karna…baki main sambhal lunga…toh chale..”

“chal…”bolkar maine aakhiri peg mara aur hilte-dulte hue khada hua….

“chalo phhir…aaj in sabki pond marte hai…”

Pahle toh maine socha ki normal tarike se normal raaste se yaani ki seehiyo se neeche jaun…lekin phhir maine plan badal diya aur chhat se latak kar seedhe balcony me kooda..jiske karan waha bahut tez aawaz hui aur room me mauzood har ek shaks us aawaz se thodi der ke liye kanp gaya…lekin jab un logo ne mujhe dekha toh hasne lage…

“jyada pee li hai kya be…”mere balcony me koodne ke baad David ne mujhse kaha…

“sorry…David Sir…”


Iske baad maine kuch nahi kaha aur chup chap wahi unke paas me jakar baith gaya…maine waha baithe har ek shaks ka co-ordinate apne dimag me set kiya …Sonam as expected…Varun ka hath pakad kar baithi hui thi aur Nisha ,David ke bagal me thi…baki sab toh shant the lekin David politics ke bare me apna gyan chod raha tha…jaise ki 1947 ke pahle kya-kya hua tha…aur isi dauran wo Gandhi ji ki pelam-pel burayi karne laga…jiske baad main waha se utha aur fridge me se ek beer nikal kar wapas waha aaya jaha sablog baithe hue the….maine muh se beer ka dhakkan khola aur dhakkan seedhe David ke ke upar muh se hee fek diya….jiske baad waha mauzood sabhi log mujhe ghoor kar dekhne lage…yaha tak ki Varun aur Nisha bhi….lekin maine un sabko ignore kiya aur wahi khade hokar beer peene lag gaya aur phhir beer ka ek ghoot muh me bharkar Varun ke upar pichkari marte hue bola….

“tum jaise log jo Gandhi ji ki burayi karte hai, wo char kaudi ke log hote hai aur do kaudi ki baate karte hai…tujhe pata bhi hai ki tu kiski burayi kar raha hai…Mahatma Gandhi ki…mana ki unse kuch galtiya hui…lekin wo toh sabhi se hoti hai…Gandhi ji ko aur unke motives ko samjho… na ki is Shipra ki tarah ratta maro…sale, Madarchodo…”

“teri himmat kaise hui…mujh par thookne ki…you motherfucker”aakrosh me aakar khada hote hue David cheekha aur jaise hee wo khada hua maine beer ki botal uske sar me fod di….

“neeche baith…Maaadharchod….bahut din se tujhe dekh raha hoon,lawda… main kuch bolta nahi iska matlab ye nahi ki main kuch janta nahi…kyunki main kuch bolne ke bajay kuch karne me yakin rakhta hoon ”ye kahkar maine ek mukka kaskar David ke pet me mara, jiske baad wo apna pet pakad kar wahi baith gaya….aur dard se rone laga….

Ye David ka haal tha…lekin waha mauzood baki logo ka haal David se bhi bura ho chala tha…Shipra toh dar ke mare Nisha ke peeche chhup gayi thi…baki bache teen log…Varun ,Sonam aur Nisha…wo is waqt mujhse dar bhi rahe the aur mujhe ghoor bhi rahe the…

“Armaaaaann…what the hell is this…”mujhe jor se dhakka dekar Nisha cheekhi…

“main soch hee raha tha ki ab kiska number lagau…par tune mera kaam aasan kar diya…”Nisha ki taraf badhte hue main muskuraya…lekin main Nisha ke aur karib jata…uske pahle hee Varun ne mujhe pakad liya….

“Arman…tu is waqt hosh me nahi hai…tu chal mere sath…aur Sonam tum David ko sambhalo…uske sar se khoon nikal raha hai…”

“Sonam, yadi tune David ko chhua bhi toh main na teri gand maar dunga…salo Shri Arman ki bezzati karte ho…aaj tumlog ko apna real version dikhata hoon…Varun tu hat be..”

“Arman…Sonam meri girlfriend hai…tu us-se aise baat nahi kar sakta”

“teri girlfriend hai toh kya…tu us-se mere sar me mootwayega…Sonam ko chhod yadi tune bhi David ki koyi help ki toh main tere sath bhi wahi karunga…”

“Nisha…wo us almirah me first aid ka box hai…tum David ki help karo…main Arman ko sambhalta hoon….”bolkar Varun ne mujhe peeche se pakda aur pakad kar waha se door le jaane laga…

“tu mujhe sambhalega…chhod mujhe…abey chhod…teri toh…chhod de, main bol raha hoon ki mujhe chhod de…ye sala…Varun me mujhse jyada dum kabse aa gaya…main khud ko chhuda hee nahi pa raha…”khud ko Varun ke changul se chhudane ki koshish karte hue main badbadaya…

Isi beech Nisha almirah se first aid ka box nikal layi aur dard se karahte David ke paas pahuchi…

“iski maa ka…Varun chhod mujhe… aaj is rakhail ko bhi thik karta hoon.. bahut dimag khati hai ye… BC ne pagal kar diya hai ye puchh-puchh ke ki main kaisi dikh rahi hoon… meri dress kaisi hai… mera hairband kaisa hai… meri sandel kaisi hai.… phhir mujhe apne aur David ki kahani sunayegi… mere same kisi aur ki taarif karegi… yadi itna hee pasand hai tujhe David toh ,ja usi ka lund le le… phhir mere paas kyun aati hai… Sali rakhail aur Varun, tu mujhe chhodega ki nahi be”

“Arman…nahi…tu pagal ho gaya hai abhi…”

“abhi toh main thik hua hoon…tu mujhe chhodega ya nahi”

“nahi…”

“le phhir…”

Maine apna sharir aage ki taraf karke kisi spring ke mafiq pel ke potential energy store ki aur phhir puri taqat jhok di Varun ko peeche dhakelne me…jiska nateeza ye hua ki hum dono ki peechhe deewar se jordar takkar hui…Varun ke aage rahne ke karan main toh phhir bhi thik tha…lekin Varun…uska sar peeche ki deewar se ja takraya aur wo bhi David ki tarah dharashahi ho gaya….jiske baad main utha aur Varun ke sar se khoon nikalta dekh bola…

“yahi hota hai Sher aur uske shikar ke beech me ungali karne se…ab pada rah aise hee… 8th Semester ki puri kahani sunne ke baad bhi tu mere beech me aaya…tune kya socha tha ki Arman teri baat maan jayega… sale aukat me rah aur bhool mat ki kya haisiyat thi teri mere saamne…bosdiwale ”

“tumhari himmat kaise hui…”tarrate hue Sonam mere paas aayi aur mujhe marne ke liye apna hath uthane hee wali thi ki maine uska hath pakda aur uthakar Varun ki taraf fek diya….

“ab ye mujhe chodna sikhayenge… Friendynamic ke law ne mere hath baandh rakhe hai warna main tujhe achchhe se batata ki meri himmat kaise hui… randi Sali… paise lekar lund choosne wali… tujhse toh main baad me niptunga.. tu rook do minute abhi”

Sonam ko fekne ke baad maine flat ka room andar se lock karke chabhi apne jeb me dal li aur sabka mobile chheenkar balcony me fek diya .yaha tak ki apna bhi…pata nahi kyun par maine apna mobile bhi balcony me fek diya. Shayad flow-flow me fek diya hoga…anyway uske baad maine balcony ke gate ko bhi lock kiya aur chabhi apne jeb me dal li….yani ki ab mere kaand karne ki ideal situations thi . bole toh no external disturbance….mere bistar par apna pet pakad kar rote hue David ka maine pair pakda aur ghaseet kar neeche patak diya aur ek laat use marte hue bola

“kaise be…ab bol…”

“sorry bhai…”hath jodkar vinti karte hue David mere samne gidgidane laga

“kya sorry be…lawde” ek aur laat use pelte hue maine kaha

“sorry…bhai…galti ho gayi mujhse…”

“kyun hoon main itna dayawan…”David ko continueosly marte hue maine kaha “mahan…hone ka… yahi…ek….nuksan…hai… ki main… logo ko… jaan se…nahi… maar pata”
.

David ko bharpet marne ke baad maine use wahi chhoda aur Nisha ki taraf badha aur sabse pahle uska baal pakad kar jabaran uske honth par kiss kiya aur phhir bola….

“tum ladkiya jitni bholi ban-ne ka natak karti ho utni tum hoti nahi….tujhe kya lagta hai ki mujhe tere bare me kuch nahi maloom…tujh jaisi ladkiya kisi ek ki nahi ho sakti…college me tune kisi aur se marwayi ,phhir mujhse aur ab David se….”

“David sirf mera dost hai…”ruwasi hokar cheekhte hue Nisha boli….

“yahi bol-bol kar tum ladkiyo ne 90 % laundo ko chutiya bana rakha hai…tu toh mujhse baat karne ke layak hee nahi hai…isliye main tujhse toh baat hee nahi karunga….Sonam…tu kidhar hai... Sali chhinar… paise lekar lund chusne wali..”

“Arman tu use kuch nahi bolega…warna ab main bhi shant nahi rahunga… ”deewar ke sahare khade hokar Varun ne kaha 

“ Sonam tu wahi ladki hai na…jo paiso ke liye blow job deti hai…tujhe kya lagta hai ki mujhe tere bare me kuch nahi maloom”

“tu ye kya bol raha hai Arman…”

“mujhe chutiya mat bana Varun…maine Sonam ko tujhse bolte hue suna hai ki yadi tu use diamond ring gift karega toh wo tujhe blow job degi…yani ki tera lawda chusegi… Varun, call recordings could be noxious or even deadly. ” 

Ek minute….ye maine kaha…kya sach me maine aisa kaha….ya ye sirf mera vaham hai ki maine aisa kaha….kya ho yadi main kuch der baad khud ko kahi sota hua paun…ya phhir ye bhi toh ho sakta hai ki main ab bhi apne flat ki chhat par baitha daru pee raha hoon aur jyada peene ke karan maine ye story apne aap bana li ho…?kyunki fake story banana me main mahir hoon. Kahi aisa toh nahi ki main koyi sapna dekh raha hoon ya phhir Sharda Vihar ki chair par baithkar main time travel kar raha hoon…afterall maine past toh kayi baar ghoom liya hai aur yadi brain ke through past me jaana possible hai toh phhir future me kyun nahi…..? par yaha ek sawal ya phhir kahe ki sabse aham sawal jo mere saamne aata hai wo ye ki kahi 8th Semester ki jo kahani maine Varun ko sunayi thi yadi uska koyi wazood hee na ho toh ? kya ho agar main kabhi college gaya hee na hoon toh ? kahi mujhpar koyi experiment toh nahi chal raha…..
Yani ki kayi sambhavnaye…mere dimag ko jodti hai un sabhi ghatnao se jo sach bhi ho sakti hai aur jhooth bhi…aur ab mujhe ek baar phhir se yahi lagne laga tha jaise ki mera present mera past hai aur past….future…..confused ? well me too baby…but I’m enjoying it now . because it’s better to enjoy rather than be confused all the time.
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“tumne mujhe samajh kya rakha hai….you son of a bitch…”

ek bahut tez aawaz ne mujhe present me wapas la patka…ya kahe past me ya phhir future me….par us aawaz ne mujhe wahi la patka jaha se maine scene ko adhoora chhoda tha…yani ki Nisha…Sonam…Shipra….Varun…..David aur main ab bhi ek kamre me band the jiski chabhi mere jeb me thi…… 

“tumne mujhe samajh kya rakha hai….you son of a bitch…”wo ladki phhir se cheekhi aur abki baar itna jor se cheekhi ki mere andar mauzood har ek chiz kanp uthi… mera dil, mera dimag, mere hath-pair… kidney…liver… , mera lund . sab kuch… sab kuch matlab sab kuch.

“ye BC itna kyun cheekh rahi hai…kya isne mujhe bahra samajh rakha hai…oh sorry…yaad aaya ye toh gusse se cheekh rahi hai…”

“tumhara name Sonam hai na ? jo diamonds ke badle blow job deti hai…”

“Arman bahut ho gaya ab…”mere paas aakar mera collar pakad kar Varun ne kaha… “mere ahsaan mat bhool…mat bhool ki pichhale ek saal se jo tu ye ayyashi kar raha hai na…wo sab meri badaulat hee kar raha hai…bhool mat ki yadi main nahi hota toh tu kahi bheekh mang raha hota … meri achchhayi ne mujhe namra rahna sikhaya hai lekin iska matlab ye nahi ki main tujhe koyi jawab nahi de sakta…”

“collar se hath hata be…”Varun ko ek mukka markar door dhakelte hue maine kaha“kaun se ahsaan be…tu pichhale ek saal se mujh par koyi ahsaan nahi kar raha tha…balki mere ahsaan ko utar raha tha…bhool gaya kaise School life me mathematics ke har dusare sawal me teri fat jati thi…jiski baad tu mere paas bhag kar aa jata tha…bhool gaya…kaise meri vazah se Reema tujhse pati thi aur ye sab ko chhod bhi diya jaye….toh yaad dila du ki jab teri behan tere dost ke sath tere ghar me pakdi gayi thi tab maine yani ki Shri Arman ne pure school ke saamne us launde ko mara tha aur phhir pure school ke saamne main maar bhi khaya tha….chal le de ke is mamle ko bhi hata…lekin us ahsaan ke bare me tu kya bolega jo maine tujh par nahi balki tere pure khandan par kiya tha…”

“kaun sa ahsaan…” 

“kaun sa ahsaan ? ek minute…”David ke paas jaakar maine ek jhapad David ko mara aur us-se puchha “yaad dila be…kaun sa ahsaan”

“mujhe kaise maloom hoga…”chillate hue David ne turant jawab diya

“Shri Arman se tez aawaz me baat karta hai…teri toh…”ek aur mukka David ke pet me marte hue main peeche palta aur Varun ko dekhkar kaha “wo ahsaan..jab tera bhai tum logo se tang aakar suicide karne chala tha…tab use kisne bachaya tha…bhool gaya kya ? abey maine jitney ahsaan tujh par kiye hai uska yadi main 10 % bhi kisi aur par karta toh wo zindagi bhar mera lund dhokar peeta …aur tu toh mera dost tha…mera khas dost… par tune toh Sonam ke chakkar me mera collar pakad liya… mujhe tum sabse nafrat hai… bosdiwalo… tum sabse ”


Bolte hue main ruka aur phhir jeb se room ki chabhi nikal kar gate khola…main ab samajh gaya tha ki aaj yaha jo kuch bhi hua hai uske baad Varun mere sath nahi rahega…Varun kya nahi rahega…main khud uske sath nahi rahunga.i…i…just hate everyone…maine almirah se apna bag nikala jo ki maine pahle se pack karke rakha hua tha aur waha se jaane laga….

“Arman…toh ye sab tune pahle se plan karke rakha tha…ye sab kuch…isiliye tune apna bag pahle se pack karke rakha tha…main toh ab tak yahi soch raha tha ki ye sab kuch jo yaha ho raha hai , jo tu kar raha hai….wo sab kuch tere jyada sharab peene ki vazah se ho raha hai….”

“aur nahi toh kya…tum logo ne mujhe daru peekar bhokne wala kutta samajh rakha hai kya…tum log mere baare me jo sochte ho wo toh sirf meri beginning hai… meri ending ka toh tum log andaza tak nahi laga sakte… main Physics ki tarah hoon… The Greatest… The Biggest… and The Deepest ”kandhe me bag taangte hue main bola “ Remember Varun…maine kya kaha tha ki…mere sorry bolne ka matlab ye nahi hota ki main apne kiye par sharminda hoon... balki iska matlab ye hota hai ki main tumhe aur bhi sharminda karunga….ye jante hue bhi tune mujhse Sonam ko sorry bulwaya…galti meri nahi thi…galti actual me tum sab ki thi jo mere muh se sorry sunne ke liye itne betaab the…Goodbye and take care……lawdo ” 

“par tu jayega kaha….”

“itni fikar hoti toh mujhe apne ahsaan nahi ginata tu aur na hee is do take ki ladki ke chakkar me mera collar pakadta…ab jab sab preplanned hai toh rahne ka bhi kahi jugad kiya hoga maine…bas abhi mujhe yaad nahi hai…lekin jab yaad karunga toh yaad aa jayega…
Aasmano ke falaq par kuch rang aaj bhi baki hai….waisich apun ke dil ke bhi kuch Armaan baki hai…sorry it’s A-R-M-A-N…. jo main pure karne ja raha hoon ”
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Itna bolkar main waha se chal diya…Kitna acha hota yadi ye sab nahi hua hota toh…yani ki yadi Nisha mere sath raat me bahar jaane ke liye taiyar ho jati ya phhir Varun party me David ko invite nahi karta toh mujhe nahi lagta ki ye sab kuch hota…ya phhir main chhat par jakar daru ke dhada-dhad peg nahi marta toh na hee main khud se baat karta aur na hee khud ko jo kuch bhi hua,wo sab karne ke liye motivate karta. Lekin ye hua tha aur bahut jor-shor se hua tha…lekin is waqt main problem ye nahi thi…is waqt jo main problem thi wo ye ki main itni raat me jaun kaha...? waha toh bahut akad kar kuch bhi bol diya lekin…mujhe jaana kaha hai…

“mera bag pahle se aise pack tha…jaise meri kahi jaane ki planning ho…Varun ne sahi kaha tha ki wo sab kuch jo maine thodi dere pahle kiya tha…wo sab mera plan tha…na ki mera daru peekar bahak jaana …yani ki jo kuch bhi aaj thodi der pahle hua…wo hona hee tha…par jab ye mera plan tha toh maine kahi toh raat guzarne ka intezaam kiya hoga…kisi hotel me..? ya kisi ke dost ke yaha ? ya kisi dharamshala me ?”

Ye janne ke liye maine apne sare jeb check kiye ki kahi se koyi receipt mil jaye…lekin mujhe kuch nahi mila….phhir maine mobile me sms check kiya ki shayad kahi online booking karwayi hogi aur uska sms aaya hoga…lekin kisi booking ya transaction ka koyi sms bhi nahi tha… maine apne mobile me call history check ki lekin sabhi calls ek line se Nisha ke the.

“ab Gajini ke mafiq camera rakhna shuru kar de…lawda kuch yaad-vaad toh rahta nahi…” colony se bahar aakar sadak par chalte hue maine kaha “ab toh itni raat me yaha se city ke liye koyi auto bhi nahi milega…aur maro beta dialogues…kitna acha dost tha…kitni achi maal thi…free me khana…free me choot…free me wifi…upar se transport ki bhi facility…aur badle me kya karna tha ? kuch nahi karna tha…lekin nahi…tu toh Shri Krishna ji ka bahut bada fan hai… aur bina karm kiye rah hee nahi sakta….”

“aisi baat nahi hai…un sabko sabak sikhana tha ki jab main apne pe aata hoon toh kya karta hoon…”

“very good…aur tune dikha bhi diya…kya tune apne zindagi se kuch nahi sikha ? aur kitne jhatke tujhe chahiye serious banane ke liye…maine toh socha tha ki college khatm hone ke baad tu ekdum serious ho jayega…”

“yahi meri quality hai be…ki mere sath kitna bhi kuch ho jaye…ek-do mahine ke baad main normal jata hoon aur jisme meri ek philosophy bahut help karti hai…”

“kaun si philosophy”

“yahi ki is duniya me jo bhi chiz buri lage uska Mazak udana shuru kar do… jis-se wo chiz thoda kam bura lagti hai aur kuch samay ke baad ek bhi nahi…jaise ki jab Esha ne mujhe chhoda toh us-se paar paane ke liye main subah sham khana khan eke baad khud se kahta tha ki… ye sahi hua… mere sath aisa hee hona chahiye tha. Main gandu hoon… maha baklund hoon… chutiya hoon. Gali me bhagta hua ek awara kutta hoon. Phhir main berojgar hua aur tab bhi maine aisa hee kiya…ki lawda maine college me ayyashi ki…main bahut bada chodu hai…lavde ka baal hoon… mujhe toh kahi jhadu marne ki bhi naukri nahi milegi etc.etc. ”

“ abey, tu khud ko motivate kar raha tha ya phhir demoralize kar raha tha…?  By the way…toh kya ab tu Esha ke bare me sochkar kabhi udas nahi hota…? Ya Aradhna ke bare me sochkar ? ya phhir Sidar ke bare me sochkar ? kya tujhe bilkul bhi bura nahi lagta ki college me tune sirf apne ego ke karan basketball ka ek bhi match nahi khela…? Jab ki Gautam ke aalawa tere jaisa basketball koyi khel hee nahi sakta tha…”

“hamesha nahi par kabhi-kabhi sochta hoon… thoda bura bhi lagta hai, lekin phhir sochta hoon ki… ok… jo hua so hua…now move on….lekin aksar mere mann me ye khayal bhi aata hai ki…Arman…chal chalkar un sabki *** chod dalte hai… par main dono me se kuch nahi karta… matlab naa hee main unhe bhoolkar aage badhta hoon aur na hee wapas jakar unki bajata hoon…main toh unse milo door yaha Nagpur me baitha mutth maar raha hoon…. “

“toh iska matlab ye hua ki teri philosophy ka exception tu khud hai…”

“ as always… Actually main kahna ye chahta hoon ki mujhe abhi bilkul nahi pata ki main kya kah raha hoon… kya bol raha hoon. mera abhi just break up hua hai… maine apne bachpan ke dost ko khoya hai. Isliye main abhi thoda udas hoon ya phhir khush hoon ? mujhe thik se kuch feel nahi ho raha… zara mere pupil (black portion of eye) me dekh kar bata toh wo expand ho rahi hai ya shrink… yadi mere pupils expand hue toh main excited hoon aur yadi shrink hue toh main udas hoon… ”

“lawda ,kuch dhang se nahi dikh raha…”
.

Yahi sab sochte-vicharte main bag taangkar chup-chap raat ke ek baje NH-6 me chale ja raha tha ki pata nahi do log kaha se achanak tapak pade aur mujhe chaku dikhakar wahi rok liya…ek mere saamne khada hua aur ek mere peeche…

“chal be samaan neeche rakh…” mere peeche khade shaks ne gurrate hue mujhse kaha…

“samman… samman kaise neeche rakhte hai… ab kya lund ukhadkar neeche rakh du..”

“samman nahi be… samaan. Apna bag neeche rakh”

“chal be..lavde…abhi lund fek kar marunga toh pura khandan chud jayega…”kahte hue maine un dono me se ek ko jo mere samne khada tha use dhakka diya aur NH-6 me apna safar continue kiya…lekin tabhi unme se ek ne mere kandhe par tanga bag pakad kar peeche kheecha…jiska karan main wahi peeche ki taraf ulta gir gaya….

Mere neeche girne ke baad un dono me se ek mere chhati par baitha aur mere garden me chaku rakhkar bola…

“tujhe pata bhi hai ki NH-6 me kitne murder…rape…loot hoti hai… hume khud nahi maloom ki humne kitni baar logo ko loota hai… isliye chup-chap apna bag rakh aur chalta ban….”

“pahli baat…mujhe darr nahi lag raha… dusari baat yadi tum dono mera bag lootne me kamyab bhi hue… jo ki hoge nahi… toh bhi tum log itna bhari bag lekar kaha tak bhagoge aur teesari baat tum dono apna kitna bhi jor laga lo, main tum dono ko pel dunga… bosdiwalo, apne aap ko kabhi aaine me dekha hai…ek fook marunga toh tum dono ki haddiya tak toot jayegi…chal hat…”bolkar maine apne upar baithe us patle-duble insaan ke peeth me jordar mukka mara aur wo apna peeth pakadkar wahi side me let gaya….

Apni sathi ki haalat dekhkar dusara wala bhi aaya lekin usne mujhse ladayi nahi ki balki mujhse maafi mangte hue apne sathi ki madad karne laga…..

“bhaiya humko chhod do…hum log bahut garib hai…”

“toh ? garib ho toh kya logo ki gand hee mar logo ? khair mujhe isase kya… looto.. maaro… maro…ma chudao… lekin… lekin…tum logo ne mujhpar par hamla kiya hai… isliye aise toh chhodunga nahi…waise bhi mere fans aajkal mujhpe shaq karne lage hai… toh kya kiya jaye tum dono ke sath…police ke hawale kar du kya”

“bhaiyo chaho toh humari gand mar lo…lekin police ke hawale mat karna…”dono rote hue ek sath bole…

“chal khol…”

“kya…  ”

“khol na…”

“aisa na karo bhaiya…hum log bahut jyada garib hai…”

“tum dono itne jyada garib ho ki tum logo ke paas gand hee nahi hai…. muh se hagte ho kya be…”

“humko maaf kar do…”

“tum dono ke jeb me jo-jo hai… wo sab kuch nikal kar mujhe do…”

“kya…”

“ek aur baar…kya bola toh... seedhe thane le jaunga”ek-ek jhapad un dono ko markar maine kaha….jiske baad wo dono mere hath-pair jodne lage aur rote-rote unke jeb me jo-jo tha nikal kar mujhe dene laga….

“kya be chindi choro… sirf dhayi hazar…chal koyi nahi daru ka kharcha nikal gaya…”
Hath me dhayi hazar pakad kar main utha lekin mujhe tabhi yaad aaya ki dushman ko kabhi peeth nahi dikhana chahiye aur tab toh bilkul nahi jab wo puri tarah gusse me ho aur unke paas chaku ho… isliye main turant peeche palta aur dekha ki unme se ek meri peeth par chaku khopne ki taiyari kar raha tha. 

“teri maa ka…sale mujhe chaku marne ke jugad me tha…”

apna bag peeche se samne rotate karke maine bag us chor ki hath me de mara jisase uska hath toh mujhse door ho gaya lekin chaku ab bhi uski hath me tha…usne chaku bahut kaskar pakad rakha tha…isliye maine aav na dekha taav aur apna bhari bharkam bag uthakar seedhe uske upar fek diya... is ummid se ki mere bag me rakha mera laptop sahi salamt rahega…maine uske upar bag feka aur wo wahi peeche mere bag ke sath neeche gir gaya… jiske baad maine wahi paas khade dusare wale ke sar ka baal pakda, jo khali hath wahi khada tha aur uske pet me do-teen mukka kas kar mar diya jisase wo apne aap wahi baith gaya…..

“kyun be tum dono chaku se marne wale the mujhe…”

“haan toh ,humara paisa lekar kyun bhag raha tha tu…”jise maine bag fek kar mara tha wo zameen me pade-pade hee khisiyate hue bola…

“ sun be burchatte…khair chhod…tum dono apna chor pocket dikhao toh…”neeche baithkar maine kaha

“nahi…”

“aise kaise nahi ”bolte hue maine zameen me pada chaku uthaya aur seedhe uske hatheli ke beecho-beech ghusa diya.…jispar wo bahut jor se cheekha par uska dusara sathi use bachane ke liye aage nahi aaya…wo jaha tha wahi par bina kisi movements ke apne sathi ki hatheli ki taraf dekhta raha . Wo mujhe is samay dara hua kam balki hairan jyada lag raha tha , main khud bhi apni is harqat se hairan tha par jiske hath me maine abhi-abhi chaku khopa tha wo bilkul bhi hairan nahi tha.wo toh lagatar chillaye ja raha tha… uski cheekhne ki aawaz itni tez thi ki mujhe uske dusare hath se uska hee muh dabana pad gaya…. Taaki uske cheekhne ki aawaz sunkar koyi use bachane na aa jaye

“chillata kyun hai be…mujhse adhik tujhe maloom hai ki is samay yaha koyi madad ke liye nahi aane wala…” maine uske hath me ghusa hua chaku nikala aur nishana lagakar chaku phhir se usi jagah wapas ghop diya…. “chal chilla…”

Wo abki baar aur jor se chillaya aur uske chillane ka asar hee tha ki uske sathi ne jise maine do-teen mukka markar baitha diya tha…usne apne chor pocket se nikal kar apna pura maal mere samne rakh diya….jise dekh kar meri aankhe chamak gayi….kyunki uske jeb me hazar ke note ki ek gaddi bhi thi….

“shabash…ab apne dost ke andar wale jeb se maal nikal….”

“nahi…ye humare mohalle ka dada hai…yadi maine iski jeb se sona-chandi nikal kar diya toh toh ye mujhe baad me bahut marega”

“ye toh tujhe baad me bas marega… lekin main… main toh teri maa hee chod dunga…chal jaldi se iski bhi jeb khali kar , warna iske toh hath me chaku mara hai tere toh main seedhe gardan me chaku ghusaunga ”

Jiske baad usne apne sathi ki jeb me hath dala aur jo kuch bhi uski jeb me tha nikal kar mujhe diya aur maine gaur kiya ki hum dono ke hath kanp rahe the… jo is baat ka sabot tha ki hum dono hee is kaam me nausikhiye the. abki baar meri aankh aur bhi chamki kyunki uske jeb me sone-chadi ki kayi chains, bracelets aur ek-do angoothi bhi thi….maine wo sab saman apne bag me bhara aur hazar ke note ki gaddi jaise wallet me dalne laga waise hee mujhe apne wallet me mujhe yellow colour ki ek receipt dikhayi di…

“Name-Shri Arman
Flat No. E-6….
Date- 25-09-2016”

“oh BC…ye maine kab book kiya ? acha tabhi main Nisha ko baar-baar ye bol raha tha ki chal party se chalte hai ,maine ek flat book kar rakha hai… wow,aaj toh main khud ka fan ho gaya hoon…pata nahi aage kya-kya hoga…”
.

NH-6 se main wapas colony ki taraf chal pada aur gate ke paas aakar apna bag zameen par rakhkar bag me E-6 flat ki chabhi dhoondhane laga…kyunki jab maine flat book kiya hai toh zaroor chabhi bhi mere paas hee hogi…aisa maine socha aur meri ye soch ek dum sahi sabit hui kyunki mere bag ke side wale pocket me ek chabhi thi…..

“yahich hogi…mere flat ki chabhi…kya number hai mere flat ka…E-6 ya E-5…. E- 6 hoga… E-5 to us Randi Vandana(R.Vandana) ka flat hai shayad…ab maza aayega…jab main har roj nangi-nangi photos uske ghar me fekunga.Vandana Rathi...hold your choot… Shri Arman is cumming…. ”

Maine receipt me dekha flat ka no. E-6 tha. Maine wo sabhi paise aur jewellery bag me ekdum neeche dali jo maine choro se chori ki thi aur chup-chap apne flat me chala gaya….
.
Subah uthkar maine adat anusar sabse pahle apna mobile uthaya aur bistar par pade-pade gaana sunne laga ki tabhi mere mobile me ek messege aaya….messege Nisha ne kiya tha isliye main ye janne ke liye bahut utsuk ho utha ki Nisha ne kya likha hoga….

“mujhse tumse bas aakhiri baar milna hai…sham ko 5 baje park me aa jana…”
“kamal hai…itna sab kuch karne ke baad bhi ? ye mujhse milna chahti hai…ab kya kahna hai ise…kahi ye in sabka koyi plan toh nahi ki mujhe park me bulwakar marwa dale…. Waise bhi aaj ki date me kisi ka kya bharosa ? nahi jaunga ,faltu me kahi lene ke dene pad gaye toh…? Waise bhi main kyun milu kisi aisi ladki se jo mere layak hee nahi hai…”

Maine apna mobile ek taraf feka aur kal raat ki robbery me meri jitni kamayi hui thi usko check karne laga….

“shuru me usne dhayi hazar diye…phhir hazar-hazar ki ek gaddi mujhe di…jisme 20 hazar the. mere account me abhi 22 hazar hai…upar se jo ye sona-chandi hai…kam se kam 60-70 hazar ka maal hoga lekin black me bechunga…isliye 40-45 se jyada nahi milega…yani ki abhi mere paas 80k ke lagbhag rupaye hai….itne me toh aish karunga main….waise bhi mujhe ab naukri ki zaroorat nahi…jab bhi paiso ki zaroorat hogi main NH-6 me robbery karne nikal jaunga…. acha idea diya hai un chutiyo ne…. phhir log mujhe kahenge ki….Shri Arman : The Criminal of NH-6 ya phhir The Robber of NH-6…ya phhir Pirates of the NH-6….NH-6 ke lootere…  sounds cool… par pahle is flat ko rahne layak banata hoon” 

.
Maine pura din laga diya apne flat ko arrange karne me… jaise ki main daru ki botal kaha rakhunga , kaha baithkar daru piyunga…apne flat ke kis room me baithkar apni criminal activities ke plan banaunga…vagerah-vagerah aur sham hote-hote tak sari arrangeent karne ke baad jab main naha dhokar bathroom se nikla toh 6 baj chuke the...maine apna mobile uthaya aur dominos wale ko order diya ki do large pizza wo fatafat le aaye… pizza order karne ke baad maine apna mobile wapas bistar me ek taraf fek diya aur full taiyar hokar park ki taraf chala…waise toh mujhe Nisha ne 5 baje bulaya tha lekin mujhe maloom tha ki wo mera intezaar zaroor karegi…isiliye main bade aaram se park ki taraf ja raha tha…

“hi….”mujhe dekhkar Nisha ne kaha…

“hi…sorry main thoda late ho gaya….”Nisha ke bagal me baithkar main bola “toh kaha hai…baki ke log”

“baki ke log…kaun…”

“wahi David aur uske gunde… “aas-paas dekhte hue main bola… “kamal hai,mujhe door-door tak na toh David dikh raha hai aur na hee koyi aisa jispar mujhe shaq ho ki wo mujhe marne aaya ho…”

“mere aalawa yaha koyi nahi hai…Arman…”

“mujhe laga ki tum logo ka mujhe marne ka plan hoga…lekin jab tum logo ka aisa koyi plan hee nahi hai toh phhir mujhe yaha kyun bulaya…”

“kyunki main tumse ye kahna chahati thi ki main tumse pyar karti hoon aur hamesha karti rahungi…par ab main aur bardasht nahi kar sakti…main tumhe bhool nahi sakti…par ab aur tumhare sath nahi rah sakti…tum jab mujhe pahli baar mile the tab tum mere liye ek mystery the aur aaj jab main tumse aakhiri baar mil rahi hoon…tab bhi tum mere liye ek mystery hee ho …mujhe nahi pata ki tumne kal raat wo sab kyun kiya aur na hee main tumhe kuch kahungi…infact maine tumse kal raat ek bahut achi chiz seekhi hai ki sirf apne bare me socho…sirf khud se pyar karo… sirf apne ahankar me jiyo… kya kahte hai ise…”

“may be Narcissism…” 

“I don’t know and I don’t care….isiliye maine ye decision liya hai ki aaj ke baad humara ye rishta yahi par khatm ho jayega….Remember Arman, jab tum mujhe pahle baar Eternity me mile the… hum dono ek-dusre se takraye the…aam taur par log ek-dusare se sorry bolte hai aur maine bola bhi tha lekin tumne mujhe sorry nahi bola…ulta mujhe hadka diya ki main tumhe line maar rahi hoon… uske baad humari mulaqat yahi isi park me hui…Arman…tumhe main bata nahi sakti ki main tumhe kitna pyar karti hoon…main tumhe kabhi bhool nahi paungi aur na hee bhoolna chahti hoon… kyunki meri life ka sabse acha samay tumhare sath beeta…toh kya hua yadi ab tum mujhse thik se pesh nahi aate…toh kya hua ki tumne meri bahut insult ki…actual me tum aise nahi ho…maine gaur kiya hai ki ye tumhari sachchayi nahi hai…tumne apne aap ko kahi chhupa rakha hai…aur main aaj tak isi ummid me thi ki ek din main tumhare us chhipe hue Arman ko bahar le aaungi….lekin main isme kamyab nahi hui aur yahi meri nakamyabi thi…galti meri thi…tum toh hamesha se aise the…tumne mujhe pahle bhi kaha tha ki samay ke sath tumhara bartaav kharab ho jayega…lekin main hee bewkoof thi jo har baar tumse baat karne pahuch jati thi… shayad main tumhare layak hee nahi aur aaj ke baad hum kabhi nahi milenge. Please… aaj ke baad mujhse milne ki koshish mat karna ”itna bolkar Nisha uthi aur waha se jaane lagi…..

“ayusman bhava…”apni aankh mijte hue maine kaha “and don’t worry… mujhme kisi ko manane ka feature bhagwan ne diya hee nahi hai… isliye befikar raho, main sapne me bhi tumse sorry nahi bolunga ya manane aaunga , reality me toh bahut door ki baat hai. Afterall I’m a Narcissist  ”

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Chapter-14 : Relative Motion(Present≈Past)

“mujhe call mat karna ab aur na hee koyi sms chahiye mujhe…”cheekh kar maine kaha 

“I won’t…aur maine apna number change kar diya hai…isliye tum bhi mujhe call ya sms mat karna…”

“toh tum us David ke liye mujhe chhodkar ja rahi ho…”

“David ka toh yaha sawal hee nahi aata Arman…”wapas mudkar Nisha boli “ye kahani sirf hum dono ki thi…”

“nahi…tune jabran David ko is kahani me ghusaya… warna kisi ko kya interest hoga tere bachpan ke dost pe”

“David ne meri family ko abuse nahi kiya….David ne kal raat daru peekar hungama nahi kiya…David ne mujhe kabhi nahi rulaya…par isme bhi galti meri hee hai…mujhe kya pata tha ki David ke sath rahne ke karan tum itna insecure feel karoge…aur yahi chiz prove karti hai ki tum wo nahi ho jo tum sari duniya ko dikha rahe ho…Arman I’m sorry… tum mahan ho,lekin hum nahi..hum normal log hai aur hume normal logo ke sath rahna hee pasand hai…in short…tumhari language me kahu toh hum tumhare layak hee nahi hai…mujhe ummid hai ki jo tumhare layak hai ya jise tum chahte ho wo tumhe mil jayegi…Goodbye…Arman”

“good…bye…Goodbye…Ni…Nisha….Goodbye Nisha…love you 85 %....”

Iske baad Nisha waha se chali gayi…usne ek baar bhi peeche mudkar nahi dekha lekin main use tab tak dekhta raha jab tak ki wo mere aankho ke samne se oojhal nahi ho gayi…

“toh kya yahi ant hai ? the great Arman aur Nisha ki story ka….? Ya phhir koyi aur twist hai…aur ye meri aankh se aansu kyun nikal rahe hai…shayad kam sone ki vazah se…. mujhe koyi fark nahi padta kisi ke aane-jaane se.main toh bilkul bhi dukhi nahi hoon…ya phhir hoon lekin mujhe pata tak nahi hai…? …anyway ,lets follow the procedure…”

Maine goggle lagaya aur cigarette jalakar lambe-lambe kash marte hue Nisha ko jaate hue dekhta raha…aur tabhich mere muh se nikla…

“Love you ,Nisha….now 100 %.....i hope you’ll find your right one…better than me…smarter than me… I’ll always remember your tight boobs ”
.

Meri zindagi se ab kayi logo ka patta kat chukka tha jaise ki Varun… Nisha… David… Sonam… Shipra isliye mujhe ab bahut sukoon tha…mera matlab main bata nahi sakta ki in sabke chale jaane se main kitna khush hoon …ab no more ..time pe ye karna…wo karna aur no more Nisha ke boring call jhelna…kuch dino se toh BC Varun bhi philosopher ke mafiq lecture dene laga tha matlab ki wo launda jo 3 cm diameter ka circle bhi dhang se nahi bana sakta tha wo mujhe aajkal ye bata raha tha mujhe life me kya karna chahiye. Wo toh phhir bhi chalo mera dost hai… I mean dost tha, isliye use main ignore bhi kar sakta hoon lekin ye David… Nisha par meri full sulgi hui thi aur toh aur tumhe yakin nahi hoga ki Sonam bhi mujhe suggestions de chuki hai. sabki suggestion chahe kitni bhi alag kyun na ho, kitni bhi achchhi kyun na ho… sab me 9 to 5 wali job common rahti hai…BC sale…inke suggestion sunkar mujhe aisa lagta hai ki jaise koyi mujhe ye sikha raha ho ki mujhe basketball kaise khelna hai…par ab jo aham sawal tha wo ye ki ab iske aage kya…ab kya meri puri zindagi E-6 me akele beetegi ?kitna achchha ho ki colony me rahne wale sab log mar jaye. Tab toh sala maza hee aa jaye. Ya phhir main inko ek-ek karke marna shuru kar du. ?
.

Park me main bahut der tak baitha raha aur jab raat ko 9 baje park band karne ka samay hua toh colony ke guard ne mujhe hosh me lakar waha se jaane ke liye kaha…

“9 baj gaye…. ? you're right... 9 baj gaye hai”apni aankhe jaldi-jaldi laplapate hue ghadi me time dekhkar maine kaha “acha hua us dominos wale ko phone karke bol diya tha ki mere na rahne par parcel gate ke andar rakh de….”

Main park se bahar nikalkar apne flat ki taraf chal diya.is puri colony me E-6 sabse aakhiri flat tha isliye jab se main yaha shift hua tha tab se mujhe aisi feeling aane lagi thi jaise ki main is duniya ke sabse aakhiri chhor me rahta hoon…main apne flat ke andar ghusa aur pizza uthakar andar jaane laga toh dekha ki E-5 ki light jal rahi thi…..

“Rathi…ise zara ahsaas dilate hoon ki main yaha aa gaya hoon…lekin kaise ? ise maa-behan ki gali du ya phhir deewar me chadhkar uske side moot du ya phhir iske boundary ki deewar me patthar se choot ka diagram bana du ? ek kaam karta hoon…”

Maine apne room ka lock kholkar parcel andar rakha aur bahar se ek patthar uthakar Rathi ke darwaje par nishana sadhne laga…..

“darwaje pe nahi…khidki me maar…”

“good idea, two point zero”

Maine darwaje se khidki par apna target shift kiya aur ghuma kar R.Rathi ki khidki par patthar mar aur bhagkar apne room ke andar ghus gaya….Patthar seedhe jakar Rathi mam ki khidki se takraya tha… kyunki kaanch tootne ki bahut tez aawaz mere kano me padi thi.

“tu ruk…Vandana Rathi…tujhe yaha se shift nahi karwaya toh bolna…gand fad dalunga teri main ab…tujhe pata nahi ki tune kis-se panga liya hai…. Bas mera mood thoda aur satakne de tere upar, phhir dekh main kya-kya karta hoon…. Tune mujhe do letters ka option diya tha na… wahi do letter main roll karke tere dono chhed me dalunga… Good night.”

.

Main chahe upar se kitna bhi dikhawa kar loon lekin isme koyi shaq nahi ki Main ab bilkul akela ho gaya tha…mera ab na toh koyi dost tha aur na hee koyi girlfriend…aur na hee mere paas koyi kaam tha…yani ki perfect life… yahi toh main chahta tha…par ab sabse bada jo sawal tha wo ye ki ab kya ? Maine Arun ke new number pe call kiya , jo usne mujhe yaha aakar diya tha… 

“aur lawde kaha hai…”Arun ke call receive karte hee main turant bol utha… lekin us taraf se koyi aawaz nahi aayi…

“bolega be bosdiwale…”maine phhir se Arun ke samman me pyar bhare shabd kahe… lekin abki baar bhi udhar se koyi aawaz nahi aayi… jis-se mujhe apni galti ka ahsaas hua ki mujhe direct gali se shuruat nahi karna chahiye tha.

“hello… hello…. Kuch toh bol…”

“kaun hai bad-tameez”ek aurat ki cheekhti hui aawaz mere kaan me padi, jiske turant baad maine call disconnect ki aur khud se bola “lagta hai Arun ki Maa ya Behan ne call uthaya tha… relax… hota hai aisa…”

Mobile jeb me rakhkar maine bistar se 6 feet ki doori naapi aur waha paas ek kapda rakhkar dusare room me gaya aur dusare room se daudkar jaha maine marking ke liye kapda tha... waha se seedhe bistar par jump kiya 

“woohoo , I did it…”dhadam se land hote hue maine hafte hue kaha par phhir thodi der baad mujhe pata chala ki main asal me nahi haaf raha tha balki hafne ki acting kar raha tha....

Ab kya karu… pahle school kiya , phhir degree bhi hasil ki …do –teen jagah naukri bhi ki aur un sabne mujhe naukri se nikal diya...toh ab kya ? another job ? ya phhir kuch aur….

“yadi main phhir koyi private naukri karunga toh phhir se nikal ke fek diya jaunga…isliye abki baar, Modi Sarkar…yani ki ab samay aa gaya hai…jab main sarkari naukri ke liye taiyari karu….kyunki yahi wo field hai jaha main apne seniors se ladayi karke bhi bana rah sakta hoon…okay…phhir done ki mujhe sarkari naukri karni hai…lekin kaun si…IAS ? nahi lawda…isme gand fad mehnat hai…GATE ? ye thik hai…ab apun gate ki taiyari karunga aur gate ke sath-sath khidki…bhi nikal lunga….”

“waise gate se yaad aaya ki gate ka form bharna shuru ho gaya hoga…toh bhar du ?”

“bhar de…”

“pakka… padhte waqt disturb toh nahi karega na…”

“version 2.0’s promise”

“pakka na…”

“ab kya lawda sperm se likh kar du…”

“ok, done phhir….”
.

Maine gate ka form bhara aur gate ka form bharne ke baad zameen par let kar cigarette peete hue gate ki preparation ka plan banana laga…

“ek din me chaubis ghante…jisme se char ghante sone ke liye…dus ghante padhai ke liye…do ghante cigarette aur daru peene ke liye…10+4+2= 16…phhir bhi 8 ghante bach rahe hai…chalo isme se do ghante NH-6 me loot ke liye nikal deta hoon….phhir bhi 6 ghante seedhe-seedhe khali hai…ok…16 ghante gate ki preparation…char ghante sone ke liye aur…do ghante NH-6 me dhamaka karne ke liye aur baki bache do ghante cigarette aur daru peene ke liye…16+4+2+2= 24 hours…L.H.S. = R.H.S. , hence proved….lekin aaj se nahi…abhi toh bahut taiyari karni hai….”
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Yahi sochate hue main zameen par letkar bina kash khiche cigarette jalata raha aur phhir pura dum lagakar ek kash khicha.cigarette ke us ek dumdar kash ke dauran meri nazar ceiling fan par gayi….fan bahut tez chal raha tha aur jis direction me pankha ghoom raha tha(clockwise) meri aankh bhi usi direction me ghoomne lagi…shuru-shuru me toh mere aankh ke ghoomne ki speed bahut slow thi…lekin samay ke sath mere aankh ki bhi ghoomne ki speed badhti gayi….maine ye sab aise hee time pass ke liye shuru kiya tha lekin ab ye rook nahi raha tha…meri aankh itni tez rotate karne lagi thi mera sar chakrane laga tha…aur phhir ek samay aisa aaya jab meri aankh ki rotational speed fan ke rotational speed ko match kar gayi….jiska pata mujhe tab chala jab fan dheere-dheere slow hokar rook gaya tha…lekin ye haqiqat me nahi hua tha….haqiqat me toh fan ab bhi ghoom raha tha…jiski hawa main mahsoos kar sakta tha…actually ho ye raha tha ki mere aankh ki rotational speed fan ki speed ke equal ho gayi thi…yani ki fan aur mere aankh ke beech relative motion zero ho chukka tha…isliye mere room ka ceiling fan mujhe rooka hua dikh raha tha…jabki actual me wo bahut tez speed ke sath ghoom raha tha aur meri aankh bhi.

Main kab tak aise hee zameen par pada raha mujhe nahi maloom par bahar jab kisi ne mera name pukara toh main mano hosh me aaya aur apni aankh mijte hue bahar gaya…..

“Varun tu… ?”

“kyun be…aaj coaching nahi jana kya…” 

“lawda,phhir se past me  never mind…pankhe ki maa ki choot….”

“kya bol raha hai be…chal jaldi…warna janta hai na ki physics wala teacher kaise insult karta hai…”

“tu do minute rook, main do minute me aaya…”


Varun ko rukne ke liye kahkar main andar gaya aur apne bag se sara samaan zameen me fek-kar sirf ek rough copy bag me dalkar bahar aa gaya. maine Physics ki book bhi nahi li thi kyunki jo Physics main tution me padhne wala tha ,wo sab mujhe pata tha balki us-se kuch jyada hee matlba bahut jyada. You know its apun’s language….maine apne gharwalo ko aawaz di…lekin meri aawaz sunkar koyi nahi aaya jis-se maine ek aur baar aawaz di par nateeza wahi raha…yani ki is baar bhi kisi ne koyi response nahi diya…jisase mujhe shaq hua ki kahi kisi ne silently mere ghar walo ko tapka toh nahi diya…isliye maine pura ghar chhan mara …..

“kamal hai ,mere ghar me mere aalwa koyi nahi hai…”bahar aate hue main Varun se bola “tujhe pata hai kya Varun ki mere gharwale kaha gaye hai…”

“mujhe kaise pata hoga…”apna kandha uchkate hue Varun ne jor se jawab diya….

“toh chillata kahe hai be…”ek mukka markar maine Varun se kaha…

“waise tune mujhe kal school me bataya tha ki tu ,kal apne family ke sath kisi Pandey ji ke yaha jayega…lagta hai tere gharwale tujhe chhodkar chale gaye… main toh ye bhool hee gaya tha, warna tere ghar thode aata.lekin achchha hee hua ki aa gaya”

“ho sakta hai…main toh so raha tha…ya phhir ye bhi ho sakta hai ki maine hee jaane ke liye mana kar diya ho…waise aaj taarikh kaun si hai…”

“28”

“full form me bata be..”

“28th November 2009…”

“November….mahina chal raha hai ? ”

“haan toh isme itna khush kyun ho raha hai….”

“chal bata ki 2011 me world cup kaun jeetega…”

“India…”Varun ne jawab diya….

Aur Varun ka jawab sunte hee main road par khushi se nachne laga…yesss…yani ki yun hardum past me aana meri koyi bimari nahi hai…balki ek ability hai…main past events ko change kar sakta hoon…past me jakar apna messege de sakta hoon…jiske according sab kuch real me change ho sakta hai…toh kya is tarah main apne college ki story badal sakta hoon ? bilkul badal sakta hoon…? Main councilling ke dauran us college ka option hee nahi dalunga…jisme main padh chuka hoon…is tarah main apna future safe kar lunga…yay… main mahan, mera sab kuch mahan…

“itna naach kyun raha hai…”mujhe bakchod ki tarah sadak par kudate-fadte dekh Varun ne pucha…

“tu nahi samjhega…tu ye bata ki 2015 me india world cup jeetegi ya nahi…”

“mujhe kya pata…wo toh tu kal school me ek ladke se 2011 world cup kaun jeetega is topic me ladayi kar raha tha…tera kahna tha ki India aur us ladke ka kahna tha ki Australia…aur tu ab mujhse na lade isliye maine India kah diya….”

“lavde ke baal…”apne emotion ko control karke maine Varun ke pichhwade me ek laat meri aur badle me apne pichhwade me ek laat bhi khayi aur phhir apna pichhwada sahlate hue bola…

“main khamkha kya-kya sochne laga tha…lekin tune mere sare armano par muh se mutth mar diya…”

“muh se mutth…?”bolkar Varun apna muh alag-alag shape me banana laga… “yuck”

“ab ye kya kar raha hai…”

“muh se mutth maar raha hoon…”

“bakchod sale…acha ye bata…tution me kaun sa topic chal raha hai…”

“laws of motion…”

“mujhse sab banta hai…”
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Kya maine kabhi apne school ke physics teacher ke bare me bataya hai ? mujhe thik dhang se yaad nahi…isliye yadi bataya bhi ho toh ,dobara bata deta hoon…humare school ke Physics teacher ka name Amarnath Shukla tha…aur sala ek number ka chodu…bakchod…lanth aadmi tha…aap zindagi me ek baar kisi ladki ko samajh sakte ho lekin Amarnath ko samajh pana….koyi chance hee nahi….humne uska name pyar se Amaru rakha hua tha…jo ki use bhi pata tha…lekin wo ise enjoy karta tha…uski ek khas property thi ki wo standard temperature aur atmospheric pressure me kisi ke bhi samne, kisi ko bhi… kuch bhi bol deta tha ,phhir chahe wo uske students ho ya phhir uska beta…ya phhir uski biwi. Uski biwi tana-tan maal thi aur ghar me aane wale har mard ko vaasna ki nazar dekhti thi…ya phhir nahi dekhti thi…main is bare me confirm nahi hoon…lekin Amaru ka launda bahut pahuchi hui chiz tha…ghar me jaha wo gand-fati me rahta wahi bahar full ayyashi pelta tha…mujhe ab bhi yaad hai Amaru ke bete ka ek kissa jisme usne apne se 6 saal badi ladki ko bus-stand me khullam khulla propose mara tha…wo bhi apne liye nahi balki apni colony me rahne wale apne jaise hee ek launde ke liye… us din humari toh gand hee fat gayi thi aur hum soch me pad gaye the ki BC Amaru ne kis angle se apni biwi ko chodkar ise paida kiya hai.anyway….

Amaru ko Physics ke bare me knowledge toh bahut tha lekin uske ajeeb bartaav ke karan uski class science ki class kam…comedy classes jyada lagti thi…aur bas yahi se mujhe physics me interest aaya…dusare shabdo me kahu toh Amaru mera inspiration tha aur yadi ise teesare sabdo me kahu toh Amaru hee wo shaks tha jis-se maine seekha tha ki Physics aur bakchodi ko mixup kaise karna hai.
Hum paanch launde Amaru ke yaha physics padhne jaya karte the…par waha padhayi kam bakchodi jyada hoti thi…abhi Shukla ji ne first law of motion padhaya hee tha ki unhe bhookh lagne lagi….aur unhone apni biwi ko khana lane ke liye kaha….

“tum log bhi khaoge kya…”

“nahi sir…”Varun ne jawab diya…

“dekho agla topic hai force yani ki bal…jab tum kisi bhi chiz ko dhakka dete ho aur wo gati karne lagti hai toh usme bal ki ek matra kaam karti hai…jise hum F=ma se nikalte hai…lekin yadi bal lagane se wo chiz ya vastu gati nahi karti toh….”

“sir, wo bal nikalne ka derivation aapne nahi bataya…”smart banne ki koshish karte hue Varun ne ek sawal daga…

“ajeeb aadmi ho yar, tum toh Physics ki maiyya chod de rahe ho.beech me disturb kyun kar rahe ho..bakchod-vakchod ho ka…Arman, maro sale ko…”

Amarnath sir ne aisa kaha…jo ki unka chir-parichit andaaz tha aur phhir maine bhi apne chir-parichit andaaz me ghuma ke ek mukka Varun ki peeth me jama diya…
______________________________

“ab aage se disturb mat karna…. Dekho,jab tum kisi bhi chiz ko dhakka dete ho aur wo gati karne lagti hai toh usme bal ki ek matra hoti hai…jise hum F=ma se nikalte hai…lekin yadi bal lagane se wo chiz ya vastu gati nahi karti toh usme lagaya gaya bal zero hota hai lekin iska matlab ye nahi hota ki usme koyi bal nahi lagaya gaya…example dekho…”

Example dikhane ke liye Amarnath sir apni table se uthe aur apna pura jor lagakar apni ghar ki deewar ko dono hatho se dhakka dete hue bole…

“ye dekhhhoo… maine is deewar me apne dono hatho se bal lagaya lekin deewar me koyi motion nahi hua…lekin yaad rakhna ki bal phhir bhi lag raha hai…lag raha hai…lagte hee ja raha hai…ufff…gand fat gayi”

jo example Amarnath ne hume bataya tha…wo physics ki book me bhi tha aur hum sab easily samajh bhi gaye the lekin Amarnath sir the ki hume demonstration dene me tule hue the…wo is samay deewar ko puri taqat ke sath dhakel rahe the aur unhe aisa karte dekh hum sab jor-jor se hasne lage…

“dekho…deewar ki position me koyi changes nahi hai…lekin bal lag raha hai…lag raha hai…kamal hai yar, main idhar padha raha hoon …udhar tum log has rahe ho…bakchod ho ka sab ke sab…tumlog ko physics padhane se achchha hai ki main konte me jakar mutth maar loon…”

Bal lagne ka demonstration dene ke baad Amarnath sir wapas apni chair par baithe aur bistar ki chadar se apna paseena pochhne lage…

“sir, ab bhi bal lag raha hai kya…”maine pucha…

“bal lag raha hai aur lagte hee ja raha hai”

Amarnath ne apna paseena saaf karne ke baad apne launde ko bulaya aur apne jeb se saman ki list nikal kar use saman lane ke liye kaha.jise unka launda turant lekar aa gaya…

“tumhara khana nahi bana kya…”andar apni biwi ko aawaz marte hue sir ne puchha

“bas nikal rahi hoon”

“jaldi lao…”

Ab hume padhana chhod Sir wo saman dekhne lage ,jo unka beta lekar aaya tha…aur jab unhone bag me rakha saman pura check kar liya toh apne bête ko paas bulaya aur use ek thappad markar puchha…

“poha kyun nahi laya…”

“mummi ne mana kiya tha…”cheekhte hue unke bête ne jawab diya jispar sir ne ek aur thappad mar kar kaha…

“hum na, tumhari mahtari ke gand me char laat markar wapas bhej denge…samjhe…ab ja yaha se aur apni mahtari ko bol ki khana laye”

Itne me unki wife unke liye khana lekar aa gayi…unki wife ne humse bhi pucha ki kya hum log bhi khana khayenge lekin humare naa bolne par wo hum sabko smile dekar andar chali gayi….Amarnath sir bahut der tak thali ko ghoorte rahe aur phhir eka-ek tez aawaz me unhone apni biwi se pucha…

“ye kya banayi ho ji…”

“kadhi…chawal “unki biwi ne andar se hee jawab diya…

“ye kadhi chawal hai….ya tatti chawal…kyun ji Varun, tum dekh ke batao…ki ye kya hai…”

“nahi sir…mujhe nahi dekhna…”

“are dekho toh…tatti type se dikh rahi hai ya nahi…’

“yuck…”

“bathroom se tatti lakar chawal me mila diya hai…main nahi khaunga “bolkar Amarnath ne thali zameen par fek di…jisase tatti chawal…sorry I mean kadhi chawal zameen par idhar-udhar fail gaya aur jis thali me kadhi chawal tha wo round-round wahi zameen par ghoomne laga…

Shuru me mujhe ye normal laga lekin jab bahut der tak wo thali round-round ghoomte rahi toh mera bheja apni jagah se khiska aur maine apne aas-paas dekha. Mere saare dost dheere-dheere waha se gayab ho rahe the aur waha se jab bhi koyi gayab hota tab gayab hone ke pahle unka sharir halka sa chamkane lagta tha.ab waha sirf main akela baacha tha…waha ab na toh Varun tha …na hee mere dost aur na hee Amarnath sir…sab log waha se achanak gayab ho gaye the par zameen me giri wo thali ab bhi usi speed ke sath waha zameen par gol-gol ghoom rahi thi…

“woohooo iska matlab ab main wapas present me jaane wala hoon…kitna hoshiyar hoon main…aur abki baar toh mujhe darr bhi nahi lag raha…ok… ulti ginti shuru….three…two…one…”bolte hue maine apni aankhe band ki aur thodi der baad apni aankhe kholi….

“ye kaise mumkin hai…main ab bhi yahi hoon…”chauk kar maine kaha…maine phhir se apni aankhe band ki aur teen tak ki ulti ginti shuru ki…

“abki baar hindi me karta hoon, lagta hai time travel walo ko English nahi aati.ok…teen…paune teen…dhayi…do…ek...vartman me aapka swagat hai… par ye kya…main phhir ab bhi hoon…wtf…ye kaam kyun nahi kar raha..kahi maine apni ability kho toh nahi di..”

“tum yaha se tab tak nahi jaoge …jab tak main nahi chah leti…”andar se bahar aate hue Amarnath ki biwi boli…

Maine ek baar phhir gol-gol ghoom rahi thali ki taraf dekha….ye kaise possible hai..ye toh sarasar physics ke khilaf hai…mana ki Amaru ne isme bal lagaya tha…lekin isme toh ab bhi bal lag raha hai…lag raha hai….lagte hee jar aha hai.rukne ka naam hee nahi le raha hai.

“kya…tumne meri aawaz nahi suni…tum yaha se tab tak nahi jaoge …jab tak main nahi chah leti…”mere saamne khadi hote hui Amarnath ki biwi boli…

“maine suni thi..par mujhe maloom hai janeman ki, tu real nahi hai…isliye maine dhyan nahi diya…”Amarnath sir ki biwi ki taraf dekhte hue main bola aur sath me buri tarah chauk bhi gaya…. 

Amarnath sir ki biwi is samay mere samne khadi thi…par ye mere buri tarah chaukne ki vazah nahi thi…main buri tarah chauka, uski vazah ye thi ki Amarnath ki biwi mere samne is samay puri nangi khadi thi aur unka pura badan pani me bhiga hua tha….maine unhe dekha aur unhe dekhte hee main unhe dekhta rah gaya… 


“mujhe pata hai ki…tum inke paas coaching padhne kyun aate ho…tum apne dosto se kahte ho ki Amarnath sir bahut funny hai…isliye tum unke paas padhne jaate ho…lekin main aur tum bhali-bhati jante hai ki yaha tum kyun aate ho…yaha tum mere liye aate ho….”aage badhte hue wo boli…aur jaise-jaise wo meri taraf badh rahi thi mera gala sookhta ja raha tha…

Amarnath sir ki biwi apne pure badan se pani tapkate hue bistar par chadhi aur phhir apne ek pair se mere lund ko sahlane lagi…..sahlane kya,ye bolo masalne lagi…yaha tak usko bhi.

“tum batao Arman…kya tum mujhe chodne ki ichchha lekar yaha nahi aayt…”

“haan…mera matlab na…bilkul nahi”

“mujhe…jhooth bardasht nahi…. sach batao…”
unhone apni peeth mere taraf kar di aur jhuk kar apni gand meri taraf karke mujhse puchhi

“kya tum isme apna lund nahi ghusana chahte….”

“chahta hoon..mera matlab nahi chahta hoon..aaa, abey apna pair toh hata raand” dard se karahte hue maine kaha…


Jiske baad Amarnath sir ki biwi wapas meri oor palti aur apna ek pair mere lund se hatakar seedhe mere mathe par rakh kar mujhe bistar me let jaane ka ishara kiya….mere bistar par let jane ke baad usne apna ek pair mere baye kandhe ke bagal me rakha aur apna dusara pair mere daye kandhe ke bagal me rakha…jisase uske sharir aur choot se pani tapak kar seedhe mere muh me girne laga….maine apna muh band kiya aur use hatane ki koshish ki…lekin wo apni jagah se hili tak nahi…maine ek aur baar koshish ki lekin wo thi ki pahad ke mafiq apni jagah par khadi rahi…yani ki bal lag raha tha lekin motion zero tha….aur uske choot se pani ki boond lagatar muh me gir rahi thi….maine use apne upar se hatane ki kayi koshish ki lekin main har baar nakam raha...wo bahut der tak mere upar pani tapkati rahi aur phhir ahiste se wo mere muh ke upar baith gayi…jisase uski choot ya phhir gand seedhe mere muh ke contact me aaya….

“iski maa ka…bc randi….uth…Sali…burchatta samajh ke rakhi hai kya mujhe…abey main Shri Arman hoon…” ghuti-ghuti aawaz me maine kaha…lekin Amarnath sir ki biwi thi ki mere upar se hatne ka naam hee nahi le rahi thi…balki wo apne choot ko mere muh me aur bhi jyada force ke sath dabaye ja rahi thi…jisase mera dum ghootne laga… mujhe saans lene me dikkat hone lagi…meri aankhe dum ghutne ki vazah se ab apne aap band hone lagi thi aur apni aankh puri tarah se band hone ke pahle maine jo aakhiri chiz dekhi wo ye ki jo thali itni der se non-stop full speed ke sath ghoom rahi thi…uski speed ab dheere-dheere kam ho rahi thi….

“ab samjha…”lagatar kam hoti thali ki speed ko dekhkar maine khud se kaha 

“jaise-jaise thali ki speed kam hogi, meri jaan waise-waise version 1.0 se 3.0 me transfer hogi aur jab thali ekdum se ruk jayegi…tab main completely version 3.0 me transfer ho jaunga…ye sara khel relative motion ka hai, BC….anyway, abki baar counting sankrit me karta hoon… shayad safal ho jaun…ok… countdown in sanskrit…treeni…dve…ekam…”
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Aur abki baar sanskrit me meri counting kaam kar gayi…main sach me apne present time me laut chuka tha…jiska andaza mujhe tab hua jab maine khud ko apne flat me pankhe ke neeche leta hua paya… maine dekha ki pankhe ki speed lagatar badh rahi thi yani ki ab meri aankh aur pankhe ke beech Relative motion ab zero nahi tha…

“ab samjha ki main past me kyun chala jata hoon…actually ye sab kuch relative motion ka kamal hai…time ko teen part me divide kiya gaya hai….present…past..future aur in sabki apni alag-alag speed bhi hogi…aur isiliye hum time ke is boundation ko paar nahi kar pate par jab kinhi do time ki yani ki Past,Present ya present,future ki velocity kisi bhi vyakti ke liye same ho jati hai toh wo vyakti time ke is boundation ko cross kar sakta hai…jaise ki kuch dino se mere sath ho raha hai...actual me ye sab relative motion ka khel hai…jab-jab main past me jata hoon tab-tab mere liye past aur present ki relative speed zero hoti hai…nahi zero nahi…zero se thodi adhik hoti hogi…tabhi toh present ka ek ghanta past ke lagbhag 12 ghante ke barabar hota hai…yani ki relative velocity zero nahi hoti balki zero se thodi adhik hoti hai…par itni adhik nahi ki main past me na ja saku…jaise ki do train jo dheere-dheere chal rahi hai…unme se ek train ka passenger dusari train me kood kar chala jata hai..kyunki us samay un dono train ki speed bahut kam hoti hai….aur jab ye past aur present wapas apne original speed me move karne lagte hai toh main past dwara wapas apne samay me fek diya jata hoon…kyunki tab santulan banaye rakhne ke liye present mujhe wapas bula leta hai…yani ki kul milakar ye sab relative velocity ka khel hai…is it ? ya phhir koyi aur reason hai ? gand maraye…Shri Arman toh ab daru peekar mathematics solve karenge…wo bhi raatbhar. Kitna stamina hai mere andar…main just abhi-abhi ek duniya se dusari duniya me aaya hoon aur aate hee padhne baith gaya sach kahta hoon maine apne se jyada mahan insaan aaj tak nahi dekha….aur isi mahanta ko sakshi maankar main ye shapath leta hoon ki main Physics-Putra Shri Arman, kal Ganga-Jamuna randi chodne jaunga.”

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to understand this chapter completely pls see "clear your confusion" column in 1st page

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Chapter-15: Ganga-Jamuna

Update-47

is it ? ya phhir koyi aur reason hai ? gand maraye…Shri Arman toh ab daru peekar mathematics solve karenge…wo bhi raatbhar. Kitna stamina hai mere andar…main just abhi-abhi ek duniya se dusari duniya me aaya hoon aura ate hee padhne baith gaya. sach kahta hoon maine apne se jyada mahan insaan aaj tak nahi dekha….aur isi mahanta ko sakshi maankar main ye shapath leta hoon ki main Physics-Putra Shri Arman, kal Ganga-Jamuna randi chodne jaunga.”
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Main apne room se bahar nikla aur dekha ki Vandana Rathi ka flat yani ki E-5 ki khidki tooti hui thi...lekin maine uspar jyada dhyan nahi diya Aur waha se aage badh gaya….

“rook BC…aaj goli marunga…bahut udd rahi thi Sharda Enterprises me…ab tere wahi pankh…jiske dum par tu itna udd rahi thi…unhe katkar teri gand me nahi bhar diya toh bolna….Vandana Rathi, tere achchhe din aane wale hai..”

Vandana Rathi ko aisi kayi galiya dekar main colony se bahar aaya aur NH-6 me khade hokar auto ka intezaar karne laga….tabhi ek autowala mere paas aakar ruka…

“kaha malik…”auto rok kar auto wale ne mujhse pucha…

“Ganga-jamuna…itwari…”

“baitho…”

“hata nahi jaunga…”bolkar main auto se thoda door aa gaya…

“kyun nahi jaoge malik…”apni garden side se nikal kar us autowale ne pucha…

“mujhe tere auto ka number nahi pasand…upar se tera auto diesel se chalta hai jiske chalte humara environment ka santulan bigad raha hai aur main nahi chahta ki log ye bole ki Shri Arman ko apne earth ke environment ki koyi parvaah nahi hai…tu khud soch itna bada aadmi hokar main aisa chhota kaam karunga…”goggle lagate hue maine kaha “so best option for you is just get lost…”

Maine us auto me nahi gaya aur na hee uske baad aane wale agle teen auto me…problem wahi ki wo sab auto diesel se chalne wale the…

“ganga-jamuna, itwari chaloge kya…”finally jab ek petrol se chalne wala auto aaya toh use rukwa kar maine puchha…jiske baad wo auto wala aur uske auto me baithe sabhi log mujhe ghoor kar dekhne lage…

“aise kya dekh rahe ho tum sab…tum log bhi chalo….”

“dedh sau lagega…”

“arey tu do sau le liyo…lekin ekdum perfect point me chhodna padega…wo kya hai paidal chalne me energy loss ho jati hai”

“baitho phhir…”


Itwari yani ki Ganga Jamuna red light area pahuchane me mujhe yahi kuch 40-45 minutes lage aur aakhir me auto me main aur sirf wo autowala tha….

“koyi lafda toh nahi hota na idhar….”auto se utar kar maine puchha…

“kis chiz ka lafda bhai…sab kuch toh khulla hai…ab chaho toh video bana lo…yaha koyi kuch nahi bolne wala…yaha ki ladkiya chahe kitne hee kapde pahan le…logo ko wo nangi hee nazar aati hai…”

“le tu apna do sau pakad…maine toh tujhse yaha hone wale lafde ke bare me pucha tha…lekin tum toh lawda gyan hee chodne lage…mujhe koyi fark nahi padta ki kaun kis halat me hai”

“thik hai phhir…”paise jeb me rakhte hue us autowale ne ek taraf ishara kiya aur bola “bas daddu ke area me kadam mat rakhna….wo us taraf uska ilaka hai…warna katta chala dega…abhi ek hafte pahle ki hee baat hai…uske under ki ek rakhail apne premi ke sath bhagne ki koshish me thi…daddu ne pure ilaake me dauda-dauda kar us launde ko mara…”

“aur us rakhail ka kya hua…”

“uska toh pata nahi par kahte hai ki…daddu ne beeso aadmiyo ko ek sath uske kamre me bhej diya…pahle toh unhone us rakhail ke jism ko khoob masla aur phhir jaan se maar diya…isliye daddu ke ilaake me bilkul bhi mat jana…”

“acha thik hai… main yadi zinda raha toh wapas milunga…”autowale ko hath dikhate hue maine kaha
.

Ganga-Jamuna….kitna pavitra name hai ye…pata nahi kis chutiye ne ye name is ilaake ko de diya tha.koyi kahta hai hai ye name do nritaki(dancer) Ganga aur Jamuna ki vazah se pada tha. Ganga-jamuna ki kya jhakkas arrangement thi…sadak ke left side me ek line se sirf ghar hee ghar bane the ,beech-beech me cigarette aur chay ke thele bhi the aur ghar ke samne char-paanch ladkiya…aurate baithi hui thi ya khadi thi…aur sabki kamar zero size…kuch gori thi toh kuch saanwali thi…par thi sab maal ki maal….us autowale ne sahi kaha tha…yaha ki ladkiya chahe jitne bhi kapde pahan le… nazar wo nangi hee aati hai…maine ek aur chiz jo gaur ki wo ye ki waha itne saare ghar the lekin ek bhi ghar ke saamne koyi mard jaat ka prani nahi tha…jaha dekho sirf maal hee maal…lekin sadak ke right side me jis taraf main chal raha tha udhar iske ulat hee mahol tha….sadak ke right side me badhiya badi-badi dukane thi…jaha mujhe aurat jaat ki koyi prani nazar nahi aa rahi thi…mujhe sadak ke right side me jo bhi dikhta wo ya toh koyi ladka hota…ya koyi aadmi ya phhir koyi budha…..aur sab apne-apne kaam me busy the…isliye maine bhi goggle lagaya aur cigarette peete hue apne kaam me busy ho gaya…main sadak ke right side me bane ek chay wale ke paas gaya aur bola…

“Daddu bhai kaha milenge….”

“kaun Daddu bhai…?”

“main police ka aadmi nahi hoon be…jo mujhse chhipa raha hai…mujhe toh bas kuch kaam hai Daddu se…”

“hum kono Daddu ko nahi janat hoon…”

“gadfatt kahi ka…”waha se aage badhte hue maine kaha…aur next thele wale ke paas gaya…jaha phhir se mujhe wahi sab kuch sun-ne ko mila jo ki mujhe pahle thele wale se sunne ko mila tha yani ki wo bhi ek number ka gadfatt aadmi tha…isliye abki baar main teesare thele wale ke paas gaya aur jate hee bola ki main police ka aadmi hoon jisase wo thele wala thoda saham gaya aur mere bina kuch puchhe hee bol pada…

“mazboori me ye sab karna padta hai sahib…warna kaun apni biwi ki dalali karna chahega…”

“jurm…jurm hota hai …chahe mazboori me kyun na kiya gaya ho…chal thane…”

“humka maaf kai do sahib…”

“chal nikal hazar rupaye…”

“hazar rupaye…oo toh abhi humre paas nahi hai…”hath jodte hue usne mujhse kaha…

“chal phhir ye bata ki Daddu kidhar rahta hai aur yadi tune bola ki kaun daddu…toh teri biwi ko toh chodunga hee…tujhe bhi thane me lejakar chodunga…isliye seedhe-seedhe apna muh khol aur Daddu ka address bata…”

“kaun Daddu…”

“sale dalle…”uski garden pakad kar dabate hue main bola “chal apna boriya-bistar bandh…aaj tujhe thane lejakr police ka danda teri gand me nahi dala toh mera name bhi ACP Arman nahi…”

“humka jaye do...” mere pair pakad kar rote hue wo bola aur tab meri fati ki kahi koyi panga na jaye…isliye maine use uthaya aur use chup karate hue bola….

“ek shart par…main tujhe chhodunga…pahle ye bata teri biwi kaha hai…”

“kyun…”

“ab ye bhi main hee batau…chal mujhe lekar…”
.

Us thele wale ne apna thela khiska kar wahi paas me ek dusare thele wale ke paas apna thela khada kar diya aur mujhe lekar waha se chal pada…jaha usne apna thela laga rakha tha uske thik samne sadak ke us paar uska ghar tha…lekin wo mujhe peeche se ghuma kar le gaya… aur ghar ke peeche wala darwaza jor-jor se khatkhataya…

“aayi…”andar se ek aawaz aayi…

Aawaz toh normal thi lekin darwaza khulne ke baad jo maal bahar aayi wo normal nahi thi…wo BC itni hot aur itni jyada sexy thi ki mujhe ek pal ko laga ki mera pant me hee gir jayega…lekin maine khud ko control kiya aur andar gaya…mere andar jaane ke baad wo aadmi jo mujhe yaha tak lekar aaya tha waha se chup chap khisak liya…jiske baad us aurat ne andar se room band karke mujhe ek kamre me aane ka ishara kiya…maine pure ghar ka jayja liya…us ghar me teen kamre the…jisme se ek kamre ko un logo ne kitchen bana rakha tha…deewaro ki halat kafi jarzar thi aur mujhe thoda-thoda darr bhi lagne laga tha ki kahi deewar bhasak na jaye…par mere samne jo ek problem abhi thi wo ye ki main use ladki kahu ya aurat…same wahi problem jo Vandana Rathi ko dekhkar hui thi…isliye andar jakar maine cigarette jalate hue uska name puchha…

“Madhulika….”charpayi me baithte hue usne jawab diya

“huh,bakwas name…”


Main pahli baar kisi red light area me nahi aaya tha…aur jaisa ki mera past experience tha uske hisaab se ye sab itni gumsum nahi hoti hai…jitni ki ye hone ka dikhawa kar rahi hai…mujhe Arun ne bataya tha ki kaise jab wo randi chodne gaya tha…toh randi ne uske wallet se pura paisa chheen liya tha….uske hisaab se ya toh ye lawdi hoshiyari chod rahi hai ya phhir abhi-abhi dhandhe me aayi hai…par sabse jyada jis baat ne mujhe pareshan kiya wo ye ki ye us thele wale ki biwi bilkul nahi lagti…BC kaha wo kariya,takla 60 saal ka dikhne wala gandul aur kaha ye 28-29 saal ki rapchik maal…upar se kitni chikni hai ye aur taiyar toh aisi hui hai jaise ki miss world contest me participate karne wali ho…

Main wahi bistar se thodi door me baitha aur cigarette fookte hue Madhulika ko dekhta raha…wo nihayat hee gori..chikni thi aur koyi solid perfume laga rakhi thi…kamar ke upar usne sirf blouse pehan daal rakha tha , jo ki bahut kasa hua tha aur kamar ke neeche ek salwar…baaki pura portion khali tha…jisase mujhe shaq hua ki isne underwear pahni hogi ya nahi….

“chod na be…”maine khud se kaha…

“pagal hai kya…aise kaise chod du…”

“dekh lawda ,chodna hai toh chod nahi toh nikal idhar se…”

“ok”

Khud ke andar josh bharkar main chair se utha aur bistar me uske side me baith kar uska name ek baar phhir puchha….

“Madhulika…”

“wo takla tumhara husband hai ?”

“nahi pitaji hai wo mere…”

“pitaji…? BC dalla…ek baar ka kitna leti ho”

“500 ”

“har baar paise mil jate hai ? mera matlab yadi koyi tumhari leke tumhe na de…toh kya ukhad loge tum uska….”

“pitaji pahle paise lete hai aur phhir kisi ko yaha late hai…adhiktar unke dost hee yaha aate hai,jinse unhone udhari li hoti hai….”

Maine apne hath se pahle uski gori chikni kamar kamar sahlayi aur phhir apna hath uske salwar ke andar daal diya….

“acha ye bata…”uski salwar ke andar hath daalkar uski jaangh ko masalte hue maine kaha “tu raat ko booking me bhi jati hai kya…booking matlab…raat bhar tu kisi ke yaha rahi ho…”

“nahi…”

“booking me chalegi…”

“mere pitaji se puchho…”

“is sabki shuruat kaise hui….matlab first time tune …kaise….kaha….tu samajh rahi hai….”uski salwar kholkar utarte hue maine puchha aur jaisa ki mera shaq tha usne underwear nahi pahni thi….salwar utarne ke baad maine uski blouse bhi utar di…. 

“sach-sach batana …police me hoon main…yadi jhooth bola toh jail me daal dunga…”

“mujhe ab koyi fark nahi padta ki…kaun kaha dal raha hai…aur aapne pahli dafa ka puchha hai toh bata deti hoon….wo raat ka samay tha jab mere pitaji apne dosto ke sath ghar me jua khel rahe the…wo aksar aisa karte the…lekin us din jab unke paas paise khatm ho gaye toh unhone udhari me kuch paise apne dosto se liye….aur wo udhari ke paise bhi jue me haar gaye…jiske baad unhone mujhe daav par rakh diya….us samay main andar khana bana rahi thi…meri toh rooh kanp gayi thi ye sunkar….maine suna ki kaise mere pitaji apne dosto ke beech meri boli laga rahe the…kisi ne pach sau kaha toh kisi ne ek hazar aur phhir ant me do hazar me mere pitaji ne mujhe ek raat ke liye apne dosto ke hawale kar diya…..” 

“ye le…”Madhulika ke hath me condom dete hue main bola….

Madhulika ne bina samay gawaye mere hath se condom ka packet liya aur muh se condom ke packet ko fad kar condom mere lund ko pahna diya….jiske baad maine use upar uthaya aur uski choochiyo ko dabane laga….main jab tak uske doodh dabata raha wo bina kisi harqat ke waisi ki waisi jis postion me thi, wahi jami rahi….mano koyi laash ho, BC koyi effect tak nahi…isliye maine kaskar , uski choochiya dabayi…

“chuuuusna bhi hai…? uska charge alag se dena padega….”

“chusna….?”

“maine pucha ki aapka lund chusna hai ya nahi….lund chusne ka 200  alag se dena padega…aur mujhe dena padega….”

“tera baap mujhse…do hazar lekar baitha hai aur tu alag se do sau legi….abey jitney paise maine tere baap ko diye hai…utne me main tujhe char din aakar chodunga….aur tujhe chusaunga bhi….chal baith neeche aur choos…”

“pure Ganga-Jamuna me lund choosne ka alag charge lagta hai….aap kahi bhi puchh lo….”

“mere paas ab itna hee kaam bacha hai ki main pure Ganga-Jamuna me lund chuswane ka rate puchhu…”Maine uska jabda kaskar pakda aur dabate hue bola…“pure Ganga-jamuna me koyi kisi raand ko panch sau ke badle do hazar nahi deta hai….isliye chup-chap neeche jhuk aur choosna shuru kar…warna pel-pel ke muh aur gand aise kar dunga ki dono me se kaun kya hai… pahchan nahi payegi aur ye sochne ki bhool bilkul mat karna ki maine tujhse tere past ke bare me puchha toh mujhe tujhse koyi humdardi hogi…mujhe na toh kisi ke humdardi ki zaroorat hai aur na hee main kisi ko humdardi dikhata hoon…kyunki mujhe maloom hai ki is-se kuch nahi hota…aur na hee kuch badalta hai…isliye is bhool me bilkul mat rahna ki mujhe tujhpar koyi daya aa rahi hai…isliye neeche jhuk aur thook laga kar chatna shuru kar… chal baith…neeche…”

Vivash hokar Madhulika neeche baithi aur mere lund ko ek baar me hee gapp kar gayi….jiske baad usne mere lund ko choosne ka jo silsila chalu kiya wo bahut der tak chalta raha…wo jab mere lund ko chooste-chooste thak jati toh mere lund ko beech-beech me bahar nikal deti aur hath se lund ki chamdi aage peechhe karke saans lene lagti thi….

“thook kar chat…nahi aisa mat kar…”

Maine Madhulika ke sar ko peeche se pakda aur uske baal kheenchkar apna lund uske honth aur gaal par ragadne laga….aur aisa karte-karte mere lund ne uske gaal me hee paani chhod diya….

“jaa, apna muh dhokar aa aur ek glass paani mere liye bhi lekar aa aur nangi hee rahna…warna tere baap ko arthi par lita dunga…bhoolna mat ki main ek police officer hoon….Sali randi…ab ja na…mujhe ghoor ke kyun dekh rahi hai….tujhe pata bhi nahi hoga ki main kitna frustrated hoon…mera vash chale toh prithvi se tumhari jaat hee mita doon….”

Paanch minute tak wo room se attached jhat barabar bathroom me apna chehra saaf karte rahi aur phhir bathroom se nikal kar mere liye paani lene chali gayi…Waise toh wo shuru-shuru me zinda laash thi lekin jab se maine use gaali dena shuru kiya tha uski aankh nam hone lagi thi….shayad use mere shabd kaante ki bhati chubh rahe the…wo nangi hee apni gand matkate hue pani lene gayi aur jaise hee wo matke se paani nikalne ke liye jhuki uski gand khulkar mere samne aayi jiske karan mujhse raha nahi gaya aur maine daud kar use peeche se pakad liya….

“paani rahne de….”uski choot me ungali dalte hue maine kaha “chal ek baar phhir se choos kar khada kar….”

“ab mujhse nahi hoga…mujhe ab ghin aa rahi hai…”

“chal phhir nikal mere do hazar rupaye…”uske pond me ek thappad marte hue maine kaha… “mere paise nikal ya phhir mera pakad ke muh me le…warna….maar-maar ke laal kar dunga…”

Maine back to back do-teen thaqppad uski gori pond me jad diye…jisase wo sisakne lagi.pahle toh mujhe laga ki uski siskiya wo wali siskiya hai lekin baad me pata chala ki wo toh rone wali siskiya thi aur tabhich mujhe ladkiyo ke bare me ek chiz maloom chali ki ladkiya maar nahi sah sakti….wo bahut nazuk hoti hai…humare tattoo ki tarah aur unhe sambhal kar rakhna padta hai….warna unki halat Madhulika jaisi ho sakti hai…

Madhulika aur maar sahan nahi kar saki aur paani ka glass gusse se neeche palat kar wapas meri taraf palti aur neeche baithkar gusse me jaldi-jaldi mera lund choosne lagi….itni tezi se ki paanch minute pahle salami de chukka mera lund phhir se salami dene ke liye taiyar hone laga…Madhulika jitni tez gati ke sath mere lund ko choos rahi thi…main bhi utni tezi ke sath uski choot me apni ungali andar-bahar kar raha tha….humari gati badhti gayi aur hum dono siskiya lene lage….mera lund chuste waqt ek do baar Madhulika ne apne daant bhi gada diye…lekin mere andar abhi itna josh tha ki mujhe koyi fark hee nahi pad raha tha….maine Madhulika ko roka aur use wahi matke ke paas zameen par lita kar uske upar chadh gaya….lekin maine apna lund uski choot me turant nahi dala…main bahut der tak apne lund ko uske choot ke muhane par rakhkar ragadta raha…beech-beech me ek-do baar main apne lund ka thoda sa hissa uski choot me dal deta lekin phhir turant nikal leta aur wapas uski choot ke muhane par ragadne lagta….Madhulika zameen me pade-pade ab angadayi lene lagi thi aur meri aankho me dekh kar mujhe ishara kar rahi thi ki main uski bur faad du…lekin maine aisa nahi kiya aur uske doodh dabate hue usase puchha….

“tum us raand ko janti ho kya….jiski maut pichhale hafte hue thi aur jise Daddu ne mara tha”

Mere is sawal par Madhulika buri tarah chauk gayi aur mujhe ektak niharne lagi….uski vaasana ki sari angdayi mano mere ek prashn se samapt ho gayi thi…wo ab wapas zinda laash ban gayi thi…aur kisi zinda laash ki bhati mujhe ghoore ja rahi thi….

“aise kya dekh rahi hai…”Mahulika ke dono doodh dabate hue maine puchha 

“uska name Kaamini tha… aap usko jante the…”

“ek number ki randi thi Sali…ek bechare sharif launde ko apne changul me fasa kar jaan se marwa diya bechare ko….maine news paper me padha tha ki use Daddu ke aadmiyo ne mara tha….kya ye sach hai…”uske muh me apni ungaliya dalte hue main bola aur Madhulika ko ishara kiya ki meri hath ki ungaliyo ko thik wo waise hee choose jaise mere lund ko choos rahi thi…. 

Maine Madhulika ke upar chadhe-chadhe hee apni pant utar kar neeche khiska di aur shirt utar kar wahi bagal me fek diya…ab main aur Madhulika ek-dusare ke jism ke direct contact me the aur mera jism is samay vasana ki aag me dhadhak raha tha….Madhulika bhale hee ek veshya thi par meri harqate use vaasna ke sagar me dubo rahi thi…jise main uske kanpan hote jism se mahsoos kar sakta tha….maine apna lund wapas uski chut ke upar rakha aur Madhulika ke pure nange badan ko apne sharir se dabane laga jiske karan uske sharir me phhir se sihran uthi aur wo lambi-lambi saanse lene lagi….maine apna ek hath neeche lejakar uski choot ko apni ungaliyo se phailaya aur apna lund chhed me rakhkar puri taqat ke sath dhakka mara….jisase ek bahut he manoranjak aawaz pure vatavaran me gunj uthi….

“Daddu hai kaun….? Aur kya role hai uska Ganga-Jamuna me…”apna lund nikal kar uski choot ke muhane se sparsh karate hue maine Madhulika se puchha aur wapas jor se dhakka mara…

“Dadduuuu…yaha ka sher hai…adhiktar aurato ki jismfaroshi me uska bhi hath rahta hai aur har din jo aurat jitna kamati hai usme se 20 % wo khud leta hai….”

“tum log use paise kyun dete ho…matlab ki gand tum marwao aur gulaab jamun wo khaye….aisa kyun…”

“iske badle me wo hume police se protect karta hai…”

“achchha…”uski choot me apne dhakko ki raftaar tez karte hue main bola “aur jo log use apni kamayi ka 20 % nahi dete unke sath wo kya karta hai….”

“Itwari thane ka daroga uske relation me kuch lagta hai…isliye jo log use paisa nahi dete wo daroga uske ghar me chhapa mar deta hai aur dus guna jyada vasool karta hai….isliye sabhi Daddu ko uska hissa pyar se de dete hai….”

“Daddu…. dikhne me….. mere se….. jyada smart hai kya…”Madhulika ki choot me lagatar apna lund dalte hue hee maine puchha….

“nahi….”

“usne tujhe kabhi choda hai…”

“ye aap kyun puchh rahe hai…”

“tu jawab dena…”

“Daddu ne mujhe bahut baar choda hai…uska beta bhi aksar aakar apni aag bhuja jata hai…”

“Kaamini ke bare me thoda aur bata….matlab ki uske sath-sath kya-kya kiya Daddu ne….”


Maine apna lund Madhulika ki choot se nikala aur use wahi zameen par ulta letne ke liye kaha….lekin wo boli ki use zameen me dukh raha hai….isliye hum dono waha zameen se uthkar dusare room me rakhi charpayi par gaye….Madhulika ulti late gayi aur apni tango ko bina mere bole hee faila di…yaha tak ki usne apne dono hatho se apni pond ko failaya aur apni gand me lund dalne ka mujhe khula nyota diya….

“that’s the spirit ,ye hoti hai asli randi…jo bina bole sab samajh jaye…Vandana Rathi ko bhi ek din aise hee chodunga…uski toh main gand faad dalunga….bas kuch din wo aur aish kar le….”

Madhulika ki is harqat ko dekhkar main muskuraya aur kood kar uske upar ja baitha….wo ab bhi apne hath se apne gand ko failaye hue thi….maine pahle uski gand ko ungali se sahlaya aur phhir apni ungali uski gand me daal di…jisase wo thodi jhijhak uthi….

“lund dalne se pahle thoda thook dena…dard kam hota hai….”

“oil nahi hai kya…”Madhulika ki gand me apni ungali andar-bahar karte hue maine puchha….

“hai na…waha dusare room me rakha hai…”

“toh ja.. jakar lekar aa…warna aise hee ghusa dunga”

Madhulika wapas seedhi hui aur bistar se uthkar dusare room se oil lene jaane lagi lekin tabhi maine uske pichhwade me jhapad mara…wo bina kuch bole dusare room me gayi aur tel ka botal mere hath me dekar…wapas charpayi par ulta let gayi..maine pahle tel uski kamar par giraya aur masalte hue tel uski gand tak le gaya….

“tune Kaamini ke bare me jyada nahi bataya….”apna lund Madhulika ki gand se connect karte hue main bola….

“meri saheli thiiiiiiiiiiiiiii….aaaaiiiiiss”

“teri saheli…”chaukte hue maine apna lund Madhulika ki gand ke andar hee rakha…. “kaisi saheli thi…achchhi wali ? ”

“haan…”

“wo bhi tere type full raand thi kya….”

“aap zinda logo ko izzat nahi dete…kam se kam mare logo ko toh do…aur koyi bhi ladki apni marzi se randi nahi banti…ya toh wo mazboori me banti hai ya phhir gharwalo ke dabav me aakar use randi banna padta hai…aapko kya pata ki mazboori kise kahte hai…aap bade ghar me paida hue…achchhe school me padhe…phhir college karke naukri ki ya phhir naukri nahi bhi ki toh bhi aapko khilane ke liye aapke maa-baap hai…unki beshumir daulat hai….lekin humare paas ye sab nahi hai….hum apna jism bechkar apna aur apne pariwar ka gujara chalate hai….kabhi bhookhe rahe ho ? sari samajhdari gand me ghus jati hai ki kya sahi hai aur kya galat…”

“ bitch please…Aradhna ke case me main teen din thane me bhookha band tha…. anyway toh iska matlab teri dost bhi full raand thi…teri tarah”apna lund Madhulika ki gand se nikal kar maine kaha aur phhir jor lagakar wapas uski gand me dal diya….jiske baad Madhulika ki gand marne ka maine jo silsila chalu kiya wo bahut der tak chala…

“Daddu ke bete ne use veshya banaya tha….”jab maine final stroke uski gand me markar us-se chipak kar let gaya toh wo boli “wo Kaamini ko apni rakhail bana kar rakhna chahta tha…lekin uske hee ek dost ko Kaamini se mohabbat ho gayi aur wo Kaamini ko lekar yaha se bhag gaya….”

“wo bhagne me kamyab ho gaya tha…? Phhir Daddu ne use kaise dhoondha…”

“maine bataya tha ki wo kaha chhipi hai….”

“wooow…kahani me twist…lekin kyun”uthkar khada hote hue maine puchha aur apna lund uske honth se touch kara diya….jisase wo baukhlayi aur gussa bhi hui…..lekin kuch boli nahi….

“bata na…tune apni saheli ko kyun faswaya….jabki wo yaha se nikal chuki thi….”ek baar aur apna lund uske muh se touch karake maine puchha aur is baar wo pahle se jyada baukhla gayi….par pahle ki tarah abki baar bhi wo kuch nahi boli….bas apna muh sikod kar dusari taraf kar liya

“Daddu aur uske gunde mujhe jaan se marne ki dhamki de rahe the….pitaji ko toh unhone bahut mara bhi…”

“kabhi apne baap se badla lene ka khayal tere mann me nahi aaya ya phhir bhagwan se ”pant upar chadhate hue maine Madhulika ki taraf dekha aur apne pant ki jeb se hazar ka ek patta nikal kar uski taraf fek diya….

“main unhe ab apna pita nahi manti aur bhagwan se kaisi shikayat….bhagwan ne mujhe veshya banne ke liye nahi kaha….”uthkar baithte hue wo meri taraf dekh kar boli…

“par bhagwan ne tujhe is ilaake me paida toh kiya….?”

“par mujhe ab bhi bhagwan par bharosa hai…kam se kam mere sath wo toh nahi hua jo Kaamini ke sath hua…main zinda hoon…mere pita bhi zinda hai aur hum dono ko do waqt ka khana mil raha hai…isase jyada sochane ki meri koyi khwaish nahi hai….”

“tu zinda hai kyunki tujhe abhi tak waisa aashiq nahi mila jaisa ki Kaamini ko mila tha…aur kabhi mile bhi toh uske sath mat bhagna aur bhagwan par bharosa karna chhod de….kyunki ant me , bhagwan koyi madad nahi karne wala…infact mujhe kabhi-kabhi toh aisa lagta hai ki bhagwan hai hee nahi”pant ki jeb me hath daal kar maine ek aur hazar ka note nikala aur charpayi par rakhkar Madhulika ke doodh dabate hue bola “kal se full taiyar hokar rahna…main phhir aaunga…have a sexy day….”
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Thodi Si himmat...thodi Si chalaki aur thoda sa jhooth... Aur tum wo paa loge jiski tumne kabhi kalpana tak nahi ki thi…par main yaha kyun aaya tha ? aur ye sab kyun kar raha tha..? toh jawab hai Gun… is duniya me bahut mahan aviskar aur aviskarak hue lekin personally mera aisa manna hai ki Gun un sabme sabse mahan hai…bilkul meri tarah ! bole toh koyi dikhawa nahi, koyi bhed-bhav nahi…pelna hai toh pelna hai, phhir chahe samne wala peon ho ya prime minister..wo utna zakhm prime minister ko bhi degi jitna ki peon ko…bole toh No Discrimination ! aur Gun ka yahi attitude apun ko bahut pasand aaya aur apun idhar aaya.

Madhulika ke ghar se nikal kar main wapas sadak par chalne laga…Madhulika se vida lete waqt maine us-se Daddu ke bare me aur bhi bahut kuch jaan li thi…jaise ki Daddu ka ghar kaha hai…uska adda kaha hai….wo mujhe yaha kab milega….wagerah-wagerah…jiske anusar Daddu raat me Ganga-Jamuna ki sabse badi randi se milne aata hai….jiska khud ka ek chakla hai aur uske under me 20-22 randiya kaam karti hai….Madhulika ne mujhe bataya ki log use Ajmeri bai kahte the…kyun kahte the…ye use nahi maloom tha….Ajmeri bai Ganga-Jamuna ki sabse badi randi hone ke sath-sath sabse badi dalal bhi thi…aur sirf kuch khas logo ke sath bistar garam karti thi…jinme se ek Daddu bhi tha….


Maine ghadi me time dekha….abhi dopahar ke ek baj rahe the aur Daddu se milne ke liye mujhe raat tak ka intezaar karna tha isliye maine wahi rahkar Daddu aur Ajmeri bai ke bare me kuch aur puchh-tachh ki….aur main jis-se bhi un dono ke bare me puchhta wo mujhe ghoor kar dekhne lagte…adhiktar logo ne toh mere muh pe mana kar diya ki na toh wo Ajmeri bai ko jaante hai aur na hee Daddu ko….lekin waha kuch aise bhi the…jinhone paiso ki lalach me mujhe bahut kuch un dono ke bare me bata diya tha…jiske according….Ajmeri bai 22 saal ki thi jab uska premi use yaha bechne aaya tha….us samay wo pregnant thi…tab Daddu ki dhak utni nahi thi , wo bas Ganga-Jamuna ka mamooli gunda tha…jo randiyo ko chodne ke jugad me Itwari me ghoomte rahta tha aur wahi ek roj Daddu ne Ajmeri Bai ko dekha….jiske baad kya hua iski kahani mujhe nahi maloom….par Daddu aur Ajmeri bai ke milaap ne jaha Daddu ko is Ganga-Jamuna ka maalik bana diya tha wahi Ajmeri bai ko sabse badi raand hone ka khitab mil gaya tha….kuch log toh ye bhi kahte hai ki Ajmeri bai ke aashiqo me kayi political leader bhi hai ,jinki vazah se Daddu upar chadhta gaya….isliye maine Daddu se milne se pahle Ajmeri se milne 
ka socha lekin Jis tarah Daddu raat ko hee Ganga-Jamuna me aata hai…usi tarah Ajmeri bai ka kotha bhi raat me hee khulta tha….isliye sham ko 7 baje tak main pure Itwari me ghoomte hue mahol tadta raha aur phhir sham hote hee Ajmeri bai ke kothe ki taraf chal diya….
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Ajmeri bai ke kothe ka haal kafi acha tha…waha saaf-safai thi aur pure kothe ko Ajmeri ne aise saja kar rakha tha jaise ki waha koyi function hone wala ho….kothe me main gate se andar jaane ke baad ek bada sa hall tha jaha ek bahut bada sofa rakha hua tha jis par shayad Ajmeri bai baithkar T.V. dekh rahi thi….main Kothe ke main gate se andar gaya aur mujhe dekhte hee Ajmeri ne apni chakliyo ko aawaz mari….jiske baad wo sab waha turant aakar mere samne khadi hokar mujhe dekhne lagi…

“aage ki jo do hai unke 600  …beech me jo paanch hai unke 1000  aur peechhe wali teeno ke 1500 . Richa kaha rah gayi re…wo manager abhi tak uske sath busy hai kya….sala lagta hai bank ka pura paisa aaj uda ke hee manega….ek ghante se meri bachchi ko band karke rakha hua hai….jab wapas aaye toh double charge lena…bachchiya shikayat bhi karti hai ki sala , wo Manager jor-jor se dabata hai….”

Maine Ajmeri bai ko dekha…pahle toh mujhe yakin hee nahi hua ki yahi Ajmeri Bai hai…maine toh soch rakha tha ki ye 40-45 saal ki koyi aurat hogi…jiska pet, gand ki tarah bahar nikla hoga aur wo muh me paan daba ke randiyo ke maafiq dalali karti hogi lekin jab maine use dekha toh mujhe yakin nahi hua….uski umra Vandana Rathi ke barabar thi…ya phhir usase teen-char saal jyada….par saali ne kya maintain karke rakha tha khud ko…isne toh Madhulika…Vandana Rathi yaha tak ki khoobsurti ke mamle me Nisha ko bhi peeche chhod diya tha….kya perfect figure tha Ajmeri ka…upar se baby face…matlab ki shakl dekh kar lag hee nahi raha tha ki wo ek veshya hai….isiliye sala Daddu itna upar pahuch gaya….
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“kamal hai…maine toh socha tha ki Ajmeri Bai….paan ki peek marte hue gand jaisi shakl wali 50 saal ki budhiya hogi….lekin ye toh kayamat nikli bidu….”Ajmeri bai ko upar se neeche tak dekh kar maine socha….aur sirf socha hee kyunki lund ko toh main Madhulika ke yaha chhod aaya tha…isliye mere paas siway sochne ke kuch nahi tha….

“kya re….kaun si pasand aayi….”mujhe shant khada dekh wo boli. uski aawaz sunkar mujhe bahut bada jhatka laga…kyunki jaha ek taraf wo tanatan rapchik maal thi, wahi uski aawaz bahut kharab thi….Arun ki aawaz se bhi kharab.“Sali , muh me lawda le-le ke aawaz kaisi ho gayi hai iski….”

“kisko chodega re….”Ajmeri ne phhir apna muh fada 

Maine ek baar waha mauzood sabhi randiyo ko dekha aur phhir Ajmeri bai ki taraf apna rookh karke bola“tujhe…rate bata…”

“salaaaa…kutta…mujhe chodega…tere jaise na jaane kitne laundo ka main apne andar le leti hoon…aur tu mujhe chodega….”

“kya baat hai Ajmeri bai….suna hai yaha ki sabse badi randi hai tu…”Use uksate hue maine kaha

“isko bharo re aur itna marna ki Itwari me kabhi wapas na aaye….”

Ajmeri Bai ne jor se aawaz mari….jiske baad teen-char mustande daudkar bahar se andar aaye aur mujhe utha kar bahar le jaane lage…..

“Ajmeri….teri aawaz bahut kharab hai…Sali randi, jab chillati hai toh aisa lagta hai jaise ki gadhe ki gand me danda daal diya gaya ho…thoda kam lauda choosa kar…ya phhir mera lawda choos le….Sali randi…burchatti…”

Main itna hee bol paya tha ki un logo ne mujhe andar se lakar bahar patak diya…pahle toh unhone mujhe bahar patka aur phhir mera collar pakad kar mujhe kheechte hue kahi le jane lage…..

“Daddu ke paas le ja rahe ho na…actually main usi se milne aaya tha…Ajmeri toh sirf ek jariya tha….chalo Daddu ke paas…”maine kaha

Aur mere aisa kahne ke baad jisne mera collar pakad rakha tha usne mera collar chhod diya aur mujhse puchha ki main Daddu ko kaise janta hoon

“Daddu se bahut badi deal karni hai….par koyi address nahi bata raha tha Daddu ka…isliye ye sab karna pada…”apna collar aur shirt sahi karte hue maine kaha aur goggle pahan kar ek cigarette left side me dabaya….

“lighter hai kya….”cigarette ko left side se right side me shift karte hue maine puchha….jiske jawab me unme se ek ne machis nikali aur ek teeli jalakar cigarette ke paas le aaya….

“sorry…”machis ki teeli ko fook markar bujhate hue maine kaha “Shri Arman, sirf lighter se cigarette jalata hai…ego problem…anyway, chalo Daddu ke paas”

Iske baad unme se kisi ne mujhe hath tak nahi lagaya par wo mujhe gher kar chal rahe the…taaki main bhag na jaun….thodi der tak paidal chalne ke baad main Daddu ke adde me pahuch gaya….

“kya hua be…tum log yaha…Ajmeri ne bheja kya….”apne aadmiyo ko waha apne adde par dekhkar Daddu ne unse puchha…jispar ek apne hath bandhkar thoda jhukte hue bola…

“bhai…ye ladka…Ajmeri behan ke sath lafda kar raha tha aur unhi ke kahne par main isko yaha laya hoon…”

“isne Ajmeri ke sath lafda kiya aur tum log ise marne ke bajay mere paas lekar aaye ho…”

“i can explain it…Daddu bhai….”apna hath upar uthakar beech me main bola… “actually main yaha aapke liye hee aaya tha matlab aapse milne aaya tha”

“mil liya na, ab chal mar…”bolte hue Daddu ne apne pichhwade me hath dala aur desi katta nikal kar mere upar taan diya….

“dus hazar per piece dunga is type ke katte ke….”

“ dus hazaaaaar….”

Dus hazar ek desi katte ka rate sunkar Daddu ke hosh udd gaye…aur uske hosh aur udate hue maine boli aur badha di….

“acha… 15000 per piece….ab thik…”

“15000  har desi katte ke liye…chal aaja….aaja, baith-baith”

Daddu ne gun neeche ki aur mujhe wahi ek chair par baithne ka aamantran diya….maine ek cigarette apne muh me fasaya aur apne jeb se lighter nikal kar cigarette jalate hue wahi Daddu ke samne baith gaya…

“jab tere paas lighter tha toh humse kyun mang raha tha….”jo char mustando mujhe utha kar yaha laye the…unme se ek ne jawab diya….mera matlab puchha…

“wo toh main tum logo ki aukat check kar raha tha…anyway..”saamne palat kar Daddu se maine kaha “Daddu bhai…kitne Desi Katte ka intezaam kar sakte ho…”

“kitne chahiye tumhe….”

“yahi koyi chalis katte….”

“chalis…”

“hmmm…no. make it hundred. Sau katte. Sunne me bhi achchha lagta hai aur calculation me bhi ”

“payment kab doge….”

“delivery do baar me do alag-alag jagah par hogi…50-50 ke set me. vehicle humara hoga, bas tum time aur jagah mujhe bata dena ,har delivery ke pahle payment mil jayega..”

“karoge kya itne katte ka…”

“everyone needs a mask, you have yours…I have mine”

“kyaaaaaa….”

“ab main tumse puchhu ki tum itne katte laoge kaha se toh kya tum mujhe bata doge….”

“nahi…”

“exactly, bas main bhi nahi bata sakta….”muskurate hue maine kaha….jiske baad Daddu bhi muskura utha…


Maine Daddu ke yaha se sample ke taur par 15000 dekar ek katta liya aur salam-dua karke waha se bahar nikla….mere peeche-peeche Daddu ke aadmi bhi nikle par thodi door tak aane ke baad wo laut kar wapas chale gaye….meri is samay fat toh bahut rahi thi ki kahi Daddu ya uske aadmi mujhe peeche se goli na maar de…par kyunki jaisa maine pahle bhi kaha hai ki… Thodi Si himmat...thodi Si chalaki aur thoda sa jhooth... Aur tum wo paa loge jiski tumne kabhi kalpana tak nahi ki thi, upar se is samay main NH-6 ke Thug ke kirdar me tha…isliye main darne ke bawzood peeche palta aur Thug ke kirdar se pura nyay karte hue Daddu ke aadmiyo ki taraf cigarette peekar role me dhua chhodne laga….

“dhua chhodna band kar be…warna kahi in logo ki khisak gayi toh tujhe hee dhue me na tabdil kar de….kaise-kaise kaam kar raha hoon main…kya choda Madhulika ko aur kaise Daddu ko chodu banaya….use kya maloom ki mujhe sirf ek desi katta chahiye tha….taki main apne sapno ko saakar kar saku….abhi tak mera pair kaanp raha hai…sala Daddu ne jaan se nahi mara wahi bahut hai…yaha se jakar do peg marunga aur chup chap so jaunga…yadi neend aayi toh…pura rom-rom dark e mare kaanp raha hai…thank you bhagwan. Aisich sath bane rahna ,last time ke mafiq dhokha mat dena aur phhir dekhna ki kaise main in sabki leta hoon….”
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Ganga-jamuna se main raat ko 11 baje ke karib River View Colony pahucha…aaj din bhar ki bhag-daud ke karan main kafi thak chuka tha aur aalas itna aa raha tha ki mujhe khana khane ka bhi mann nahi kiya…waise normal day me meri energy is time pe top pe hoti hai hai par kyunki ye normal day nahi tha isliye mere sath kuch bhi normal nahi ho raha tha…siway ek chiz ke…ki baki din ki tarah mujhe aaj bhi neend nahi aa rahi thi…main bahut der tak bistar par leta raha…sone ki koshish karta raha…lekin meri laakh koshisho ke bawzood main sone me safal nahi ho paya isliye uthkar baith gaya….aur jaise hee main uthkar baitha mere side me rakha katta mere pair se touch hua….katte ko dekhkar mera matha thanka .maine katta uthaya aur daudkar apne flat ki chhat par gaya….

“yadi koyi mujh par attack karega toh main…pahle yaha chhup kar use goli marunga…aur phhir yaha chhipkar…phhir chhat par let kar chalte hue chhat ke dusare hisse me jaunga aur usi dauran gun ko dobara load karunga…aur peechhe ki taraf mauzood logo ko maar dunga…dichkyooon….lekin yadi hawai hamla hua toh ? idea …main turant kood kar pahle E-5 me jaunga..phhir E-4 me…phhir E-3 me au aise karte-karte colony ke bahar nikal jaunga….let’s make it happen”
Maine katta wahi zameen par rakha aur chhat ke ekdum kinare par khada hokar mere flat ki chhat aur R.Rathi ke flat ki chhat ke beech kitni doori hai iska andaza lagane laga…

“10 feet…nahi actually 8 feet hogi…9 bhi ho sakti hai…ek min.” Vandana Rathi ke flat me torch markar maine kaha “8.5 feet correct… but I think 8.46 would be more correct … done 8.46. ek kaam karta hoon us side se daudkar yaha aaunga aur phhir ek long jump….yess…yahi ek tarika hai hawai hamle se bachne ka…chal Arman…3.0 ”

Main apne flat ki chhat me peechhe gaya aur aankh band karke kuch der tak khud ko utsahit karta raha…phhir maine apni aankh kholi aur gand-fad tez daud kar apne chhat se Vandana Rathi ki chhat ki taraf chhalang maar di…main apne chhat se Vandana Rathi ke chhat par pahuchne hee wala tha, main bas pahuch hee chukka tha lekin sala meri jump kam pad gayi…aur main chhati ke bal seedhe chhat ke kinare se takraya…aur takra kar seedhe neeche gira…

“hey Arun kya chal raha hai…sab log chhat se kood kyu rahe hai, kahi Gautam ke baap ne gunde toh nahi bheje hostel me…”
“nahi be, wo toh shart lagi hai ki jo yaha se neeche koodkar wapas seedhiyo ke raaste se hota hua mujhtak pahle aayega use 1000  ka inaam diya jayega…”
“chal phhir, hazar rupaye lekar rakh…aaj daru peene bar chalenge”apna jeans utar kar Arun ko pakdate hue maine kaha…
“abey ab tu ye race nahi jeet sakta , wo sab bahut pahle kood gaye hai…”
“main gate andar se locked hai aur chabhi mere us jeans me hai…neeche ja aur tab tak gate mat kholna jab tak main gate ke paas pahuch na jaun…”
“wow…great. Par sambhal ke…neeche bahut bada gaddha hai…do toh usme se nikal bhi nahi paye hai…”
“ Deeper I fall, stronger I’ll rise…”itna bolkar main chhat se neeche kood gaya…
Par ye kaise ? main toh yaha hoon hee nahi…ye toh past ki memories hai… kyunki main chhat se neeche kood nahi raha , main neeche gir raha hoon….
Aur jab ye hua…. yani ki jab main seene ke bal chhat se takra kar neeche gira toh mere muh se tarah-tarah ki aawaze nikalne lagi…jisme main kabhi dard se karahta toh kabhi maze lekar hasta…sach batau toh mujhe kafi maza aa raha tha…mujhe meri chhati me jalan mahsoos hui…mujhe aisa laga jaise ki meri chhati chhil gayi ho….aur aisa hua bhi tha kyunki jab maine apne chhati me apna hath lagaya toh mera shirt khoon ki vazah se geela tha aur…aur …. aur jyada geela ho raha tha, par mujhe sabse bada dar jis baat ka tha wo ye ki kahi Vandana Rathi yaha na aa jaye…waise uske pure flat ki light band thi aur mere is karname ke baad bhi uske pure flat ki light band hee thi…jisase maine anuman lagaya ki Vandana Rathi ab bhi so rahi hai aur mere is karname ki use koyi bhanak tak nahi lagi hai …..maine khoon se lagatar bheeg rahi apni chhati ko sahlaya jiske baad mujhe aisa laga jaise mere seene me aag lagi ho..kyunki chhat se seene ke bal takrane ke karan mera seena buri tarah chhil chukka tha aur mujhe kafi jalan type ki feeling aa rahi thi par thodi der baad wo jalan band ho gayi…maine wapas apna seena sahlaya par abki baar mujhe kuch mahsoos hee nahi hua, mujhe aisa laga jaise main apni nahi balki kisi aur ki chhati sahla raha hoon….yani ki meri puri chhati ab sunn pad gayi thi….main thodi der tak wahi pada raha aur phhir kohni ko zameen me tikakar uthne ki koshish ki….lekin main uth nahi paya aur wapas wahi gir gaya aur tab mujhe chhat par thode der pahle ki hui training yaad aayi…jisme main kohni ke bal zameen me ghisat-ghisat kar chhat ke ek hisse se dusare hisse ki taraf gaya tha….
Maine zameen par apni dono kohni tikayi aur ghisat-ghisat kar aage badhne laga….isme mujhe mushqil toh ho rahi thi…par utni jyada bhi nahi….kyunki Vandana Rathi ne pure flat ke charo taraf chhote-chhote ghas lagwa rakhe the…jisase mujhe zameen par ghisatne me thodi sahuliyat mil rahi thi….main aise hee zameen ki mitti khata hua Vandana Rathi ke gate ke neeche se sarak kar bahar aaya aur aise hee zameen ki mitti khate hue ghisat-ghisat kar apne flat ke gate ke neeche se andar aaya…aur apne flat ki boundary ke andar aane ke baad main deewar ke sahare tik kar baitha aur bas wahi baitha raha….kyunki waha tak aate-aate meri puri energy khatm ho chuki thi…mere pura sharir paseene aur khoon se bheeg chukka tha aur ab mujhme itni bhi taqat nahi thi ki main hil bhi paun…mera gala bahut sookh raha tha….mera mann kiya ki Varun ko call kar du…lekin phhir socha ki mere fans kya sochenge…isliye maine Varun ko call nahi kiya…
“paa….ni….ab raat bhar yahi rahna padega….kya main marne wala hoon…”
“pata nahi, mujhe aas-paas koyi yamdut toh nahi dikh raha….”
“waise achi koshish thi…”
“haan…kal phhir karenge….”
“Good Night ,Version 2.0”
“Good Night….3.0”
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Subah main jab utha toh dekha mere shirt ka saamne wala pura hissa khoon ki vazah se laal ho chuka tha aur zameen me ghisatne ki vazah se meri kohni chhil chuki thi par sabse important baat jo is samay thi wo ye ki mujhe bahut jor se pyas lagi thi…meri halat ab is samay aisi thi ki yadi ab mujhe turant pani nahi mila toh main bas mar hee jaunga…
Maine jis deewar ke sahare tik kar kal ki puri raat guzar di thi…usi deewar ko pakad kar main utha aur langdate langdate apne flat ke andar aakar pahle toh pet bhar paani piya aur pani peene ke baad baad bathroom me pani se bhari balti ke paas baithkar apna pura sar us balti me daal diya….

“sala…gand hee fat gayi meri…main kya ban gaya hoon…is-se acha toh BC wo katta apni kanpatti pe rakh kar trigger daba doon…laanat hai aisi zindagi pe….”thodi der baad balti se apna sar bahar nikalkar main bola aur bathroom se bahar aakar farsh par hafte hue let gaya…..
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Kal raat ke karname ki vazah se mera seena bahut jagah se chhil gaya tha aur dard toh tha hee…isliye maine do-teen din room me rest karna hee behtar samjha…par phhir maine socha ki main room me pure din karunga kya…tab mujhe khayal aaya ki ….GATE…..gate ki taiyari karunga….maine khane ka order mara aur colony ke paas hee bani ek clinic me apni marham patti kara kar…kuch medicine lekar wapas apne flat me aaya…..


Mere andar ek khas baat hai ki jab main jo karta hoon tab main use pure mann se karta hoon…uske aalwa mujhe aur kuch nahi soojhta…phhir chahe wo movie dekhna ho ya cigarette peena ya phhir padhayi karna….yadi main kuch bhi karne ek baar baith gaya toh phhir bas usi me ram jata hoon…jiska example ye hai ki maine lord of the ring ke teeno part ek hee din me yani ki ek hee raat me back to back dekhe the…third part dekhte samay toh meri aankh se aansu bhi nikalne laga tha lekin main use complete karke hee utha…yadi maine ye thaan liya ki mujhe mutth marna hai toh phhir main mutth maar kar hee rahunga…phhir chahe koyi aa jaye. Bole toh mera concentration itna bhayankar hai ki main kisi se baat karte hue bhi mutth maar sakta hoon aur yahi haal abhi meri padhayi ka tha….Vandana Rathi ki chhat se takrane ke baad maine apni behtari ke liye ye decision liya tha ki main ab agle kuch din koyi dhamal nahi karunga aur isme main kayi din tak kayam bhi raha…exact kitne din ye toh mujhe yaad nahi…lekin…ek minute…main count karke batata hoon….maine apne room ki deewar ko dekha jaha maine ek kale patthar se deewar par is month ka pura calendar bana rakha tha…aur jo-jo din guzarte ja rahe the us par gola marte ja raha tha….

“teen-do…paanch…paanch-do…saat….total saat din hue hai mujhe Mathematics padhte hue….jisme bas do chapter aur baaki hai…phhir mathematics…khatam….iske baad back to back do baar revise marunga…lawda….nahi toh jo padha hai bhool jaunga…sala itne bade-bade formulae hai ki gand fat jati hai….formulae toh BC phhir bhi yaad ho jaye…lekin formulae ke name…..yaad rakhna jyada mushqil hai….chalo baki bache chapter bhi revise maar leta hoon….” .

Maine laptop me B.S.Grewal ka ebook khola aur padhne me busy ho gaya aur raat ko ek baje tak ek aur chapter saltine ke baad adhmara sa hokar bistar par let gaya….laptop me din bhar apni aankh gadane ke karan meri aankh me jalan ho rahi thi isliye apni aankh band karke main apni aankho ko sahlane laga….

“Arman sir…”

“kaun hai be…”jaise hee mujhe ye aawaz sunayi di maine turant apni aankh kholi aur apne charo taraf dekha…par waha koyi nahi tha….

“lagta hai vaham hai mera…”bolkar maine apni aankh wapas band ki aur phhir se apni aankh sahlane laga ki mujhe ek baar phhir se wo aawaz sunayi di…

“tumhari amma ka 9.8….jo bhi hai saamne aao…warna determinant me pack kar dunga…”

“main idhar hoon sir…”

“abey ye toh reply pe reply aa raha hai…mere flat me mere aalawa aur bhi koyi rahta hai kya…?”

“please sir…idhar aao…hall me meri garden jakad rahi hai…main saans nahi le pa rahi…please sir…help me…”


Ye sunte hee bhay aur aatank ne mujhe apni giraft me le liya…meri himmat nahi ho rahi thi ki main apni jagah se hil saku…lekin phhir bhi main apne bed se utha aur dheere-dheere bedroom se deewar ke sahare hall ki taraf badha….hall ki taraf badhta mera har kadam mujhe kah raha tha ki main aage na jaun…lekin main dheere-dheere deewar ke sahare aage badhte gaya aur ant me deewar ki oot se chhipkar maine hall me jhanka….

Maine dekha ki hall me lage pankhe se ek ladki latki hui thi…uske baal bikhre hue the jisase uska chehra mujhe nahi dikh raha tha. wo apni gardan me rassi fasakar pankhe se latki hui thi aur apne aap ko chhudane ki bahut koshish kar rahi thi….ek taraf jaha wo khud ko chhudane ke liye bahut chhatpata rahi thi…wahi dusare taraf apne naakhoon se apne garden aur chehre ko cheekhte hue noche ja rahi thi….us ladki ki haalat itni kharab thi ki uska peshab tak nikal gaya tha aur main kuch karne ke bajay bas deewar ki oot me khada hokar use dekh raha tha…mujhe samajh hee nahi aaya ki main kya karu…isliye main murti ke saman waha khade rahkar bas us ladki ko dekhe ja raha tha….lekin phhir us ladki ne mujhe dekh liya aur apne hath se apne baal ko hatate hue boli….

“sir..main hoon Aradhna…aaj toh bacha lo…”

“Ara..dh..dhna….”

“haan…sir…aapki rakhail…jisne college me aapke liye jaan de di thi…”

Aradhna ka chehra dekh kar mere andar na jaane kaha se itni himmat aa gayi ki maine apne bedroom se ek chair uthaya aur turant Aradhna ke paas gaya….maine chair neeche rakha aur uspar chadhkar Aradhna ko pakad liya….

Maine Aradhna ko waha se utara aur seedhe bedroom me lakar bistar par lita diya….

“thank you ,sir…”

Jawab me maine kuch nahi bola aur turant bhagkar Aradhna ke liye paani laya…

“le , paani pee le…”

“nahi…ab main thik hoon…”wo boli

Jab main Aradhna ke liye bhagkar paani lene gaya tha tab Aradhna ke baal bikhre hue the aur uske pure chehre par aise nishan the…jaise usne apne aapko noch dala ho…lekin jab main wapas aaya toh uske sharir me ek bhi zakhm nahi tha….upar wo ab aisi lag rahi thi…jaise ki usne kitna bhari make up kiya ho….aur toh aur wo mujhe dekh kar muskura bhi rahi thi…..main wahi khada hokar use dekhta raha , wo bhi mujhe dekh rahi thi….

“tum bhoot ho kya…ya phhir..atma…”

“aapko kya lagta hai…”bistar par uthkar baithte hue wo mujhse puchhi…jiska mere paas koyi jawab nahi tha…balki mere paas toh is samay bahut sawal the…jo main us-se puchhna chahta tha…kayi aise sawal jo uske suicide karne ke baad se hee mere jehan me bas gaye the aur aaj tak mujhe pareshan kar rahe the….lekin maine us-se kuch nahi puchha aur wahi bistar ke paas wali deewar par tik kar neeche baith gaya aur ek cigarette sulgayi….
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Maine bahut galtiya ki hai, jisme mujhe maza bhi bahut aata hai par….par mera aisa manna hai ki Aradhna mere zindagi ki shayad sabse badi galti thi, mera matlab kya zaroorat thi mujhe Aradhna se pyar ke jhoothe vaade karne ki…meri zindagi toh thik-thak chal hee rahi thi….kitna acha hota ki yadi main Aradhna se kabhi mila hee na hota toh…par iski shuruat kaha se hui…8th semester me anchoring ke practice session se ya phhir kahi aur se…yaad aaya wo sala kallu kanghi chor ne mujhse ek baar shart lagaya tha ki yadi mujhme dum hai toh main ek maal pata ke dikhau…bas wahi se maine soch liya tha ki pataunga toh sirf Aradhna ko hee…mere aisa kahne ki do vazah thi…ek toh ye ki Aradhna college me new aayi thi aur bahut easy target thi…dusari vazah ye ki Aradhna ki wo kallu bhi lena chahta tha…isliye maine uske target par hee nishana saadh liya kyunki jab main kisi ki gand marta hoon toh khoon nikal deta hoon…matlab itna bada drama sirf ek shart ki vazah se hua tha…lekin galti meri hee thi…main chahta toh Aradhna ke sath apne rishte ko kabhi aage badhne hee nahi deta…main chahta toh Aradhna kabhi mere itne karib nahi aati…lekin mere andar hee choot ki bhookh sawar thi…uspar se itna ghamand ki maine Aradhna ki itni insult ki…sari galti meri thi…mujhe aisa nahi karna chahiye tha…maine hee Aradhna ko suicide ke liye mazboor kiya…uske baad jo mere sath hua wo toh sirf meri galti ka consequences the…jo maine jhela aur jhel kar nikal bhi aaya….


Main deewar ke sahare tik kar neeche baitha raha aur puri raat wahi baithe-baithe Aradhna ko niharta raha…wo aaj bhi waisi dikhti thi…jaisa ki pahle dikhti thi…waha neeche baithe-baithe main ghanto Aradhna ko ghoorta raha aur isi dauran beech me mujhe neend aa gayi…subah jab meri neend khuli toh Aradhna waha nahi thi….shayad wo chali gayi thi… maine deewar par mere dwara banaye gaye calendar me aaj ki taarikh par gola mara aur taiyar hokar Ganga-Jamuna jaane ke liye nikal gaya…kyunki kal raat ko Daddu ne mujhe call karke ye kaha tha ki main aakar guns dekh loon….


Main apne room se bahar nikla aur darwaja lock karke jaise hee peeche palta mujhe saamne Aradhna khadi dikh gayi…jo is samay kafi gusse me dikh rahi thi....maine aav na dekha taav aur turant peeche mudkar bhag khada hua…

“bhag le beta…atma gusse me lag rahi hai…peeche wali boundary kood ke khisak le…”
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Maine aisa hee kiya aur peeche wali boundary koodkar…waha se khisak liya…ab kyunki mujhe Ganga-jamuna jana tha aur paidal main itni door ja nahi sakta tha…isliye maine ek auto pakda aur ek side me chup-chap baithkar Madhulika ke bare me sochane laga….

Auto me driver ke aalawa is samay main aur ek Buddha tha….auto driver 30-32 saal ka raha hoga…lekin tha BC full tharki….jaha bhi sadak par ladkiyo ko dekhta…phhir chahe wo dusari side me hee kyun na chal rahi ho…auto rok kar un sabse puchhta ki kaha chalogi….yaha chalogi….waha chalogi…..ab bechari ladkiya koyi jawab nahi de rahi thi…isliye uski himmat badhte gayi….ab wo jaha ladkiyo dekhta wahi pel ke horn bajane lagta….auto wale ke baar-baar auto rokne…ladkiyo par chillane aur unhe dekh kar horn bajane ke karan mera concentration bigad raha tha….upar se mere side me baitha budhau jo ab tak shant baitha tha…wo bhi us auto wale ke sath shamil ho gaya aur haste hue bola….

“aahha…dekho toh kaise gand pasar-pasar kar chal rahi hai. mann karta hai dauda-dauda chodu”

Phhir jab ek ladki us budhau ke bagal se pass hui toh wo use ‘janu’ bolkar chillaya…..apne isi chhiltayi ko continue karte hue auto wale ne chup-chap jaa rahi ek ladki ko dekhkar auto roka…aur us-se bola…

“condom nagar chalogi kya…condom nagar….”

Jiske jawab me wo ladki kuch nahi boli…aur bina kuch bole aage badh gayi…jispar mere bagal me baitha budhau auto se apni garden nikal kar chillaya….

“oye janu…chal na…condom nagar…”

Mujhe koyi fark nahi padta ki wo dono kiske sath kya kar rahe the…lekin unki is harqat ke karan main bahut disturb ho raha tha aur jab main jitna disturb hota hoon tab main utna hee gussa hota hoon…upar se frustrated toh main hoon hee…maine auto rukwaya aur auto se utar kar pahle budhau ko kheechkar ek hath diya aur phhir ek laat auto wale ke seedhe jabde me mara….jisase wo dusari taraf palti markar gir gaya…

“Maadharchod…aise auto chalata hai…is-se acha toh titanic wala ship chalaya raha…”

“hath kaise lagaya be…teri bhain cho…”bolkar gusse se wo utha aur ghoom kar mere paas aaya….maine turant katta nikala aur uske sar par taan diya….

“peeche chal be randi ki aulaad, jaha hai wahi khada rah warna gand me goli marunga toh gand band ho jayegi….teri chachi ka pond…bhosdiwale.teri maa ne kutte se chudwaya tha kya jo tujh jaisa kutta paida hua”

Meri gaaliya sunkar autowala mujhe jaan se marna chahta tha par mere hath me gun dekhkar Auto wala jaha tha wahi rook gaya…aur gun apne upar dekh shant hokar sirf gun ko dekhne laga…waha aas-paas aur bhi log the aur sabki nazar mujhpar tiki hui thi….maine auto wale ko waha se chup-chap khisakne ke liye kaha, actually kaha nahi bas katta ghumakar ekdum role me waha se jaane ka ishara kiya aur uske jaane ke baad phhir ek dusare auto me baithkar waha se Ganga-jamuna ke liye ravana ho gaya….sale ye mujhe chodna sikhayenge.
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Mujhe pata nahi ki Ganga-jamuna aate hee mujhe kya ho jata hai…kyun main is tarah ki gundo wali harqate karne lagta hoon…mana ki main acting karne me mahir hoon lekin itni real acting…? wo bhi ek gunde ki…? mujhe ye toh maloom rahta hai ki main kya kar raha hoon lekin mujhe yaha Ganga-jamuna me aisa lagta hai ki jaise mere sharir me main nahi balki koyi aur hai….jaise kisi ne meri body se aatma exchange kar di ho….phhir…main…main nahi rahta…mera mujhpar koyi control nahi rahta…sabkuch mujhe aisa lagta hai jaise ki scripted ho…jaise ki ye sab mujhe pahle se pata hai ki kya hone wala hai…jaise ki ye sab pahle bhi ho chuka hai…

“ To me…present seems like past and past like future….confused ? well me too”cigarette jalate hue maine khud se bola “but I’m enjoying it now”

Aaj main direct Madhulika ke baap ke paas gaya aur mujhe dekhte hee wo ummid ke viparit khush hua…jisase main soch me pad gaya ki kya ye sach me khush hai ya meri tarah acting kar raha hai….

“kyun be dalle…itna muskura kyun raha hai….”

“kya babu…maine toh socha tha ki aap us din ke paisa nahi doge…lekin aapne toh 2000  diye the….”

“kyun be budhau…tune toh kaha tha ki wo teri biwi hai…lekin jab maine aas-paas logo se pucha toh unhone kaha ki Madhulika teri biwi nahi balki teri beti hai…. apni beti ki dalali karta hai tu…bhadwe”

“roji-roti ka sawal hai…sahib…Daddu is ilaake me kisi ko iske aalawa koyi aur dhandha karne hee nahi deta….ye chay ka thela toh customer se baat-chit karne vaste hai…kya kahte hai angrezi me ise….aaffice…ye mera aaffice hai…”

“Madhulika hai kya…andar…”

“haan malik…jayiye…”

“mujhse pahle aaj koyi aaya toh nahi tha…”

“itni subah-subah kaun aayega…aap aaj ke pahle customer ho….”

“aaj paise nahi dunga…. Samjha…isliye apni beti ko paise ke liye…pareshan mat karna….” 
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Maine aaj bhi wahi raasta liya ,jis raaste se wo us din mujhe le gaya tha…jo seedhe Madhulika ke ghar ke peeche milta tha…andar aane ke baad main seedhe us room me gaya jaha charpayi rakhi hui thi….main charpayi me baitha aur Madhulika bhi mere bagal me baithi….

“itne din kaha the aap…”mere hath ko sahlate hue Madhulika puchhi….

“aurat chahe randi hee kyun na ho...be-matlab ke sawal puchh kar hee rahegi…tujhe kya zaroorat hai ye sawal puchhne ki……kya tu yaha ki ekmatra randi hai…jo main sirf tere paas hee aaunga….apne kaam se kaam rakh…aur chal thook ke choos…tu ek rakhail hai aur rakhail hee rah…wo chutiye aur hote honge jo apna dimag lund me lekar ghoomte hai aur tum jaisi chhinaro ki meethi-meethi baato me aakar apna sab kuch luta dete hai…main wo hoon jo tum logo ka sab kuch loot dunga…isliye mujhe apni hoshiyari mat dikha…sirf choot dikha…”

Meri jali-kati baat sunkar Madhulika apna daant peeskar rah gayi…wo mujhe shayad us waqt jaan se marna chah rahi hogi…ye andaza maine laga liya kyunki aksar mere aas-paas rahne wale log yahi chahte hai…Madhulika ne mere katte ki taraf bhi ek nazar mari…jo maine uski bistar par rakh diya tha…aur jab wo meri jali – kati sunkar katte ki taraf dekhne lagi toh thodi der ke liye main dar gaya…

“dar mat…katta khali hai…sale fattu…”
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Main bistar par hee neeche pair latka kar baitha raha…Madhulika neeche zameen par baithi aur meri pant utarne lagi…pahle usne belt nikala aur phhir mere pant ki button kholkar mere pant ko thoda neeche khiska di….maine uske sar ko peeche se pakda aur uske face ko apne underwear ke upar ragadne laga….shuru me toh usne koyi virodh nahi kiya lekin phhir thodi der ke baad wo apna chehra waha se hatane ki koshish karne lagi…lekin maine uska sar apne dono hatho se daboch rakha tha…isliye wo chhoot pane me naqam rahi….wo mujhe maar bhi rahi thi…lekin main uska sar pakad kar uska chehra apni underwear me ragadta hee raha.
“harami….”maine jab uska sar chhoda toh wo apna daant peeskar mujhe boli aur wahi zameen par lambi-lambi saans lete hue let gayi….

“madarchod, lund se daba kar mar dalunga…”

Maine neeche jhuk kar uski saree pakdi aur jor-jor se kheechne laga….jiske karan uski saree ka thoda sa hee bhag uske jisme se nikalne ke baad fat gaya….maine apne shirt ke jeb se ek hazar ka patta nikal kar uske muh me feka aur phhir se uski saree pakad kar kheechne laga...kyunki mujhe maloom tha ki ek randi afterall sirf paiso ki bhookhi hoti hai…paise ke liye toh wo ek jaanwar se bhi chudwa sakti hai….bistar se uthkar main bhi zameen me Madhulika ke upar let gaya….

“aaj mere se pahle koyi aaya tha….”

“nahi…”mere dwara feke gaye hazar ke note ko uthakar side me rakhkar Madhulika ne jawab diya….

“tune brush kiya hai…”

“haan…”bolkar mere peeth me wo apne hath ferne lagi….

Madhulika ka bas itna bolna tha ki main uske hontho ko choosne laga…. Par humara kissing scene successful nahi ho pa raha tha…kyunki Madhulika beech me baar-baar apna jeebh le aa rahi thi….

“lawda nahi choos rahi hai tu…honth choos rahi hai…”bolte hue maine uski choot ke upar hath rakha aur upar se hee sahlane laga…

Main uski taraf dekh kar bahut der tak uski choot ko sahlata raha aur phhir uski bachi-kuchi saree ko upar kiya….usne aaj bhi underwear nahi pahani hui thi….

“tu underwear kyun nahi pahanti…”

“chaddi…? ”

“hmm…”uski choot ko lagatar masalte hue maine kaha….

“jab din me 5-6 baar utarna hee hai toh ,chaddi pahan kar kya fayda….”

“chal phhir, ghoom ja….”Madhulika ke upar se uthkar maine kaha….

Madhulika ne saree…blouse utar kar wahi ek kinare rakh di aur aur phhir apni taang faila kar let gayi…..

“tel waha upar rakha hai….”

“aaj bina tel ke…”

“dard hoga….”

“toh kya aise hee main tujhe hazaro rupaye deta hoon…taaki tujhe pata bhi na chale…? meri lund ki mauzoodagi ka tujhe kuch toh ahsaas hona chahiye…kyunki afterall main mahan, mera lund mahan ”

“mujhe nahi aapko dard hoga….baad me…”

“ wo main sah lunga….”kahte hue maine uski gand ko failaya aur apna lund uske gand par rakhkar dhakka mara….

“tel laga ke chodo na….please”

“chal be Sali…”kahkar maine apne lund par aur jor lagaya jis-se mera pura lund uski gand me dhas gaya aur tabhi mujhe aisa laga jaise koyi chiz mere lund ko jakad rahi thi… par thodi der baad jab maine physics ka concept lagaya toh mujhe samajh aa gaya ki ye sab Madhulika ke dwara apni gand tight karne ka nateeza hai….

Mera pura lund uski gand ke andar dastak de chukka tha lekin phhir bhi main jabran apne lund ko aur andar thelne ki koshish kar raha tha….maine Madhulika ka dono hath uski kamar par rakhkar apne ek hath se pakad liya aur apna lund uski gand se bahar nikal kar condom utar ke fek diya….maine ab condom ke bina lund uski gand ke muhane par rakha aur jaise hee maine apna lund uski gand me dala wo apna sar aadha ghuma kar apna hath chhudane ki nakam koshish karne lagi….

“pitaji ne kaha hai ki bina condom ke kisi ko bhi chodne na du….wo kahte hai ki ye saale randi baaz…awara kutte hote hai….pata nahi kaha-kaha ghusate rahte hai….”

“kya kabhi tune kisi kutte ko kutiya ko chodte waqt condom lagate hue dekha hai….”Madhulika ko chodte hue uske pichhawade par pinch karte hue main bola…”mujhe tere bare me ye toh pata hai ki tu is dhandhe me kaise aayi…lekin Sali randi…tu itni sharif dikhti nahi… randi ban-ne se pahle bhi tune kisi ka lawda liya raha hoga….let me guess…apne mohalle ke kisi ladke ka…ya phhir…mohalle ke kisi aadmi ka…? ya phhir kisi buddhe ka ...yaaa phhir kisi jaanwar kar”

“apne pitaji kaaaa….”

“saaaaach….”Madhulika ko chodte hue main beech me ruka…. “sala, incest lover”

“ meeeeri..meri maa jab bimar hui tooo..ooh….pita ji ne maa ke samne mujhe nanga karke choda tha....main cheekhti rahi…chillati rahi…lekin meri madad karne koyi nahi aaya….bhagwan bhi nahi…”

“at the end, god will not help you…trust me, I have seen the future”bolte hue maine uska hath chhod diya…

“kya…”apne dono hath zameen par rakh kar uthne ki koshish karte hue boli… 

“mujhe kuch samajh nahi aaya…”

“chup chap leti rah….raand” Madhulika ko wapas neeche dhakel kar main bola “aur main bol raha tha ki bhagwan koyi madad nahi karta…wo ab tang ho chuka hai insano se…insaan use irritate karte hai….isiliye ab bhagwan insano ki madad nahi karte…wo toh bas ab insano ko khatm karne ke firaq me hai…”

“neeche farsh par sex karne se baad me sharir bahut dukhta hai…aap bahut bhari ho…”

“ok…chal uth…aur bistar par jakar ghodi ban ja….”


Abki baar maine Madhulika ko uthne diya.Madhulika uthi aur bistar par ghodi bankar apne chutado ko hilane lagi, mano wo mujhe bula rahi ho….

“Daddu ko kabhi police pakad kar nahi le gayi….”uske peeche jakar uske chutado ko sahlate hue maine puchha

“abhi kuch mahine pahle le gayi thi…jab usne yaha ke purv vidhayak ko dhamki di thi…”

“thank you….”uski choot par apna lund rakhte hue khushi se maine kaha“toh wo dukan wala sahi kah raha tha…news confirmed…tune jo kuch bhi us din Daddu ke bare me bataya tha use us dukan wale ne confirm kiya aur yaha ke Ex-MLA se Daddu ke lafde ke baare me jo us dukan wale ne bataya tha, use tune confirm kiya….L.H.S. = R.H.S. , hence proved…”
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Apni bhookh shant karne ke baad main bistar se utha aur apne kapde pahan-ne laga….Madhulika bistar par hee leti hui thi aur meri taraf hee dekhe ja rahi thi….uska yun meri taraf dekhna mujhe disturb kar raha tha aur pasand toh bilkul bhi nahi aa raha tha…jispar pahle toh maine kuch nahi kaha lekin jab wo mujhe aise hee dekhti rahi toh main irritate hokar bola…

“aise kya dekh rahi hai be…tum randiyo ko main ache se janta hoon…aise hee look de-dekar logo ko apne jaal me fasti ho aur unka sab kuch lootkar unka ghar tabah kar deti ho…lekin jaisa ki maine pahle bhi kaha hai ki main un chutiyo ki tarah nahi hoon..”apna belt kaste hue main bola…jise sunkar Madhulika hasne lagi….

“bahut ki pant utari hai maine, saheb…aur pant ke sath-sath unke chehre se unka naqab bhi…aur meri baat mano toh ab aap yaha mat aao…warna loot kar hee jaoge…aap ye bolto ho ki main aapka kuch nahi loot paungi…par jitni baar aap yaha aaye utni baar aap sirf lut kar gaye hai, loot kuch nahi paye”

“ye hazar-do hazar…huh..ye hazar-do hazar mere liye koyi mayne nahi rakhte aur aaj kal toh bilkul bhi nahi”

“ye toh abhi shuruat hai...waqt ke sath-sath ye mulaqat bhi badhegi aur ye hazar ka aakda bhi….maine bade-bade mahapursho ko yaha nanga hote hue dekha hai toh phhir aap kya chiz ho….”

“main yugpurush hoon…aur kyunki mera sathi Physics hai isliye mujhe duniya ki koyi taqat nahi hara sakti aur is mind game toh bilkul bhi nahi… tum log bas thoda intezaar karo, Ganga-Jamuna me rahne wali har ek randi ki gand laal nahi ki toh mera name bhi Shri Arman nahi….i mean Shri Arman 3.0” apne kapde pahan kar maine goggle lagaya aur cigarette jalakar uska dhua Madhulika ke muh me fek kar bola… 

“tujhe andaza bhi nahi ki apne aap ko sahi sabit karne ke liye aur apna badla lene ke liye main kitna neeche gir sakta hoon…. mere liye toh physics bhi apna law badal deta hai… in short, I’m that dog who will bite everyone…see you soon…ache se gand marwana…bye”

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Chapter-16: Recall-1/The Breakup Show

Chapter-16: Recall-1/The Breakup Show

Madhulika se vida lekar main seedhe Daddu ke yaha pahucha… aaj Daddu ke shagirdo ne mujhe ache se bithaya aur chay-pani ke liye bhi puchha…Daddu waise toh raat ke samay hee Itwari me aata hai, lekin thodi jaanch-padtal ke baad mujhe ye maloom hua tha ki subah 10 baje ke pahle bhi Daddu Ganga-Jamuna ka ek round marta hai aur ye sach bhi nikla kyunki Daddu is samay apne hee adde par Ajmeri bai ke sath busy tha…isliye main waha Daddu ke jhat jaise cabin me baith kar cigarette par cigarette peeta raha….lekin Daddu tha ki Ajmeri ko chhodne ka name hee nahi le raha tha….maine ek aur cigarette muh me fasayi aur use chabate hue khud se bola….

“sala kaun si goli khata hai be…jo itni der se nikal hee nahi raha….puchhna padega, Vandana Rathi ko wahi goli khakar chodunga”

Maine waha aas-paas mauzood uske pantaro se kaha ki wo jakar Daddu ko mera messege de…tab unme se ek bola ki yadi unhone Daddu ko disturb kiya toh wo unhe jaan se mar dega… unke pantaro ne ye bhi kaha ki last time jab Daddu ,Ajmeri ke sath tha toh pure char ghante tak andar hee raha tha….sala Viagra-baz….par meri kismat achi thi…mujhe waha sirf ek ghanta hee Daddu ke liye wait karna pada….ek ghante baad Daddu aur Ajmeri dono sath me nikle….Daddu ke hath me katta tha toh uska dusra hath Ajmeri bai ke pichhwade me tha….undono ko dekh main waha baitha raha jise Daddu apna office bolta tha…jiske baad Daddu ne mujhe dekha aur Daddu ke sath Ajmeri bai bhi waha us office me aayi…Daddu table ke us paar main chair me baitha aur Ajmeri bai table ke is paar mere bagal me rakhi chair par sawar hui….

“light on kar be…”Daddu ne aawaz mari aur uske aawaz marte hee jaha hum log baithe the waha ki light chalu ho gayi… 

“kyun ladke…us din ke baad dikha nahi kothe par…us din toh bahut badi-badi baate kar raha tha…”mere hath par apna hath rakhte hue Ajmeri boli…

“chhat par koodte waqt chot lag gayi thi...”

“chhat ko toh chhod deta…”haste hue Ajmeri boli…

“nice one… par maine koodte hue kaha…aapne shayad kuch aur samjha” 

“tu meri bare me mere hee area me puchh-tachh kar raha hai…tune mujhe chutiya samajh rakha hai kya…”mere aur baby face Ajmeri Bai ke beech ke conversation ko khatm karte hue Daddu bola…

“chutiya nahi samajhdar samajhata hu…isiliye socha ki aap samajh jaoge…main aapke sath gun smuggling kar raha hoon…toh thoda bahut toh puchh-tachh karna mangta hai ki nahi….? waise us din aapne jin do aadmi ko mera peechha karne ke liye chhoda tha….unhe bol dena ki main waha nahi rahta ,jis ghar me main ghusa tha…wo toh unhe bhatkane ke liye main ghusa tha…waise bhi meri party ka main dealer main nahi hoon main toh bas broker hoon… aap bas ye samajh lo ki aise hee do number ke dhandhe se mera guzara chalta hai…”

“chutiye sale…par unhone toh kaha tha ki tu waha se wapas hee nahi nikla…”

“main bhagte hue aage se ghusa aur bhagte hue peeche se nikal gaya…guns kab tak aa jayege…”

“main tere ko phone karunga…”

“no problem…by the way apun aapke vaste kuch laya hai…”ek packet table par rakhte hue maine kaha… 

“kya hai iske andar…”

“new phone…”Ajmeri bai ki taraf muskura kar dekhte hue maine kaha “wo bhi seal…packed…jiske badle me mujhe sirf itna chahiye ki mera maal ek mahine ke andar mujhe mil jaye…jiske baad main yaha mauzood har ek shaks ko ek mobile gift karunga…even Ajmeri bai ko bhi…”


Itne me Daddu ke aadmi ek shaks ko jabran ghaseet-te hue utha kar waha laye aur Daddu ko bahar bulakar us shaks ko marne lage…Daddu ne apne aadmiyo ko use wahi andar cabin me lane ke liye kaha….shayad wo mujhpar apna raub jhadna chahta tha…maine us shaks ko dekha…wo meri umra ka hee tha…ya phhir mujhse kuch saal thoda bada raha hoga…uske andar aate hee Daddu ne us par katta taan diya aur bola

“kyun be…tujhe samajh nahi aata kya…bola na ki teri behan Ajmeri bai ke kothe par dhandha karegi…uska college kal se band…ab uski class kal se Ajmeri bai ke kothe par lagegi…aur kal se tu apni behan ka dalal kahlayega…”

“mujhe maaf kar do Daddu bhai…wo meri behan hai…”rote hue Daddu ke pair pakad kar wo gidgidane laga…

“wo teri behan hee hai…biwi toh nahi hai na…wo kya hai ki teri behan bilkul seal packed hai…is mobile ki tarah…isliye uska rate bahut jyada rahega….aur Ajmeri bai ke kothe par bahut kam khush naseeb ladkiyo ko kaam karne ka mauka milta hai…”

“lekin Daddu bhai…”

“Madarchod…samajh nahi aata kya…ek baar me….”ek laat use markar Daddu bola 

“tu apne aap hee apni behan ko Ajmeri bai ke kothe par chhod ja…warna tere pure khandan ko randi bana kar Ajmeri bai ke kothe par dhandha karwaunga…chal nikal sale yaha se ab…”

Maine ye sab kuch dekha , ye sab mere saamne hee hua…jaha ek taqatwar aadmi ne ek kamzor ko dhamki di thi… us pure samay main yahi sochta raha ki Main us aadmi ki help kar sakta hoon…main koyi tikdam lagakar use aur uski behan ko bacha sakta hoon…aisa meri antaratma ne mujhse kaha….par isi ke sath ek aur sawal jo meri antaratma ne mere saamne rakha ki…why should I….. kya lena-dena mujhe us anjaan shaks ki behan se… kaun sa lawda yadi main use bacha lunga toh uski bahan mujhse chudwayegi…. Hat BC , do-do antaratma….. 
.

filhal toh maine us matter me koyi ungali nahi ki aur seedhe Colony ke liye ravana hua...Apne flat pahuchkar Maine jaise hee main gate khola mujhe farsh par ek notice dikhayi diya…par actual me wo koyi notice nahi tha…balki electricity bill tha…maine electricity bill ko dekha aur modkar dustbin me nishana lagane laga…..

“sala, miss ho gaya….? par kaise…”chaukte hue maine phhir se us bill ko uthaya aur dustbin se thodi door jakar dustbin par phhir se nishana lagaya….

“phhir se miss…ye kaise mumkin hai…”

Maine phhir se bill uthaya aur use modkar ek-do mantra jo mujhe school time ke yaad the unhe bolkar dustbin me nishana lagakar feka…lekin main is baar bhi chook gaya tha…jisase khisiya kar maine decide kiya ki jab tak ye bill dustbin me nahi jayega...main dustbin me nishana lagata hee rahunga…phhir chahe subah hee kyun na ho jaye…maine apna sara hunar ,sari mehnat laga di tab jakar 31st time me bill dustbin me goal hua aur Dustbin me goal marne ke baad maine apni khushi ka izhar karne ke liye hawa me hath uthaya hee tha ki mujhe kisi ne peechhe se pakda. Pakda kya…balki daboch liya…jiske karan main jhijhak utha aur peechhe palat kar dekha….

“hello sir…”

“hell..O…hello”

“how are you, sir….”apni pakad mazboot banate hue Aradhna ne puchha…

“f..f..faa….fine…how..how are you…Aradhana”kanpte hue maine jawab diya….

“aap mujhse itna darte kyun ho…pahle toh aap aise nahi the…kya aap ab badal chuke ho….”

“main aur dar….m..m…main kaha…haahaaaa”

“you love me, right…”

“ofcourse…not…I mean why not”Aradhna ke changul se chhootne ki koshish karte hue maine kaha…lekin usne itni mazbooti se mujhe pakad rakha tha ki main uske changul se chhoot tak nahi paa raha tha….
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“sir, aapko yaad hai…college time pe kaise aap mujhe bure ladko se bachaya karte the…”

“ yaad… ofcourse yaad hai…”Aradhna ki pakad se chhootne ki koshish karte hue maine kaha…lekin jab abki baar bhi main nakam raha toh main bola…“Janeman,ab kya tum mujhe chhodogi…mujhe bathroom jaana hai…”

“thik hai”

“jaha power kaam na aaye waha pyar kaam aata hai…”

Aradhna ke chhodne ke baad…main jaldi se bhagkar bathroom me ghusa aur bathroom ka gate andar se band kar liya….

“iski maa ka…abey ye kya tha…wo bhootni aaj kaise aa gayi…pahle toh kuch din ka gap lekar aati thi…kahi main sapna toh nahi dekh raha…let me check…”

“lawda check…real hai…”

“tujhe kaise pata…”

“yakin nahi toh apna sar patak ke dekh le…ya phhir bathroom me susu kar le…yadi sapna hoga toh bistar me geelepan ki vazah se teri neend khul jayegi…jaise bachpan me hota tha…remember”

“great idea… “

“welcome ”
.

Maine apne pant ki zib kholi aur susu karte hue bathroom me Arun ka name likhne laga…. ye raha…A… R… U… lekin Arun ka pura name likhne se pahle hee mera tank khali ho gaya aur main ab bhi wahi tha…

“ye haqiqat hai…”apne lund par jor dete hue maine kaha…. “anyway…main Arun ka name complete zaroor karunga…”

Maine apne pet me thoda aur bal lagaya aur phhir Arun ka name complete karke bathroom me hee khade-khade sochne laga ki ab kya karu….Aradhna ko yaha se kaise rafa-dafa karu…ye toh Sali gale hee pad gayi…ab ise kaun samjhaye ki is duniya me sabse jyada nafrat main Gautam ke baad isi se karta hoon…Sali dehati kahi ki…khamkha har baar mere peechhe pad jati hai….kya karu…kya karu…

“thik waisa hee kar jaisa ki tune college time me kiya tha…Aradhna se break up karne ke dauran…”Version 2.0 ne apni salah mujhe di…

“mujhe thik se kuch yaad nahi…aajkal meri power thodi kam ho gayi hai…bole toh mera sixth sense aajkal kaam nahi kar raha…mujhe toh ye tak nahi maloom ki aaj ki taarikh kaun si hai…jabki deewar bar banaye gaye calendar me maine subah hee aaj ki taarikh par gola mara tha”

“main help karu…”

“hmm…”

“aankhe band kar…”

“aankh band karu…par kyun…”

“flashback baby…flashback… ab kya aankh kholkar flashback me jayega”

“oh k…”


maine apni aankh band ki aur aankh band karte hee mujhe sabse pahle mera college dikhayi diya…badhiya bada sa, behatareen sa… jaha maine apni zindagi ke sabse behtareen char saal guzare the ya phhir yun kah lijiye ki jaha maine apni zindagi ke sabse bekar char saal guzare the… maine dekha ki waha college ke saamne kuch jhat barabar launde the , jo parking me khade hokar ladkiyo ko line maar rahe the….

“2.0, please, change the location…I hate my college”

aur mere aisa bolte hee mera dimag college se girls hostel ki taraf jaane wali sadak par daudne laga...ye sab bahut speed ke sath ho raha tha matlab bahut hee tez gati ke sath mera dimag girls hostel wali sadak par dauda aur aakhir me Girls hostel ke bahar jakar rook gaya aur maine dekha ki main toh waha par pahle se hee khada tha lekin main toh yaha tha… maine do-do antaratma ka experience kuch der pahle hee liya tha par ab do-do Arman…ye kaise mumkin hai ? main toh yaha peechhe khada hoon , phhir waha hostel ke gate ke saamne mujh jaisa dikhne wala insaan kaun hai…. kahi wo Gautam toh nahi, jo mask lagakar aaya ho, ya phhir Arun…

“abey jhat, brain ke through tu flashback me hai… time travel me nahi… jaha tu Arman-1 ke sharir me ghus jata hai… kya tujhe flashback aur time-travel ke beech ka difference nahi maloom ? flashback me tu sirf dekh sakta hai, sun sakta hai.. ro sakta hai aur ye sab sirf tujh tak simit rahega… bakiyo ko tere presence ka aabhas tak nahi hoga… ye mera time tha aur jo tere saamne Arman khada hai wo 2.0 hai..yaani ki main..”

“par tu toh yaha mere saamne hai”

“abey gandul… ye flashback hai.. jab log kisi ko apne beeti yaado ke baare me batate hai tab bhi toh wo dono jagah hote hai… ab samjha kuch.. khud ko Physics-putra kahta hai aur itna nahi maloom… jaa back to back dus baar mutth markar mar ja kahi..”

“bas kar be aur kitni insult karega show shuru kiya jaye”


Toh waha…. Girls hostel ke bahar main khada tha aur Aradhna ka besabri se intezaar kar raha tha….abhi 6:30 baje the aur raat 7 baje tak hee ladkiyo ko bahar aane-jane ki permission thi…waise kahne ko toh wo flashback tha par main mahsoos kar sakta tha ki waha khada Arman kya mahsoos kar raha hai…kyunki wo main hee tha…

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Aradhna ko ab apni girl friend bolne me mujhe kuchh khas achchha nahi lagta tha .ek to wo average ladki thi,upar se use main kayi baar apne dosto ke room me lejakar chod chuka tha...isliye ab uspar mujhe koyi interest nahi tha ,halanki uski badi-badi chutado me ab bhi itna dam tha ki wo mera lawda khada kar de...lekin ab sala mood nahi hota tha ,Aradhna ke sath wo sab karne ko....aur waise bhi jiski girl friend Esha jaisi ladki ban jaye toh phhir Aradhna jaisi ek average gaanv ki ladki ke sath relationship banakar kaun apni durgati karaye....isliye main us waqt Aradhna se milne gaya tha....halaki us waqt mujhe Aradhna se sahanubhuti toh ho rahi thi ki usko bura lagega...lekin main kar bhi kya sakta tha...main nahi chahta tha ki kisi din jab main college me Esha ke sath kahi ghoom raha hoon toh Aradhna waha aaye aur bole ki “kal raat ki chudai ka asar abhi tak hai…sir, please aisa mat choda karo....” isliye main aaj idhar sab kuchh khatam karne aaya tha…lekin mujhe us waqt kya pata tha ki sabkuch wakayi me khatm ho jayega….
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Mera aisa manna tha ki Aradhna mujhse naraz hogi ,mujhpar cheekhegi,chillayegi...yaha tak ki gusse me hath bhi utha sakti hai isliye Aradhna ko hostel se bahar aate dekh maine apne hatho ko kisi bhi achanak hamle se nipatne ke liye taiyar kar liya tha.

"kya hua sir, itni raat ko...kya vichar hai...aapka"hamesha ki tarah chudne ke mood me aate hue Aradhna boli... Sali randi..Madarchod

"bas aise hee..."(thode der ruk hawasi, aisa lawda ghusaunga ki zindagi bhar dard nahi jayega)

"phhir kahiye...kyun kast kiya yaha tak aane ka..."

"mujhe kuchh kahna hai tere ko..."

"toh nervous kyun ho rahe ho...aap bhi nervous hote ho kya.."mera mazak udate hue Aradhna hasi...
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Update-56

Quote:
"phhir kahiye...kyun kast kiya yaha tak aane ka..."

"mujhe kuchh kahna hai tere ko..."

"toh nervous kyun ho rahe ho...aap bhi nervous hote ho kya.."mera mazak udate hue Aradhna hasi...

"main actually nervous nahi hoon, nervous hone ki acting kar raha hoon ,taki jo main aage kahne wala hoon, use sunkar tera dard kuchh kam ho aur main ye…ye…kahna chahta hoon ki main tujhse pyar nahi karta...wo sab to aise hee bas time pass karne ke liye maine ye sab natak kiya tha...."

Itna bolkar Maine socha ki abhich...bas abhich Aradhna royegi, mujhpar hath uthayegi...lekin usne waisa kuchh nahi kiya .ulta wo rone ki bajay aise hasne lagi jaise maine uski choot me gudgudi ki ho.....

"tu has kyun rahi hai...main sach bol raha hoon "

"mujhe yahi batane ke liye hostel se bahar bulaye ho..."Aradhna ne thode der ke liye apni hansi roki aur phhir hasne lagi.....

"hans le,mera kya hai...lekin main kuchh chize clear kar diye deta hoon...ab se na toh tu mujhe call karna aur na hee messege...waise bhi agar tu ye sab karna bhi chahegi to kar nahi payegi ,kyunki main kal hee apna number change kar dunga aur apna purana number hostel ke kisi launde ko de dunga...isliye soch-samajh kar hee messege karna..."

"hmmm...."ye sunkar Aradhna ki hansi abki ruk gayi...."main samjhi nahi kuch...aap kahna kya chahte ho..."

"main directly jo kahna chahta hoon,use indirectly hee samajh le na...tujhe hee fayda hoga..."

"matlab…"

"indirectly nahi samajhi na...toh phhir le, directly sun .maine tere door ke bhai kallu kanghichor se shart lagayi thi ki main tujhe pata ke chodunga...jisme main kamyaab raha. Lekin ab mera mann bhar gaya hai,isliye...aaj se hum kabhi nahi milenge aur yadi kabhi mile bhi toh baat nahi karenge aur yadi kabhi baat bhi karni padi to ,is baare me to bilkul bhi baat nahi karenge...."thode der ke liye main ruka ,kyunki jaise-jaise main bolte ja raha tha,Aradhna ki aankhe dheere-dheere badi hoti ja rahi thi...wo rona chahti thi,ya phhir kahe ki wo bas ro hee deti ,yadi main us waqt chup na hua hota toh....isliye main thodi der ke liye ruka aur jab mujhe yakin ho gaya ki ,Aradhna ab thoda normal ho gayi hai to maine aage bolna shuru kiya....

"maa kasam, Aradhna...main tujhse bilkul bhi pyar nahi karta.main kisi aur se pyar karta hoon, main tujhe uska name bhi batata lekin security reasons ki vazah se main tujhe uska naam nahi bataunga.main janta hoon ki tujhe bahut bura lag raha hoga aur lagna bhi chahiye… aakhir tune mujhse apni gand aise hee thodi marwayi hai ki main kisi aur ko dekh kar ya phhir sochkar mutth maru…lekin main kya karu....main mazboor hoon…waise bhi tujhe sochna chahiye tha ki mujh jaisa ladka college ki baki ladkiyo ko chhodkar tere peechhe kyun padega .main janta hoon ki main bahut bura kah raha hoon lekin mujhe is waqt bilkul bhi bura nahi lag raha hai ,jo is baat ki gavaah hai ki mere kaleje me tere liye zero point zero zero zero zero one(0.00001) ke barabar bhi koyi feeling nahi hai par main tujhe salah de sakta hoon… Google me jakar search karna ki 'how to forget ex-boyfriend'. Ummid hai,kuch kaam ki chiz mil jayegi...."bolkar main chup hua aur yaad karne laga ki aur kuchh bolna baki hai ya phhir khisku yaha se....

"ek aur baat....aaj ke baad kisi se bhi pange mat lena aur yadi koyi senior intro vagerah le toh shanti se de dena...kyunki ab main tujhe bachane nahi aane wala...ab chalta hoon.all the best..."

iske baad main waha ek second ke liye bhi nahi ruka aur wapas tez kadmo ke sath hostel ki taraf badha....kyunki main nahi chahta tha ki Aradhna mere peechhe aa jaye....

"Wow ! Aradhna ka matter to badi aasani se sulajh gaya....usne to koyi react hee nahi kiya. Mujhe aise hee ladkiya pasand hai,jo meri baat sune aur bas sune...koyi jawab ya sawal na kare...."
Aradhna se break up karke hostel ki taraf jaa rahe Arman ko maine aawaz di…use rokna chaha…taaki wo ruk jaye aur Aradhna se break up na kare… lekin ye flashback tha…koyi time travel nahi…jo main kuch kar sakta tha…afterall wo main hee toh tha…jisne abhi-abhi ek ladki ka dil dukhaya tha aur ek baar bhi palat kar Aradhna ko nahi dekha tha…lekin Aradhna …wo ab bhi wahi khadi thi aur mujhe hostel ki taraf jate hue dekhti rahi…wo waha bahut der tak khadi rahi…aur ant me jab uske hostel ke chaukidar ne use andar aane ke liye kaha toh usne apni nazar 2.0 se hatakar meri taraf dekha….yes… meri taraf dekha…matlab version 3.0 ki taraf dekha aur bahut tezi se daud kar mere paas aa gayi….

“kya sir…flashback….”

“what the….tu mujhe kaise dekh sakti hai…main toh yaha hoon hee nahi…”chauk kar peechhe hat-te hue maine kaha...aur turant apni aankh band kar li….

“thank god…”bathroom me apni aankh kholte hue lambi-lambi saanse bharkar maine kaha “ye Aradhna toh pagal kar degi mujhe…ye toh mere rom-rom me bas chuki hai…kya iska koyi ilaaz nahi hai…aise me toh ye mujhe suicide bhi nahi karne degi…”

Galti insaan ko ye dikhati hai ki usne kya galat kiya aur aage use kya nahi karna chahiye lekin shayad main ye kabhi samajh hee nahi paya tha…warna Nisha ke sath mera relation kabhi nahi banta aur na hee main Madhulika ke paas jata…mera matlab mujhe kya zaroorat hai Ganga-Jamuna jakar Daddu se koyi deal-veal karne ki…kya main koyi criminal hoon…ya phhir koyi aatankwadi hoon…. seriously main kya karunga un 100 guns ka aur main kyun kar raha hoon ye sab…mujhe chahiye ki main apne ghar jaun…gharwalo se maafi mangu aur jo salah maine us din Varun ke bade bhai ko di thi us salah ko main bhi apnau…


Quote:
…..aap ghar jao…competitive exams ki taiyari karo aur exam clear karke apni life track par le aao…this is the best you can do…
“yeah..this is the best I can do…”bathroom me jabran apne hath dhulte hue main bola…jabki main ek baar already apne hath-pair dhul chuka tha.

“bitch please…You’re Arman…Shri Arman…”

“ correct…main Arman hoon…Arman 3.0 na ki Arman 2.0…tujhe yani ki Version 2.0 ko zindagi ne sab diya tha…friends, girlfriends, paisa, power, family , talent…lekin tune sab kuch barbaad kar diya… lekin main aisa nahi karunga…main apne talent ka pura istemaal karunga…main abhi jakar Mathematics ke pure topics revision marunga aur phhir Thermodynamic padhna start kar dunga….”

“par bahar jo Aradhna hai…uska kya karega….”

“wo ab bahar nahi hogi…”

“tujhe kaise pata…”

“sixth sense… check kar le…yadi Aradhna abhi bahar dikh gayi toh main ek hafte tak nahi hilaunga….”

“done…”

“done…”


Main bahar aaya aur pure flat me Aradhna ko dhoondha lekin Aradhna kahi bhi nahi thi… that’s Arman-3 for you…..bitches 

Maine thermodynamics ka ebook khola aur syllabus ke according padhna shuru kar diya…shuru-shuru me jab main padhne baitha tha tab raat ke 10 baje the aur us samay meri andar energy peak par thi…lekin jaise-jaise samay beeta mera sar bhari hota chala gaya…aur maine raat ke 2 baje bahar ghoomne ka plan banaya….pahle toh maine do round river view colony ka lagaya lekin jab mera mood phhir bhi thik nahi hua toh main colony se bahar nikal kar NH-6 ki taraf daudte hue chala gaya….is samay mere paas mera katta bhi tha, isliye mujhe zara sa bhi dar nahi lag raha tha ki koyi mujhe kuch kar dega…. Main full bindas me NH-6 me night walking kar raha tha ki tabhi ek car bahut speed me aayi aur mere paas se guzar gayi…

“Maaadharchod….”us car wale ko maine kaha aur phhir samne thodi doori par ek ped ko dekh kar khud ko challenge kiya ki kya main us ped ko daudkar 8 seconds me paar kar sakta hoon ?

Maine khud ko challenge kiya aur khud hee challenge accept bhi kar liya…

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Chapter-17: Family, Friend and Basketball

“yeah…I did it…”us ped ko 8 seconds ke bheetar paar karne ke baad hafte hue maine kaha aur ghutno par hath rakhkar jhuk gaya taaki thakan jaldi jaye….aur tabhi door se aati hui ek car ne horn maarkar mujhe sadak se hatne ka sanket diya….

“Arman se panga…abhi batata hoon…”


Sadak se hatne ke bajay ulta main aur beech me khada ho gaya aur meri taraf aati hui car par maine gun taan di…
Jab main aisa kar raha tha toh mujhe yahi laga tha ki car wala ya car wali mere hath me gun dekhkar dar ke mare apni car rok dega…jispar main do-teen dialogues chipka kar use vida kar dunga…lekin jab se sadak ke beech-o-beech khada hokar maine gun us aati hui car ki taraf kiya tha tab se us car ki speed aur badh gayi thi….jisase meri fati aur maine fati me turant trigger daba diya…lekin trigger chalate waqt mera hath kanpa aur goli pata nahi BC kis disha me gayi….ab car ki speed aur bhi tez ho gayi thi,isliye maine jyada rolebazi na marte hue samne se hatna hee behtar samjha….. lekin maine aisa kiya bilkul bhi nahi balki iske ulat wahi beech sadak par khade hokar car ki taraf firing ki aur abki baar mera hath na kaanpe isliye apne dusare hath se maine jis hath me gun pakda hua tha , use pakad liya…. ab samajh aaya filmo me aise gun kyu pakadte hai, taaki nishana correct baithe…

Jab Mere dwara dusari bullet fire karne ke baad bhi Car meri oor badh hee rahi thi tabhi maine apni aankh band kar li , kyunki mujhe andaza ho chala tha ki ab ye car mujhe udane wali hai… main chahta toh waha se hatkar in sabko rok sakta tha…lekin main apne ego ke karan sadak ke beech-o-beech khada raha aur is karname ko anzaam de diya….

“kya main zinda hoon… ? ”apni dayi aankh dheere-dheere kholkar maine samne dekha aur khud se sawal kiya

“mujhe toh kuch nahi hua… kya mere andar koyi super power hai… ”apni dusari aankh bhi dheere-dheere kholkar maine khud se sawal kiya aur tabhi kisi ke dard se karahne ki aawaz mujhe sunayi di…maine apna rookh us aawaz ki taraf kiya….

“iski maa ka… ye kya kar diya maine… kya main itna strong hoon ki mujhse takra kar car ghoom gayi…”

Kuch der pahle Jis car ke saamne main khada tha, wo car ab highway se neeche ek ped se thuki hui thi aur uske andar baithe log dard se karah rahe the…. Main thodi der jaha khada tha, wahi khada raha aur phhir sochne laga ki actual me kya hua hoga…. 

“dusari Bullet maine car par chalayi thi jo seedhe jakar car me hee lagi aur car mere tak pahuch pati uske pahle hee car mere bagal se bayi taraf mudkar ek ped se takra gayi….. car wale ne mujhe nahi thokha…iske do karan ho sakte hai…pahla karan ye ki bullet ke Car se contact hone par driver dar gaya hoga aur usne aanan-fanan me Car dusari taraf ghuma di hogi…dusara karan ye ki bullet seedhe driver ko lagi hogi aur uske hath se car ka steering ghoom gaya hoga…. Chalkar dekhta hoon…”
.

Maine apna chehra roomal se bandha aur Katta apne hath me ghoomate hue ped se takra chuki us car ke paas pahucha… main bade role se katta ghuma raha tha , jiske karan ek baar toh katta mere hath se gir bhi chuka tha…anyway, Car ke andar total 5 log the aur sab launde hee the… jo nashe me full tunn the… waha car ke andar unke aas-paas beer ki kayi botal padi hui thi….kuch khali , toh kuch bhari hui aur kuch phooti hui…

“please don’t kill us…take the money or take whatever you want, whatever you like… but don’t kill us… please, please”un paanch ladko me se ek ne mujhse kaha….

“great idea… chalo tum sab apna-apna batua nikalo…”katta unpar taante hue maine kaha 

Jiske baad un sabne bina kisi rok-tok ke apna-apna batau nikala aur bahar fek diya….jiske baad maine un sabke batue se paise nikal kar batua unhe wapas kar diya… kyunki unme unke ATM card, PAN card wagerah the….

“main tum log ko ek shart me zinda chhodunga…” Car ke andar khidki se hath dalkar ek beer nikalte hue maine kaha “ jo-jo Taylor Swift I mean Taylor series ka formula bata dega uski jaan main baksha dunga….”

“itna bada….form..form…formula kaun batayega…”aage wali seat par baitha ek launda apni seat belt kholne ki koshish karte hue bola “wo toh humne third semester me padha tha…”

“tu engineering kar rela hai kya…”

“hum sab Mechanical Engineering ke students hai…. Aur apne dost ka birthday celebrate karke wapas ghar ja rahe the….”

“Engineering kar rahe ho... isliye jaan se nahi maar raha hoon… lekin ghar jakar Taylor Series ka formula yaad zaroor kar lena….kal main tum logo ke ghar aakar formula puchhunga”bolkar maine Car ke andar se ek aur beer ki botal uthayi aur waha se bhagkar wapas apne flat me aaya….

“ maza aa gaya BC…. Ab roz NH-6 me jaunga aur logo ko lootunga… jisme mera sath dega mera Katta… ”

“I am Arman, I have a Gun
I own this world, let’s begin the Fun….”


Room me Beer ki ek botal khali karne ke baad main chhat par pahucha aur net se Nagpur ke Ex-MLAs ki list nikalne lag gaya…. 

“Sidharth Singh Bairangi…. Ye raha mera bakra… yahi hai wo jis-se Daddu uncle ki bilkul nahi jamti… mujhe bas in dono ko bhidana hai. Taaki mera kaam aasan ho jaye… wait, par main ye sab kyun kar raha hoon… oh, got it…”muskurate hue maine mobile apne jeb me rakha aur phhir Vandana Rathi ki chhat ki taraf nazar dali….

“kya bolta hai Arman…ek baar phhir ho jaye…”

“bilkul nahi…last time wala bhool gaya kya… kaise kutto ke mafiq gheesat-gheesat kar R.Rathi ke flat se apne flat me aaya tha….”

“so what… Always Remember that A lion never stops after an unsuccessful hunt…”

“marwa ke hee rahega tu…”

“that’s two point zero for you…. My dear”

“chal phhir… ho jaye ek-ek jump… lekin helmet pahan ke…”

“sure…”
.

Maine apne sar me helmet lagaya aur apne flat se Vandana Rathi ke flat tak ki doori ko measure karte hue apna sar khujane laga I mean helmet khujane laga…. Main thoda peechhe gaya aur daudkar apne flat se ek jump liya…. Abki baar mujhe puri ummid thi ki main safal ho jaunga aur main safal ho bhi jata lekin meri jump is baar bhi thodi si kam pad gayi aur mere sar ke sath meri puri body deewar se takrayi aur deewar se takrane ke baad main pichhali baar ki tarah is baar bhi Vandana Rathi ke garden me gira… dard mujhe ab bhi ho raha tha lekin pichhali baar ki tulna me abki baar dard bahut kam tha…kyunki last time meri chhati E-5 ke chhat ke kinare se takrayi thi jabki baar aisa nahi hua tha… khair main thodi der tak wahi naram-naram ghas par aankh band kiye hue leta raha aur jab dard kuch normal hua toh aankh kholkar dono hath se apna helmet utara…. Lekin mere hath is waqt itna kaanp rahe the ki sar se helmet nikalna bhi mere liye mushkil ho raha tha…
.

Maine bahut mehnat ki helmet ko nikalne ki lekin jab maine helmet utara toh paya ki eka-ek subah ho gayi hai…subah nahi…actually dopahar ho gayi thi…par phhir jab maine waha pade-pade aas-paas gaur kiya toh paya ki actuyally abhi sham ka samay hai…time yahi kuch 4-5 baje honge…. Aur toh aur ye jagah wo nahi thi…jaha mujhe girna chahiye tha… ye jagah toh…. Ye jagah toh…. Mere ghar ke paas wala ground tha..mujhe abhi dhang se kuch dikh bhi nahi raha tha…mera matlab thodi der pahle mujhe sab kuch saaf dikhayi de raha tha… lekin ab sab kuch dhundhala-dhundhala dikhayi pad raha tha… upar se waha bahut shor-sharaba bhi ho raha tha... mujhe sab kuch dhundhala sa hee jaan pad raha tha ki mere kano me kisi ki aawaz padi...

"Arman, bach... wo bat lekar tujhe marne aa raha hai..."

Maine apni aankh ek baar band karke ahiste se apni aankho ko sahlaya aur phhir apni aankhe kholi….

“ab saaf dikhayi de raha hai…lekin ye kya…. koyi mujhe bat se marne wala hai… iski toh… ”bolkar maine apni aankhe band kar li… lekin jab kuch der tak mujhe kuch ahsaas nahi hua toh maine apni aankhe dobara kholi… 

“what the… fuck. Pahle Vandana Rathi ka flat , phhir ghar ke paas wala ground aur ab turant hee ek jhatke me main apne school ke basketball court me ? itni jaldi-jaldi scene kaise change ho raha hai…lagta hai past ka recap mode activate ho gaya hai…”
.

Main is samay apne school ke basketball court ke paas akele baitha hua tha aur thodi der tak main wahi baithakar apne aaju-baju dekhne laga ki koyi yaha bhi toh mujhe marne nahi aa raha hai aur jab thodi der tak waha koyi nahi aaya toh main waha se khada hua aur school ke main gate ki taraf chal pada….Mera irada abhi filhal school se bahar nikalne ka tha…lekin maine jaise hee school ke main gate se bahar jaane ke liye apna pair uthaya mera pair hawa me hee rook gaya…meri puri body jaise jam ho gaya ta… main apne sharir ka koyi bhi ang nahi hila pa raha tha…yaha tak ki apni ek ungali bhi nahi mujhe aisa laga jaise bhagwan ne mujhe statue bol diya ho aur us dauran jab mera pair hawa me atka hua tha tab…aasman ka rang bahut tezi se badalne laga…school ki deeware achanak se chhoti-badi ho rahi thi…waha school ke paas jitney bhi ghar ya dukane thi…sabme koyi na koyi changes ho hee rahe the…kisi ka color change hota toh kisi ka shape. sadak, school…waha bane ghar aur dukane sab kuch meri aankho ke saamne tezi se badal rahe the aur phhir eka-ek hawa me latka hua mera pair zameen me aaya par ab main school me nahi tha…ab main apne ghar me khada tha….

Chaukte hue main apne ghar ki deewaro ko dekhne laga ki kahi ye bhi badal rahi hai ya nahi… aur jab unme koyi parivartan nahi hua toh maine baki mahol pe dhyan diya…jis-se mujhe pata chala ki mere mummy-papa ke sath mera bhai saamne sofe par baitha hua hai aur main kisi mujrim ki bhaati unke saamne khada tha…jis-se mujhe ahsaas hua ki zaroor maine aaj ke date pe koyi kaand kiya hoga jiski peshi ghar par chal rahi hai… maine apne sar par apna hath firaya toh paya ki mere sar me patti bandhi hui hai… yani ki meri zaroor kisi se ladayi hui hogi… yaad aaya, wo ground me us ladke dwara mujhpar bat se hamla…..

“jawab dega… ya yun hee muh band kiye khada rahega….”Vipin bhaiya ne mujhse kaha…

“jawab kya dena hai…hum log match khel rahe the aapke dosto se. aur jab wo harne lage toh gaddari karne lage… jispar Varun ne aapke dosto ko gaddar kah diya aur aapke wo sand jaise dost Varun ko marne lage…aur beech-bachav me mujhe ye chot lag gayi…”

“tujhe hazar baar kaha hai ki Varun ke sath mat ghooma kar…lekin tu…”sofe se uthkar mere papa ne mujhe ek tamacha jad diya….

“teri maa ka…”mann hee mann me maine kaha aur chup-chap sah liya…

“ye aise hee sudhrega papa… kuch log iski tarah laat khane wale hee hote hai jine apne family ki izzat ki koyi parvah nahi hoti…”Vipin bhaiya ne kaha….

“Arman… tu kyun aisa karta hai… abhi pichhale hafte hee tere sar me chot lagi thi aur aaj phhir tune….”bolte-bolte meri maa ruk gayi… kyunki is dauran mere papa ne mere gaal par ek aur tamacha pel diya tha…

“teri maa ki maa ka…”dusara tamacha khane ke baad maine kaha…..lekin mann me

“dekh beta… Varun acha ladka nahi hai…uske sath mat ghooma kar… tu humari baat maan kyun nahi leta… teri sab ladayi uski vazah se hoti hai”

“mom… aapko pata hai, main pichhale kayi dino se soch raha tha ki Aisi kya vazah ho sakti hai… jiske karan aap sab Varun se itna nafrat karte ho… mera matlab Varun , Vipin bhaiya ke un sabhi langoor dosto se laakh guna acha hai…jinke sath baithkar Vipin bhaiya Government school ke peechhe cigarette peete hai… kabhi Vipin bhaiya ke dosto par gaur kiya hai…? unke dost bus stand me ladkiyo ko chhedte hai…unse gali khate hai aur gali khane ke baad daant dikha kar haste hai…atleast Varun aisa toh nahi karta. Papa aapko pata hai ki nahi par Varun bhaiya ki ek girlfriend hai… jiska name toh abhi mujhe yaad nahi par main aapko baad me bataunga… in dono ko maine apne hee ghar me kiss karte hue dekha hai… isliye mujhse nazar hatao aur apne idol bete ki fikra karo…”

“Vipin tu ye sab karta hai… aise logo ke sath ghoomta hai… “Vipin bhaiya ko jordar hadkate hue papa ne kaha aur main intezaar karne laga ki abhi…bas abhi jaise mujhe do thappad pade waisich papa Vipin bhaiya ke bhi gaal laal kar denge…. Lekin unhone Vipin bhaiya ko kuch nahi kiya… even thik dhang se fatkar tak nahi lagayi…. 

“mujhe do diya hai…bhaiya ko kam se kam ek toh banta hai papa”

“tu bilkul chup rah aur Vipendra ye sab karta hai, iska matlab ye nahi ki tu bhi ye sab karega….samjha…aaj ke baad yadi tu mujhe Varun ke sath dikha toh soch lena Arman…puri 206 haddiya tod dunga teri”

“darasal, main ab puri tarah samajha ki aap sab Varun se itna nafrat kyun karte ho…ab mujhe iska reason samajh me aaya hai…aap log Varun se nafrat karte ho kyunki uski family humse jyada paisewali hai… uske dad ki pahuch aapse jyada hai aur school ke har function me aapse pahle Varun ke papa ka samman kiya jata hai… isiliye aap sab Varun se nafrat karte hai…nahi ye sahi word nahi rahega…nafrat nahi…nafrat nahi….jalna…ye word perfect rahega…. Aap sab Varun se jalte ho kyunki unki family humari family se jyada powerful hai… common dad, grow up”

“teri himmat kaise hui dad ki insult karne ki…”Vipin bhaiya apni jagah se uthe aur mujhe marne ke liye apna hath utha liya…

“last time tujhe school me bola tha na be… ki yadi tune ab aage se mujhpar kabhi hath bhi uthaya toh MAA KASAM zinda gaad dunga…. Remember…theoretically samajh nahi aaya lagta hai, practically samjhana padega”Vipin bhaiya ka hath pakad kar unhe peechhe dhakka dete hue maine kaha


aur mere aisa karte hee mere papa ne meri jo thukayi start ki wo bahut der tak chali aur usi thukayi ke dauran ek scene aisa aaya jisme mujhe marte hue mere papa achanak rook gaye… bole toh same wahich situation jo kuch der pahle school ke main gate se nikalte waqt thi…ek baar phhir se mere charo taraf ke drishya bahut tezi se badalne laga…aur abki baar mera sar bhi ghoomne laga… mujhe aisa laga ki mujhe chakkar aa rahe hai aur jab ye changing khatm hui toh main wapas apne school ke basketball court me tha…. Lekin abki baar waha main akela nahi tha…waha koyi match chal raha tha aur main, Varun ke sath waha court ke bahar baitha us match ka anand le raha tha….

“tera sar kaisa hai, kafi chot lagi hai tujhe aur lawde tu has kyun raha hai… waise thanks…tu beech me nahi aata toh jo zakhm abhi tere body par hai wo mere body pe hote”

“sirf sar wala hota, baaki face wala bapu ne diya tha…kal sham ko…”

“tere baap ne tujhe itne bure tarike se mara…?”chauk kar mere chehre ke nishan ko dekhte hue Varun ne kaha “Arman, tu apne baap par case kar de… main apne baap se baat karu…?”

“yes…basket… apni team ab haar jayegi… yes…woooh… salo ne mujhe ye bolkar team me nahi liya tha ki main cricket me dhyan doon…ab lawda le le, school wale…. District level me hee sale bahar ho jayenge…”

“tune jawab nahi diya , tu bole toh apne baap se tere baap ke baare me baat karu…”

“kis baare me… yessss…. Opponent team ne phhir se basket kiya…”

“wahi tere baap ke upar police case ke baare me…”

“the more pain we feel, stronger we become… par main kabhi-kabhi sochta hoon ki…. yar, zindagi kitni simple hoti yadi hum family ke chutiyape me nahi padte toh…. tujhe kya lagta hai kaun jeetega…aaj ka match”

“tu kab se itna interest lene laga basketball me… jaha tak main tujhe jaanta hoon uske hisab se toh tu…..”

“if you think you know, you don’t know me at all…”Varun apni baat puri kar pata uske beech me hee maine kaha “dekh beta… ye cricket-vricket toh koyi bhi khel leta hai… lekin yadi ladkiyo ko impress karna hai toh basketball type ka game khelna shuru kar de… jis-se Reema toh kya uski badi bahan Seema bhi tujhse pat jayegi…”baithe-baithe ecliars chocolate khate hue maine Varun se kaha…. “is game me bahut rola hai, zara dekh kaise wo tujhse bhi badsurat launda basketball khelte hue smart lag raha hai…”

“bol toh sale aise raha hai… jaise khud bahut bada shurma ho is khel ka aur pachaso ladkiya pata rakhi ho… ”

“toh shurma ban jaunga…main jab bhi is game ko dekhta hoon toh , aisa lagta hai jaise main isi ke liye bana hoon… padhai toh main befaltu kar raha hoon… matlab mere andar se mujhe ahsaas hota hai ki main bahut achchha basketball khel sakta hoon… seriously , mujhe iske sapne bhi aate hai… jisme main toofan ki tarah basketball khelta hoon…ab pata nahi wo main hee rahta hoon ya koyi aur…. aur tu yakin nahi karega ki maine kabhi TV par is game ka ek match nahi dekha ,kabhi is game ki rulebook nahi padhi….lekin mujhe iske pure niyam maloom hai…ye game mere andar default app ki tarah hai….”

“aur wo kaise…”

“abhi bataya toh ki main sapne me ye game khelta hoon…bas wahi se… ab mera tujhse ek sawal hai….Varun kya tujhe basketball court hilta hua dikhayi de raha hai…”

“nahi toh…”

“chal phhir…… milte hai…..kuch din baad ya phhir…… kuch mahine baad ”khada hokar Varun se hath milate hue maine kaha “good byyyyee aur…….. Sonam ki maa ka bhosda…”

Maine Varun se itna kaha aur meri aankh apne aap ek pal ke liye band hui aur phhir dusare hee pal turant meri aankh khuli….as expected main Vandana Rathi ke gardan me gira pada tha…..

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